allousa

First of all, I CANNOT believe that I remembered my VJ name or password since it's been forever since I've been on VJ.

Hicham and I married in 2001 and some of you may remember him going home to Morocco to be with his mom and he ended up getting stuck there for 4 years. He finally came home March '08. We went to Maroc for BIL's wedding and Hicham's passport was taken simply because they (USCIS) has his name wrong in their system. Delayed our citizenship process but he finally took his oath in September/October last year, I think. Been a crazy year.

We have a precious 6 year old son and our expecting a little girl in July. Been an amazing journey for both of us and it's not been easy at times, but we've stuck together and are still going strong.

As someone said earlier, I still keep in touch with old VJers via Facebook.

GREAT to see you WoM!!!!! You were such a help to us and it's great to see you are still doing well.

It's been FORRRREEVVVAAHHHHHH since I've been here at VJ! I decided to poke my head over hear since I got to thinking about VJ and saw this thread.

Hicham and I are in the "class of '05", so to speak. Hicham and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary just this February. He has filed for citizenship and we are waiting to go through that last step. *sigh* I just can't believe it.

Our little boy is 5 years old now. Time goes by so quickly.

So glad to see WoM on here! *waves* You were such a great comfort to me many times. Glad to see you doing well.

Also, jpaula! *big wave* You REALLY helped with the whole I-212 process and going through Rome and all that #######. So glad to see that you are doing well too.

I've kept in touch with a few people that went through at the same time and I think they will remain life long friends.

Almost 2 years for me. Been together 4 years.

I'm thinking Allousa and her hubby have been married over 9 years. Forgive me if I'm wrong but I'm almost certain of this.

And you would be right girlie!!!!! 9 years exactly this coming February. Wha

I think Chai has us beat though.

My husband was in AP for a year and a half.....Casa. AND we had the "blond devil lady" too! She actually turned out to be quite nice to my husband once his file was approved.

Sorry sorry this is happening to you.

jPaula's advices is SPOT on. We had to go through the waiver process which you have to prove hardship. I would apply alot of the same principles in your case. We submitted lots of pictures that had both of our families in the same pics. I think that helped alot. We also had letters from both my parents and his. Pile on the evidence hard. You HAVE to not take this personal! Good luck.

What annoys me most about these situations is that the USC refuses to admit that there were warnings well before they got married and well before the SO got here.

Good grief, I saw my husband EVERY DAY for almost a year before we got married and we talked ALOT about his religion, children and all that stuff. Well nine years later, I'm still learning stuff about his culture and religion that I did not know. I'm not saying that you can't find true love by meeting someone on line, because I know that it really does happen. But to not acknowledge meeting someone online, visiting them once or twice, getting married and then bringing them here to the States adds incredible tensions to the mix. Not to mention if there are children from a previous marriage, ex-spouses to deal with and all the pitfalls that can come with adjustment. The reality is that the deck is stacked hard against relationships with these challenges. AGAIN, not saying that they don't or can't work out, but it takes alot of damn work!

Now if soooooooo many of these guys are really only in it for the GC and the USC's never saw a thing coming, the as I've said before, Hollywood is digging in the wrong patch of dirt for Oscar winners!

My husband and I had to endure 4 YEARS apart and I tried to share our story and advice with you and you came back being rude and insulting!

I could offer alot of advice about going through interviews and dealing with lost paperwork or mistakes made by the CO, but you don't want anyone's advice here.

I have found you EQUALLY as rude and insulting as you claim people to be on VJ. I mean telling someone that you hope their interview gets screwed up.....that IS nasty and mean.

There are some WONDERFUL people on this site and some that I will be friends with for a long time to come. It's a shame that your behavior has not allowed you to find the same.

I concur that if this is such a horrible venue for you, move on.

I'm going to be completely honest with you..... from start to finish, it took about 4 years to go through the entire waiver process for my husband. He was in AP for a year and a half. That does NOT mean this will happen to anyone else, but you need to be prepared to wait. The absolutely best thing I did during this time (the first couple of years anyway) was to do some volunteer work with the Red Cross. The second thing was to learn not to check every single day. It will drive you into madness.

Sorry, but I have not looked at your timeline. Is your case still at the CO in your SO's home country? Do you know if the waiver is to be adjudicated in Rome?

I did state in our application for hardship that I am the ONLY child in the family to care for my grandmother and her sister. I did not show any type of facts, but simply stated that I was the only family member to care for them when they no longer could care for themselves and how this would be an extreme hardship if I had to move to another country if my husband was not granted the waiver.

It was a few years ago, but yes, my husband was in AP for about a year and a half. It was never sent back. And yes, we did contact our Congress rep, but they were told my husband was under administrative processing. This was at the CO in his country before the waiver was even sent to Rome for the final decision.

