S and S

s/s if your in OKC i see signs all over at the nursing homes wanting CNAs. If this is what i think as a job the OSU extention here gives a class only lasting like 10 days with free enrollment if you agree to sign with one of there jobs placements. So if he already knows all this even if it meant taking this class to refress then take them up on their openings (i may have this all wrong but i think this is how it works,) and if your here now where did you find your meats?

Do not ask me why but the minute my husband tries to apply at these nursing homes they become rude and hostile. I really don't get it. I am standing there so I see what happens. He explains he went through a three week CNA school in Tennessee and is licensed there. We have the license and certificate with us, but they want him to transfer the license to Oklahoma and said they would not even take his application until the license is transfered. You would think they could at least look at it. I called the office that handles CNA licenses and they told me what forms to fill out and said it would take 2 to 3 weeks to get the transfer complete. I mean he just finished this school a few months ago so no point doing it again, especially since we paid $1000 for it last time (Tennessee doesn't have all the vocational school advantages Oklahoma does).

He has also applied through Integris and Norman, but no luck though they were nice and sympathetic.

Happy hump day MENA! I hope all goes well with you all and with all of those searching for jobs as well as people waiting for their SOs to come.

S and S,

Yes, its an extremely difficult for professionals who must start at the bottom again in the US. My thoughts are that you and your hubby work together to sell himself at an interview. To be told that he is over qualified is ridiculous (but not uncommon). Help him prepare a few comments to make during an interview. Something along the line of, " I understand that I may be considered overqualified, however I think this creates a great opportunity for us both. As an immigrant to the US, I will have to complete a residency program in order to become a licensed physician. I expected it will take a few years before I can enter a program. In the meantime, I've completed a certified nursing assistant program to establish myself in the healthcare field here in the US. Given the state of the economy, I would think you have your choice of candidates and that its to the benefit of your team and the hospital to hire someone who has skills and experience beyond your expectations." I think its worth a try, either they'll love it or hate. If they hate it, probably means they wouldn't have offered him the job anyway. Come up with a few responses and practice them.

I know its tough. I'm in school as well. We got married 2 months before I started my PhD program. It was stressful at times, helping my hubby apply for jobs, and getting to interviews (he didn't know his way around very well) plus my coursework. But everything did work out in the end. We had to budget very carefully. My hubby had a problem with underemployment. He had 2 positions that were supposedly full-time, but he was rarely scheduled to work full time. Anyway, just remembered it does get better in time. School should be your focus, but maybe you might want to look into temp work during school breaks and vacations. I had a few friends who did this in undergrad & grad school, they enjoyed the experience and extra cash.

Thanks for the advice on what to say. He has mentioned some of that when dealing with recruiters, but he is never allowed to talk to the managers who actually make the hiring decisions. This means he nevers gets the chance to sell himself. The hospital recruiters have been nice and very sympathetic, but so far no news and he applied for these jobs weeks ago and we see they are still open.

H is unemployed.... He finally reached his limit of tolerance and just threw in the towel... He's been working in a restaurant where he was constantly being harassed and called "the terrorist" by the Mexican employees who thought he didn't understand much English because they typically heard him speaking arabic with the manager who is from Jordan. Amazingly once the manager got wind that H was being harassed (the assistant manager told him, not H) the manager decided to make his work so hard that H would leave... Rather than deal with his employees harassing H it was easier to get rid of H...

On top of all of that, one of the Mexican women who had done the loudest talking about "the terrorist" had male family members come to the restaurant and sit out side watching H and even followed him part of the way home, which is what made him decide the job just wasn't worth his safety...

I'm so depressed because it's his first and only job (other than working in our family business for a few weeks) and now he really can't use it as a reference because he walked out... So hard to explain on applications that you're his age and don't have ANY verifiable work history!

He wasn't too proud to work at any job that wasn't haram.... and for that I love him even more... He was so happy to just be making SOMETHING so he could contribute, and now the sadness in his eyes is killing me.

