Griffon76

Thanks for the information all! I understand that not all relationships are going to work out and I wish we had allowed more time to get to know each other. I would not enter into the divorce decision without much thought and the fact that we stayed married but separate for twice as long as required by law, we know that it's the right thing to do. We found out that some core values were not important to the other and will walk away with some very valuable lessons. I can only look forward to the future and what it holds for the both of us, hopefully successful and happy lives!

LDora,

I had to reply here as I grew up in the Tampa/StPete area. Yes! Driving in this area can be a little daunting. I moved to a rural area of Virginia and had to learn to slow down LOL But one word of encouragement, learning to drive there will heighten your senses and probably help you become a great defensive driver, always aware of your surroundings. Too many people become comfortable with the other drivers around them (especially from more laid back areas) and can get into hairy situations. Good Luck!!!

It's with a heavy heart that I am writing here with this subject instead of questions about moving forward with citizenship with my Canadian spouse. We have pursued divorce (separated for over a year) and he has decided to move back home since family and friends are all there. Has anyone here have experience or know of any instance where the Canadian spouse moved back and is there anything paperwise that he needs to do before crossing back over the border? He does have an updated passport, we got so far as getting the green card but didn't file to remove conditions. Any advice will be appreciated.

Dawn

accomplishment is the beginning of love.

when you accomplish things, your respect yourself. when you respect yourself, you will love yourself.

when someone sees that you are accomplished, respect and love yourself, they will also.

by learning how and why to love yourself you learn how and why to love another.

accept nothing less than an equal in this process.

No one could have said it better than that!

I thank American women for taking care of the kids even as she has a career just as demanding as her husband.

I thank American women for taking care of the kids after divorcing even as she has a career just as demanding as her ex-husband.

I'm ashamed of American men who say "I want custody of my kids" on the way out the front door only to return to pick up the kids every other weekend. (I advocate joint custody, 1 week with mom and 1 week with dad and no support payments... gives mom a life... gives the kids a real dad.)

I'm ashamed of America men who leave their first family only to start a second family and then fall short with time and financial support because of the second family.

Okay, some American men might jump on me for they didn't do this or haven't done it yet (way to go!!!). I think the statistics concerning this issue are in my favor, however.

There is a lot of negative that could be said about both American men and American women - the above negative is what disturbs me the most about America men or any other man in the world. Even in the face of divorce, kids that you created should always be primary in one's life, put above everything else for they are our future. Kids need more than every other weekend from their father.

Again, thanks to American women and women all over the world for taking care of our children.

Bless you for writing this....it's men like you (I'm assuming) that I respect very much for your priorities are in the right place (children) and have respect for the working mom. Again I'm assuming this but you probably have a great mother!

hugs to you Griffon.. thank you for sharing your story and you are taking steps that will lead to your freedom.. good for you. Keep on surrounding yourself with people who encourage you to take care of you and who will support you once this guy is gone. Take some time for healing.. and by time I mean months, years.. however long it takes to find yourself again and to be healthy..

So much of your story reminds me of my previous marriage, it took me time to get out.. but I did get out.. that's the thing that matters.. do what you are comfortable with, live without regrets.. that is the one thing that helps me sleep at night, and gave me peace of mind as I walked away from my previous marriage.

Thanks for your kind words! I'm not delusional to think that I will find THE 'perfect man' but I know one will come into my life that is perfect for me. I'm not in any rush and am happy to have a good job, wonderful kids, fulfilling hobby, great family and friends. I thought I had learned what I wanted from my first marriage (my children's father) and hurt for 16 years waiting for that man to come to his senses and just love me. We went through counseling and it was determined that he was more important than any thing or any one else and I knew it was time to let go. (he is now engaged to a sweet lady but is doing the same thing to her as he did me-poor girl) I will always shed a tear for the dreams I had for that relationship, wanting to really spend the rest of my life with one man, but I let my wants and hurts lead me to a man that was loving and affectionate but had nothing else! And I think it was too soon after the first marriage ended. (and I did NOT go searching for anyone) I am confident that I will be happy alone until I meet someone who will be my best friend, confidant and lover for the rest of my days....I won't go through this again!

