Missing.him

what does "skinny" mean?

non fat

skim milk

what does "skinny" mean?

non fat

skim milk

I used to be one of those people who hated on starbucks and all that stuff. I'd pick up every edition of adbusters and hate on corporations.

But starbucks is actually a great place to work and they offer their employees great benefits. Okay all the "I hate starbucks stuff" could be applied to any company.

I don't think their prices are that bad, they are pretty much the same as the second cup (a canadian coffee company) and Timothy's.

I don't mind paying extra for a good cup of coffee, you can't get the same kind of coffee at dunkin donuts.

I dont plan on ever hating starbucks. I LOVE THEM! I LOVE A BRAND!

I love Starbucks because where else can one get a triple venti peppermint and toffenut latte skinny (of course) YUMMY

may sound odd but so good!

You spend as much time "together" as possible. We use skype, email, and the webcam is a lifesaver!!! We plan our wedding even though we have no idea when it will be. When its really rough we cry, scream and curse (well at least i do!) You just have to realize that its not forever and at least we have each other , at least we know we will see each other again. I went through the physical pain last time David left. I went weeks without sleeping, could not eat, felt like I could die. But for me I had to get my a*# in gear as I have a small child. Yet I made it through that and we will see each other Friday for a few weeks or months depending on the POE. Yet we all have to go through this if we want to be together. Just think of it as a test of the strength of yourself and your relationship, you will make it through because the only other choice is to give up and I know for myself I am not giving up the only man that has made me believe in love..

So be strong! think of all the good times you have had and all the many more you will have in your lifetime together!!!!!!!

You brought tears to my eyes!!!

me?? aww i am sorry!!!

It made me a little weepy too!

MSN/Skype voice and video chat, play WoW together, we rent movies and watch them at the same time together while voice chatting. We eat dinner together on webcam, leave our webcam's on all night. It's pretty fun.

I work a lot and save as much money as I can and he does the same.

We are both working towards the same goal. I love him so much!

You spend as much time "together" as possible. We use skype, email, and the webcam is a lifesaver!!! We plan our wedding even though we have no idea when it will be. When its really rough we cry, scream and curse (well at least i do!) You just have to realize that its not forever and at least we have each other , at least we know we will see each other again. I went through the physical pain last time David left. I went weeks without sleeping, could not eat, felt like I could die. But for me I had to get my a*# in gear as I have a small child. Yet I made it through that and we will see each other Friday for a few weeks or months depending on the POE. Yet we all have to go through this if we want to be together. Just think of it as a test of the strength of yourself and your relationship, you will make it through because the only other choice is to give up and I know for myself I am not giving up the only man that has made me believe in love..

So be strong! think of all the good times you have had and all the many more you will have in your lifetime together!!!!!!!

Congrats!!! She will be fine and home with you soon!!!

Agreed - it is VITAL to have paperwork explaining any changes to name use. So any time you are required to show the birth certificate you will need to explain. Think of it this way, it's similar to when you first get married as a woman and have to take both your birth certificate and marriage certificate everywhere for a while to prove identity.

For the visa application you should use the name he is known by since everything except his birth certificate carries this name BUT get the name legally changed! Put the original surname in the other names used box and enclose the deed poll with a typed sheet explaining the circumstances and that he has obtained a legal change now to avoid any future problems.

I cited my circumstances since in the UK many women just return to using their maiden name without officially changing it back since there is no real legal requirement provided that you inform the tax office, etc. I changed mine because I needed to apply for a passport and I seem to recall it asked on the forms for documented evidence for that kind of change - but probably only since age 16.

You merely need to provide the details and state that as the change was made while he was a child that it never occurred to him to enquire as to whether any legal documentation had been issued to document the change until now.

Query though - was the name changed as part of an adoption process by the stepfather? Because that paperwork would probably work in much the same way as a marriage certificate, removing the need for a change by deed poll.

Hope that helps.

Thanks Hannah

No his name was never officially changes he was not adopted by his stepfather but his sister and him have went by that last name since before they even went to school.

he plans on changing it by deed poll

having a letter from his mother stating that he went by that name since age 4 I believe it was

I think he told me she was going to copy her marriage certificate as well showing her name change from his birth name to the name he uses now

we are going to use that name on the forms and list his birth name as other names used...

SO CONFUSING!!!!

I do not think I even went thru all this with getting married changing my name. getting divorced changing my name now getting remarried changing my name!!!

i think that will be enough to prove he is the person on birth certificate and passport...

