dyntyne

A person presumed innocent? I quote from the OP: "...he admitted his intent was just to obtain his visa, and divorce me...He wants to divorce me and go back to India and marry a girl he knows and have her come here like he planned for so long."

What facts are you referring to, SingleDad?

Enough. @Merrytooth your post mad me laugh.

We are all talking about possibilities here. None of us really know what's going on. All I'm saying is, based on the evidence from her side of the story, combined with a specific cultural context (which happens to be India), seeking a divorce might be more complicated for this woman than was acknowledged in earlier posts.

But it's not possible to be "objective on the rights of a man in exactly the same position [as a woman]" because gender defines the position itself (Judith Butler, anyone?). Even if he does "just want a divorce," that's going to be much harder on her, as an Indian woman, living within her most immediate social circle, than it will be on him, as an Indian man, living half the world away from his most immediate social circle. There is no "objective" here.

I'm sorry, but I can't just leave it. This thread shouldn't end with that post.

Singledad, you couldn't possibly know that. And your posting in this manner isn't particularly constructive or interesting.

As a side note: have you ever been to India? Most of my friends have been in long-term long-distance relationships that baffle American dating sensibilities. There could very easily be a girl in India.

You know, I'm thinking of another interesting suggestion. A revenge, perhaps, if the guy is really doing what he says he's doing. Are you in touch with his parents? More importantly, do you have any way of getting in touch with this other woman's parents? The quickest way to bring an end to a relationship in India is to out the couple to the parents. Of course, you should still divorce the man, but if you get the rumor spread -- that he was previously married, and that too to an American for a GC -- then you might cut off his supply off potential future brides. I find it highly unlikely that, whoever this girl is in India, her parents would be okay with her marrying this man. Leave him, by all means, and pray that your family has the strength to support you -- if not today, then at least eventually -- but also make it hard for him to exit with dignity. He wants to pay you for it? Dignity for dignity. Why not?

Is that all you could decipher from my message? I didn't rule out the possibilities of the guy being a fraud, but I was balancing my discussion. It's possible both had different motives which is factual. To be fair, review both sides of the coin before casting stone. The family could possible have seen something which is why they do not believe her afterall. The world would be a better place if we all play safe not to call for the other sides head till you get the real gist. I have come across too many liars on the internet crying wolf when they are the real "tormentors". My post is very well balanced for any balanced soul. No remorse to laying out my views. If you can read my post, then PASS by.

My first reaction was the same. Why wouldn't the family believe her? It's fishy, to be sure. Yes, we're not hearing the husband's story.

But then I think about what it means to commit to a marriage in India, and conversely, what it means to contemplate divorce -- and furthermore, how intensely gendered these questions are. Particularly if it's an arranged marriage -- or even if it's a love marriage but the parents are operating in a cultural framework that assumes arranged marriage -- it's highly likely that the parents wouldn't believe her only because they wouldn't want to. It's possible that she's exaggerating and her parents a denying it, but it's equally possible that this is an instance of classic Indian patriarchy operating so effectively that this girl is rendered unreliable in comparison to her husband in her parents' eyes. I have seen it happen so many times with my girlfriends in India (and even NRI friends in the US).

And if it is the case that her parents are choosing not to believe her, then this might be her only outlet. Where else could she be heard?

The senator's office can't "do" anything, so it doesn't matter before or after. All they can do is request information on the case, which might speed it up because the embassy is required to respond quickly to a senator, so if the application is just sitting on a desk somewhere, the senator's prod might get it picked up and reviewed.

Or it might not. And then all they can really do is advise you and prod the embassy. So I say: prod sooner rather than later.

The senator's office can't "do" anything, so it doesn't matter before or after. All they can do is request information on the case, which might speed it up because the embassy is required to respond quickly to a senator, so if the application is just sitting on a desk somewhere, the senator's prod might get it picked up and reviewed.