That's tough love. He needs it as soon as possible. You need to be free of his mess.

It's being worked on as we speak...also, I don't believe my soon-to-be-ex is asking for anything other than money for the house. He has some nice belongings that he will take with him too as I don't want any of it. He actually told me, "whatever is decided is fine, I don't care". The attorney had me write all assets and debt and agreed that what I came up with was fair. From what I've seen of his life, the 'I don't care" attitude is what has him in this predicament. The 'talk' I gave him the other day, hopefully helped him to start the change to better his life.....starting by getting a da** job!!

You brought him over here, and you said you saw the signs. So that means you accepted it.

There is a saying, Dance with the one you brought to the party.

The signs I saw were before we even started talking online, believe it or not! We were members of an internet classic rock group and listened to the saturday night show while we chatted. He did drink during and even bragged about it. I couldn't stand the arrogance of it all! LOL But another friend was having trouble with some heavy drinking so my soon-to-be ex stopped drinking himself and became this other's partner in order to help his friend stop. We were all worried about him. It was all very noble and I believed he was in control of his drinking to be able to stop like that. It was after we had agreed to marry, made plans and he was living here that I saw who he really was. Now that I look back, I know he was hiding the fact that he started drinking out of control again. And yes, I enabled him to stay here and continue this behavior by not ending the relationship before the wedding. I felt stuck but then again, I was looking at it as a commitment and wanted to give him the chance to show me otherwise...

Justashooter said that one should "never marry a person you have not lived in close proximity to for less than a year. you will have no idea who they are." I wish I could have done that. But immigration laws make it hard to live together for long. I have been saying this to friends now because of what I have been going through and beating myself up for not knowing him better. Chatting for almost 2 years didn't let me know him, talking on the phone every day for an additional 1 1/2 years didn't let me really know him either. If he had been a very open person like me, I would have known who he was very quickly. Some couples are lucky to find partners who are as honest and open about themselves and find it easy to fall in love, marry and stay that way for many years. But I have to say that the other part of justashooter's statement "thats the trouble with internet marriages. they are based on imaginings and desire more than understanding and acceptance." is what's got me in this predicament in the first place! I foolishly accepted and understood his problems. I wanted to be the better person and accept him for who he was and love him unconditionally (much to my detriment!)

With regard to his work ethic, I never got to see him work in the real world. When his parents died, their inheritance allowed him to work at home (graphic design). He used to work with his parents at their store so he never really had an 'outside' job. What I didn't get to see is he was not always reliable working for family. With his parents gone, I never got to hear from them what he was like, nor did I get to meet more than a few friends of his. He admitted to being quite a partier in his days and had burned a lot of bridges with friends and he was reformed and had learned the hard way. THAT'S why I say I wanted to give him a chance to be the person I thought he was. But he reverted somewhat and it was too late for me after we had married. Do we EVER really get to know the significant other in our lives??? Seriously??

I learned a very valuable lesson here...in order for a relationship to work for ME, my partner will have to be someone who I have multiple things in common with, including core values (good work ethic, being a kind-hearted, giving person, one who does not smoke at all or drink in excess) things like that (disclaimer...I am not knocking smokers! It's just another instance of something that will not work for me). I do not like to argue, nor do I flip off people in traffic and yell foul-mouthed obscenities. And now that I think of it, no, I'm not posting my profile here to meet someone online! LOL Just trying to lighten this post....ok...I'm not knocking the criticism I'm getting. I knew I'd get some by posting my story publicly. Like I said, I made a mistake and I've learned the hard way what not to do next time in a relationship. I am looking forward to starting fresh when this is all over and enjoying MY life!

