PJB

Mox,

I assume you are referring to the state of emergency Saakashvili declared on November 7, 2007 which suspended all media production. The state of emergency was rescinded on November 17, 2007 and free public elections were announced for the following January. In that election Saakashvili beat out his opponents 2 to 1 each.

The media suspension was for a few weeks. It is not government policy in Georgia.

How about that getting elected by an overwhelming majority! Right after he stopped all his opponents from publishing THEIR views. Let's see... the reason for the state of emergency was........Hmmmmm........Oh yeah. Too many people disagreeing with him. And now he lets all those people go on TV and say how glad they are that he got elected and has pulled a Bozo stunt that got their homeland blown to bits. Nothing like good old democracy in Georgia. You betcha.

I've got a freezer full of pelmeni and vareneki too. But I'm too lazy to make it. I buy it in Hollywood. But after church last Sunday I stopped by the Russian stores and stocked up on black bread and beer. Big sale on Russian, Ukrainian and Latvian beers, so I bought them all! Too bad we don't have salla

That's my excuse. I still lurk about here (not that I was all that active to begin with) but only add the odd comment, in between duties here at work.

You need to update your webpage . I really enjoy reading it and keeping up on your family's VJ. I loved all the pics and videos (even liked the Russian movie). But especially helpful was your pics of the visa package documents. I admit to plagerizing your Proof of Relationship packet (with my own info of course), it was a great help!

Well, it looks like the Russian way of giving your word really depends on who's doing the interpretation. According to the published reports about the cease fire agreement, the Russians were to pull back to positions prior to the skirmish. But, recent news accounts state that the Russian army is building security posts outside of South Ossetia and well within Georgia. There is even one being constructed 30 km from Tbilisi.

I guess that Russia really lives in fear that mighty Georgia will stage an attack and destroy everything that the Russians believe is theirs.

I'm sorry if anyone believes that Putin is such a wonderful man. Yes, he is a strong leader, but does that mean he needs to suppress any news that is not favorable to him. Does he need to insure no opposition leader has a chance of running against him or his cronies? Does he need to restrict access to world information until is has been sanitized by his information bureau? Ask yourself why is being a news reporter a deadly profession in Russia? He's KGB, do you know what that means?

Those who don't learn from history, are doomed to repeat it.

Hmmmm, I recall that only a short time ago the current president of Georgia got kinda upset when the

Georgian TV stations started running news reports and advertisements about opposition to him. Being a fair and democratic president, he took over the TV stations and all that nasty free speech disappeared! Of course that wasn't suppressing any news unfavorable to him.........

I have a dumb question:

How is the US spouse communicating with non english speaking spouse. Is it that the non english speaker can read and type/write english, but cannot SPEAK it(at all or very well)? Or are there that many of the US spouses who speak the others' laguage?

Did I answer my own question? heh heh

I am American and speak Russian, my Russian husband speaks English. We are both not perfect in each other's language but we always understand each other . Usually we end up speaking a mish-mush of English/Russian. Some words just seem natural in one language or funnier in the other.

In CA the unified school districts adult education depts offer English classes for free. Community college classes are expensive if you don't have a 1 year residency and they are also hard to get into (in the LA County areas) due to huge demand. Try finding a private teacher. I've known American college kids who teach ESL for as low as $20/hr. Even though not certified they did a great job and the results were better and faster than lessons given in a classroom. They usually post their advertisements on the college bulletin boards.

Yes. Check out the CA DMV website. It tells all the documents you need and you can even download the CA driving test booklet in many languages. Also be sure to make an appointment online. I was in the local office last week and the budget cuts have turned the place into a nightmare. They will only see people with appointments until the budget crisis is over.

Our survival plan includes;

*working long hours and extra jobs (the money will come in handy when we file the affidavit of support)

*text or call every day or so (the phone lines are very bad in our town so we can't always get through, but texting usually works)

*send letters and packages to each other

*send messages and gifts via friends who have internet or are traveling between both countries

*I'm going back to language classes to improve my Russian language skills

*he's working on his English language skills

*send each other photos via internet

*he's slowly cleaning out our apt and getting things ready/packed for the move to US

*I'm slowly buying things we'll need to live together over here

*go to church a lot

*drink a lot

But if America restricts visas for Russians, Russia will restrict visas for Americans (reciprocity). Which means those of us who have a spouse in Russia won't be able to visit during this long stupid visa wait. Also if we want to visit relatives there it could be complicated or impossible. Then our Russian spouses with American citizenship could have trouble trying to visit back home and may run the risk of not being able to get back here.

It could get tough for USCs, but wouldn't she be in effect a dual citizen? So Russia wouldn't recognize her US passport, and she would use the Russian one. Vice-versa here.

