Please help me figure out my best course of plans

[tswielder 0]

Hi,

I am having a hard time deciding what to do, so I decided to write here to get some advice. I hope you can share ideas with me. Here is my situation.

I have been in the United States "legally" since 1999, mostly as a student. I have BS, M.S., M.A., and a doctorate degrees. However, it has been pretty hard to find an employer who is willing to sponsor work visa. Even the ones that showed strong interests in me pulled out at the mention of work visa. Anyhow, while I was struggling with this, just last year, I found out that I won the diversity lottery. My case number is rather late (11,000ish) in the Asia category. I know that this year's processing is roughly 1,000 cases behind compared to the previous year, so I am not certain if they'll get to my number in time. If they do, it will most likely be in September (August if I'm lucky). So, I switched to a visitor's visa to buy some time to make it to this green card that's supposedly coming. In the midst of all this, my boyfriend (we are a same sex couple) suggested that we got married instead of playing this waiting game. We're a legitimate couple, but we haven't been living together. We also broke up once last year and got back together. Anyhow, we are planning to move in together in about a month. We live in California, so I know we can get married here and file necessary paper work, but I just don't know if it's better to do that or if it's better to wait and see if the diversity lottery comes through. Another factor is, while I love him and he loves me, nobody can know 100% what may or may not happen in the future. While he'd never do anything that would harm me in any way, I also wonder what if the marriage ends up not working out, which would put me in a complicated situation as far as visa goes. I thought about various scenarios, such as:

- Forgetting about the diversity lottery and just go with marriage.

- Wait and see if the diversity lottery comes through. If he does, it's great, and we can still get married after I get my green card.

- Basically the same scenario as the above but the diversity lottery doesn't come through > we get married, and I apply for green card that way.

- We get married now but don't apply for visa based on marriage. We wait and see if I can get a green card through diversity lottery. If it comes through, great. If not, we file petition at that time.

My brain has been like scrumbled eggs, thinking about all possibilities. I would appreciate any insights or advice you may be able to share with me.

Thank you,

[inlovebutlonely 6]

well, I feel for you, you do have a lot of thinking to do but I will tell you this if you have so many questions and are so unsure of your future with your partner than maybe it is best to not marry. The future is unknown to us all but when two ppl are ready to marry they don't think so much of the relationship failing. What I do think you should do is speak with your partner and try to figure this out together. I hope you can make the best decision for YOU!

[christeen 966]

All options are ok.. It is just really a question of "do you want to get married"? If you do, then great, go for it, if you prefer to wait for a relationship reason, then that is the best... But don't let immigration decisions interfere with decisions for you relationship... Easier way would of course be to marry, then file based on marriage...

[Avery Cates 1,141]

Visa business aside, if you're not sure about a marriage, you probably shouldn't do it.

[tswielder 0]

Thanks for the replies. To me, the uncertainty is for everything. That's how I've lived my entire life. It's not reflection of how I feel about him but it's just the way I think. It's even more so because I didn't think marriage would be an option as a gay man, who wasn't given that option for such a long time. Straight people had their entire life to think about it. Me, it's only last year that it became an option (at least where I live). I think one concern I have is, it might look suspicious if we get married after and if the lottery doesn't come through. I wouldn't want them to think that we are getting married because I couldn't get my visa via lottery.

Oh, and, one more thing. Has anyone gone through the process when you're already in the United States? I would love to hear about precedence, especially because everything I find talks about bringing someone who is currently outside of the United States.

I'm also wondering about any financial requirements. My partner went back to school this year to change his career. I'm not working right now because of the visa situation, so we can't show much financial stability. Would that be a problem?

Edited May 5, 2014 by tswielder

[Boggy1974 124]

Yes there is a link for you here up the top of the page. Search there and read more about the adjustment of status link and related topics.

Also, you can have a co-sponsor when the time comes. As much as both of you currently having no employment is a drawback, lots of people have done it without. A co sponsor can be a family member or a close friend who meets the financial requirements.

Finally, go with what your mind & gut tells you. Go ahead and make a decision based on feedback and your research. You don't have time to waste. The only bad thing is letting indecision take the better part of you. GL!

[tswielder 0]

Yes there is a link for you here up the top of the page. Search there and read more about the adjustment of status link and related topics.

Also, you can have a co-sponsor when the time comes. As much as both of you currently having no employment is a drawback, lots of people have done it without. A co sponsor can be a family member or a close friend who meets the financial requirements.

Finally, go with what your mind & gut tells you. Go ahead and make a decision based on feedback and your research. You don't have time to waste. The only bad thing is letting indecision take the better part of you. GL!

Thank you. You make a good point. I think I know what I'm going to do now. I don't want people to even suspect that I married him for green card, so I'm going to wait and see if the green card comes with via lottery. If I get it through it, I can also save him trouble of having to go through the interview and any additional work involved. The last thing I want is to burden him with stuff like that, especially when he's going to school (and they work him hard). We'll go ahead and get married and move in together next month. If the green card doesn't come through, we'll file a petition through marriage as a last resort.