Or it might not. And then all they can really do is advise you and prod the embassy. So I say: prod sooner rather than later.

Taal, was this an arranged marriage? You have this tiny bit in your post -- "I dislike being an Indian girl, it's so hard" -- that makes me think divorce might be harder on you than many of the people responding to your post realize.

Maybe you can provoke him into revealing his true intentions to your parents? Start an argument with a cell phone recorder on or something? He must be communicating with this girl in India. Do you have any way of accessing records of his communications with her? Do you pay the cell phone bill? Check the records with the phone company. Is he making frequent calls to someone who is not in his family in India? Otherwise, what about email? Do you ever have the chance to access his email? Facebook? Find some semblance of proof for your parents. It will be much easier if you have the support of your family, particularly if they are involved and invested in the relationship and you are living with them.

Shouldn't be a problem — my fiancé also had to content with a 221(g). It was really quick once he got the required documents (see timeline).

You should contact your senator. I had my senator (Tom Udall, New Mexico) submit an inquiry at the embassy when we were waiting for our interview date. We got an interview date about a week after the inquiry. I'm not sure it helped (maybe it would have come anyway) but at least the embassy will pick up the case and respond to the senator.

Also, the senator's office will likely forward you the letter from the embassy, which will probably tell you what you already know (that the case is under processing) but if there's a reason for delay that you don't know about (AP or something funny), you'll find out sooner if they're forced to respond to a senator (because, as I'm sure you know, the VFS monkeys don't have any real information about anything).

For K-1 visa, you need I-134. You'll need to use I-834 when you apply for AOS after you get married.

I know from experience — I used I-134 for my fiancé this summer at the Delhi consulate, and we submitted the AOS paperwork with I-834 several months ago. Both were accepted.

Best of luck!

my thoughts to you is to do whatever is fastest, and that's probably going to mean not changing his official record. The birth certificate situation is a real mess in India, particularly when the US govt. steps in and insists on having documentation that "proves" what would otherwise be asserted by a document equivalent to a US birth certificate. I don't think it's worth it to try and change the official record, but you also can't have his parents make an affidavit swearing that he was born "on the legal/passport date of Dec' 84." You have to swear it's his real birthday. This is what my fiancé did, and it worked fine (he was in the same situation). My point is that it's either all the way or nothing because the US Embassy chooses to not understand that some people in India have different "real" and "official" birth dates. Thus, you have to play the same game.

Also, I'm assuming you've already submitted some paperwork, right? And it sounds like you've been using the birthdate on his passport, right? If you submit any documents with a different birthdate, my guess is that this won't just create confusion -- it will probably bring your entire application to halt. Much of the documentation required in this process is needlessly repetitive, and I think part of the reason is because they want to see cases that reassert the same identity for the same applicant again and again. Everything needs to line up, from the data on the forms to the proof of relationship to the answers given during the interview.

So, in brief: continue to postulate his "official" birth date as his "real" one, and get the documentation to "prove" it.

It has to be stamped with a PCC from the local passport office. You can apply online via http://www.passportindia.gov.in/ and then go to the local office the next day to get the stamp and a letter certifying the stamp.

My fiancé got a 221(g) for not having the proper PCC. He got his original PCC from the passport section of the local police office, and it was just a piece of paper -- not a passport stamp. They wouldn't accept it at the Delhi Embassy, and he had to go back and get a second clearance from the local passport office.

Good luck!

Hey guys,

I've called the US Embassy and the VFS service center a few times and I can't seem to get a consistent response from anyone about this question. My fiancé's interview is on the 17th (this upcoming Tuesday) and we're trying to figure out how to pay for the visa. The amount we need to pay is $240 (this much is clear), but according to VFS, we can pay with either a demand draft OR in $USD cash. So here are my questions:

1) Does the US Embassy actually accept $USD cash? Or is VFS crack?

2) If the US Embassy accepts both demand drafts and $USD, is one better than the other? I don't know anything about demand drafts -- are they more reliable? Can we track a demand draft?