And to Cham...I don't feel guilty....just sorry for him. And by law, I have to give him something for his part of the house. At least I started this split early enough so that I was not supporting him for many years and ruining my self esteem in the process. I just know I will be careful with anyone who comes into my life from now on.

Just to remind some, I HAVE a lawyer and I asked if anyone else went through a similar situation...man not working, not motivated...I got some encouragement and some criticism...I understood I'd get both. I'm headed in the right direction....lawyer, a fair settlement for us both, and reminding HIM of what will happen when he moves out with the money I will give him (again, being fair in this divorce) and he WILL NOT be allowed back once he is out. Papers will be signed and we will go our separate ways...He will get the things that he called 'his' and I will keep what I had before he moved here with me. No one is loosing out in that department.

As to Al-Anon meetings, I have been to them, thank you. I was falling into the co-dependency trap but woke up and realized I needed to get this person out of my life now! All the right steps are being taken without breaking any laws...just hearts....I know I will be the better for doing it, I can only pray he will too.

Come on, justashooter. If the guy doesn't have control enough of his temper to not put his fist through a wall, she shouldn't wait until it's her face.

You need a lawyer. If he's been living here for nearly a year and he has assets in the house, just changing the locks on the doors is probably not the wisest first step. Here you could be found in the wrong for locking him out of his home, even if that wasn't your intent. The laws vary by state, which is why you need a family practice lawyer to see what your options are.

I will change the locks when he has moved out. It's the smart thing to do. After the tough talk I had with him last night, he made up a resume for the first time today and is actually going to post it in online job forums as well as drop it off at a few places this week. The things I said to him last night made him cry (again, not bitchy but tough-love things) things he needed to hear...the reality of his life if he didn't straighten up. I hope I made him understand that no one can live his life for him. He is the ONLY one who can make him happy and when he is ready to finally be happy, he will do the right thing for himself, starting with finding a job and being responsible. Man, I felt like I was talking to a teenager!! My kids are 19 and 17 and I NEVER had to talk to them like I did him. Both my kids have jobs, one after school, and the other worked for a year to save up for a special school...never asked for us to pay for it! Some people 'get it', others learn the hard way, I guess!

BTW...I have a lawyer who is just doing the basics, he will refer me to someone else if there is a disagreement about splitting our assets and I assured him we wouldn't have to do that. I think I mentioned before, after I give him half the money, he'll have the where-with-all to get his own place, then I will pay him the rest within the following 6 months.

to get a protective order you need to affirm that you are in real and personal fear of bodily injury. holes in the walls indicate that the walls (not you) are in fear of bodily injury. you have said that the guy is a "drunk" and in another post say that because you have all of the spending money he hasn't had a drink in 2 months. if he hasn't, he's not a "drunk". he is "dry".

for all of you women who have advised this person to get a restraining order so that she can have sole posession of a jointly owned house: i hope you realise that this kind of maneuvering is what keeps american men from even considering you as a marriage partner. this tactic is often used without reasonable fear of bodily injury by conniving women to effectively "steal" a house from their husband, rather than being forced to negotiate for it.

may you never again find a man to treat as poorly.

To address the 'he's a drunk' statement...if one is going to nitpick my words, then sorry...he is an alcoholic that is dry for the moment. I lived with an alcoholic most of my young years and believe me, I know the signs. I am happy he is not drinking and hope he can continue the dry spell when he has his own money to spend. He KNOWS he has a problem and if controlling the spending money is what is going to straighten his a** out and give him a head-start on cleaning up, then I have no qualms about it. Maybe this is the reason he was brought into my life...He really needed someone to show him tough-love.

Also, I have people (friends and family) telling me to essentially kick him out and I understand where those well meaning people are coming from. Yes, I want him out asap, but I DO have compassion for him as a person and don't want him to starve or be homeless. He deserves some portion of the house and I am actually giving him more than what a judge would tell me to give. The reason is, I know I can get the money back with my good job much faster than he can. And I'm truly sorry I couldn't give him more. But rest assured, justashooter, I am not a cold-hearted person wanting to find a way to kick him out to acquire sole possession of a jointly owned house. Those that are close to me know without a doubt that I am a warm, caring person who forgives way too easily and in caring for my well-being, gives advice like "kick him to the curb" and "get a protective order against him". No, I don't need to do that...in fact, if he so much as laid a hand on me, I won't be the one on the floor! And yes, at that point, his sh** would be in bags on the front lawn.