It's definitely worth checking in periodically with your Congress Rep, but there isn't much to do when they tell you that you are in the AP black hole. Hopefully, you are near the end of waiting. Good luck.

I've traveled twice to Morocco with my son, by myself and have never been asked for a letter from my husband. Our son has a U.S. passport as well. Mind you, he has a Muslim name, but again, have NEVER been asked for anything other than his passport.

Some friends mirrored allousa's experience: the father had a conditional GC and took the 1-year-old baby to Morocco on a U.S. passport (both parents had to sign for him to get that). The dad had no trouble whatsoever, but I think he traveled with a notarized letter from his wife just in case anyone asked for it. I don't think anyone ever did.

Absolutely correct! I had to DSL the document for my husband to notarize giving his approval of the issuance of the U.S. Passport and then he had to send the original back. A passport cannot be issued without both parent's consent.

I've traveled twice to Morocco with my son, by myself and have never been asked for a letter from my husband. Our son has a U.S. passport as well. Mind you, he has a Muslim name, but again, have NEVER been asked for anything other than his passport.

I KNOW that "coffee money" and "paying under the table" are par for the course when it comes to how things operate in Morocco, but DEFINITELY not with ANYTHING associated with the Consulate or Embassy office.

My husband would have to pay extra for copies, but was NEVER asked to pay anything under the table.

Also, if I remember correctly, he also HAD to go to one of their approved doctor's.

If the CO asks you for a document....then you submit it.

We would have requests for documents that we KNEW were in the file and sent with the file because we made copies of EVERYTHING that was sent. But there was no argument..... you do what they say.

varba -- you officially rock!!!!!

Well, KF would be please to know that she'll forever be memorialized into Canadian vernacular!

Oh I am. I tried to do the same thing once, but... somehow, I just can't bash on people, even when their situation is different than mine. See, I did things the wrong way, and I admit it. But, I don't go around making myself feel better by picking on them.

I've read post after post of yours making light of your "overstay". Then I saw your post talking about "Oh, well, Canadians have it easy." That was like a big FU to people that don't have it so easy.

For people like me and my husband we suffered horribly for FOUR YEARS because USCIS decided to determine my husband as having overstayed because they hadn't finished processing our I-130 and his student visa ran out while in process. And we have from day one done everything by the letter of the law. I even sold our house to pay for legal help and all of the other expenses due. I'm not feeling a whole lot of sympathy for your situation. And I would caution you to make sure all of your evidence is factual and true because if you find yourself in a situation that you have to file for a waiver because you've been banned. That is a whole other nightmare!

Yes you have come on here admitting what you did, but it's like an Oh well, whatever attitude and because I'm Canadian kind of ####### that leaves people with a bad, bad taste.....especially for me.

Oh Jenn!!!!

What a BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL baby!!!!!! Sending so many wonderful wishes your way! Much health and happiness ALWAYS to you and your family!!!!!!

Lot's of good comments here.

Hicham and I will be married 9 years next year! Whew!!!!! He'll have been home 2 years next March. Even though we lived together for a couple of years before he got stuck in Morocco, we still had an adjustment phase when he came back. And quite honestly, the first year was HELL!!!! Things were different as well since we had a son that changed the dynamics of our relationship.

I can tell a BIG difference now approaching the 2 year mark. We've also had our moments that our relationship was at the breaking point. BUT, we have struggled through trying to communicate better and get better and better at it everyday.

The biggest things that I've learned are that:

1) Language is STILL a barrier. Even though Hicham's English is exceptional, there are still words that he might not understand or that have a different meaning to him. This can result in disagreements, but again, communicate through it.

2) Being away from their family is EXTREMELY difficult. I would venture to say that many MENA SOs are very tight with their family and it's hard to be so far away. Hicham has certain times that he calls his family each week and I make sure he doesn't have interruptions.

3) Don't expect them to know what you want from them. When it comes to housework, jobs....whatever! They can't read your minds. Let them know what your expectations are.

Different things work for different people, this is just what has worked for us!

Good luck to everyone trying to find their way through this journey!

This is the last time that I'm going to take time out of my day to respond to you because you have really PISSED me off.

That was a tad smartelicy to me, and you chalk it up to good advice. All I did was ask a simple question. And some ppl get pissed off because I did not google it on my own. They acuse me of "demanding" people to find it for me and do the work. I do applogize if I work alot, and have not replied with my gratitude... but just bc someone has not been able to reply with gratitude doesn not mean the assiatance was not appreciated. You have know idea whats going on in my life as to why I have not been able to reply back. And if you thought the bullying response was directed towards you then you should look to yourself bc evidently I hit a nerve and you somehow read that and applied it to yourself. I have never demandad anything from anyone.