He has a bachelor's degree in Greek Philosophy (big call for THAT!!! NOT!!!) .... and was self-employed his entire life in Egypt... not a single thing in his work history that he can use here.... I don't know what to do to help him... It's so hard when you're his age to start over.... we need to think of a business he can do on his own, but so far, I've not come up with an idea that won't take all my time... I'm working 10+ hours a day already running my own consulting business...

It's so hard on his Egyptian Machisimo Pride/Dignity.... I never dreamed it would be THIS hard to find something! ANYTHING!! Unemployment here is about 13% even the Labor Ready shop is closed... Soooooo depressing...

I am so sorry to hear about all your difficulties. It is horrible that anyone should go through such troubles when they just want to work. Someone suggested to us this afternoon to try 7-11 (the convenience store) as they even have starting pay at about $11 an hour and always need people. We plan to check that out tomorrow. It isn't what we want, but it is a start so hopefully they will give him a chance and we can always work on finding something medical related later.

I wish you and your husband good luck. Hopefully he will find something better. It really does seem like such a long search.

try Fresenius Medical Care and Davita. They are both big Dialysis Companies. Usually they are hiring Patient Care Techs. You can go on their web sites and look for openings in your area. They train you and you don't need experience. Would be nice if you were a CNA with who has their Med Aide Cert.

I checked out both those companies. They sound like great companies, but there are no openings that fit his skills or in his area. Both companies are around my area, just no jobs he can do. Thanks for the advice. I may keep it in mind for the future as you never know what jobs may come up later!

The problem is my husband is a medical school graduate. It will take a couple years to get through the exams and start residency so for now he must find some other work. We had hoped to keep him in the medical field with a lower job. I even sent him through Nursing Assistant school and he got the certification for that. He has applied through two health care systems, but no call back. The hospital recruiter at one really wants to help him, but the managers keep saying my husband is over qualified. It is really frustrating. He even took the hospital tests for both Nursing Assistant and Medical Assistant (though he didn't go to Medical assistant school) and he passed both tests. We tried the nursing homes, but they want him to switch his license to the state we moved to and that takes time, though we will do it. For now, the nursing homes will not even look at his application.

Although I am USC and there are surely barriers that I have not had to deal with, I do have a suggestion that maybe will work for your husband. I'm a Physical Therapist Assistant. I do not hold a permanent job at any one facility, but work through an agency. It's kind of like having an agent....I tell them when I'm available to work, and they market me to facilities they have contracts with. I know that my agency is nationwide and they do place CNA's--not sure about Medical Assistants. If you would like u can PM me and I can get u the info about my agency....GOOD LUCK!!!

Do you have any idea what their requirements are for CNA's? The two agencies we talked to wanted the one year experience. If you think there is a chance, then it would be worth checking into.

I have put a call in to my company. Since I am in the Allied side of things (therapies) my agent didn't have the specific answers for me. I gave her the information that I have about ur husbands' situation. She is looking into it for me and says she will give me a call back. I would be surprized to hear back from her today, but will be more than happy to let u know as soon as she or someone else from my company gets back with me.

Take care,

Melynda

Thank you so much for going through all this trouble. I truly appreciate it. Please do let me know if you hear anything.

Thanks for taking the time to write everything out. Those are good suggestions. We have done some of them, but not all. I will certainly keep your advice in mind. As for money, it is tricky. I'm not working anymore and will start unemployment soon. I am going back to school and will get paid almost a $1000 a month while in school, but that isn't much. We really do need him to work at least a decent job to make up the difference though it doesn't have to be super paying for starting out of course. Surviving and keeping up on the minimum bills is the key.

If he needs a year of school to get a decent job, then put him in school! While it's not the ideal situation, could you put off your school for a year while he gets certified? Then he could make a decent salary and support you while you go to school.

Would you both be able to work ok jobs and go to school part time? That may work. When AbuS arrived, I worked full time and went to school part time at night. It made for some long days (7:30 am until 10 pm), and it didn't do much for our relationship, but it kept us from being homeless.

I will say this now ladies - DO NOT expect your husband to get a job that pays a decent wage. If he does, then you can be pleasantly suprised. But if he doesn't, then you won't be screwed over because you planned for him to bring in x amount. Best to plan for the worst and hope for the best.