Thanks to those who are trying to encourage me. I'm sure you know how it feels to have someone in your corner. Those little words of encouragement really has given me the help or boost I needed to get through this.

"The sponsor is bound by law to provide financially for the person whom they signed the papers for during the visa process."

This statement makes me cringe...I have avoided posting here due to embarrassment for a mistake I made. I know I'm not the first one to commit a mistake like this but I can't believe I let this happen to me when I saw 'signs' and ignored them thinking I should give this man a chance. Now he has lost his job (I'm beginning to think on purpose) and is happy sitting around letting me work my a** off and not being motivated in finding another job. We have been separated for a good part of last year due to serious differences (not cultural) just things that didn't show themselves til later. One of them being he is a drunk. He had a good job but was fired for not showing up to work many times. His boss gave him many chances. I am beginning to believe he planned this so I would let him stay here. He was supposed to move out this month and now has no job, no money and is doing nothing to get work. I am so strapped that if something came up and I needed money for an emergency, I'm stuck!. I was willing to give him $ in the separation agreement but can't even save that up since he is not contributing financially. I have been given lots of advice from well-meaning friends from not buying food so he will be forced to get a job, to keeping record of all I buy for him and deduct that from the settlement amount. I just don't know what to do. He has family in Canada but refuses to get their help and has no one else here. I have tried to help direct him to do the right thing, get a job and move on like a responsible adult but to no avail. Has anyone been through something like this? (Btw, There is NO salvaging this relationship. This has made me gun-shy with regard to relationships now...) What can be done?

Can i have one of those puppies in your profile pic?

LOL sorry they already found homes. One is actually going to Westminster this year in NYC! Anyway....I know that I am enabling him to be lazy at this point. It's easy to say to kick him out and believe me, friends here at home say the same. I've seen friends come home to their stuff in garbage bags on the front lawn! (one whose wife had a new boyfriend and wanted to move him in and hubby out) I guess I just don't know where to send my ex. It's been around 0 degrees so he can't sleep in his car and has no money for a hotel and no friends or family in the states to get some help with. I'm almost tempted to call around to see where there are facilities that help people get on their own but at least give them a place to sleep. I don't know...I mentioned his adoptive family in Montreal but he had a negative answer for that...he wouldn't be able to get a job there if he doesn't speak French. The funny thought crossed my mind of seeing if my preacher uncle in FL would put him up til he got a job but I know he'd make him take his 5 piercings out, trim up and go to church with them!! I just wish I could come up with $4000 NOW (half of what I agreed to pay him for his part of the house) get him out and he can figure out what to do after that. I'm working in my free time designing and making custom western show shirts and every bit is being saved to use for getting him out. LOL my divorce fund!! I am calling home from work tomorrow to make sure his butt is up and go to the temp agency. He HAS to find something soon! I will definitely let you guys know the day he is out and my life starts fresh!!

I don't know what you're quoting in the first line of your post but it is not technically correct. If he is now a permanent resident, you could be responsible for reimbursing the US government for certain benefits he might obtain, not specifically for "supporting him".

I'd buy him a bus ticket back to his Canadian home town and twenty bucks for food, then change the locks an hang the ticket and the twenty in an envelope on the door.

