cajunasian

NO/NO I guess if Bush is an Idiot, Blair must be a fool!!!

I AM S REDNECK AND PROUD OF IT LOL!!!!! Ok, friends called so I need to drive my new SUV to park so we can play horseshoes!!!!

Tracy - BEAUTIFUL

I am a longgggggggggggggggggg way from the getting any hearts. Of course people at work have called me "heartless"

they like their high tech rabbit

Keep going, going, going!!!!!!

I enter Tracy's name....... 16 lb baby boy and the Father is.......... Janet Reno #######!!!!!!!

Janet Reno

Oh please girlfriend, how could you? Have you no standards? Have you lost your mind? Have you had second thoughts, feelings of shame, or an STD test?

Oh right, now instead of buying Diamonds or flowers us guys can just buy a plasma TV!!!!!!

NEW YORK - Is a plasma TV a girl's new best friend?

An Oxygen Network survey released Tuesday found that more than three out of four women said they'd choose the TV over a diamond solitaire necklace. Women preferred a top-of-the-line cellphone to designer shoes by a similar margin. And a little white iPod narrowly trumped a little black dress.

These are among the results of the Girls Gone Wired survey by market researcher TRU for Oxygen. TRU surveyed 1,400 women and 700 men 15 to 49 years old to compare tech attitudes among the sexes.

The findings suggest advertisers need to address a broad audience and not talk down to women. Advertisers are best served communicating lifestyle benefits of tech products by showing what's useful about them, rather than focusing on specifications, Oxygen says.

"There have been some missed opportunities to market consumer electronics to women," says Steve Koenig, senior manager of industry analysis for the Consumer Electronics Association, whose research reveals only subtle differences between the sexes in their attitudes toward technology.

In the Oxygen survey, 59% of women agreed with the statement "Women are much more tech savvy than they give themselves credit for." Among the men, just 38% agreed.

"Men and women are equally competent in the technology arena," says Oxygen CEO Geraldine Laybourne.

Katie Richardson, 25, a project manager for an elevator company in Chicago, says family members come to her for help setting up iTunes or fixing a digital camera. "I love figuring out all the different functions," she says.

Still, just 35% of women agreed that "most of the time people rely on me for technology help," vs. 54% of men.

However tech-savvy they are, women are typically the decision makers when it comes to buying.

"From every piece of data we've seen, by and large, household budgets are controlled by women," says Randy Komisar, a partner at Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers, a prominent venture-capital investment firm. But they are "far more oriented toward solutions rather than tools."

Kristen McDonnell, CEO of LimeLife, a producer of mobile content for women 15 to 35, agrees. "Women are power users of the Internet now in terms of MySpace pages, e-commerce and photo sharing."

New York City College of Technology radiology student Shavonn Tatum, 26, is passionate about gadgets. "I love technology and can't wait to graduate so I can buy things I really want," she says.

hmmmmmmmmm

You Are 54% Evil

You are evil, but you haven't yet mastered the dark side.

Fear not though - you are on your way to world domination.

hmmmm, i guess i need to work on been more evil1!!!!

The Internet. Tracy's brother works for a radio station in Cagayan De Oro, so she gave me the URL so I could listern to his show live and got to hear my, future daughter, Vivian and her school friends singing on the radio!!!!!

Some people can't handle any amount of money. They spend for today and don't think about tomorrow. Look at people who have won the lotteries. Most of them are bankruptcy with than 4 years after winning. Hell just look at some of the people who live here in my hometown of New Orleans, they spend money on beer, strip clubs, drugs, handbags and etc. knowing they didn't have a place to live or food to eat.

First, did you contact the bank and informed them to stop payment on this electronic withdrawal?You must remember this is a computer taking to another computer. Most companies will use a clearinghouse to handle electronic withdrawal and it can take 30 to 90 days before they will stop the electronic withdrawal.