And if you're still in school or plan to go back soon, put off immigration if it's possible. I was ready to file for AbuS in 2003, but waited until 2005 because I wanted to complete my BA and get a job that would support us before bringing him here. I ended up pursuing a certificate while he was here, but we did ok moneywise with just my job, even paying for school.

Our problem is we don't have children now and putting off my school would mean trying to work, take care of children and go to school. Also, I must go to school full time to receive the $945 a month as well as my going to the university is free, but his schooling would not be. I have a limit on how long I can use the free tuition as well. Also, I will start unemployment next month which can bring in another $1400 a month for nine months. If I work and go to school part time I lose the unemployment and part of the $945. It makes more sense for him to work any job, even with small wages to make up the difference of what I'm not making. Whereas if I work instead we will make much less money since I have no degree or certifications. We are planning to send him to another school part time once he does have a stable job so that he can later try for a better job.

The problem is my husband is a medical school graduate. It will take a couple years to get through the exams and start residency so for now he must find some other work. We had hoped to keep him in the medical field with a lower job. I even sent him through Nursing Assistant school and he got the certification for that. He has applied through two health care systems, but no call back. The hospital recruiter at one really wants to help him, but the managers keep saying my husband is over qualified. It is really frustrating. He even took the hospital tests for both Nursing Assistant and Medical Assistant (though he didn't go to Medical assistant school) and he passed both tests. We tried the nursing homes, but they want him to switch his license to the state we moved to and that takes time, though we will do it. For now, the nursing homes will not even look at his application.

Although I am USC and there are surely barriers that I have not had to deal with, I do have a suggestion that maybe will work for your husband. I'm a Physical Therapist Assistant. I do not hold a permanent job at any one facility, but work through an agency. It's kind of like having an agent....I tell them when I'm available to work, and they market me to facilities they have contracts with. I know that my agency is nationwide and they do place CNA's--not sure about Medical Assistants. If you would like u can PM me and I can get u the info about my agency....GOOD LUCK!!!

Do you have any idea what their requirements are for CNA's? The two agencies we talked to wanted the one year experience. If you think there is a chance, then it would be worth checking into.

Ahmeds first and only job so far is a company that packages and processes foods like ketchup, mustards, salad dressings etc. Now his job has something to do with the packaging and boxing, something like 3-4 thousand filled boxes a day, (he lifts and stacks). This is the bottom job apparently and very hard but he is sticking it out. Now the thing is he talks to a few of the Mexican (there are all kinds of races there, everything is covered) and this mexican starts to tell him how he has been here 7 years with NO papers, working, and ALL his family is the same way. Ahmed doesnt get it why is he still here, how can he stay and all his family why do they go home etc......The company directly hired ahmed (helped i worked across the street for a state legal division) but alot come thru temp agencies but the biggest BUT is he got the lowest job. Now one day two bosses were assigning jobs and they told him here you stay at this station, and as they walked away he overheard them say (that job is for the foreigners), this one job usually gives people two hour shifts rotation but not for him he gets to stay all day. Now you tell me there is not racists against him compared to the ones who were also foreigners (viet naim, mexico, black, one was lebonese i believe all kinds. Cant something be done against those working with no papers ? I think they see somebody working very hard to please them, doing better than most have ever done, sticking out the situation and they are just letting him continue to please them but keeping him at the bottom.

At home he owned a grocery, degree in literature and also speak 3 languages

That is ridiculous and not very encouraging since I'm in the same city as you now. Jobs in OKC are not easy to get, as we have figured out. We keep looking though. I agree there is some racism going on because of so many illegal workers here that they can get cheap.

AbuS' first job was in a check cashing place. Total soul suck and haram to no end.

There are a few things that really helped him:

1. Internship. I wish we had thought of this sooner. He got an internship as an accountant in a non profit. This was how he landed his first real job as an accountant at a theater. He learned valuable lessons of how to work in an american office, bulked up his resume and he got a fabulous reference who helped him beyond compare. If you are ok on money and dont need him earning a ton of money, americorp offers a lot of internship type opportunities that look fabulous on the resume.