I SO agree with pushbrk!! Go buy a one-way ticket, pack his #######, get it in the trunk, tell him you need to show him something or whatever and drop his sorry *ss at the bus depot! Honestly, I don't think he'd show up at your doorstep again. And this guy has any right to say he's a MAN??!! How sickening! I am sorry for you and I am embarrassed that he's a Canadian! Went thru the same experience myself except not married so I don't know why I stuck with the loser for 4 years! I know that I felt bad/sorry for him until I finally got to the point of having ENOUGH, didn't care if he had no money or no job, he had friends and a rich mommy to help him out. You owe him NOTHING for the ####### he's put you thru! Remember that...it will feel like a ton of weight off your shoulders when he's out, I guarantee you that!

Best of luck my friend...

hugz...

Thanks for all your words of encouragement. I've been living this hell for more than a year now and keeping much of it to myself trying to 'help' him out of the house. He has been counting on my sympathies as that had worked before. Sure I'd love to buy him a one way ticket to anywhere but it's getting him out that's hard. He says he has a right to be here since we both put money in the house and he doesn't really care that I can't save up anything while he is here and not working. The plan was that I would save it up and when I had half of what I'd pay him, he'd move out (get a place of his own or go back home) and I'd give him the rest over the next 6 months. What a friend suggested is that I write up an agreement that he'd sign that as of next Saturday, everything that I have to spend on him (food, gas money and meds) I will write receipts and this will be taken off what I owe him. If he ends up spending it all while he is here then he will leave with no money. Then I will HAVE to buy him a ticket home. I wish he would go back since he has adopted family there and I know they love him very much no matter what he's done. His parents passed away about 10 years ago and he found out afterwards that he was adopted. That's a big reason I feel for him as he's mentioned he feels alone with no one to really call family. He had burned a lot of bridges back home (with friends) with his horrible actions so I believe it's an embarrassment for him to go back. I would love to have confidence that he could start a life in the states on his own and form new friendships while he grows up (he's 43) but I found that he can't do much without encouragement and help from someone. He really needs to grow up!! And I really NEED to move on!!

Thanks again...and BTW...the quote was something I read here and it was just something that got me motivated to talk about my situation. I know I wont be made to financially support him as he is capable of that himself and I doubt he will try to get state support either. I wouldn't be surprised if he's trying to find someone else to move on with and get her to support him!!

You need to seek help from a divorce lawyer who can advise you on how best to protect yourself. You opening statement is a bit inaccurate.

"The sponsor is bound by law to provide financially for the person whom they signed the papers for during the visa process"

You would only be responsible for repaying any public funds your husband claimed. It does not mean that you have to financially support him while he sits home and drinks. This is why you need to speak with a lawyer who can help you get the correct information about what you are responsible for and what you are not responsible for.

Keep safe

Thanks for clearing that up! I have seen a lawyer who is drawing up the sep papers. which detail the amount I am to pay him (for his share of the house) to be fair in this divorce. My problem is that because he is refusing to work now, I can't save the money to get him out. I will pay him x amount of money and he will sign all papers to end this and house will be in my name only. I can't borrow any more. I will ask the lawyer if I can start deducting funds like rent, food, gas if he is still refusing to make an effort to work and help support himself while he is in this house. The one good thing about me controlling what goes in his mouth is that he has not had a drink in 2 months! (I will NOT buy alcohol) I have 2 holes in a wall and door due to his being drunk and angry and have not had to listen to abuse since he can't drink any more. The problem with him using up the money I will pay him is when it's all gone where does he go? How do I get him out? Contact his family? It's like he just doesn't care but I can't keep living like this and I can't make him take care of himself. I just don't know what to do beyond that point....

"The sponsor is bound by law to provide financially for the person whom they signed the papers for during the visa process."

