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TonyMichael

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  1. Wait, you mean I should divorce now and file it with a waiver, is a better choice??
  2. I'm seriously at a loss what to do as even attornies with good reputation still give me shady or sketchy advice. If the i751 cases only took 6 months or so, I might be able to stay married butivinf in California with all this pandemic, its gonna take 1.5 to 2 years. There's no way I can stay married for that long. It's not healthy for both me and my spouse. So I'm thinking about applying jointly for the time being because my Gc will expire in less than 2 months and I dont have time for divorce, and in a few months divorcing my spouse, and I'll submit the receipt or proof of it to USCIS with a letter explaining the divorce process has begun. Then as soon as I get a decree I'll send it again. What do you think?
  3. I just remembered another thing one of the attornies told me. She said I should stay married for now because we are in the middle of collecting documents for i751 and it's not a good idea to add more stress by going with divorce right now and doing a waiver option. She said (as long as my spouse is willing to wait to divorce) that I should stay married, and go to marriage counseling and get receipts of them. According to her, since joint bank account is not a good option for us, it's better to collect the counseling records as we see a divorce in the future. Divorce cases are almost 100% interviewed, she said, and having proofs of us having been to counseling will help A LOT as it shows that we tried to save our marriage, which shows the bonafide-ness. Also, she said somehow collect the proof of my spouse's cheating, or I should write a letter explaining the cheating incidents, have my spouse sign it with notary public. She said I could use that as one of the proofs that we tried to save the marriage by me forgiving him. I'm not sure if this is a good idea, what do you think?
  4. Thanks for the reply. Actually, I tried speaking to 4 other attorneys. Surprisingly, one of them told me to divorce RIGHT NOW before my GC expires within 2 months. She said I should get a paper proof from the court that the divorce paper has been submitted, and i should submit it with the WAIVER i751 packet. Since we live in CA, where divorce takes 6 months, I wont get my divorce finalized until later, and I wont get a divorce decree until then. So she said for now just do it as a waiver, but include a letter explaining the divorce process has begun, and include the proof of it. The rest of the 3 told me basically the same thing as my current attorney: For now, stay married and submit the i751 packet as joint. And then they told me I should go for as long as possible until I really have to divorce. Until them, they advised me to keep collecting more documents. During which time, there might not be anything new, but like it will still add the longer length of living together, which they said would help. They didnt tell me to "hide" the separation though, but they didnt tell me to "be open about it" either. They basically said just submit everything I have except for bank statements. One attorney said my bank statements not only show that we were separated but also, since I was mainly the only person putting money in it and my spouse spending it, it doesnt really look like "commingling of finances" and hence it doesnt show much evidence of bona fide ness. He told me to collect as much other stuff as possible. Even small things like receipts of when we purchased rings, or for when we ate a dinner at a restaurant on our anniversary. He also said I should get more affidavits. What all attornies I spoke with agreed with, though, was that even though not submitting a joint bank account is a big deal, they did say there are lots of couples who didnt have a joint bank account and still got approved. Some attornies said I should include a letter just briefly mentioning that my spouse and I dont really share the same bank account due to the spending habit difference. To my surprise, attornies (even the one I have been using) I have picked were all rated very high with so many reviews. I know that doesnt always mean the attorney is great, but that was the only thing I could count on at this moment to find an attorney. Talking to these attornies have now made me even more confused what to do...
