seaguliable

I understand this is discrimination but this is something you and your husband should have been prepared for as this is what happens all the time. And many fraud marriages got approved and the US spouse never sees it coming, they always go into it in love. Everyone always says that will never happen to me but honestly it happens more times then we know, and I'm not saying your marriage is fraud, you obviously love him very much to get this upset, but your husbands response to those questions is what put you in this position. Proof is on paper and anyone can smile for a picture and put a happy front forward. It's your husbands answers and reaction to each question that will go above and beyond the paper proof. And now its all just his word against the embassies word. This is nothing against you the US citizen, this is against your husband who is going outside his culture for what they want to prove is love not just the US.

" you obviously love him very much to get this upset" Thank You so much for see this

Actually you are wrong, about twice as many woman get scammed and they tend to lose a lot more then men. And how much of the wealth is inherited and how much is earned. Not sure where you are getting your numbers from only 6 other the top 50 wealthiest in the world are woman and they aren't the top ones. In the US it drops to 5 of the top 50. Beware of creative accounting by the bra burners of the 60's

*see additional postings

Your quotes are from a site called she-comomy , hardly an unbiased site.

Many woman have married younger men in Nigeria and gotten approved. The bigger the differece the harder it is , because it is very important to the Nigerian culture that a man produces a son. More so for the oldest son , who inherits the wealth and the headaches of his father. The issue is to confront the problems. Nigeria also accounts for a huge portion of the DV lottery entries. To most of Nigeria coming to the US is the dream of their lives. They know the chances are small and there are a huge number that think nothing of a marriage to someone as old as their mother if it means getting that coveted green card. The embassy is trying to stop women from being used. If you didn't get it right this time around take a deep breath and do better next time. Having to file twice isn't that uncommon for Lagos

ty for the info "because it is very important to the Nigerian culture that a man produces a son" I think in most cultures this norm though but I imagine there more so

Can't say I disagree with the claims of blatant discrimination. (I spoke to an attorney who said my case will be viewed as a naive young white girl getting swept of her feet by a latin lover *ugh please*)

But I see this more as an insult to your husband than to the female half. Maybe he was perceived as a man who would prefer a traditional lifestyle, or just wanted a ticket to America. Seems like he was judged incorrectly, either way. If you were not present, he should be assuming most of the responsibility for the result of the interview. And you made a good point, maybe they were testing his reaction.

As far as I can tell, when going through the process of marrying a foreigner (and bringing them to the US), you have to explain and defend every detail of your relationship that is not mainstream/most widely accepted in both countries. What is private and protected in most relationships in the US is scrutinized during the immigration process

i agree and thanks for understanding ,my frustration is how to defend my age when i figured in this day in the usa we are beyond that type mentation.

lol guy ..i am not sure where your numbers come from mine come from marketing profile who is buying and putting money into the economy ,which equals work force ...you know job? And as for scamming some how i dont think african males got the cornerstone on that one

there plenty of males in usa who do that really well.I think i should have had my case looked at for if all componets are in place that are required and no matter what you say or think i am firm on belief that age should not be a factor as you so dearly want to make it so.And i know that is not what is gonna show up as why they rejected ,so i am curious to see reason they put .But i tell you right now bra burning or not the same amt of taxes come out of my paycheck as yours so why is my age a factor and not a guys

Actually you are wrong, about twice as many woman get scammed and they tend to lose a lot more then men. And how much of the wealth is inherited and how much is earned. Not sure where you are getting your numbers from only 6 other the top 50 wealthiest in the world are woman and they aren't the top ones. In the US it drops to 5 of the top 50. Beware of creative accounting by the bra burners of the 60's

and guy i traveled all the way to africa met a good friend of over a year who i then fell in love with and ended up marrying him ..and not once were we in a cafe its a sterotype of the non american african male

"silly little boys that use fake boarding passes in the US" what about silly little girls ?? and guy ..really you think 50 year old woman are stupid??" Senior women age 50 and older control net worth of $19 trillion and own more than three-fourths of the nation's financial wealth." – readjust those rose colored glasses ,I am sure there are just as many men who get scammed

"silly little boys that use fake boarding passes in the US" what about silly little girls ?? and guy ..really you think 50 year old woman are stupid??" Senior women age 50 and older control net worth of $19 trillion and own more than three-fourths of the nation’s financial wealth." – readjust those rose colored glasses ,I am sure there are just as many men who get scammed

I see you haven't studied the culture there much. Even of the law states otherwise you will find that women in Nigeria are chattel. You do not inherit, you need your husbands permission to travel outside the country. The embassy is used to seeing the local cafe scammers talk some lonely older ( usually white ) women into parting with her money and her heart. They are probably 100% sure you believe the relationship is real. What they doubt is your husbands intentions. Half the people that get marriage based visas from Nigeria don't last more than 2 years after the Nigerian steps foot in the US. The stats for older woman / younger man are half that. What did you present above and beyond the basic requirements to show them your relationship is two way and for real. Personally I don't want anymore undie bombers or silly little boys that use fake boarding passes in the US. Maybe they need to raise the bar even higher.

i am not sure ,it could have been to test his response about me ,but needless to say it should not be a factor in the interview what should be a factor is if the marriage has proof of being real.From what I am told it was not the proof that was questined .Everything that was asked for was produced .It was the age difference and they laughed at him for being with me ...some how i do not think laughing at a persons age is any part of testing.