2. Practice practice practice. Practice job interview. Practice writing cover letters. Practice writing resumes. Practice until he's perfect, literally. The accent may not have completly disapeared, but he should be able to hold a phone conversation without confusing the person on the other end. And his cover letter should be fluent enough that the receipient won't be befuddled by the quirky english.

3. ESL classes. Even if he thinks he's good, he could probably stand for some improvement. And if the local ESL classes say he's good enough, find a way for him to speak english with a wide variety of people. I can't emphasize enough how important verbal communication is for landing a good job.

4. Keep a list of everywhere he's applying. Seriously, spreadsheet. If he's applying for a dozen jobs a week, it can be hard to keep track of them.

5. Don't answer the phone. Now, this may sound counterproductive, but it works. If they're interested in him, they'll leave a message. Listen to the message, consult the list of jobs, review the job posting, review the cover letter he sent and then call them back. That way he has a chance to compose himself and sound put together and with it. This is seriously how my husband landed his current job. They were so impressed with his initial phone interview that they asked him to come in ASAP and hired him 2 hours after the interview.

6. Job training. If he doesn't have a college education (or even if he does and isn't have any luck finding work with it), look into a job training program. They will help him with the necessary skills for job hunting and will help him in his search.

7. Patience! Patience! Patience! It took AbuS 3 years to find a good job, and many many many many long months of unemployment that were increadibly demoralizing. And then just when everything was looking up, he lost that good job due to the economy. It sucks. It really really does. But inshaAllah this too shall pass.

Thanks for taking the time to write everything out. Those are good suggestions. We have done some of them, but not all. I will certainly keep your advice in mind. As for money, it is tricky. I'm not working anymore and will start unemployment soon. I am going back to school and will get paid almost a $1000 a month while in school, but that isn't much. We really do need him to work at least a decent job to make up the difference though it doesn't have to be super paying for starting out of course. Surviving and keeping up on the minimum bills is the key.

We tried the medical temp places. All of them want him to have one year experience as a nurse's assistant and say his work as a doctor outside the country does not count. They also want his license to be in-state which will take time to transfer, so no luck there

My husband had no luck finding a job in the same field that he has worked in for 14 years which was the legal field. He did work temporarily for CBS Personnel at Kohl's Distribution Center. This was his first job. It only lasted a few months because he was holiday help. Since then he has worked in a crummy hotel doing whatever they need and at their beck and call and his second job is working at a phone that basically cells everything but their specialty is cell phones. The owner is a man from Jordan. His pay is basically below minimum wage and he is promised that once he learns the job it will doubled. We will see......

I like Reeses16 advice. We did most of those but almost and still are losing hope. It's hard going from attorney to housekeeper ya know? You have to do what you have to do though. I can only advise persistance. I hope one day it pays off for us.

I'm sorry you have had so many difficulties too. I knew it would be hard, but I really thought the health care industry would be easier, especially after I sent him through nursing assistant school as there is a demand for those jobs. Hopefully something will turn up.

The problem is my husband is a medical school graduate. It will take a couple years to get through the exams and start residency so for now he must find some other work. We had hoped to keep him in the medical field with a lower job. I even sent him through Nursing Assistant school and he got the certification for that. He has applied through two health care systems, but no call back. The hospital recruiter at one really wants to help him, but the managers keep saying my husband is over qualified. It is really frustrating. He even took the hospital tests for both Nursing Assistant and Medical Assistant (though he didn't go to Medical assistant school) and he passed both tests. We tried the nursing homes, but they want him to switch his license to the state we moved to and that takes time, though we will do it. For now, the nursing homes will not even look at his application.

Hello MENA, just checking in here to say hello. I hope everyone is doing well.

Since my husband and I moved and can seriously start his job search, it has been really difficult. The economy doesn't help of course, but many of the jobs he has looked at required 1 year experience and/or certifications which require school. I am curious what were some of the jobs other SOs started out with so we can have a better idea of what to do. We are considering a wide range at this point because he really needs to work as I'm going back to school. Thanks for any input.