  5. Let me edit and fix the timeline a little bit. November 2013: Met for the first time and started dating & relationship June 2016: Not married yet, but started living in the same place March 2017: Got married. I moved out of the state for my job at the end of March. My spouse remained where we lived because he had a good job. May 2017: The beginning of May 2017, my spouse quit his job and moved in to my new apt in the different state. Started living together again. October 2018: Got my conditional GC December 2018: The end of December, my spouse cheated on me (He cheated on me twice previously, but I forgave him because I was so in love. But this cheating devastated me to the point that I want some distance from him. But due to our jobs and location, we remained in the same address, but we were not intimate and happy) April 2019 - September 2019: Married but separated (In January 2019, my spouse got fired, and in February 2019 I got fired. So we decided to move out of the state. We actually moved at the end of March 2019. From April 2019, I started living at my friend's while I look for a new job, and my husband started living at his family's place. 3 hours away.) October 2019 - February 2020: Married living together (I signed the lease for both of us because I thought we should try again to see if we can be happy together. I moved in to a new address in mid September, and he moved in with me a few weeks later) February 2020 - June 2020: Married but separated (At first his family's health issue got worsen, and my spouse visited them, but with coronavirus pandemic and stuff, he did not come back for a while. For about 4 months, we were living in different addresses.) June 2020 - Present: Married and living together (But recently I found out he is cheating AGAIN (the 4th time) and I am exhausted and want to divorce already as I don't see any more happy, faithful marriage for us, but my attorney said I should remain married for as long as I can so I can collect more documents in the meantime while the case is pending once we submit I751 packet.) My lawyer said we might be able to "hide" the separation if we don't submit the joint bank account.
  6. November 2013: Met for the first time and start dating, relationship June 2016: Not married yet, but started living in the same place March 2017: Married living together October 2018: Got my conditional GC April 2019 - September 2019: Married but separated (Not officially, but we were living in different addresses) October 2019 - February 2020: Married living together February 2020 - June 2020: Married but separated (At first his family's health issue got worsen, and my spouse visited them, but with coronavirus pandemic and stuff, he did not come back for a while. For about 4 months, we were living in different addresses.) June 2020 - Present: Married and living together (But recently I found out he is cheating AGAIN (the 4th time) and I am exhausted and want to divorce already, but my attorney said I should remain married for as long as I can so I can collect more documents in the meantime while the case is pending once we submit I751 packet) And here is my spouse's employment history after I got my conditional GC. October 2018 - January 2019: Employed January 2019 - October 2019: Unemployed October 2019 - November 2019: Employed November 2019 - August 2020: Unemployed As you can see, my spouse was unemployed most of the time after I got my GC, so we never really got a chance to commingle our fiances because it is mostly me providing for my spouse. And he has a overspending habit, so I didnt wanna put, for example, $100, in our joint bank account, because he would use it. So I put in $10-30 every few days more like as allowance, and I paid all the bills from my own checking account. I have many pics throughout the relationship, and most of the basic stuff people submit as bona-fide marriage evidence, EXCEPT good joint bank accounts. We have a joint checking account where he is the main spender, and me provider. And the problem is, the bank statement will show that he was not with me during the separated months because they show that he was spending money in a different address from where we currently live. Also, even when we were separated, I was visiting him once a month because we did miss each other. It is just that we (well, mainly me because he cheated on me) were not sure if we should live together. My lawyer, btw, is against mentioning anything about me being separated from my spouse. Even though we are back together and living together in the same address, it doesn't change the fact that we were living in different addresses for a long time. And my lawyer say that it is a big red flag that we were not living together, and he even said I should have divorced at that time. Getting back together now, ironically, makes the I751 approval more difficult. I don't know what to do anymore, and every day I am stressed out thinking I will most likely get deported.
  7. I'm more and more frightened now because of (possibly) little things. Unfortunately, my husband doesnt drive and he only has a ID, and I have a drivers license but they show a different address because he got his ID when he was visiting his family for a few months. Now, we both live together. I changed both of our addresses to our current address in DMV website a few weeks ago, but on the actual cards we have, they show different addresses. After he cheated on me multiple times, we were temporarily separated to see if we actually want to be together. That's when he got his ID. Then we decided to get back together and start living together. During that time, he was jobless. So our joint bank account looks like I put money in so he can spend and it comes from my then address, and he spends it in another address. That's another reason I am frightened. Is separation like that (about half a year) fatal factor for I751? Or can I explain this in a letter? In addition to the list I mentioned, I'm going to add: -Mails addressed to both of us individually (but show the same address) -Mails addressed to both of us together -phone line together -receipts for the rings and some more from our dates -plane tickets, movie tickets, theme park tickets etc -photos from BEFORE the marriage (I decided to include them as supporting documents because it at least can show that we just didnt meet and got married right away. Instead we actually spent a lot of time together before marriage) I cant think of any more.
