Gosia & John

There's a difference between HAS looked at porn and IS looking at porn.
I know for 10000% sure that Tony doesn't look at porn. He doesn't go to strip clubs (and wouldn't). I know he DID while he was single. I know he DID while he was in the military. If I found out that even after our discussion on it and our views on the subject that he was watching porn it would rightly p*ss me off.
I don't consider porn healthy for our relationship, neither does my husband. Whether other people do or not is their business. The OP has voiced to her husband her opinion of it and he's dismissing it. Some people are okay with open relationships but if BOTH people aren't it's cheating.

Do NOT listen to those lawyers--these cases rarely cost less than $5000, and often much more. LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY--you must go to www.immigrate2us.net as suggested before and you MUST talk to Laurel Scott--she is among the very best for this type of situation.
DO NOTHING else before you talk to her--your whole future hinges on it.

If the trust is gone (sounds like it surely is on his side with the constant accusations of cheating), I don't really know where you can go as a couple.
The fact that he's worked without authorization and now has a DUI on his record are going to make adjusting status extremely difficult, aside from all the financial and marriage issues you have.
Sometimes you just have to cut your losses, move on and protect yourself first. You don't owe him a life here. He hasn't done much to deserve one here anyway from the sound of it.