My husband will come in on K3 visa but his mother is in her 80s and if something happens to her he wants to be able to get back to Russia quickly (and be able to come back to the US without any delays or problems). I am the USC but want to be able to visit him while we wait for the immigration process. Already all the new Russian visa restrictions and registration headaches are making getting back and forth difficult and stressful. Add to that the fear that Passport Control will not let one of us through is just too stressful. Last fall Russian Passport control refused exit to a French citizen who is the wife of a duma member. She has legal permanent residency in Russia and had just renewed her documents in Moscow. But they passed a new law and overnight everyone who had permanent residency needed NEW documents which take weeks or months to get. Just one of the fun little games that this stupid cold war mentality created.............

But if America restricts visas for Russians, Russia will restrict visas for Americans (reciprocity). Which means those of us who have a spouse in Russia won't be able to visit during this long stupid visa wait. Also if we want to visit relatives there it could be complicated or impossible. Then our Russian spouses with American citizenship could have trouble trying to visit back home and may run the risk of not being able to get back here.

How about that dried fish that men like to eat with beer? YUCK! Smells like cat food.......

Spending so long in Asia, we have dried squid too. We dip it in hot pepper paste. I still prefer the Russian beer, but gotta go with Asian dried salty sea stuff.

There's also that stuff called sallo...... ever heard of that? That's a pretty "Russian" thing to eat. "Hey, anybody want a piece of raw pork fat to go with their bitter beer?" (It is actually pretty good... especially with a clove of garlic, an onion and a tomato.)

salo i sjust pork fat.....pure fat, not like bacon cause bacon has a bit of meat on it.

take rye bread, take garlic and crush it against the edge of the bread and put some salt and it's so damn good and have it with borsch

I love сало! The best сало is from Ukraine. I freeze it then slice it paper thin. Put it on a peice of real black bread topped with хрен, heaven! Unfortunately it is illegal in the US and trying to sneak it through customs results in a pack of airport dogs attacking the suitcase.

Today's Los Angeles Times quotes an anonymous "American Official" saying that sanctions may be imposed against Russia. One of the sanctions he listed was restricting visas for Russians. This has me worried most of all............

Congrats!! I too filed in July, you've given me hope. What did you put in your packet that caught their attention so fast?

How about that dried fish that men like to eat with beer? YUCK! Smells like cat food.......

West Holiwood has lots of Russian delis and grocery stores but I make most of my own meals from scratch. Blini, salt pickles, plovf, and homemade bread too.

OBVIOUSLY WHEN I MET MY FIANCE I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WE WOULD HAVE A DAUGHTER AND GET MARRIED. IS THERE ANYWAY TO GET A PRINTOUT OF OUR OLD PLANE TICKETS AND WHAT NOT?

Your passports (old and new) should have the entry/exit stamps, use copies of them. Also use photos of all your years together including the dating times.

I'll just chip in true Ukrainian's prospective . Why we do swear on getting colds from "house wind" created by open windows/doors and horrible concequenses of seating on the granit for females, I've never ever heard that it might be unhealthy not to achieve "full release"...

P.S. Iodine and soda do work for sore throats, though. I wish I could get it into my fiance's head

My husband has tried more than once to treat me with iodine gargle, mustard plasters and lack of fresh air. We usually play musical windows all winter. I run around opening windows to get some relief from the +25C temperature (because the radiator can't be adjusted or turned off!) and he's right behind me shutting all the windows to save me from the evil draft.

I really enjoy Slim's sense of humor, but I may initially try a slightly different tac when Vika gets here.

When your wife whines give her 2 aspirin and a boot to the head...............

All these "pains" are very much a part of Slavic culture. In America we look at physical problems as something that should be attended to swiftly and efficiently with little or no whining involved. Take a pill, get an operation, get it fixed. But Slavic culture views ailments or physical complaints as something to be tended to by loving, caring family and friends. A quick fix with a pill is NOT accepted as a correct treatment. Family members are expected to offer love and comfort with hot teas, massage with medicinal creams, hot compresses and special foods. Even a trip to the doctor results in comforting advice and concern along with an RX.

The best way to treat your wife's pains is to be sympathetic, make hot compresses and cups of tea with lemon and honey. Massage her back and get a warm scarf for her neck. You are not dealing with mysterious illnesses, you are dealing with cultural differences that all those $$$ won't cure.

In other words your wife is seeking demonstrations of love from you. The more logic you give her the more "pains" she will develope.

I usually make her a warm glass of "shut the hell up." Probably not as effective as your method described above but I'm not a medical expert, especially not an Eastern medical expert. Munchausen syndrome gets no play in this house.