From the banks point of view,how many wtihdrawals did this company make? Bank will not start withdrawaing of money from an account beacause someone send a letter to them.For this company to have started withdrawal of money from this account, someone had to gave them the route and account number. Most companies will also require a void check or deposit slip. After the first withdrawal on this account and the main account holder did not inquiry about the withdrawal, the bank assume this is a pre authorized transfer. Some many people are now are using electronic withdrawal for credit cards payments, bills, car payments and etc. I have work for a bank for 10 years now. I tell everyone, freinds and family, CHECK YOUR ACCOUNT AT LEAST 3 TIMES A WEEK.

We ended up getting the money back that time, I am now looking more for prevention in the future. You said 30 to 90 days before they stop the electronic withdrawal. Does that mean before they stop it from happening again, or the initial withdrawal? Do you know why it takes so long? In this world of instant access that seems crazy to me...

It depends on the company. Like I said some company use a clearing house and some have in house to handle electronic withdrawals. Example, let say you have a alarm system with xyz alarm company. You approve xyz alarm company to take out $20 a month. After 5 or 6 month you decide you no longer want to use their services. You call them, by the way always send a letter and keep a copy stating you no longer want them to take money out of your account. XYZ alarm company send a memo to their in house people, usually account receivable, to tell them you no longer what to use their service. Honestly this memo will probably sit on someone desk for 3 to 4 days or longer before they act on it. If XYZ,has people in house to handle electronic withdrawals, they will send a memo to the in house people to stop on the next billing cycle. If XYZ doesn't have in house people but they will send a request to the clearing house to stop withdrawal from your account. This can take anywhere for 15 to 30 days before the clearing house removes your account number for their data base of electronic withdrawal.

First, did you contact the bank and informed them to stop payment on this electronic withdrawal?You must remember this is a computer taking to another computer. Most companies will use a clearinghouse to handle electronic withdrawal and it can take 30 to 90 days before they will stop the electronic withdrawal.

From the banks point of view,how many wtihdrawals did this company make? Bank will not start withdrawaing of money from an account beacause someone send a letter to them.For this company to have started withdrawal of money from this account, someone had to gave them the route and account number. Most companies will also require a void check or deposit slip. After the first withdrawal on this account and the main account holder did not inquiry about the withdrawal, the bank assume this is a pre authorized transfer. Some many people are now are using electronic withdrawal for credit cards payments, bills, car payments and etc. I have work for a bank for 10 years now. I tell everyone, freinds and family, CHECK YOUR ACCOUNT AT LEAST 3 TIMES A WEEK.

[. Does anyone know if he can take a HIV test here is USA? The reason for this, if he take this test here our company insurance will paid for it.

We paid about $15 for both HIV tests very affordable right?? and when we went to the City Hall they gave us an specifical place to go for the exams. San Isidro district.

Vi

Vi thanks for infor. I guess my friend and I was thinking the aids test would be $150 to $300 a person. That is the reason he ask about doing the test here in America but for $15 for both test is very affordable.

Hey

Just want to thank you for their advice to my friend. He told that they have decide to have both ceremonies in Peru. He will be flying to Chimbote next week for a couple of days to start the process. At least them getting married in Peru, Tracy, my fiancee can fly from Manila for the wedding.

One more question for your guys, my friend know both of them will have to take a HIV (aids) test before getting the green light for wedding. Does anyone know if he can take a HIV test here is USA? The reason for this, if he take this test here our company insurance will paid for it.

Again thanks for the help.

does he want to live in peru?

because if not and they marry in peru, then they have to file a k3 visa for her to come to the us. expect that to take around a year before she can come to the US to be with him.

otherwise, file a k1 fiancee visa and have a "religious" ceremony in peru and then have the "civil" ceremony in the US. this will fulfill her need for a wedding in peru and the legal requirements so that they can be together in the US.

Hi Gtigiant,

They are planning on living here in America after she receive her visa. How difficult is it to have a "religious" ceremony in Peru? My friend talked to his future wife this morning and she is going to inquire about the paperwork than will need for the marriage. We search the Peru Embassy and USA Embassy in Peru web site this morning and could not find anything about marriage in Peru. Thanks for the advice.