This statement makes me cringe...I have avoided posting here due to embarrassment for a mistake I made. I know I'm not the first one to commit a mistake like this but I can't believe I let this happen to me when I saw 'signs' and ignored them thinking I should give this man a chance. Now he has lost his job (I'm beginning to think on purpose) and is happy sitting around letting me work my a** off and not being motivated in finding another job. We have been separated for a good part of last year due to serious differences (not cultural) just things that didn't show themselves til later. One of them being he is a drunk. He had a good job but was fired for not showing up to work many times. His boss gave him many chances. I am beginning to believe he planned this so I would let him stay here. He was supposed to move out this month and now has no job, no money and is doing nothing to get work. I am so strapped that if something came up and I needed money for an emergency, I'm stuck!. I was willing to give him $ in the separation agreement but can't even save that up since he is not contributing financially. I have been given lots of advice from well-meaning friends from not buying food so he will be forced to get a job, to keeping record of all I buy for him and deduct that from the settlement amount. I just don't know what to do. He has family in Canada but refuses to get their help and has no one else here. I have tried to help direct him to do the right thing, get a job and move on like a responsible adult but to no avail. Has anyone been through something like this? (Btw, There is NO salvaging this relationship. This has made me gun-shy with regard to relationships now...) What can be done?

Just a latest update on our case...permanent resident card arrived in mail today! What a relief to finally have that in hand

Now hubby can go back home to visit daughters and get his belongings. So happy for him!! I know he was more worried about all this than me, because he felt his life was on the line, but I knew things would work out in time. All the help we received here was priceless and we hope to be an encouragement to the others that are where we were. Congrats to the recent residents!!

Griffon76--------07/20/07-----07/23/07-----xx/--/07-----08/29/07------------------01/31/08------YES-------------59

Got the email on 2-13-08 that card production was ordered! Yeah!!!

Interview was a decent experience and rather quick and painless. We had a heart stopping moment when hubby was asked my middle name and he couldn't remember! She came back to it a minute later and he still was too nervous to remember something so simple. Then in the middle of another question, he remembers and blurts it out! LMAO These were the questions asked of us:

To hubby:

State your name and birth date.

What is your wife's name and birth date?

What is your address?

When was your last entry into the States and what type visa was used?

Did you have any arrests?

Have you done anything that you didn't get arrested for?

Ever involved in espionage, terrorist acts...planning on it?

Ever use someone else's passport, ID, etc?

Ever been denied entry into the States?

What are your parents names?

Still married? (this is when hubby thought she was asking about his parents and she said "No, are you two still married?")

Then she confirmed his daughter's names, birth dates and ex wives and divorce dates.

To me:

State your name and birth date.

When were you two married? Where?

How did you meet?

How long did we know each other before talking seriously?

When did we first meet in person?

Then she asked if I had any children and what were their names and birth dates.

She confirmed the info on my first marriage and divorce.

I had a copy of the AOS paperwork as well as additional enclosures of pay stubs, bills, insurance and checking acct info and receipts of trips and wedding. All were labeled and clipped together with a large clip. I had a list on top so she could see what was enclosed at a glance. (pats myself on the back LOL) I pulled out the packet of pictures I had made copies of. I told her she could keep them and she seemed pleasantly surprised. She asked me some questions of who was so-and-so and I was able to show her a friend and his girlfriend who was responsible for us meeting and she had me write that on the back of the photo. She asked me random questions of more pictures and then she said it will take up to 120 days for a decision. All she needed to do is go through the paperwork to make sure we had everything in order and would check if his name and fingerprints had cleared when she got back to the home office. We shook hands and left. It seemed to go pleasantly and we didn't leave with a feeling of worry. So I will check back as soon as we hear something.

Good luck to the rest of the July filers that have their interview to complete!

My husband's AOS interview is tomorrow morning and I can't help but wonder if something is amiss...We never got an I-130 approval notice. We have an NOA for it but it never even showed up online as everything else did. Will this affect the AOS approval? Thanks for your insight!

We filed the end of July and one of our apps STILL hasn't shown up in the system and our AOS interview is scheduled for tomorrow morning!

Just writing in to let you all know we got the interview letter. It's set for January 31, 2008 in Roanoke, VA in the am. I had been checking the site for touches, updates, nothing. The I-130 has not been entered but we received an NOA. I'm glad we've gotten to this point and keeping our fingers crossed that there are no unusual delays as some have had. Good luck to you all!