3) If we do submit a demand draft, how much should it be? Should it be in dollars or rupees? According to someone who just had an interview, the amount is rs 13920, but when I called VFS, they told me rs 9280. Maybe that's just a sign that VFS doesn't have a clue? Rs 9280 isn't even close to the proper exchange for $240...

Anyway, thanks for any help you can provide! I can't believe his interview is in three days!!!!

Thank you for both of your responses! I had already looked at the Tips for Affidavits of Support section, but I my concerns were more specific, so I posted here

I don't think I'll be able to find a co-sponsor... my parents are the only people close to me who have the resources for tho kind of thing, and I wouldn't feel comfortable asking anyone else anyway.

So I guess my question has changed somewhat: Does anyone know how to document grant money? Can it be used for these purposes? It certainly is income for me, and it puts me at $22,000.

Otherwise, what if I were to get a letter from my parents (notarized and in legalese), asserting that they will continue to provide the $7,200 a year? Any thoughts?

Thanks again for your responses!

My fiancé is from India and we have been together for three years. Our I-129f petition was approved about two weeks ago. We're now trying to preemptively assemble the documents for packet 3 and packet 4 so we can be prepared when the US embassy in Delhi contacts him. I'm having trouble with the I-134, because my parents, who are financially conservative, are unwilling to do anything that might make them legally liable for my fiancé (who they have not yet met, because it's impossible to get a tourist visa from India and they weren't about to go to India) — in other words, they are reluctant to be co-sponsors. Actually, more than reluctant — it looks like they won't do it all now (I just got off the phone with them). I don't blame them, but now I'm worried we won't be able to get the visa.

I'm a graduate student, working on my PhD in anthropology, and my fiancé is a fashion designer in India (although I don't think his situation matters much for the financial side of the K-1 application, unless he has a ton of assets, which he doesn't). My income looks something like this:

Yearly fellowship: $8,000

Yearly T.A. salary: $8,000

Summer research grant: $6,000*

Extra support from parents for apartment rent: $7,200*

Total yearly income: $29,200

According to this, I have more than enough of an income to cover the I-134 myself. However, two of these sources are variable, and I don't know if I have any official way to declare them (the ones marked with the *). For the next several years (I'm in the first year of my PhD program, and it's about 6-8 years long), I will get funding every summer, but the source and the amount will vary. Furthermore, the money my parents give me for rent is money that I have not declared officially anywhere, and I don't really know how to declare it. It's just a monthly gift from parents who are very kind and understand that graduate school can be tough (having been through it once themselves). I do not have personal property, stocks or bonds, life insurance, or real estate. I have only a few thousand dollars in savings.

So without these two sources (my parents' money for rent, and my summer funds), my income becomes: $16,000. But it looks like I need about $19,000 for the I-134.

Here are my questions:

How do I declare the money that my parents give me as income? Will the fact that I don't have any assets hurt my application, as long as I have a real job? I was able to get an employment letter from my University verifying the yearly $16,000 and continued employment, but I don't think they can verify the summer $6,000, because the amount (and source of funding) might change in future years. Should I just submit the letter I received when I got this summer's grant? Would that work, or is it irrelevant, because it's not steady employment?

Am I in trouble if I can only get proof of employment amounting to $16,000? What about banks statements that show $29,200?

Anyway, sorry — I know this is a huge amount of information. I really appreciate any advice you can offer!!!

Ronn,

As it looks like your application has moved along since you first posted, can you provide an update on some of your own questions? Is it the case that your fiancé only needed to send DS-230 part 1 in response to Packet 3?

I've just received the NOA2, and I guess now I've just got to wait until I receive notice from the NVC. Once I receive it, do you recommend my fiancé email the US embassy in New Delhi, as suggested by R.&S.? Have you emailed the embassy about your Packet 4?

Best of luck! And congratulations on getting so far along in the process!