You know what, you DID hit a nerve! First of all, I haven't said any of that ####### to you! Don't believe so. I have posted in a couple of your numerous "help" threads trying to give you information. If you go back and read the comments in your last thread, did I not point out that SOME people can be nasty, but that SOME people DO offer good advice...and I get the above ####### back from you.

Secondly, you don't know jack ####### about ANYONE on this board, especially me. I've been dealing with immigration a WHOLE LOT longer than you sweets. We started our immigration process in the States in 2001 and were married here. Try being separated from your husband for four years having to file a waiver which is a whole different nightmare. Try giving birth to your child BY YOURSELF! Try losing your father while your husband is overseas. During all this time, these people on VJ provided a lifeline of support for me. They were beyond helpful. Likewise, I have watched many of them go through similar struggles. So you can back the h*ll off with your comments about other people's lives!

I would not be at all surprised if you got similar responses on another site if you continue in the same manner. Then I would suggest you take a look at YOURSELF.

Wow! The she wolf pack is out on the hunt tonight!

I have posted a couple of times to your requests. I can't say that your present comments do much at all in furthering goodwill here.

Really? What about the comments of others? How does that do for the goodwill?

You've said ALOT of things here tonight using a broad brush to sweep everyone together....some of which have NOT made comments to you. YES people can be catty on this board and not nice at times, but you know what, I would consider that you still need to get through this process. If you don't like some people's comments....IGNORE THEM! But if you are looking for additional assistance, I would definitely take into consideration what alot of people are saying to you in regards on HOW to obtain more information and perhaps a little more gratitude to those that do help you so that you can CONTINUE to receive help.

Wow! The she wolf pack is out on the hunt tonight!

I have posted a couple of times to your requests. I can't say that your present comments do much at all in furthering goodwill here.

Usually if I am looking for help..... I say "please" and "thank you".

My katkoot has gone through a couple of different ideas. I was lucky to nab an elephant costume at a consignment sale in his size. It's real cute with this piece that fits on his face where he has a trunk. But when I brought it to him, he absolutely refused to wear it because "Mommy, I only have two legs and elephants have four!" WELL!!!!!!

Next he was CERTAIN that he wanted to be a ghost. We were pretty set on that until my aunt told us that he couldn't be a ghost at her church's Trunk or Treat (no goblins, devils, witches, etc.). WELL!!!!

Luckily, a costume came into her shop that was his size and he seems to like it pretty well....and it's a DRAGON!!!!

Still over how a dragon is okay and not a ghost, but whatever!

The kidlet is just ready to get his pumpkin bucket and lantern and start pilfering the neighborhood for candy!!!!!

If someone deletes me from FB, that is their choice to do so, but that tells me that they aren't interested in being MY friend. So, unless it's a close personal friend whose relationship I don't want to lose, not going to waste my time. I would suspect that alot of people feel that way.

Honestly, if I had deleted everyone on FB because I was angry or having a tough time, I would simply say that FB deleted all my peeps....find me if you want to still be my friend...HA HA LOL! But to come on here and say "Well, I couldn't stand some of ya so I just wiped out everyone", can't say that puts warm fuzzies on my heart.

Just sayin'.....

I believe you are talking about the Consulate's office in Casa, not the Embassy. I know for us, all paperwork was handled out of the Consulate's office. The Embassy is in Rabat.

You cannot walk up to either location without specific paperwork stating that you have reason to be there. I know for Casa, you have to wait in a queue line with a guard who will look at your paperwork before you can even approach the outside window. Casa has definitely become more of a fortress after the bombing in '07.

Casa is fairly responsive to emails. I emailed them several times over the two-three year period we were dealing with them.

You need to email them and get a specific address for picking up the packet. Have him print out the email as confirmation and take it with him.

That's fantastic! All the best in the next stages of your visajourney. They (the next stages) will probably not be so quick and easy. So, gird your loins because once you're back on American soil the USCIS Immigration Officers will probably give ya hell!

Good luck!

Why would you say that? Why would they give them hell?

To the OP, glad that you had an easy time with the process. Sorry that happy stories are not as welcome here as much as drama filled negative posts.

Seriously??? I'm pretty sure you participated in the thread where we were posting good stories and it was all rainbows and unicorns.

When I read a post like this....I do find it rather like a big FU seeing as my husband was in A/P for a year and half alone! We were separated for 4 years going through a waiver process that could have been prevented if our then attorney had been doing his job!!!!

I can definitely see it as hurtful to those that are and have experienced LONG processing times.