  8. We actually do have a joint checking account we opened a few months after I got my conditional green card. But that's around the time my spouse got fired from his job, and he hasn't worked ever since. So of course he didnt put money in the joint checking account because he didnt have money to begin with. Also I have paid all the bills by myself, because he has no income. So I have been just paying everything from my own checking account. The joint checking account does exist, but there's not much transaction. I put 10-15 every few days and he spends it on his stuff from it. So the transactions are thereoften, but it's not like we are both putting money in it and using it together. But this is because like I said, he didnt have income. Should I still submit all the statements?
  9. Can you please tell me why our evidence is not strong enough? Is that because we are lacking joint bank account, morgage/loan?
  10. Does USCIS mainly only consider the evidence of marriage you collected AFTER you got your conditional GC? Dont they consider the whole length of marriage, or before the marriage when it was just a relationship? My husband and I were in a relationship for 3+ years before marriage and we have lots of pics, text etc together. And we got married, and it has been over 3.5 years. I didnt get my conditional GC until 1.5 years into my marriage. So all together we will have been together for almost 7 years in a few months, but does USICS only want to consider the past 2 years of marriage after I got my conditional GC? I hoped they would consider the entire length of the relationship, because the longer a relationship the better it looks compared to a relationship that ended in marriage after 6 months or so, for example. 1) joint lease (all Bills are included in the rent, so we dont have separate bills for utlities) 2) mails to our address 3) my company life insurance covering both 4) dental insurance covering both 5) vision insurance covering both 6) health insurance covering both 7) my 401k with him as the beneficiary 😎 joint tax returns past 3 years 9) pics and texts over the past 7 years of relationship and marriage (me, my spouse, and his family. Unfortunately my family doesnt know I'm married because of my sexuality) 10) affidavits from my mother in law and my best friend 11) my car insurance with him as the beneficiary This is the evidence I can provide. My lawyer said this is "too little".
  11. No, we have not filed i751 yet. I am collecting documents. I have always known that he is an overspender when we were in a relationship. Of course it would bother me to some extent that he is not a good saver, but it didnt stop me from falling for him. Because you know, you dont marry someone for money. I honestly didnt care that he has a bad spending habit. I always felt that if we get married, we can just keep our finances separate. The problem here was not money, but his multiple adultery. But USCS places a huge importance on financial commingling, and that's why I am frightened. I also think that I should divorce without waiting. But for now, I have to apply jointly because I have about a month left before my GC expiration and our divorce will take st least 6 months because we live in california. So I will need to switch to divorce waiver later.
  12. I already paid some good amount of money to my lawyer, and I already signed the contract.. I am not sure if I should let my money go to waste... I don't have joint account with my spouse because of the very different spending habits. I mean, we do have a joint checking account, but it has been mainly I put little money every time and my spouse uses it because he has been jobless for 1.5 years, and he has had no income. But I dont put money in it for bills and stuff because my spouse would spend whatever available money on alcohol, weed etc. Thats why we have always kept our finances separate. I have paid all the bills for both of us from my own checking account. The joint checking account was used more for me giving my spouse some allowance (little amount) every few days. Even if he had a job, we both know our spending habit is very different where I save every penny and he lives paycheck to paycheck because he wants to spend his money on the stuff I mentioned above. And my lawyer told me he would NOT include a letter explaining all this at the time of I751 application because front-loading all these letters might make it look suspicious or look like we are trying to cover something up. So he said this kind of letter should be included if we get an RFE. What do you all think? I feel like a letter explaining why we don't have joint finances is not too much or suspicous.
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