Hey Dawn,

Just wanted to welcome you to the forum....I'm another UK/Orlando

Lisa,

How long have you been going through this process? Every day seems like an eternity...

Welcome Dawn!!

Yes I agree be patient... its tough (and i cannot even file yet!!!) but the wait to be with the one you love is worth it...

If you ever need to vent its a good place to do it

Good luck

~cher

Just a question? Have you filed your petition without first obtaining your final divorce decree? Because I am waiting on mine it will be another month or so and have not filed my petition because of it? Can i file then include it later... and when later?

thanks

Is your divorce final? You can't file your I-129F unless you are legally allowed to marry at the time of filing. If you file before your divorce is final, you will be denied. If, on the other hand, the judgment is final and you're just waiting on the paperwork to get to you, then I suppose you could go ahead and file now. You'll get an RFE requesting the divorce decree, at which time you should have it and can send it in.

Doesn't the term "decree" simply mean "judgment of the court"? Mine doesn't have "decree" on the actual document but it does say "judgment of dissolution".

Yeah, sounds like the same thing.

thanks mox....

it will be final this week but will take a month or so to get the decree... did not know if it was worth filing now getting an RFE

or waiting until i get it and file. I do not know if i am saving us any time by doing it the first way...

I'm still wondering what the "decree" is though. That term is not on my papers anywhere. I asked for a decree at the courthouse and they said this is it...my pile of papers that I fileld out stating who gets what etc that the judge signed.

Does everybody get that or is a decree more of a one page certificate type thing?

Hmmm, pretty sure mine actually says "decree." I'll check it out when I get home.

My divorce decree is similar to yours since I'm also in Cali so I'll go with the copy that the court sent me with the court's stamp. Thanks, mox!

My decree is from Colorado, actually. But probably very similar.

Just a question? Have you filed your petition without first obtaining your final divorce decree? Because I am waiting on mine it will be another month or so and have not filed my petition because of it? Can i file then include it later... and when later?

thanks

YIPPEE!!! Gratzies again in case you missed it in the July thread Soooooooo happy for you both!!

CONGRATUALTIONS!!! YAY FOR JULES & GRIFF !!!

and everyone else ...

:thumbs:

that's right the K-1 needs to be denied before you apply for the I-160 (waiver). You can start on the hardship letter now but you know your fiance needs to write it? It is about hardship to him if he has to go to your country to be with you, if you don't get a visa to the US. They do not want to hear about hardship to the non-US citizen. He has to write and sign it. Also you need evidence (documentation) to support what you say in the hardship letter. It's not a simple application. You have time to research it. I'm doing this process myself. I will be filing it this month. Good luck -

I know its hard... and i know it is really unfair to keep people that are in love apart. I know it feels like you could go crazy...but like everyone said we ALL have to go through it and we all have to bide our time and try to stay sane. I cannot even file yet because of divorce issues that should have been settled a year ago really but because of a spiteful ex who does not want me to be happy, we have to wait much longer.. and its really unfair on us as we have done nothing but follow the rules but due to the wait on my divorce we pretty much used up all his time that he can come visit me ... so we also have to spend many tortured months apart.. but have faith and you will be fine because what is meant to be is meant to be....

Not quite the same situation but, after I left my first husband (but nine months prior to final divorce papers), I changed my surname back to my birth surname by deed poll and also added an additional middle name that I have been known by since I was a child. When Mark asked me to send him documentation I included a certified copy of this deed poll with the other evidence even though my passport, birth certificate, and even my final divorce papers all show my birth surname. The deed poll service is quick, easy, and relatively cheap... and if you don't have any other official record of the change this might be a good back-up to have in-hand. Better to have it and not need it!

What my Fiance is trying to say or ask I believe is....

Should he use his birth surname or the name on all of his relevant papers (passport, bank statements, leases, plane tickets etc..of course excluding his birth certificate) on all of our paperwork for the K1 process and just list His birth surname as other names known?

SHould he have his name officially changed by deed poll (legal way to change name in UK , recognized by all government agencies) would it matter that it was just done know and not when he was little?

What other thing should we include to explain the name change? We thought a notorized letter from his mother saying that David went by his stepfathers last name since age of 5

his doctor that all medical records have been in that name as well

he has nothing with his birth surname except his birth certificate so it seems logically he should use the name he has gone by for the past 29 years. but we do not want a RFE or worse visa refusal......

Thanks....

