kd4uvc

Also, i know you don't know everything because I don't know everything. I am finding things out because I am finally getting her to open up. it is confusing somewhat to me but as time goes, I am finding out good information as to what went on there.

I'll quit my job if you will support me. No one else will hire me because I am a diabetic and am handicapped. War wound. As far as me going there, it will make no difference. What she needed to know that I am telling the truth and they were lying, she has already seen. I just had to remind her. They told her I would abandon her. They harassed her to the point of almost brainwashing. The truth will work or we do not work. I have proven to her time and time again what lengths I'd go to help family.

Here's the skinny. She was embarassed and harassed by the biddies at her Woman's Day Party. It was about her being embarassed. We talked a long time, just getting off the phone. No, I did not agree to send her a ring. If we stay together, she will not get a ring until she is here. We have much damage to overcome. They, the biddies, have convinced her that I will bring her here and dump her on the streets. Now, why would I spend so much money and just do that? It does not make sense. If our talk gets more positive, I will ask some of the women from Russia to email and write her. Maybe we can get it set up where they can converse by voice on the computer. She is a very confused woman now. The biddies have done major damage to her and me. Most of them are divorced and giving advice on marriage. Go figure. It was shocking that I would talk a few minutes, then tell her what happened, talk some more and tell her another thing which happened at the party. You could tell I was hitting the nail and driving fully on the first swing. I know you think I should dump her. I still see good in her. I knew since the start that she is easily pursuaded. Especially in the wrong direction. I have always chosen well in friendship. I still believe this could be good.

I know this, no more Woman's Day parties for her. No biddie parties for her either. Before you criticize me for not giving up, what would you do if you had to fight for your loved one? What is enough? We each have our own standards. I still have no guarantee. But I do not give up because I still think she is worth fighting for.

I have plenty of time to heal. The last time between girl friends was two years. I was honest enough to end that one, American, because even though I liked her, I did not love her and it was not fair to her. I keep no secrets and expect the same. I am honest when I make a mistake and will admit to it and come up with a solution when I can, I expect the same. I will talk and try to work out any problem, and expect the same. It wasn't religion which kept most of my father's and grandfather's generation together for over 50 years of marriage, it was respect. I was taught that well.

She and her friends have come up with something which cost us the relationship. She doesn't expect me to give up, just give her the damn ring now. I will move on. Novosibirsk's Desperate Divorced Housewives Club came up with another brainchild, but they still wonder why they stay divorced. Go figure.

Update, she used the excuse of me not buying her a ring immediately for the excuse. And you are right, it is over. The money for the medicine over a year did not amount to one week's pay there. She got drunk with her biddies on woman's day and they concocted a scam to get me to do things. Didn't work. It hurts. But being slammed here didn't help either. I was looking for answers. I got them.

Posted for the one's who were sympathetic.

Since some view me as a threat because my fiancee dumped me, please remove me from the membership of this forum. I looked for a place to do this but was unable. Thank you for your support.

Robert

I got hit by a bulldozer of a problem today. I do not expect sympathy from you. Just remember to pass the word to others that some of the friends they have will do harm. Since I am considered a threat to this forum, I will send my thanks and leave.

I met her on a website. I don't even remember the name of it. We have been talking on the phone for the last 1 1/2 years. I went to St. Petersburg and paid for her flight to join me there. She will not come.

I wish I could fly to Novosibirsk, but I would lose my job. My job is my lifeline. I am a diabetic and no one will hire me now. It is a good job and I cannot afford to lose it because if I lose it, I lose my life. I have known her for a long time. She did not ask for money for the daughter, it is not a money issue. It is an issue of she does not believe that I will stay married to her. She has had two pathetic husbands, I did check this out. One was not faithful, getting several women in the building where she lived pregnant, the other turned out to be gay and used her for a promotional stepping stone. I do not need an interpreter to speak with her. She can write well enough to understand the forms, that was my red flag. She has something in her past which she does not want me to know. She cut both of our throats to keep the secret. The biggest problem is my personal beliefs, I made a promise to her and to God. I cannot break that promise. I promised to be faithful to her, and I shall. Because she doesn't honor her promise which she made also does not give me the OK to do the same. It took me 44 years to find the one which stole my heart. I can live alone, for I won't live another 44 years. Thanks for the support. Maybe someday soon she will realize the mistake and rethink her thoughts.

For an hour, I talked with her. Some damn idiot which claims to be her friend has convinced her that I would abandon her and leave her stranded. She is convinced that her coming her would be a burden on her and me. She thinks she will be a burden on me financially on her. If I could get my hands on this friend,... How can I talk and convince her of how her thoughts of me and the burden issue is wrong when I can only talk with her on the phone and her friends can talk face to face. She thinks she will be better off living there. She makes $200 a month, has to buy her daughter medicine for leukemia, and food. Several days ago, she almost passed out due to not eating. I believe it is due to not having money. I have asked her to tell me when she needed money for her daughter's medicine but she rarely requested it. I believe it is a death sentence for her daughter. I make good money. I drive a Mercedes, 2006, Harley 2006, own my own home. I live 92 miles from work and am in the process of selling it. I was going to buy a home closer to work. I grew up in a family which doesn't get divorces. The average marriage lasts over 50 years. It is the rule, not the exception. I waited until I found someone which loved me very much. Unfortunately, I lose her due to bad advice from her friends. It is my loss!!

Beata dumped me because her friends fed her a line of bull about me leaving her stranded or alone. She called our life together a dream which would not be a reality. She hurt me so much when she broke up with me. She had decided weeks ago but decided to wait until after she got her Woman's Day gift. I would have given her all I had. The worst thing she took from me was my heart.

