Kotenochek

Hello Everyone, I am amazed you guys are all still here 7 years later:)))

Glad to see you are still happily married!

Things my husband always points out, why he loves me:

-I have no problem admiting if I am wrong and apologizing for it.

-I never give him shitt for working late hours or weekends(Why would I?He is trying to provide for his family).

-I never talk shitt behind his back (Why would I?I chose him!)

-I thank him for his hard work all the time, I really do appreciate it a lot.

-He says I am a great mother, because I refuse to hire a nany and do it all by myself.(btw we had a baby just 5 months ago)

-I cook, but so does he(I am a lucky girl)

Things he complains about:

-I time him in a bathroom lol He takes forever hahaha

-I watch his health and dont let him eat fat italian food

-I ask too many questions at the same time

- I always know when he lies

That being said, in last years we had ups and downs, but i feel very much home now.

I notice more and more, what is wrong with Russians.

For example:Its common to ask personal questions like:"How much does your husband makes?"

My answer:More than yours:D

Hope I didnt make too many typos, sleep deprivation...

Happy for you guys:)Congratulations:)))

Ok,so we applied a week ago and I already received my extension for another year!Wow that was fast! :dance: :dance:

Welcome back!

Sounds like you've been super busy! I hope you'll share some of your stories and adventures when you get the time.

For removal of conditions, as Gary said, just download the form, print it out, and that's about it. Not too much of a process. The Guides section on here can help too. Make sure you come back if you have any questions or anything.

Have been super busy,but in a good way.I am now as independent as I used to be back home so i am happy:)))Still not crazy about the states but at least can enjoy it now:)))It takes 3 years I guess to get used to it.Then I have not been in Russia since last summer,so probably if i went back i would change my mind:)

Working here is not fun:)))People are mean and jealous lol

Maybe I did not have the best experience and hopefully I will also change my mind about this topic..

It all started making sense though after a while:)I kind of figured out the"culture" in some ways started liking it..for example"personal space"one and not discussing personal stuff at work...but still miss my family badly...And nobody wants to move here they have it pretty good back home...

anyway thank you so much for the info i will start filing papers and promise to come back and share more details:)))

Out of topic:)))Krasnodar has so many pretty ladies:)))

I love my American husbandy better than any other men in the whole universe other than my DAd,haha but thats different:))))

Hello Everybody:)))

Time has come for removing conditions...Need some help and advice on it:)))

It is 3 month prior to my 1st one"s expiration.

It has been some interesting adjustment:)Came to husband when he was doing great,crisis hit,we lost our house,he lost his job..I found a job,raised a champion..Eventually we moved to LA husbandy found job again,I went back to school.Life is good:)))We still love each other more than ever and treasure every moment together:)

Ok now let me know how to file papers:)))lol

Thanks! :help: :help: :help:

She is pretty:)))Lucky guy:)Enjoy each other:)))

congratulations:)

Either way write a cover letter with explanation and your story,in my case they read the cover letter and they liked it:)))Good luck to you!

Dear All,

I have a question regarding filing timing.

On my interview,where i received first green card i was told to apply for 2nd one at least 9 month prior the expiration date, due to their overload.

However USCIS page says i must apply within period of last 90 days before my first green card expires.

My question is which one is the right way to do? And how long does the whole process take?

thank you

I do not think i can afford a private school at this economy..Especially in Northern California area..The problem is that i would need school to give me an invitation ,so i apply for her student visa...Or another option is a tourist visa,but then she can stay here only for 3 months right?

Thank you guys for trying to help!

Hey Guys,

I have a question,which probably is not for this forum,but maybe you can help me.

I want to bring here for a few months my niece from Georgia-country,not a state!!!She is 11 years old and is not very good at english.The whole point is to get her into an american school ,so she learns english.

Do you have any experience with getting kids into school without green card or citizenship,but with a student visa?

Also how fast kids get used to english speaking community?

