Dream'nJordan

I am absorbing EVERY word you're saying. I have a question for you, Dream'nJordan. Was his family SO VERY benevolent towards you in the beginning.... (sort of to the point of pulling wool over your eyes)?

His family is EVER so loving towards me. Now... I am developing a hind-sight about this whole "loving" thing.

Yours, E

His family was amazing to me all 3 times that I was there. But soon came to see and was told by some of his family and friends after I sent him back to Jordan, that they were happy to get rid of him because they were tired of supporting him. When I asked why they didnt warn me or tell me I got this response: 1. their loyalty was with him not me, and 2. they were tired of dealing with and supporting him,. Sad, sad, people. Think of it this way... do they really love you....or is it that they love you for taking him out of the country so they dont have to deal with him?

Know that I will respect the decision that you make, but I am praying for you, your safety, and sanity. Had it not been for my faith and my best friend....I would have lost my mind and ended up in jail after what he put me through.I am praying this doesnt happen to you.

Thank you for sharing your story! Im so sorry you went through all of that with a man that was supposed to love you but deceived you & used you. What the heck is wrong with a person to do things like that, is beyond my mind really! I hope the OP takes heart to what you went through & had her eyes wide open to the control & abuse thats being done from a distance & theres no such thing as it getting better or him changing. I hope she stops it NOW & cuts the cords! Let him fall on his backside & may he never come over here to make her life worse!

Thank you. I just dont want to see her make the same mistake that I did. It may hurt like hell going this far and then stopping everything, but its easier to stop it now. Once he gets here....you are stuck financially for two years. And she doesnt need to just walk away.......she needs to RUN and Dont look back.

I am so, so sorry to hear that you went through all that.

Thank you. Lesson learned, I am so much better off without him. I happy where I am at now.

Speaking from experience....I am scared for you. I am begging you to rethink this. Gone this far or not......think long and hard before you go through with this. The man I married was the sweetest guy ever until I found out who he really was. He started to change before the interview but I refused to see it. Not wanting me to talk to his friends, not wanting me to talk to mine, once he got here, things got sooooo much worse. I was mentally, emotionally, and physically abused. He controlled my every move and thought. Had a VERY strange obsession with my 12 year old daughter that he could not keep his hands off of ( Thank God she says nothing ever happened). My best friend tried to warn me, and I really wish I would have listened before I brought him here. He was here 5 months, wouldnt work, wouldnt help me with anything and treated me like I owed him everything....may I add that I paid for everything? The trips there, the hotels, the spending money, the food, the immigration process and even his ticket here. All he wanted to do was keep me at home, control me, and he could do whatever he wanted. Which was eat, sleep, and stay online all the time. I found porn on my internet, he was all the time in chat rooms talking to other women. When I finally had enough we called his family and told them to send him a ticket back home. But before he left, he made sure to downgrade me in front of my kids and threaten me that if I messed up his "plans", he still had family here in the U.S, that would make my life hell and meanwhile he would go home and be happy with his new wife from Egypt that was truly the one that he really loved and was one of the many that he was talking to when he was here in my home. BTW....he did marry her.....not even 3 months after he left the U.S. Bad news....even after writing everyone in the immigration process, telling them my story and sending them the divorce papers, my family and I are still legally responsible for him if he steps on U.S soil within the next 2 years. Im begging you ......PLZZZZZ Stop and think about this. What he is telling you to do is not right and its not love. Thats control!

Anna is right. Unless you have driven there...dont attempt to rent a car. The people there drive crazy. I think I had my eyes covered for most of my 1st and 2nd trip there. By the 3rd time I got used to it. Another thing she is right about is the kids. The kids look innocent and like they need the money. Although they might, the person they are working for doesnt.

Try not to show too much public affection. Its not looked upon highly at all.

Jordan is beautiful and one of the greatest places I have ever been. I was very welcomed and had the time of my life. Best place to stay is in West Amman. Taxis...just remember that the yellow ones are always cheaper than the white ones.

I have been to Jordan 3 times to see my husband, but we only stayed in 2 places. Razan Hotel by the Royal Hotel in the 3rd circle, we stayed at 2 times. It was 30 JD a night. They have a breakfast buffet, but if you are not arabic you probably wont eat it. lol. Its not all that bad but could be a lot cleaner...but the people that work there are very sweet. The lady that works during the day speaks English. Her name is Maria. The number there is 011-(962) 6 4649-3912.

the 3rd time I went, we stayed at Gondola Hotel and Suites. It was a little more expensive at 37 JD a night. Its in the 5th circle by the Four Seasons Hotel. The number there is 011-(962) 6-551-56-56. They also have a website: www.gondol.com

Both places had there advantages in being close to different places to eat or walk around.

