People just dont get it, do they?

[Laurence+Lauren 0]

Hey, Lovemyaussie, congratulations for you two! I can’t begin to think how hard it must be for you both, from both sides, with a baby in the mix. I have much respect for what you’re doing and I hope they don’t keep you waiting a second more than is absolutely necessary.

I thought I’d give you all a taste of things from the immigrant’s point of view, as there’s many similar feelings and experiences but also some different things too. For instance, I totally get the fact that others have no idea what we’re going through or why we’re doing this. Fortunately for me, these people are in the minority. For the most part, the people who I’ve told have shown a genuine interest in the whole process, and especially my relationship with Lauren, how we met, when we’ll marry etc, etc. Even my customers at work ask me how things are going on that front every time they pop in!

The interesting aspect has been telling my family. There are some who are genuinely pleased for me, after all the bad treatment I received at the hands of my ex, they’re glad that I’ve finally found someone who appreciates me. And, regardless of the fact I’ll have to move away to be with Lauren, they’re still happy for me. But there are some members of my family, particularly those members considerably older than me that I don’t see that often, who treat me as if I’m making some kind of ghastly mistake, and think I’m in danger of being ‘tricked’ by this ‘strange’ internet-love. It shows that not only do they have no grasp of the situation, but also that they are too selfish just to be happy for me. I know ALL my family will miss me when I go. But I was really disappointed when those few people chose to react that way. I wouldn’t mind if they had some genuine reason for concern, but it’s all unfounded. They are just making excuses because they don’t want me to go away. Well, if I lived my life trying to please those negative people, I’d never find my happiness. I just wish they could be big enough to be happy for me.

On a day-to-day basis, I’ve actually stopped talking about Lauren now. I hate the thought of being a jukebox with just the one tune. But if someone asks me, I’ll talk their ears off about her and the whole process! But I’m guessing most people do the same in this situation. It’s not just days we have to wait, it’s MONTHS. So for the good of those around us, we lock up a lot of the anguish of missing our SO’s. I think for that reason, we insulate others as to what we are really going through. So when something truly great happens with our applications they don’t appreciate it for what it is. Perhaps they mistakenly assume that it doesn’t affect us that much. But I guess it’s really that inner circle of people that counts. The people we do tell how much it hurts and how long we have to wait. At the end of the day, as long as my SO and I are happy once we get to the stage to start celebrating stuff, I don’t really care whether other people understand or not. Still, it’d be nice if they did, wouldn’t it?