Please,share any knowledge you have about this topic...

Thank you!!!

Congratulations!wish you a very fast visa journey!

I moved to the Usa because at that moment my husband was making very good income...

If I could turn things back I would make us both move to 3rd country.The reason why,is because then both people are in a same position and will understand and support each other better...

Usa has its positive side and then a lot of negative..there is no community support we have in Russia and its hard to live without it,once you have tasted what it is like...

Right now economy in USA sucks and it is very hard to get a job,which makes it extra hard to adjust to a new country...In Moscow situation is way better..People still are switching their jobs to a better ones...

P>S> actually i never asked to lock my thread.whats up?

Ok Guys,first I want to thank you all for trying to give advices:)))You are the best!!!

I am sorry to be away for a while had to work on a relationship...

So .I took all of your advices and started very aggressively search for a job.I asked all people I know to help me...Tomorrow I already have an interview..Hopefully something will come out of this...

I think if I have my full time job and always gone,he will realize what he is missing on and time we spend together will turn into a quality time...

Slim,you are right my husband is a great guy,I just guess this is a 2 year crisis....Just got to live through this and see how it goes...

I also agree with all stuff you wrote there...It is all true!!!!I wish government made it easier on couples to give them more dating time before marriage.It is just crazy to get married within 90 days!

P>S> never meant to say American guys are bad...Just trying to figure out His(AMERICAN) mentality ))

I've actually tried to post some of the "bad" stuff here because I believe the other part of our Visa Journey (The unofficial stuff that doesn't directly deal with visas, immigration, paperwork, etc. - The everyday life stuff.) is just as important, maybe more so, than the visa. My wife wasn't thrilled when I shared some personal details here on the forum but I think it's a great place to get feedback and advice and to also help us realize we're not alone and many of us here are going through similar situations. Sure, we're not all best friends, but we're not really strangers either. Some things we can share because we don't really know each other but other things we try to keep private when really, we should be sharing. I made a good friend through VJ, met in person, and wouldn't feel funny sharing anything with him or his wife. Several others here on the forum I've never met but I'm pretty sure we'd be good buddies too. (On that note, it's time to get a VJ Russia Forum meetup going!) Anyway, we're all going through something, and maybe what you're going through is exactly what someone else needs to hear. So, that's my little plea to everyone to open up a little more. Don't feel like you have to keep everything private. Share!

OK - Kotenochek, from the limited bit of things you've posted about your husband, he seems like a pretty good guy, and what sounds like is happening is just the lull that naturally occurs once the fire and passion and the "newness" of being together wears off and the daily grind sets in. My wife absolutely HATED me for about a year (OK, more like two years) because she expected all those nice things that I did while we were still in the "warming up" stages to continue indefinitely. I'm telling you, as a man, I'm not going to buy flowers all the time. I'm not going to go out of my way to be romantic, all the time. As a matter of fact, now that we've been married for a while, dare I say, I shouldn't have to. - And that's where the problems start.

See, women expect a man to always be that guy. The guy who they fell in love with, the guy who waited out in the rain for two hours, the guy who held their hair while they puked (bad example, but you get the point) the guy who cared about them and asked them how their day was. That nice, wonderful, loving, adoring guy.

Men, on the other hand, expect that she will be that same girl. That girl who didn't care if he went out with his buddies because they'd catch up later. That girl who didn't care if he wore pants with wrinkles in them. That girl who would "surprise him" while he was driving to dinner. That girl who was fun to be around, who didn't care if he wanted to do his own thing, who didn't really make a big deal about anything except spending time together once in a while.

And what happened?

He turned into the guy who stopped trying. Who was unwilling to go the extra mile. The guy who would rather watch TV than give his wife a massage. She turned into the girl who now, instead of saying, "I'll see you later" said, "You better see me now or else there won't be a later." That funky spontaneity was gone, and everything turned all serious!

Why?