Sorry I didn't put this in the July Filers topic...can someone tell me how to move this? Thanks!

Just writing in to let you all know we got the interview letter. It's set for January 31, 2008 in Roanoke, VA in the am. I had been checking the site for touches, updates, nothing. The I-130 has not been entered but we received an NOA. I'm glad we've gotten to this point and keeping our fingers crossed that there are no unusual delays as some have had. Good luck to you all!

Congrats on the transfer and being able to view it online. My I-485 has now shown up online too but I still can't access my I-130.

It's the same here. I have not been able to access the info for the I-130. The I-485 was last touched on 9-06-07 and nothing more. We have the EAD.....

Is this a normal wait time for the I-130?

USERNAME----------FILED-------RECEIVED-------NOA1------BIOMETRICS----TRANSFER------INTERVIEW----APPROVED/STAMP--EAD*

yassmine2878-----06/14/07-----06/21/07-----07/02/07-----07/26/07-----------------06/14/07(DORA)---

P.T.(K2)---------06/22/07-----06/24/07-----07/05/07-----07/23/07--------------------11/15/07---

ericalamb--------06/22/07-----06/24/07-----07/03/07-----07/31/07--------------------10/24/07----------------------73

Luz and Robin----06/23/07-----06/24/07-----07/02/07-----07/25/07--------------------11/01/07---

Nyte-------------06/26/07-----06/xx/07-----07/02/07-----08/01/07--------------------------------------------------67

bostonparis------06/25/07-----06/26/07-----07/03/07-----07/27/07--------------------10/24/07----------------------79

cshell-----------06/25/07-----06/26/07-----07/03/07-----07/27/07--------------------10/17/07----------------------79

chinohk----------06/27/07-----06/29/07-----07/10/07-----07/17/07--------------------11/21/07----------------------74

MsA--------------06/27/07-----06/28/07-----07/06/07-----07/26/07--------------------------------------------------68

Jup1ter----------06/27/07-----06/28/07-----07/06/07-----07/31/07--------------------------------------------------69

JohnInSeattle----06/27/07-----06/28/07-----07/09/07-----07/30/07--------------------10/11/07----------------------83

isismendoza------06/28/07-----06/29/07-----07/09/07-----07/31/07--------------------09/14/07--(pending namecheck)-72

jw07-------------06/28/07-----06/29/07-----07/09/07-----07/31/07--------------------11/20/07----------------------70

Racer's Girl-----06/28/07-----07/12/07-----07/--/07-----07/31/07--

Mandysbaby-------06/29/07-----07/02/07-----07/12/07-----08/10/07--------------------------------------------------71

mrs.song---------06/29/07-----07/02/07-----07/11/07-----08/03/07--------------------10/12/07---

Chelseafan-------06/29/07-----07/02/07-----07/16/07-----08/01/07--------------------10/25/07---

RhondaM----------06/29/07-----07/--/07-----07/16/07-----

LV&LC------------07/02/07-----07/03/07-----07/12/07-----08/06/07--------------------10/11/07----------------------79

LovinJA----------07/02/07-----07/03/07-----07/11/07-----08/03/07--------------------09/27/07---

babyandherboy----07/03/07-----07/05/07-----07/13/07-----

Nicky44----------07/05/07-----07/09/07-----07/17/07-----08/16/07--------------------------------------------------66

OjosAzules-------07/05/07-----07/06/07-----07/23/07-----08/07/07-----09/07/07---

silivake---------07/06/07-----07/08/07-----07/16/07-----08/08/07--------------------------------------------------67

gabytalbert------07/06/07-----07/09/07-----07/16/07-----08/06/07--------------------10/30/07---

i adore u--------07/06/07-----07/08/07-----07/17/07-----08/08/07--------------------------------------------------69

reeses16---------07/07/07-----07/09/07-----07/17/07-----08/15/07--------------------------------------------------73