When she was working overtime at a the mom and pop restaurant and complained about her feet hurting, back hurting, wrists, etc., I had sympathy and suggested a workout regimen to combat the fatigue her body was starting to feel. If she would've listened to me and built up the muscles and flexibility required to sustain long work days she wouldn't have had so much pain. Instead, she suggested creams, oils, hot baths, warm tea and plenty of massaging and pampering by me. I'm happy to comply while she's working 40+ hours a week and has cause for aches and pains. However, it's an entirely different story when she works part time logging less than 20 hours a week.

I would love to be able to kill the aches and pains she feels. But, after visiting several doctors and noting how the aches and pains correspond with other emotional lows in her life, I'm more inclined to believe this is a mild form of malingering moreso than actual physical pain. Regardless of what it is or where it comes from it's not going to be dealt with by hugs and kisses, tender massages with warm oil, a warm scarf lovingly draped around her neck... it will be dealt with by overcoming a physical problem. If there is no physical problem then there is no problem, period.

One of these days folks on this forum are going to realize their S/O is here in the U.S. now and all the "#######" they brought with them needs to disappear in short order. I'm not saying they should lose their cultural identity but I am saying while they're in America they need to be doing American stuff. At minimum, they shouldn't be limited to not doing American stuff because of cultural issues. "I can't work over 40 hours a week because my feet hurt and you not make for me foot massage" is complete ####### and it needs to end.

There comes a time when the cultural crutch needs to break and folks start walking unaided.

(Good luck getting it to work in your house. I don't know, maybe I'm wrong about this. Maybe if I would pamper my wife a little more she would be able to work like a normal person. To me though, I don't see pampering after an 18 hour work-week helping her transition into a 46 hour work-week. But, once again, like most other things in my marriage, I'm probably wrong.)

Wow, the love and understanding is overwhelming............ бедная жена.

This is weird. All the pain that occurs in the kidneys is usually kidney stones.

Don't let your ladies go through the pain of those stones, please talk them into getting rid of them.

She doesn't have kidney pain. It's lower-abdominal pain. Sometimes it's back pain. Or, it could be neck pain. Her feet hurt a lot. Her wrists always hurt. Once, she had elbow pain. Headaches and stomach aches are quite common. Her legs often hurt after working more than four hours. Often she has pain in her ribs. I believe she's even told me her hair didn't feel good because her scalp was in pain.

No matter where her pain is, it's always a pain in my @$$.

All these "pains" are very much a part of Slavic culture. In America we look at physical problems as something that should be attended to swiftly and efficiently with little or no whining involved. Take a pill, get an operation, get it fixed. But Slavic culture views ailments or physical complaints as something to be tended to by loving, caring family and friends. A quick fix with a pill is NOT accepted as a correct treatment. Family members are expected to offer love and comfort with hot teas, massage with medicinal creams, hot compresses and special foods. Even a trip to the doctor results in comforting advice and concern along with an RX.

The best way to treat your wife's pains is to be sympathetic, make hot compresses and cups of tea with lemon and honey. Massage her back and get a warm scarf for her neck. You are not dealing with mysterious illnesses, you are dealing with cultural differences that all those $$$ won't cure.

In other words your wife is seeking demonstrations of love from you. The more logic you give her the more "pains" she will develope.

It seems some of you have misunderstood my situation. Here in the US, when we think of "Blue Balls", it's primarily a male condition, hence the name. And I too had always thought of it as just a made up condition that guys would tell women about to convince them to "go all the way". But after reading around, I see that it's a real condition in that some guys can experience discomfort, and that even some women can experience this, but I haven't seen anywhere that claims it can actually be harmful to your health.

However, this particular Ukrainian belief is that arousal without completion is bad for both women and men. And yes, the particular Ukrainian of significance to me has decided that the appropriate response is not to ensure a happy ending for everyone, but rather to avoid the arousal in the first place! It reminds me of my own reaction to something my grandmother used to say: "Give a lazy man a job and he'll find an easy way to do it." I always used to think, wouldn't a truly lazy man just not do the job?

And yeah, I don't think telling her what American doctors would say will help. I guess I was kind of hoping some Ukrainians or Russians would say that they had never heard of this, or that they know of this as some kind of folklore, so that I could at least say "See, some of your own people don't believe this either." To her it seems like a universal truth that we have somehow overlooked. It would be kind of awkward for me to take a poll when I'm there visiting her to see if the belief is as widespread as she says.