Agreed, that was a crappy comment for someone to make.. and if it was that was the reason given for the denial then it is a load of #######.. was it? Or was it thrown out in the interview to test your spouses response?

its not outside my social norms of usa for a older woman to be with a younger guy ,hower its against the law to allow my age and sex as a factor in any decision from a person representing the USA and to state it at a interview is insulting to me regardless if i am present or not

i bet you that reason is not placed on any peice of paper sent to me. Like I say any other reason i could have dealt easily with ,but belittling my age puts women in usa back in the dark ages .

If a situation is outside the cultural norms of the local society, the CO is within reason to question it.

i am not the one to first spew for sexist issue to say because i am 20 years older in this forum and cant give birth to children is a reason that i am being denied really set me off .how would you like me to say you got little chance because your older and got a prostate problem ..i mean gezz..quote"The age difference (20 years) will continue to be a huge factor if she has passed the age of child-bearing. " i sound like a peice of chattel

.. and yet other white females your age with younger men get approved every single day. Instead of complaining about race, age, and gender you should see why others like you have made it and you did not.

I don't disagree with everything you are saying but spewing out constant streams of sexist/racist remarks (ie: "Lilly white male American self righteous.. ") and wallowing in victim-hood is not going to get you what you want. Your spouse was not denied because you are an older woman though I would hazard to guess that if you shared your attitude towards all things white that have a ####### with the CO it could have had a possible prejudicial effect.

Is this a fake thread or you just don't understand? A "cougar" is an older woman, not at "guy" and the person who started this thread is a man from Ghana, not Nigeria as indicated in your profile.

Why would you wish to marry a man that is 20 years younger ? You are in yr 50 's . I remember a movie ''How Stella found her groove back''. If I may ask --Are you a white Americian or African American ? Just asking . I am looking through the eyes of the Interviewing Officer. I see some ''red flags '' . Just saying .

Are you a white Americian or African American ? Just asking . I am looking through the eyes of the Interviewing Officer. I see some ''red flags '' . Just saying .....really it makes a differance if i am a white american woman or a black american woman???

You can and did marry who you chose. But it is part of the duty of the government is to protect the population of the country. The wishes of one person do no outway the needs of all. You are free to travel to any place that will allow you entry , you can marry any single person you please for the most part. You can not order the governmnet to let this person follow you home. You must satisfy the government that your marriage is for real and that person must pass the government back ground checks. You were given a homework assignment to bring proof that they accept, the first test they gave you an F now is the time to put that energy into getting an A for the final grade.

I did I got a F for being 50 and female

The US Constitution is silent on marriage for two reasons. The first reason is that marriage is not a Federal issue, and the second, more important, is that marriage was not a matter for government at all when the Constitution was written.

Marriage predates the Constitution. Marriage was around for thousands of years before the Constitution was written, and everyone knew what it was. The legalities of marriage, such as marriage licenses and the like, are products of the twentieth century, and were created to protect an existing institution.

i am just saying i should be able to as a usa citzen marry whom i choose and bring them here as long as they are not a criminal or threat to anyone and am upset i jumped through govermental hoops and the best they could come up with was my age

There are PLENTY of double standards in life where WOMEN are the beneficiaries, and MEN get the shaft. FAMILY COURT is the most immediate example that comes to mind.

The OP has the unrealistic expectation that life is fair. Well, I got a news flash for ya: It isn't!

So forget fair. The fact is, a 70 year old geezer CAN impregnate a 22 year old sweet thing. Plus, Nigeria is the biggest fraud country around. Just Google it.

Remember, the USCIS is also trying to protect the American from fraud

Peace.

fyi usa goverment isnt protecting me from anything ,let alone fraud guy where you been??

Why would you wish to marry a man that is 20 years younger ? You are in yr 50 's . I remember a movie ''How Stella found her groove back''. If I may ask --Are you a white Americian or African American ? Just asking . I am looking through the eyes of the Interviewing Officer. I see some ''red flags '' . Just saying .

This site is for US Immigration.

I have no idea about immigrating to Ghana, perhaps something your Husband can research.

I am taliking about my i-30 application for him ,someone on here said i have to move there for 2 months to be taken serouisly ,i want to know about my 1-30 for him i requested ghana not nigeria it ended up there cus he was in school there

I put my picture up i am white ,but you know if i was a white guy i donrt think anyone would have said a word about anything which really pisses me off cause i have been independant raised 3 kids and made my own choices through the years have a career that pays decently and live in a state geared to woman and woman rights and am a strong advocate of a womans right to be a cougar....go demi moore..and dam you ,you lilly what american self rightous C.O male

lolz

OK TY..AM NOW SMILING questine my spouse was in school in nigeria but we married in his home country ghana we did not realize untill late in the game LOS meant lagos all this time i thought we had interviews and our case was followed in ghana,I am upset cause sorry guys i am never living in nigeria bur ghana i didnt mind at all can i get the venue changed??

Why would you wish to marry a man that is 20 years younger ? You are in yr 50 's . I remember a movie ''How Stella found her groove back''. If I may ask --Are you a white Americian or African American ? Just asking . I am looking through the eyes of the Interviewing Officer. I see some ''red flags '' . Just saying .

Yes discrimination is alive and well in Lagos. My husband was asked in his interview if his father died because he was marrying a white woman.

First, if this was an immigrant visa denial, it was a CR1 or IR1 visa, not K3 that you applied for. There is nothing for the foreigner to do at this point. In a few months, the US Citizen will have an opportunity to appeal what is called a "Notice of Intent to Revoke" the approval of the I-130 petition. If successful, the case will be sent back to Accra for a second interview.

In my experience, unless the US Citizen spouse arranges to go spend at least a couple months living together with the foreign spouse as husband and wife before the next interview, there's little reason to expect a different outcome from the second interview.