myfakeID

it seems that it's possible to open a paypal account with a prepaid visa card: http://www.ehow.com/how_6361886_use-card-open-paypal-account.html

I'll leave it up to him to figure out how to get and use the money. I imagine he can transfer it to the card? I dunno.

Thanks!

Yes you are pretty much correct. The wait is between 11 and 23 years, depending on which country you are from. No need for picutres. They may ask for a DNA test if they doubt your paperwork (birthcerts etc).

How can I find out the more specific timeline by country? There's a big difference between 11 and 23 years (although both are a long time!)

Thank you so much!

I think she's very smart to come and ask advice before the problem gets out of control.

When my SO got here, my children just loved him! He wisely kind of stood back and let them get used to him before stepping into any sort of parental role. And even then, it was basically "listen to your mother".

After several years, though, the oldest had a change of heart, and has decided that she hates my husband - she refuses to live here because he's here. I would love for her to come back, as difficult as it was to deal with 2 people who don't get along, but she won't. Her father is encouraging her behavior. She even stopped talking to me for a while.

Some people might think I'm horrible for 'letting' him stay, but it's much more complicated than that. First of all, and most importantly, my other 2 children need him. They love him very very much, and he's extremely important to them. Their father is around, but not very emotionally warm or available. They (all 3) had a difficult time adjusting to their parents' divorce and remarriages. They (2 younger ones) love both step-parents, and if they lost any of the 4 of us (parents or step-parents), it would be devastating for them. The second most important reason (since the children ARE the most important part of this situation) is that my daughter's therapist (I wish she still had the same therapist! - that's a long story) said that especially with my daughter's personality, it would be a horrible idea to give her 'power' over others' lives. I agree - it doesn't make sense to disrupt 4 other people's lives so that one teenager can get her way. Of course, if there was a real reason, it would be different - and we'd figure out a way to cope. But since the two of them just don't get along right now, it wouldn't make sense. (see loved him when he got here, she disliked him for a little while a few years ago, then decided she liked him again, and now hates him - it's been back and forth with her)

(By the way, the children's father tried to get the school to change the oldest child's schedule because she "didn't like" one of her teachers. Seriously, does he plan to follow her around all of her life and 'fix' things, instead of trying to teach her how to get along with people?)

Then there are all the other reasons - like the fact that we love each other (of course), we jointly own the house and everything, he has nowhere else to go (neither do I, really - especially with children! - and no family members very close by), we are barely getting by with both incomes, etc. Seriously, he's a wonderful person - loving, kind, helpful... and he's been a good influence on all of us - giving me encouragement, for example. It was quite an adjustment for all of us, of course, and I think that he did well. But it really IS difficult for children of certain ages (pre-teen and teen especially) to adjust to having a new step-parent, and also difficult for someone to step into an already existing family - especially when they're changing countries, and have never been married before.

It sounds to me like the OP's husband and son aren't bad people - they're just going through a difficult adjustment period. I didn't hear anything that would warrant "getting rid of" the husband. It sounds to me like the husband isn't rejecting the son, he just doesn't want to "step on any toes". I think that's admirable, even if I don't agree - I think that having another adult in his life can be a wonderful thing. She can explain to her husband that he can be an addition to her son's life, and not worry that anyone will think he's trying to be a replacement for the father. I can see his point - I wouldn't like if my children's step-mother tried to take my place (for the record, I'm happy they have a female in their life who they love for those days I don't get to see them).

I don't recommend trying to get them to bond, though - you're right about that - that's something that needs to develop on its own. If your son feels like you're "making him" like his step-father, he's likely going to resist. Enjoy the fact that they're civil to each other, and (if I remember correctly) that your husband doesn't complain about your son in front of him. I do know how difficult it is to hear someone you love complain about someone else that you love. I don't have a solution for you, though. Except maybe to keep in mind that if your husband came from a less privileged background, it's difficult to deal with how spoiled your son must seem to him. I let my husband vent (when the kids weren't around, of course) about how much food they wasted, how much stuff they have (and didn't seem to care about) - because I know he didn't have much to eat or play with. It's funny - I think I expected my husband to be more appreciative of things that he was. It's not that he doesn't appreciate anything, it's just that I didn't expect him to be so... picky about things! For example, he won't eat leftover meat - he says it smells bad (even if it's the next day). And it took him FOREVER to find him shoes that he liked.

I don't know how long you've been divorced, or how long you've been remarried. Or the personalities of your son or husband. But I do understand (for what it's worth) that you're in a difficult, exhausting place. My best advice next time either of them starts is to say something like "I understand. You're entitled to your feelings, but I just can't listen right now. I'm sorry you feel that way about him, and I hope you two can continue to be polite to each other, and hope you get along some day soon." Is there someone else they can vent to? I hope it improves, and soon.