Well, short answer is you went from "dating" (and trying to impress upon each other 100% of your good qualities and mutual interests) to "cohabitating" (living together and sharing every single little itty bitty piece and intricate detail of your entire life) and now there's no more room for 100% to be good. Bad things are a part of life, and they have to be dealt with together.

It's hard to do. Especially in cases like ours where you take two adult people who are accustomed to living totally separate lives and then try to mesh them into one, and do it in a hurry. Usually the cohabitating stage can be prolonged before marriage and serious relationships develop over time. She leaves a toothbrush. He has a drawer. She stays over more and more. Then they decide to be together forever. In our cases, we jump in head first then have to sort out who gets which drawer and where our toothbrushes go.

And it's an ongoing process. My wife and I celebrated our second anniversary with a nice dinner and toasted to getting divorced. We seriously were at that point where we just could not stand each other anymore and both of us were ready to throw in the towel. We actually sat there and told each other how pissed off we'd become and then drank to getting it over with. The weird thing is, that was kind of a release for both of us. Once we took that stress off each other, and started doing our own thing, it started working out pretty good. Right now, she's in Florida with a buddy of hers and I'm here at home. Why? Because that's what she wanted to do and I'm glad she's doing something to make herself happy. When she makes herself hapy... I DON'T HAVE TO!!!! When the obligation is gone, and you're free to enjoy yourself, it's a lot more fun to enjoy together.

Men and women are different. The person you married isn't exactly who you thought they'd be, but you do like each other. If you take the stress off of trying to make it work, and just let it naturally work itself out, it will. There are going to be rough spots and things that don't seem all that great, but if you do your own thing and make yourself happy through them, then your partner is free to do so as well. You can't make your partner happy when you're not happy yourself. And really, it's not your job to make your partner happy, it's their job to be happy together with you. If they're not, you can work on it together, but really, it's up to them. Trying to "make them happy" will not only NOT make them happy, but it won't make you happy either. Make yourself happy, and your partner will most likely be happier with you having done so.

There's an interesting video out there, maybe you should watch it. The guy pretty much sums up the interesting dynamic of the difference between what's going on in our brains. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM Watch that video, and see if what's going on in your relationship is really as serious as you think it may be. Or is he just in his "nothing box?"

Keep the stories coming, keep posting them, and everyone, come on! Don't make VJ just about paperwork. The most important part of our Journeys is after the visa!

thank you so much!!!this helped!!!

Hey Guys,

We always write when things are awesome,but never really when they suck...

Recently I have heard many sad stories from my girlfriends that moved here same way( through K1-K3)...

And I should say my own relationship is not at the top of the mountain nowadays"in spite my maid outfits,SLim"...

What is going with American Men?Is it the crisis that makes you guys so insecure or whats up?

Or after 2 years interest is just gone for no reason?

I am not saying I am extra perfect,but I have been there for my husband 1000%,supporting through everything,loving and doing everything possible...However I think now that could be the reason...Maybe when you give it all to Men don't want it anymore?

I know you already were told No,but i confirm it!Because i know how anxious you get about anything little during this process...

My husband proposed to me in Hayat hotel(in California) very unexpected:)

We had a dinner in the restaurant inside hotel,because i liked food there and then he said he is taking me on the roof to show me the view.On the way to the roof he pulled out the key and opened the room,I was like what are you doing?!

but then i saw all room in roses and candles and him on his knee with a ring:)Love him!

Get your social number before applying for marriage,because after marriage your k1 expires and they wont issue you one.In my case we did not know that and i have to wait for work permit to be allowed to drive.so get it as soon as you can and first thing after that on your list should be learning driving!Thats the most important part in USA!

Nobody here believes me when I tell them girls like her are "average Russian girls." (Gorgeous, intelligent, fun.... all pretty normalna for Russkayas, nyet?)

yeah pretty much:))))

congratulations!thats a great news:)

Haha she is cool:))))loved her videos:)She is hot too!