DeaniWait--------07/09/07-----07/10/07-----07/--/07-----08/11/07--

SirLancelot------07/10/07-----07/12/07-----07/19/07-----09/06/07--

Nanusia&Lukasz---07/10/07-----07/11/07-----07/18/07-----08/08/07--------------------11/29/07---

Sonshyne---------07/10/07-----07/16/07-----07/24/07-----08/16/07--------------------10/18/07----------------------66

Paulily----------07/10/07-----07/11/07-----07/18/07-----08/13/07--------------------09/25/07---

Bill and Hayley--07/10/07-----07/12/07-----07/19/07-----08/07/07--------------------10/05/07---

kiwigirl224------07/11/07-----07/12/07-----07/19/07-----08/08/07--------------------------------------------------65

divs76-----------07/12/07-----07/20/07-----07/--/07-----08/24/07--

iya--------------07/12/07-----07/16/07-----07/24/07-----08/14/07--------------------10/16/07----------------------65

cdancer57--------07/12/07-----07/13/07-----07/23/07-----08/14/07--

igomo------------07/12/07-----07/15/07-----07/23/07-----09/19/07--

Cecy-------------07/13/07-----07/16/07-----07/24/07-----08/22/07--

JelloShotGirl----07/13/07-----07/16/07-----07/23/07-----08/15/07--

CherylandMike----07/13/07-----07/15/07-----07/24/07-----08/10/07--------------------10/19/07---

Ricardo----------07/14/07-----07/--/07-----07/25/07-----08/17/07--

Livingwell-------07/15/07-----07/27/07-----

JamalNTam--------07/16/07-----07/18/07-----07/27/07-----08/14/07--

Skeeter211-------07/16/07-----07/18/07-----07/26/07-----08/17/07--------------------10/25/07----------------------64

lirachadsbaby----07/16/07-----07/18/07-----07/27/07-----08-30-07--

infomon----------07/16/07-----07/17/07-----07/26/07-----08/18/07--

javi1984---------07/16/07-----07/18/07-----07/27/07-----08/17/07--

pushbrk----------07/17/07-----07/19/07-----07/27/07-----08/15/07--

Sol-de-Verano----07/18/07-----07/20/07-----07/--/07-----08/23/07-----08/27/07-------------------------------------63

bloom------------07/18/07-----07/--/07-----xx/--/07-----08/21/07--

Icarus-----------07/18/07-----07/--/07-----07/--/07-----08/31/07--

KHagen-----------07/19/07-----07/20/07-----

ajames79---------07/19/07-----07/23/07-----xx/--/07-----08/25/07--

Karin und Otto---07/19/07-----07/24/07-----08/31/07-----09/13/07-----09/13/07---

Griffon76--------07/20/07-----07/23/07-----xx/--/07-----08/29/07-------------------------------------------------------59

zeeofman---------07/20/07-----07/23/07-----xx/--/07-----08/30/07--------------------11/08/07---

John&Diana-------07/21/07-----none yet-----09/22/07-----

ali1978----------07/21/07-----07/23/07-----xx/--/07-----08/22/07--

chloe------------07/23/07-----07/24/07-----xx/--/07-----09/04/07--

Bigb42-----------07/23/07-----07/26/07-----

helzie-----------07/23/07-----07/25/07-----

GARSEMROD--------07/23/07-----07/25/07-----

dee2701----------07/24/07-----07/25/07-----xx/xx/07-----09/07/07--

Mattob-----------07/24/07-----07/26/07-----

rno310-----------07/24/07-----07/25/07-----

GabachaYucateca--07/24/07-----07/26/07-----

Swamped----------07/24/07-----07/26/07-----

sk28-------------07/24/07-----07/26/07-----

* number of day from from packaged received (in Chicago) to EAD approval

What I'm reading is what I have feared. I just don't think we want to risk the chance of him being barred and having to start the process all over again. We would not be able to afford the fees for a while as well and hubby basically would be homeless there. Sure family can take him in but for how long and how it would affect us being separated for so long. Too many negatives to chance it.