Pocahontas

Just found this here on VJ:

As a general rule a physical or legal separation does not necessarily constitute a legal termination of the marriage for immigration purposes, even if neither party is intending to cohabitate again. Caveat: There are some situations where a legal separation is a legal termination of a marriage for immigration purposes. This occurs when extant state law automatically converts legal separations into divorce after a specific period of time. New York is an example. If you have any question as to the ramifications of separation in your state, please confer with a qualified immigration specialist.

An alien that is separated, either physically or legally, may need to perform specific requirements for immigration purposes.

Like i said, I don't want to file for a divorce just so USCIS doesn't get the wrong impression about our marriage! If I do file for divorce, I NEED to file for the right reason, not just to be in good standing with them. I mean, yeah, I do want my permanent GC, but I also need to do what's right for my hysband and my marriage. Ugh!

Great !

The more I look into it, the more I realize I do have to file for divorce.

So, I'm not going to open a whole new topic on the divorce thread, I'll just ask here: if my GC expires September 2011, do I HAVE to file for ROC 90 days before that ? If yes, I'm filing and then, I'm patiently waiting for the final divorce decree to be issued, which I will later provide to USCIS as an RFE.

If not, can I file when I get the divorce decree?

What are the stipulations about that?

I know I ask a lot of questions, but I would apreciate feedback from whoever has experience.

She is the one living in his house, not the other way around. So he doesn't have the heart to confront her, not to mention tell her to move out!!

In the meantime, our marriage fell apart, and the only thing I could do, before I would lose my mind, was move out. She's still there.

So, the idea of filing for divorce crossed my mind...I'm still awake at night trying to figure out what to do. In the possibility that I do file for a divorce but I don't get the final decree before my GC expires, what am I looking at?

I'll get a lawyer with the filing for ROC by myself, if that's the case, but I'm trying to get the pieces of the puzzle together as soon as possible.

To canadian_wife: you asked me how I'm going to prove we had a bona fide marriage: we know each other for 20 years, same hometown, tons of letters, greeting cards and evidence from before the marriage to show we really wanted to stay together, and also the common proofs from during the marriage: joint W2's, bank accounts, medical insurance, car insurance, car loans, etc etc. So I am not worried at all about proving the authenticity of my marriage.

Here's the long story short: my conditional GC expires September 2011, so in June we should start filing for removal of conditions. I actually moved out of the house after 13 months of marriage, due to his mother being impossible and bossing us around like no tomorrow.

I am not 100% sure I want a divorce, but I don't know where I am standing right now with USCIS. Can we still file jointly, get this out of the way so we have one less thing to worry about and focus on seeing if we can work our marriage out?

P.S. I haven't made a secret of the fact that I moved out: I am on the lease agreement where I live right now, and have utility bills on my name. Can USCIS possibly understand that I simply HAD to move out because of that woman???? (we have filed jointly our W2's, and they are showing her as a dependent). Also, due to her medical condition and nowhere else to go, it is not possible yet to consider the option of her not living with us anymore.

I'd apreciate a response, as I am clueless.

I left him 6 months ago, for a million reasons that I'm not gonna go into right now.

After trying to make things the way they used to be, he reached the same conclusion like I did: DIVORCE.

He's the USC, I'm the conditional GC holder. What's wiser: for me to file, for him to file, or try to file jointly? I live in a no fault state, so we don't need to prove that one of us was at fault. Also, I don't need anything from him.

Gather information that proves you married in good faith, keep it where he can't find it, maybe at work?

What kind of information are we talking about ??????

If it were me, I would first point out to my husband that I married him, not his mother.

I did that, he doesn't understand me, doesn't understand what I am going through, especially that his mom hates me.

But my only question was about my standing with the immigration process, I didn't wanna vent here too much.

Well, the Affidavit doesn't worry me, it is obvious I am never gonna claim anything pertaining to that.

Somebody here said that maybe my finances go on personal expenses, and he is frustrated that he needs to pay everything. THIS is why I have 2 jobs, so I can pay bills in both places...

The situation is very complicated and frustrating, I mean, I have to pay like I am his wife, but when it comes to rights in that house, I'm not existing. It's him and his mother who rule.

Anyway, bottom line is that I had a ta;k with him last night, he doesn't understand what my problem is, I don't know what do do anymore!

You are right! The thing is, I've known this guy for so long, and I could've never imagined money can change a person like that. He makes me feel very obligated because I imigrated "the easy way", to a house and a car, I didn't have to start from zero, like he did. So that is the main reason, that now it is my turn to sacrifice.

Well, long story and painful, but thanks for the input and the answers from both of you!

To make this story short: I have two jobs, in order to be able to pay my debts and still make payments for the land I bought back home. He is not happy with the amount of money he gets from me, so he is giving me the silent treatment on a daily basis (he has one job, that pays him s**t, but won't consider a 2nd job). I am going to have a serious talk with him, tell him that this is not marriage, and he did not win me at the lottery, so I am not gonna be treated like that. Not to mention that when we filed for GC he had to sign that affidavit, stating that he assumes financial responsibility for me (even though, obviously, it is not the case).

My question: what if he decides I'm not useful for the amount of money he gets monthly from me, so he files for divorce??? Where am I standing? Can i lose my right to live here, be sent home like a "used wife" that he decided he won't need anymore ?