An alternative would be to find some reputable site that actually discusses this question. I have been able to make progress on some other topics by demonstrating that the preponderance of discussions lean one way or another. And to be fair, I've stopped drinking diet soda after reading various things about aspartame. She told me Americans were "naive" to believe that diet soda has no sugar, and that in fact the chemicals in it were far worse for you than sugar. I still don't believe that diet soda has sugar, at least not what we buy here in America. But I mostly only drink soda because it's free at work, and I'm perfectly happy to drink iced tea instead.

But other than "Blue Balls", I can't even figure out what to search for on this arousal topic. And the keyword "arousal" doesn't help much either.

Thanks for the help and support!

You are looking in all the wrong places for this topic. Try www.ellegirl.ru and www.cosmo.ru. These and any other female audience magazines give Russian girls and women advice on lots of health topics, especially sex. The articles are always written by Russian doctors who are just as popular and respected in Russia and Ukraine as are the American doctor/authors over here. And the advice is frequently along the lines of your Украинка's theory. So your best bet is not to fight the cultural belief but figure out how to work with it! These magazines will have not only the "problem" but advice on how to solve it (all from a source your honey will believe!)

So I've been reading some of the threads on cultural differences and having a good laugh, but there's one that 's come up for me and my Ukrainian fiancée that I would like to get some feedback on. She is "surprised that [Americans] don't know" that it is bad for your health (either a man or a woman) to become sexually aroused and not, um, achieve 'release' (to be polite). I've heard of "Blue Balls", but I've never seen anyone claim that it could actually be bad for you. You just 'release' or take a cold shower. I can research the effects of cold drinks, but other than "Blue Balls", I don't even know what to search for on this one. According to her, "any doctor will tell you" about this, and the effects include diseases of some sort.

Things like beliefs about cold drinks don't worry me, but in this case, it affects aspects of our relationship that are important to me, like intimacy. It's frustrating to me to think that intimacy would have to be all or nothing. I like lots of physical intimacy, like cuddling etc., and it doesn't always have to involve sex. I would hate to think that she's being less intimate or physical with me just because we're not going to "go all the way" every time we kiss! Yes, I'm exaggerating, but you get the idea.

Has anyone else heard this idea from their Ukrainian or Russian partner? Can anyone explain what the physiological process involved here is supposed to be? Is there any actual medical research that I can see that would back this up?

Please don't try to speculate about her or my motives (e.g. "She's just telling you that to get you to back off sexually"). I have no reason to doubt that she is being honest and straightforward with me. All I want is more information on this belief system.

From reading the other threads, it would seem there may be some interesting differences between the way medicine is practiced there and here, and I'd also be interested and entertained by any other such examples of the differences! (Which is why I left the subject generic )

Thanks!

Health practices and beliefs in Russia (my Ukrainian friends have similar beliefs) that differ from American "knowledge"........

*sex is healthy and normal, and a man or woman can end up with a lot of different illnesses if celibate or abstinate (poor nuns and priests!)

*cold (weather, drafts, drinks, foods, etc) can cause illness or complicate an injury or illness

*sweets and sugar are good for children

*fevers should be treated with warm blankets and hot drinks

*it is OK to sweat in your warm winter coat while in a hot store or subway then go outside into the snow (all damp and yucky inside your coat)but NEVER remove your winter coat unless you are inside a home or work, because taking off your coat in a store could cause you to catch cold

*ice cream or popsickles can cause sore throat

*a sore neck is an illness and reason to stay home from school or work

*treatments for sore throat include gargling with iodine, hot tea with lemon and honey, a warm scarf wrapped around your neck, a shot of vodka with lots of black pepper

*women should never sit on the ground, cement walls or steps, or stones because the cold will damage the female reproductive organs or get hemmoroids

*children should never sit on a cold floor (warm rugs are OK) because they will get sick

My husband and I spent months trying to get me a temporary resident card in Russia. We spent endless hours in lines at the immigration office only to be sent to a bank where we spent endless hours in line to pay the fees. Return to immigration office (same day) wait in line for hours again only to be told by the grouchy woman at desk 2 that desk 1 had given us the wrong paper and charged us the wrong fee so we must start all over again. After doing this silly game for several weeks we were told all was in order and to return in 3 months for the paperwork for step 2. When we returned in 3 months they opened our file and said they hadn't processed anything because we were given the WRONG paperwork and paid the WRONG fees!!! At least in America we can do it all on the computer.............

My friend's daughter comes over several times a year but over stayed her visa by a few days on the last visit. The next time she returned for a visit she was denied entry, interogated by the nasty immigration officers and made to wait in a dingy little room for 24 hours then put on a plane back to her home country! No hot meals or place to sleep after her 14 hour flight here. She refuses to ever come back to America.

I'm a July filer, have both NOA1's for I-130 and I-129F. Now I'm just waiting, waiting, waiting, waiting waiting......................