I need some help for a friend. He have been to Chimbote Peru several times over the last 2 years to visit his girlfriend. On the last trip he ask her to married him and she said yes. His now fiance want the wedding to be held in Chimbote. He did some research on the web and from the information he found, there is lots of "red tape" they must go through.The information did not tell him what kinds of papers he would need. The information said to check with the local government in her city because each city in Peru had different laws about marriage to a American. I told him I was ask on this forum if anyone has married in Peru and how hard was it to get married there.

HMMMMM, going to have to keep this is mind for the next time Tracy and I have a fight lol

I was flying from Houston to New Orleans this weekend and heard this:

Man who asked the counter clerk at the airport , "How do I know Which plane to get on?"

Ticket agency:"What exactly do you meant ?"

Man replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them.

Oil Changing Instructions for Women:

1. Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3,000 since the last oil change.

2. Drink a cup of coffee.

3. 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle.

Money spent:

$20.00 for oil change

$1.00 for coffee.

TOTAL: $21.00

Oil Change Instructions for Men:

1. Go to store, spend $50.00 for oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree.

2. Get home to discover that the used oil container is full.

3. Instead of taking it to local repair garage for recycling, dump in hole in back yard.

4. Open a beer and drink it.

5. Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.

6. Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.

7. In frustration, open another beer and drink it.

8. Place drain pan under engine.

9. Look for 9/16th box end wrench.

10. give up and use crescent wrench.

11. Unscrew drain plug.

12. Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil ; get hot oil on you in process.

13. Clean up mess.

14. Have another beer while watching oil drain.

15. Look for oil filter wrench.

16. Give up; poke oil filter with screwdriver and twist off.

17. Beer.

18. Buddy shows up; finish case of beer with him. Finish oil change tomorrow.

19. Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.

20. Throw kitty litter on oil spilled during step 18.

21. Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.

22. Walk to 7 Eleven; buy beer.

23. Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat of oil to gasket surface.

24. Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.

25. Remember drain plug from step 11.

26. Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.

27. Discover that the used oil is buried in a hole in the back yard, along with drain plug.

28. Drink Beer.

29. Uncover hole and sift for drain plug.

30. Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor.

31. Drink beer.

32. Slip with wrench tightening drain plug and bang knuckles on frame.

33. Bang head on floor boards in reaction to step 31.

34. Begin cussing a fit.

35. Throw wrench.

36. Swear 10 minutes because wrench hit Miss July (1992) in her overabundant chest.

36. Beer.

37. Clean up hands and forehead and bandage as required to stop blood flow.

38. Beer.

39. Beer.

40. Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.

41. Beer.

42. Lower car from jack stands.

43. Accidentally crush one of the jack stands.

44. Move car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during step 23.

45. Beer

46. Test drive car.

47. Get pulled over; arrested for driving under the influence.

48. Car gets impounded.

49. Make bail: Get car from impound yard.

Money spent:

$50.00 parts

$25.00 Beer

$75.00 replacement set of jack stands

$1,000.00 Bail

$200.00 Impound and towing fee

TOTAL: $1,350.00

Who is the golfer and who is the caddy?

People in the airline industry aren't all serious...

1. On a Continental Flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude And will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants."

2. Heard on a Southwest Airline flight. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing and if You can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."

3. On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have."

4. "There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane"

5. "Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."

6. As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Ronald Reagan, alone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!"

7. After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."

8. From a Southwest Airlines employee: "Welcome aboard Southwest flight 245 to Tampa. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised."

9. "In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite."

10. Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines."

11. "Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."

12. "As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses."

13. And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Delta Airlines is pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!"

14. Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was Quite a bump, and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt."

15. Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the flight attendant said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!"

16. Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: "We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal."

17. An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline." He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Why, no,Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or Were we shot down?"

18. After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the attendant came on the horn, " Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Capt. Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal."

19. Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we Hope you'll think of US Airways."

20. A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude the Captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to flight number 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax... OH, MY GOD! Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I Scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!"