No, I did not send her flowers. I sent her what she wanted. She gets mad when I send flowers. It's not the fact of the holiday, she used it as an excuse. She is doing strange things when I ask certain questions she has previously answered. I am not sure that she wants to fill out the paperwork. This has been happening for weeks now. She has started not eating, she lives with her parents now and they have food. There are some strange things going on and all together is causing me to question our relationship. She received her gift on Wednesday and afterwards, it was like sometimes, I did not exist. Whatever is going on, I cannot help if I don't know.

I don't know who. She just said yesterday morning that she received an email and she replied to it. I am getting seriously fustrated with her. The only thing on her mind the last few days was the Woman's Day Party with her friends and family. She is pushing my limit.

Lord, I saw her pics when she was younger. Pork chop on a string comes to mind.

NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate competition!!!!!!!!!!!!

And from heaven, (or whereever), Brother Dave Gardner yells AMEN in his southern voice!! If you do not know who he was, look him up on the net. A very good southern Avant Garde comedian from the 50's and 60's.

eekee,

I copied what you typed out to send to her. I wish she would look at the website but I am not sure she knows how to look it up. She did not get the copy. R & I emailed her and she said that she replied to her. I think I am dealing with a confidence problem with her. She is an attorney there but she has a slight confidence problem with English. She speaks well and writes ok, nothing a spell checker could not handle. She is afraid of making a mistake in English. I have never witnessed a person which spoke or wrote perfect English. I do not think it is possible.

I just want her to fill the forms out and get them to me so we can start the process. Every day I get more lonely being away from her.

Robert

PS: Thanks for the help!!

Thomas, your moma didn't take the bouncing baby part a bit too literally? I'm afraid to ask if you slapped yourself on the date? Or did the mirror crack when you kissed? etc...

Thanks, I sent it to her and now we wait.

New, as green as those beans I ate for lunch!! No, not the emission kind!!

Won't work Slim, "eh" is the even letters of the 52 letter alphabet. The odd ones are the same as our's. At least that's what I was told by someone when I was in Wisconsin back in the 80's. Good man, but was suprised that I knew what shoes were and that I could read and write. I did not tell him that I knew Prufrock could measure his life by the teaspoon nor that MacBeth's lover was also his Mom. You have to know English lit to know what I am talking about. BS in Technology with minor in English and Tech Writing. I just prefer to write as I talk. When I lived in Idaho in the early 80's, I called home and my mother told me I had lost my accent. It broke my heart because I was proud of where I came from and who I am. I promised myself that I would never lose it again, and I haven't.

I am a southerner, I am not a racist. My dream team for the president/vp is JC Watts/ Condi Rice. One of my best friend's wifes was an illegal alien in the 60's, was pardoned by Ford, and has served 30 years in the Army. She started out as E-1 and is up for Lt. Col. She has never listened to someone who told her she could not do something. She is one of my heros. Earned by blood, sweat, toil, and tears.

I am in a programming class this week. The instructor is a 24 year old girl which knows her stuff. We were talking about the southern women's saying, "Bless Your Heart". She is from Michigan and lives in Nashville. After a few years in the south, she said that she is finally starting to understand the meaning. I told her it is not the words which is important but how we say it and what is happening when we say it. She said that she has learned that.

Sorry, just ramblin!!

I guess I need to say to her I need the following paperwork:

1. Divorce papers so I can get them translated.

2. Police record paperwork for you and Oksana so I can get them translated.

3. Places where you have lived for the last 5 years so I can put them on the 325 form.

4. Name, address, phone # in Russian so they can mail things to you.

5. All data needed on 325 form for Beata and Oksana.

6. ....

Anything else y'all can think of.

I am getting fustrated with myself because I cannot communicate to her what she needs to send to me because of my lack of Russian and my ignorance of the proceedures here.

She is getting fustrated because of her lack of the necessary English to fully understand.

Now, don't y'all fret. I ain't getting mad at her. If anything, I'm trying to keep her patient. I want her here, y'all know the feeling. I did not know what lonely was until I met her. I hate that feeling. I need your help. I ain't afraid to ask. Y'all are a good bunch and the only thing on the net which made me feel like I could make it happen. I got BS (cow patties for those who were offended) from the professional legal side from many. If I need to spend the money, I will but if I can use that money on better things like clothing for them when they arrive and another car because I only have one, I will do that.

If it will help, I will ask permission from her to pm you her email so you can speak to each other in Russian. I think that will give her confidence but I will respect her privacy and ask before I give.

As far as this website goes, "That Dog Hunts!!!"

Sorry about taking time to get back. What I need is someone in simple Russian write down what she needs to send me for the USCIC part, I-129. I'll get it translated. I can talk to her in English but she is in a tiffy when it comes to understanding what I need here.

I want to know, is your cooking that bad? My family for some reason makes sure the males in the family can cook before they teach the females. Then we are expected to teach our brides to cook. I ain't making this up. I was scratch baking puddings at the age of 9, when they realized I could read a cookbook. Used a Watkin's cookbook written in 1928. It is still used and in the family. It was my paternal grandmother's first cookbook. She went to college, graduated in 1928 (I graduated from the same college, now university 65 years later). She was expected to teach, not be a housewife, lasted 6 weeks in the schoolhouse. Married my grandfather and was married for 50 years and one week in happiness.

Boy, that is pert-near quick as a jackrabbit. I do appreciate it very much and if you let me know when you get married, I'll dance a jig to celebrate you wonderful day.