It is nothing to see people walking around safely at 3 am. While you are there, you have to eat shawrma from Shawrma El Reem in the 2nd circle and go to the Dead Sea. You will have a blast I am sure. If you have any more questions feel free to ask, my husband is now here with me and would be happy to answer any questions you may have.

Its the security guard that answers the phone calls! You will be lucky to get to talk to someone in the Embassy! They are usually really good about responding to emails. Give them a day or two!

Congrats to you and your family! May God bless you all each and everyday!

Have a great time! Bring warm clothes for night. It was getting cool when I left last week.

When I went the first time my husband and I were not married yet, they let him carry my bags to my room, and then he had to go back down stairs. It is a strict country. We could hold hands in public, but as far as kissing or hugging....thats a no-no. A lot of the cheaper hotels will not let you stay together or even go to the same room without having proof of marriage. I've heard the 4 and 5 star hotels, dont check on the marriage, but are very expensive. About the visa problems, I really dont know anything about that. I dont want to give you any bad advice, not knowing. There is a guy on here called Lots of Patience, he is very knowledgeable on visas, you may want to ask him.

I dont know about that. That sounds crazy that she cant come to get you at the airport. I dont know about the restrictions on work visas. You are from the U.S. right? If you are, and all you are doing is visiting, all you need from here is a passport. You will get your visa stamp when you get off the plane in Jordan!( the U.S. doesnt care about ties that will bring you back, and honestly, they dont care if you ever come back, they just want to make it hard for people to get into the U.S. People visiting the U.S. have to have ties in their home countries, to assure the U.S. that they will return home and not stay here. Is she going to be able to spend time with you?

My best advice to you is contact a post office Monday morning, find out everything you need to bring with you, and get started on that. They are around 130.00 last time I checked. You should get it back in about 2 to 3 months ( if that long). Then you can plan your trip. GO and have a great time.......YOU WILL LOVE IT THERE!!!!!

I just got back from Jordan last Sunday. I love it there. I have been there 3 times to see my husband within a year. You are safe there. The people there are very friendly. But public affection is not allowed.

Why cant she come to get you at the airport? Who will? As far as getting lost.......more than likely you will. Amman is the biggest city I have ever seen, its like it never ends. Most of the people that I know have gotten there passport through the post office and they are easy to get. May take a little time to get them, so plan in advance to go ahead and get it. Give yourself about 3 months. Go to travel.state.gov They have a lot of information there to help you out. The visa you will get at the airport when you land in Jordan. I think its about 7jd. Is your girlfriend muslim?

Hi Amal! My husband grew up in Wadi al Seer, Jordan. he is still there. Interview has been set for Oct. 27th. Im going back to attend the interview with him. Hoping all goes well and he can come home with me. I have been to jordan two times......soon to be 3. We were married on Sept.7, 2009. Nice to meet you. Keep in touch.

I have had 3 friends go through JFK! All 3 went through just fine with no problems. 2 were fairly fast, the other one was slow because of international flights ahead of them. All 3 came from Islamic/Middle Eastern Countries! Congrats and best wishes to you both!

I wish I would have found VJ before hiring a lawyer! He did NOTHING!!!!!!! He left our case sitting in his office for almost 2 months after we had already paid NVC and then we had 2 RFE's, things he should have known we were supposed to send. I did all of the calling and emailing to NVC and the Embassy! Like I said, HE DID NOTHING!!!!!!!! You will find out quite a bit from here, just ask, if they dont know, someone will find out for you! Good luck with everything!

Hey mandyt! It would be easier for us to answer questions for you if you would plz fill in your timeline! When was your case completed? Go look at your country's portal page. Dont worry! When I looked, it seems that there is not a long wait time. Maybe a month to 2 months after case complete. NVC schedules all month long. Not just the 2nd week like they tell everyone. Just hang in there and stay positive. Jamaica looks like it goes pretty fast. Be thankful for this, I have seen others on here, waiting a year just for interview dates. I just recently got my interview date. My case complete was 4 months ago, and we have an October interview. So just stay positive. I will be saying a few prayers for ya too!

106 days after case complete and we have finally made it here!!!!!!!!! Interview set for Oct. 27th @ 8:30 a.m.! Thank you God!!!!!!