When I got divorced if I wanted to change back to my maiden name I would have had to fill that portion of the divorce papers in to change it. Also during court they ask if you want to change back to your maiden name. Not sure if it's the same in every state though.

I'm curious what you mean by finalized. Do you mean the official date the court says you are now divorced?

yes , we are currently waiting for our lazy lawyers to prepare the settlement for us to sign then file it with the court... so i know its about a month away or so until i get my divorce decree... there is nothing in there about my name change so i guess i will go with my married name on my passport in all the papers for the K1

Hi all

as I am still waiting for my divorce to finalize should be in about a month... so i will be filing my petition soon YAY i am just getting anxious and want to have the packet all ready to send ( i have all the proof of meeting , passport size photos, letter of intent done now) and just add the info such as divorce date and decree in as i get it

but i have a few questions???

does the date my Fiance signed his g325a matter ? he will be leaving it with me when i see him next week and it may be dated month or so before i send the packet in.

Do I use my legal married name on the paperwork since it is in my passport? even though i go by my maiden name on my checks etc...

thanks

~cher

I would write the date in your fiance's G325a after your divorce is final. It doesn't matter who writes the date.

Use your current legal name. If it is now your maiden name, change your passport.

this may sound stupid but does my name automatically change back to my maiden after my divorce is finalized? I have a hyphenated name anyway and I rather keep like that and then just change it to my fiances when we marry. thanks

Hi all

as I am still waiting for my divorce to finalize should be in about a month... so i will be filing my petition soon YAY i am just getting anxious and want to have the packet all ready to send ( i have all the proof of meeting , passport size photos, letter of intent done now) and just add the info such as divorce date and decree in as i get it

but i have a few questions???

does the date my Fiance signed his g325a matter ? he will be leaving it with me when i see him next week and it may be dated month or so before i send the packet in.

Do I use my legal married name on the paperwork since it is in my passport? even though i go by my maiden name on my checks etc...

thanks

~cher

I went a year and some months without Edi before we were reunited, i even had a baby in the process alone, i dont think i stayed positive more than 20% of the time. But i had work and the newborn and my older child to keep me busy and occupied and of corse talking to edi on the phone or online.

There are no tips to give, its just something you have to basically deal with until everything is said and done. And trust me, VJ will be your best entertainment for the next months to come.

That must have been so tough!!! I cannot even imagine being by myself thru a pregnancy and birth without him here. I commend you on your strength ! obviously I am sure I would be able to do that if need be but like you say I am positive about the situation such a small percentage of time and the rest of the time I spend freaking out that this will take forever... but it will be what it will be and in the end we will be in each others arms and get to spend the rest of our lives together!!!

[/quote

I am very sorry for your loss and no it is not fair you do not have his support when you most need it. I hope all is resolved soon ..take care

Hi missing.him,

First of all, sorry there were some interruptions in a thread meant to give you encourgement. I can tell you that you'll find here many good people that have gone through this test of distance that will be happy to provide support during this process.

Absolutely there will be ups and downs, It's really important that you communicate regularly, and keep your eyes on the prize: the separation is only temporary, but real love lasts forever...and when you are finally reunited, and you know that you've passed this test, and your love is made stronger by it, it's so worth it

Find new ways to surprise each other at a distance: a letter, a text message, flowers, or a small present. Justin used to send me flowers, and it was always a nice surprise.

I know that your fiance can't come to visit you here in the states, but if you can arrange 1 or 2 visits during the process, it really helps the wait.

Good Luck!

Saludos,

Caro

Thanks Caro

I appreciate it. I will feel much better once we can actually file the petition. Yes we can still manage some trips to Canada ( Where i can take my daughter with me) and that will make this process manageable. It is hard but it does make you realize that true love is worth waiting for.....

thanks again

~cher

divorce because of custody issues with my 2 year old. Raising a 2 year old by myself, We use Skype and talk all day long which is nice but not the same....

Whats your kid doing all day while your talking? Your kid should come first.

NEVER SAY MY CHILD DOES NOT COME FIRST!!! i do not take that statement lightly. If you need to know i have a laptop and a webcam and its on all day ...I play with my child and talk to my fiance as does my daughter. My child always comes first , if she did not would i be here in NY with my Fiance in England? I do not go there as I can not take her with me. I have been away from her for a total of 9 days in her 2 1/2 year old life. I work most days from home so i can spend more time with her and I have never even hired a babysitter as I spend all my time with her. So please do not judge someone as not taking care of their child because I stated I talk to my fiance on all day long.

thank you to the others for their support

Congrats for that one! I sent my packet 3 back a few days before you so Im hoping to hear something within the next week!