My grandfather was surprised by the mess I went through as he could recall the military actually shipping all the soldiers wives here after the war. There was no major immigration process. In fact, some wives made it to the US before the soldiers did and had to meet the family alone. He couldn't believe all the grief I went through.

I wanted to ask a few questions about the adjustment of status. My husband is supposed to adjust his status to permanent resident after residing here one year. I also remember the refugee agency saying you could actually put the paperwork in a little sooner than that, especially since his documents will expire for him to work and be here. We moved states so now the refugee agency will not help us when it is time to adjust status. I know we don't pay the AOS fee, but it does say we should pay the fingerprint fee. Also, it says to provide proof of his residing here in the US continually. I'm not sure how to do this as he hasn't found work yet and all the bills are in my name. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

When I was in my husband's country, I didn't know him and it wasn't under the best circumstances, but I can say the sunsets were beautiful there and the traffic was crazy. In Syria I was surprised by how old it seemed. I felt like I was walking through history and appreciated the fact they hadn't westernized so much that you couldn't see the old styles. As for Jordan, I was surprised they had such a huge mall (Mecca Mall).

For my husband, he is still getting over the cost of living. We moved to Oklahoma a couple weeks ago and there are no jobs. He is doctor but he can't work as one without a license and that process is long, but they require certifications in every medical job which all require specific schools. It is really frustrating for him.

The roller coaster ride is horrible while waiting. You start to get your hopes up and then they get dashed, then you get hope again and it makes you crazy. I finally couldn't believe my husband was here until I had him in my arms. Its been six months and we still hug each other close remembering the long wait. Don't get me wrong, life isn't perfect, lol. He still asks a lot of questions and now we moved to another state and still no luck finding work. Things can be frustrating, but if you truly love each other, you can stick it out and have a wonderful marriage. I still thank God that he sent me husband to me. The waiting and frustrations were all worth it (though occasionally your patience runs thin after he is here but its rare for us).

Welcome to VJ. I have been really busy lately and hadn't had time to check in. Unfortunately your case is much like some of us who went through extremely long processes to get our spouses to the US. I waited 18 months from the time I married my husband. Others have waited longer, some slightly less long. It ended up being faster for me to bring my husband over as a refugee (which he qualified for after I filed his papers). Even then his security background check took about 7 months, this was with refugee. I have seen other women who went through the regular spouse visa who waited a year or more on background checks. This is not bright news and it killed me at the time while waiting. I was completely miserable, but it did end eventually and my husband finally arrived last December. You have to be strong and prepared for the worst because I haven't seen many Iraqi cases go fast. Far more take a long time. My husband has a friend in Syria who married and American almost two years ago. He did not arrive in the US until two weeks ago. He stayed on those background checks at the embassy for about a year.

Please forgive me for sounding bleak, but I wish someone had warned me because I got my hopes up too many times. Every girl on this site married to an Iraqi went through this same roller coaster ride of waiting. If it is possible for you, go back to Syria to visit your husband when you can. That is where I married my husband as well so you probably went through the same court I did for the marriage. If you need any advice or just have questions, feel free to ask.

i think its probably best to get cds and stuff from ur spouces country. that way u learn their dialect. ive tried those online things and they speak differently then my husband does. i repeated it exactally and he didnt have a clue of what i was talking about. so i gave up.

I get that problem sometimes because my formal arabic is better than my Iraqi Arabic. Usually the highly educated arabs understand me, but not always with others. Then there is the different dialects even within a country and that you still have the American accent altering the word to a certain degree though we don't always hear it.

It takes practice and having your SO help makes a difference.

For Arabic Lessons I am still on my alphabet and numbers. I am on the same wave length S and S that my real motivation will come once I'm in Egypt. Right now I'm packing things and moving while in dead week and finals. I have to finish my take home finals before next week and my motivation is finished because my heart and mind already left for Egypt planning the wedding celebration and seeing Hubby, but if I think too much about it I get nervous and excited.

I can imagine you are getting excited to go. I hope you keep us updated on how things are going.

That was good, thanks for the laugh!

Here is an example:

http://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-...3159_1105397318

Where do you live?

Moving to Oklahoma City