Congrats on case complete! Unfortunately, yes, you wait. NVC lies! They schedule interviews through out the whole month not just the second week like we are all told. They have already started scheduling for the month of October. If you look at some of the statuses you will see this. Call NVC back on Friday to see if they have you scheduled yet. Then if not call again next week. No one knows how long it will take for any of us to get interviews. Some wait a day or two, others, may take weeks, or months. Go look at your country's portal and go by the dates on there. I looked and by the dates given on there, it looks like you should have October interview, but again, it all depends on the capacity of the Embassy. I wish you luck.

awww! Thats great! Congrats!

We are all close knit! And you are more than welcome to butt in!!! They will take you in, just like they took me in! If you have any questions, do not hesitate to ask. There are so many people on here that are willing and wanting to help. You will have your ups and downs on here too with going through all of this craziness,so dont be afraid to vent, scream, or cry, because we have all been there! I wish you luck and a fast and successful journey!

I have a friend who's husband is Muslim. They were asked about their favorite position, and about oral sex. They got very personal with their questions. Their response was: "We feel what happens in private between us as a married couple, is none of your business. We mean no disrespect by answering this way." They didnt ask anymore personal questions and was given the visa without AP! The question about scars, I would answer them as honestly as possible, if they separate the two of you and you dont say the same things, then you might have problems!

I wish you luck!

We have an attorney....and all it has done was slow down the process. USCIS went pretty fast. But when my case was transferred to NVC, he sent me his bill and NVC sent me theirs. I paid them both the same day I received the emails, he let my case sit at NVC for 4 weeks without sending my case file to them. After 4 weeks of sitting here wondering why we hadnt gotten case complete or an interview date, his receptionist called to tell me that he forgot to send it. Then add another month onto that because we got 2 RFE's from things we needed not only from me here in the US, but from my husband in Jordan. (He is an attorney and should have known what all we needed to send the first time) I have had to be the one that has emailed the Embassy and the one that has done all the calling to NVC. He hasnt done anything. He might call me once every 3 weeks to see if I have heard anything, (i'm sorry, isnt that what I hired him for?) other than that.........NOTHING. Our case has been complete for 101 days today, and we still have no interview date, due to his lack of responsibility to his job.

If you have a simple case, lots of evidence, and a way to get on VJ, then you dont need one. VJ can help you out with filling out the papers, and if someone doesnt know, about 99% of them here will find out and then tell you. Also remember if something comes up and you need a lawyer later, you can always hire one then. Try to do this yourself, and with the help of VJ. I have a lot of friends on here that didnt use an attorney and they have made it through the journey just fine. I wish you luck with a happy and fast journey.

You are very welcome and thanks for the prayers.

You will definitely be in my prayers! Our case was complete May 18th, and we still do not have an interview date. It really all depends on how the Embassy schedules them. You may get lucky and get an October interview, but it all depends on the Embassy! I pray you will not wait as long as I have and some of the others on here. Looking at Pakistan's portal, it looks like wait time for interview is about 2 months after case complete. Hope this is right for you!

Dear DreamnJordan

Thanks for sharing. I'm glad your family is finally accepting and is adapting well. I began speaking to my family about Islam years ago and bought books, etc. But my family did the same, only different... for example my dad would print out articles about true stories- one was a heterosexual moroccan man who had a relationship with a French man so that he could move to France. Also stories about honor killings and that stories that say the religion supports beating women. Terrorist stories. My aunt recently told me I was dead to her and she didnt know me- three years ago she said " How can light have union with dark?" Another aunt told me, before I moved to Spain to be with my fiance, wrote me a letter to tell me I was throwing my life in the garbage by marrying him. They'll leave out evangelical books about Muslims turned Christians and at dinner they'll pray for my fiance's mortal soul that he doesnt burn in hell. It's ridiculous! I'm fed up!!!

I was just trying to help sweety! I hope you didnt take offense to anything I said. I, like you had the same thing with my mom who said he could get me over there and keep me and if I did anything wrong he could have me stoned to death or beat me and his family could kill us both if they didnt agree to this marriage. Not saying that there are not bad Muslims out, but there are also people who call themselves "Christians" that dont deserve to call themselves that. Again, total ignorance because they have not been there and experienced it first hand. You have some very other good ideas listed on here from others, what ever you decide to do, I do wish you the best! Take care!

People fear what they dont know. Just a suggestion, but if you printed out things about Islam and left them at their house, do you think they would read it? Or if you actually sat down with them and just told them what you are doing and how you feel, would they listen? If you educate them more maybe they wont put so much pressure on you. I had somewhat of a problem with all of my family and some of my friends when they found out that my now husband is Muslim. Mom wouldnt talk to me, Dad just shook his head. But after I printed out papers and talked with them about it, the more they eased up. Now they talk almost everyday to him on webcam. Just try! I wish you the best of luck. Take care!