Silentcloud

Finally, I could send my wife and her kids back to Ukraine. They reached their city in Ukraine safely. The divorce has been filed with the court and may take a couple of months to get the decree. At the time of her leaving she was crying and says she still love me and she is ending the marriage only on paper as I wanted it and want to continue the relationship. She said she is leaving because she hates US lifestyle.

Thanks but I cannot buy the ticket one day before but need to have some lead time to get all the paperwork done. I got the economy ticket for her and her kids 2 weeks out at $770 a piece and she agreed to it. The same ticket was $500+ a few days back but it jumped in price when I bought yesterday but I didn't think twice as it is way less than $6k. Hope everything goes good and she will be back in Ukraine soon and be happy.

Thanks much for sharing your story. I'm presently not interested to have another relationship but time will tell. I had a detailed talk with her yesterday and talked about my financial situation too and she agreed to an economy ticket and I trusted her and bought the tickets yesterday and she signed all the documents today. Sent the scanned copy to my attorney to double check before I ship them to him to file with the court. She still says that I'm a very good person and don't want to lose me and want to continue the long distance relationship as how we did before she came here. She is a good person at heart as well but due to the ego rupture she had been so hard on me. She also said that this divorce is just on paper and our relationship with continue as before. Time will tell.

Sure about getting and also giving and will do as I get settled mentally.

Thanks for the advise but I don't think I can do that. She will not make a U turn as she hates everything about the US compared to Ukraine. Secondly, as my car is broke I cannot drive them to the airport and will book Uber. I'll tell her to send me a message when she gets on the international flight and also after she lands at the destination. Yes, I'm going to get her out ASAP. Yes, I'm using Google flights.

Your post is the highlight for my situation. Thanks much! I'm determined and poised to do just that. Get them out of here ASAP. I cannot get roommates or sub-lease it as per the lease but I'll check the language in the lease again and I'm flexible so a roommate shouldn't burden me too much. I didn't mention about this whole ordeal to neither friends or family as they might stop or make fun of me or think of me as too adventurous/crazy and stop me in the tracks saying that don't date, trust and marry someone international so I maintained it a secret till date. I haven't invited anyone for the wedding. I wanted this to be successful first and then on the first anniversary I thought of telling everyone but now I better let it go to the grave with me. So, now I cannot go to them to discuss the same. I'm very thankful to all the people here who are total strangers supporting me and offering help in their own way. I don't want a thankless person in my life who says I'm the best husband and connection and a great father to her kids one day and the very next day says that I'm a very selfish person and humiliates me. Even after all this I have distaste of her in my mind but still have love for her and the kids in my heart. After 10 years of loneliness I took this step of sharing my life with a Ukrainian woman as what my friend did 5 years ago and is very happy with her. The only difference is that my friend's wife didn't have kids before marriage and have kids now with my friend. He supported her to be a doctor and now she is a practicing Gynecologist. Looking at that them I thought I should do the same i.e marrying an Ukrainian woman but made a mistake of bringing a mother of two and cared for them as my own kids. I always kept my needs way lower than theirs and attended to them first. With all this going on and no one to talk to I was at home locked in my room sulking and hating my fate all of yesterday and the night before. She along with her kids went partying along with the FB friends I helped her to connect on Friday afternoon till late night and then Saturday early AM and till late evening. Don't know how one can be so casual about all this but at least I knew how easy it is for her to break a man emotionally and financially and feel no pinch about it and have fun on the side. At 51 it's very hard to think that I'll stay single and die alone one day and I hope that day comes sooner than later. I definitely need support and I'll look for local men's groups as suggested. For now I'm going to the park and sit there for sometime to get some fresh air. Thanks again to you and to all the people to support a total stranger like me.

Thanks much and will do.

That would be very helpful. Could you please guide me how to find those support groups?

I agree with you 100%.

You maybe right but I feel that it's just on paper that the law works for both genders. The reality is always been looked at that men do cruelty towards women. Even if there are some men who claim and go through VAWA the percentage would be minimal as compared to women claiming the same.

Ok, makes sense how the entire legal works in the favor of women. I'll work towards getting them out of the country ASAP. I think so too and after biting this one I'll not be left with any teeth.

It's not a bit but quite a bit more expensive than AOS. AOS will cost $4000+ and whereas her fancy flight would cost $6000. When neither her nor I ever travel by premium economy I don't understand why she demands such high priced fancy travel tickets. While coming into the country from Frankfurt I have upgraded their travel from economy to premium economy because Condor airlines gave a deal to upgrade for $30 or $50 more hence I did it out of love for them. There are no such deals now and have to pay anywhere between 2 to 2.5 times the cost of the regular ticket if I get lucky. The flight duration to be less than 15hrs and tickets within 1 week will cost a lot more which I just cannot afford.

How does this VAWA (domestic violence) claims work? There is no physical or mental abuse or denying shelter or food or any other necessities. Even after all this today being Friday I'm going to ask her to text me what she needs from the grocery store to bring home. Do you mean fake VAWA claims? If woman is making fake ones does she not prove them in court with evidence? When none of that has ever happened how can her claim stand in the eyes of the court?

I have the same feeling as what you mentioned here. She made me spend all of my savings to get her here and have very little in my bank and wanted to spend that on the AOS. With the recession around the corner there are high chances I might lose my job as a contractor. I have taken this 3 BR independent house paying a huge rent and also bought all the furniture, appliances needed. My lease is till May 2023 and I'll be paying this huge rent in this 3 BR house living just by myself which I really don't need. Paid 6 months rent as deposit and the lease breakage terms are awful. My camry has an engine problem and making pushrod noise and might die at any time. If I spend the little money in the savings on her fancy flight tickets then I just cannot survive the period in the vent of job loss. She just crushed me to near death. I don't travel myself in premium economy and go by regular economy. In her country she travels in non-airconditioned bus or train. She came with iphone 7 and as my mobile carrier rejected to provide service to that old mobile I bought her a brand new iphone 13. 3 days back she said she is the difficult one and I'm a good man, good husband and a good father to her kids. Just because I talked to my lawyer in a locked room she suspects that I'm cooking up something against her. There is nothing like common property, bank accounts, credit cards etc so it's a simple straightforward divorce. I have asked her to wait after filing the divorce till end of Sept just to make sure that the court has no objections to what we have filed and if she needs to sign any document the court might ask later but she wanted to go back urgently and have all these over the top crazy demands. I have communicated to my lawyer and waiting for him to respond. Being good has always punished me big time in this world of opportunists and deceivers. Man has to pay for all the expenses and at the end woman says she is not interested and wants a divorce all the hard earned money spent on the woman are discarded and she will get paid on top of it and man has to cut his losses. Same goes if woman is in man's shoes making the money. It feels that marriage is a curse for me and my likes.

Please find attached what she is demand ing now. She met a lawyer in person and this is what she got. She might have used Ukrainian war victim card and got a lawyer on her side for free. Also, she says that I should write that the agreement will become legal on the day of her travel to Poland. Premium economy ticket within 15hrs of travel from Atlanta will cost anywhere between $1600 - $1800 per person and I have to get 3 tickets. I cannot afford that and I'm afraid I have to go the contested route which will also be expensive. Just a crooked womanbtrying to take advantage of me. What an expensive mistake to get in an international relationship and trust her so much. I'm highly stressed out.