With regards to not having much notice...I would go tomorow if there was a chance!!!

Good Luck

According to our timelines I sent Packet 3 back four days before you. But I do believe that they were processed at the same time because we've both been eligible for interview since 12th December. Which means you should hear something very soon now.

Gillian

lol i tried changing that cuz i just realised i made a little error, but i have no idea how to edit posts so just left it at that!

Good luck

Well even though we cannot file our petition as of yet (soon!) i hope to still be on this list in about 6 months!!

How do you all stay so positive???

What makes you think we DO?

That was my exact thought..........

I remember having good and bad days. Good and bad moments.

Now that he's here - we have good and bad days - good and bad moments.

It's difficult to explain to those still separated how, in the weirdest way, once you are finally together for good all the separation melts away. It's almost as if it never happened - if you were truly connected to begin with, that is.

The time you are making for each other now - once you are together in real life - it's hard to duplicate that. It really is. My husband and I find ourselves occasionally saying how we desperately don't want to lose that ability to talk to each other. We HAD to talk when we were apart. Once you're together for good, the things you've been longing for - the touches, the constant togetherness - believe it or not they won't hold you together if you forget to communicate.

I guess I've decided that each step of our marriage has different 'sweets' and 'sours'. There is sweetness to the separation because it forces you to talk and learn. The sour is obvious. Once you are together, your challenge will be to not take each other for granted. Just like regular married couples.

Because it is, at the end of the day, real life after all.

Thanks.... everyone it does help so much to know that there are all of you here to talk to when I cannot hold it together some days and vice versa I will be here for anyone else that needs some

Ok so here goes

I love this site first of all because it makes me realize i am not the only one~~ and the info is fantastic!!

I met the love of my life (david) a year ago... its been a rough road with me having a hard time with finalizing a divorce because of custody issues with my 2 year old. looks like that should be done within the next month (fingers crossed)

David and i spent a lot of time together for the last 6+ months. Now he is back in the UK and we are waiting to be able to file our 129f....

We have been away from each other for a month now and i feel like i could lose my mind ( i am sure many of us feel this way), Raising a 2 year old by myself, working, taking care of a home, winter weather in NY (YUCK) ,m some minor but nonetheless medical issues that affect my sleep. IT is awful without Davids daily support here. We use Skype and talk all day long which is nice but not the same....

SO anyway sorry about the rambling vent

BUT I AM TIRED and the process has not even started yet! I am sad for my daughter who misses David and does not understand why he cannot come to see her

How do you all stay so positive???

anyway just wanted to get that off my chest feel better that we are all essentially going through the same thing

misery loves company and all... but i want to keep a on my face!!!!

So i welcome all comments and messages to help keep my mind occupied for the next 8 months or so !!!

Deep breaths, we've all been thru it!

I'm not sure why you say so, but he can come visit.....

http://www.visajourney.com/faq/k1k2visa-application.html#4.6

He has been here 3 times on the VWP and the last time stayed the whole 3 months then when was denied a B2 visa November 26th , was told he would have almost a zero chance to come in under the vwp again...

Happy New Year to you too....... This time next year we will all be with our loved ones....

YES !!! may 2008 be filled with all of our approvals!!!!

Welcome to VJ.

thank you

Ok so here goes

I love this site first of all because it makes me realize i am not the only one~~ and the info is fantastic!!

I met the love of my life (david) a year ago... its been a rough road with me having a hard time with finalizing a divorce because of custody issues with my 2 year old. looks like that should be done within the next month (fingers crossed)

David and i spent a lot of time together for the last 6+ months. Now he is back in the UK and we are waiting to be able to file our 129f....

We have been away from each other for a month now and i feel like i could lose my mind ( i am sure many of us feel this way), Raising a 2 year old by myself, working, taking care of a home, winter weather in NY (YUCK) ,m some minor but nonetheless medical issues that affect my sleep. IT is awful without Davids daily support here. We use Skype and talk all day long which is nice but not the same....

SO anyway sorry about the rambling vent

BUT I AM TIRED and the process has not even started yet! I am sad for my daughter who misses David and does not understand why he cannot come to see her

How do you all stay so positive???

anyway just wanted to get that off my chest feel better that we are all essentially going through the same thing

misery loves company and all... but i want to keep a on my face!!!!

So i welcome all comments and messages to help keep my mind occupied for the next 8 months or so !!!