The Real Man Test

1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire Earth. You decide to:

A. Present it to the President of the United States.

B. Present it to the Secretary General of the United Nations.

C. Take it apart.

2. As you grow older, what lost quality of your youthful life do you miss the most?

A. Innocence.

B. Idealism.

C. Cherry bombs.

3. When is it okay to kiss another male?

A. When you wish to display simple and pure affection without regard for narrow-minded social conventions.

B. When he is the pope. (Not on the lips.)

C. When he is your brother and you are Al Pacino and this is the only really sportsmanlike way to let him know that, for business reasons, you have to have him killed.

4. What about hugging another male?

A. If he’s your father and at least one of you has a fatal disease.

B. If you’re performing the Heimlich maneuver. (And even in this case, you should repeatedly shout: "I am just dislodging food trapped in this male’s trachea! I am not in any way aroused!"

C. If you’re a professional baseball player and a teammate hits a home run to win the World Series, you may hug him provided that:

1. He is legally within the base path,

2. Both of you are wearing protective cups, and

3. You also pound him fraternally with your fist hard enough to cause fractures.

5. Complete this sentence: A funeral is a good time to...

A. ...remember the deceased and console his loved ones.

B. ...reflect upon the fleeting transience of earthly life.

C. ...tell the joke about the guy who has Alzheimer’s disease and cancer.

6. In your opinion, the ideal pet is:

A. A cat.

B. A dog.

C. A dog that eats cats.

7. You have been seeing a woman for several years. She is attractive and intelligent, and you always enjoy being with her. One leisurely Sunday afternoon the two of you are taking it easy-you’re watching a football game; she’s reading the papers-when she suddenly, out of the clear blue sky, tells you that she thinks she really loves you, but she can no longer bear the uncertainty of not knowing where your relationship is going. She says she’s not asking whether you want to get married; only whether you believe that you have some kind of future together. What do you say?

A. That you sincerely believe the two of you do have a future, but you don’t want to rush it.

B. That although you also have strong feelings for her, you cannot honestly say that you’ll be ready anytime soon to make a lasting commitment, and you don’t want to hurt her by holding out false hope.

C. That you cannot believe the Jets called a draw play on third and seventeen.

8. Okay, so you have decided that you truly love a woman and you want to spend the rest of your life with her - sharing the joys and the sorrows, the triumphs and the tragedies, and all the adventures and opportunities that the world has to offer, come what may. How do you tell her?

A. You take her to a nice restaurant and tell her after dinner.

B. You take her for a walk on a moonlit beach, and you say her name, and when she turns to you, with the sea breeze blowing her hair and the stars in her eyes, you tell her.

C. Tell her what?

9. One weekday morning your wife wakes up feeling ill and asks you to get your three children ready for school. Your first question to her is:

A. "Do they need to eat or anything?"

B. "They’re in school already?"

C. "There are three of them?"

10. When is it okay to throw away a set of veteran underwear?

A. When it has turned the color of a dead whale and developed new holes so large that you’re not sure which ones were originally intended for your legs.

B. When it is down to eight loosely connected underwear molecules and has to be handled with tweezers.

C. It is never okay to throw away veteran underwear. A real guy checks the garbage regularly in case somebody-and we are not naming names, but this would be his wife-is quietly trying to discard his underwear, which she is frankly jealous of, because the guy seems to have a more intimate relationship with it than with her.

11. What, in your opinion, is the most reasonable explanation for the fact that Moses led the Israelites all over the place for forty years before they finally got to the Promised Land?

A. He was being tested.

B. He wanted them to really appreciate the Promised Land when they finally got there.

C. He refused to ask for directions.

12. What is the human race’s single greatest achievement?

A. Democracy.

B. Religion.

C. Remote control.

How to Score...

Give yourself one point for every time you picked answer "C."

A real guy would score at least 10 on this test.

Give yourself a bonus 5 points for knowing the Alzheimer’s joke.

After a 2 year study, the National Science Foundation announced the following results on the American Male's recreational preferences:

1. The sport of choice for unemployed or incarcerated people is: basketball

2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is: bowling.

3. The sport of choice for blue-collar workers is: football.

4. The sport of choice for supervisors is: baseball.

5. The sport of choice for middle management is: tennis.

6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is: golf.

Conclusion: The higher you rise in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.

Welcome to VJ