I DO think that figuring out a way for them to get along better is very important. I hate that my first born has pulled away from the family, and wish I knew how to change that. I know that most children 'leave' once they're 18 or so - and kind of start pulling away earlier than that so they can spend more time with their friends. I just didn't expect my daughter to stop living with me as a young teenager.

Best of luck to the OP, and anyone else having similar problems.

I am hoping someone can verify this, in case I got confused while I was looking this up. If someone gets citizenship, they can apply for their brothers and sisters to come here. The process for the paperwork takes... about 10 months? Then if approved, they are on a list? And the wait on that list is now about 11 years? So, once that paperwork is sent, it will take about 12 years before the brother(s)/sister(s) actually get here?

And the process is similar to one for other family based visas, except that the proof of relation is easier - you just need to prove that you are related, not have to show pictures or anything like that?

I'd like to figure it all out before starting the process, and make sure I know what I think I know!

Sorry it's taken me so long to get back online. I can only really get into this account at certain times, and I forgot my password and had to wait to get a new one. Limited access sucks.

Anyway, I appreciate the information. Yeah, I thought it might be a tax issue. That's something he'll need to look into.

In the meantime, I'm not sure how his brother will be able to get a paypal account. It looks like it's only possible to withdraw the funds through a credit card or a US bank account. He doesn't have either, so I guess figuring out how to get him one of those somehow is the next step. I'm not sure how to do it since he doesn't have a social security number. Maybe we can do some kind of loaded cards or whatever they're called. I wonder if that would work for paypal?

Oh well. I'll keep researching.

Thanks to both of you.

My husband's brother, in Morocco, has been doing some work over the internet for people (websites). My husband set it up so his brother's pay will go to his (own) Paypal account, and then he sends his brother the money through Moneygram. His brother doesn't have a bank account of his own, so this is the only way they could think of for his brother to get paid to do this work. Seems simple enough. However, I'm not very excited about this - I'm concerned it might create problems. For one thing, it might look like my husband is getting paid, and then would owe taxes on it. It's only been a few hundred dollars, but it's more the hassle than the amount. I also think it would be better for both of them if my brother in law could directly access his own money. This is nothing sinister - I just think it's one of those things that will end up causing problems. I tried to talk with my husband about it, but he's just getting upset and the conversation isn't going anywhere. I think it's because he doesn't have a solution, and doesn't want to admit that to me (one of his few flaws).

Ok, I could just deal with it, or keep pushing the issue with him. Either way, it will end up with an argument. Don't want or need that. So, instead of going down that path (one thing that's really making our marriage work is figuring out our problems and looking for solutions instead of getting upset and letting things blow up like we used to when he first got here), I thought I'd put the question out there to see if anyone else has some information that might work in this situation. My husband (and his family) never had any type of bank account in Morocco, and I certainly don't have a clue as to how to go about opening one there. I think it would be great if we could get his brother his own bank account and/or Paypal account so he can do this on his own. I don't know if there's a way for his brother to get a US bank account since he doesn't have a SS#, and I don't know if paypal (or something similar) works with Moroccan accounts.

I appreciate any information anyone has out there. I'll keep trying to find answers on my own. I just figured maybe a VJ member has already found something that works.

Thank you!

Ok, maybe I'm mistaken on some of this - if so, someone please correct me.

Once someone has a 10 year card, he/she can (for the most part) stay in the country. When applying for citizenship, there are some questions that are asked. Answering some of them "yes" could prevent someone from being granted citizenship. I think I heard that anything that results in a denial could possibly also result in deportation. Could that same reason cause deportation if the person did NOT apply for citizenship? In other words, could some people be better off staying a permanent resident instead of risking deportation by applying for citizenship? I would imagine anything like murder would result in deportation anyway. I mean less obvious things - more minor offenses, things like that.

I hope that makes sense. It's late and I'm tired.

Please, try to keep the responses helpful. I'm a USC, so none of this applies to me. It's a question of curiosity.

Thanks.

What about something you did but were not caught doing? For example - music file sharing. Most people who do it never get caught, and I'm sure there's some sort of statute of limitations on it. Even if there's not, I imagine whoever 'catches' people doing it gets them soon after they did it - not several years later. If someone didn't realize it was illegal, then stopped doing it once they found out it's not allowed, but were never caught, then does this need to be mentioned on the N-400?

The same with things like speeding. 'Everyone' does it, but not everyone gets caught. Even if you're caught, do you need to answer "yes" on the form? What if you're never caught?

Or should everyone check "yes" on the form, and when asked, mention things like speeding or not coming to a full stop at a stop sign? Will they think you're crazy, or laugh it off and move to the next question? Sometimes if you give a little information, it just causes problems. But technically, can ANYONE honestly answer "no' to that question?

Just curious.

This might sound silly, but what about the part where they ask if you've committed a crime for which you were not arrested - what if the person did something like music file sharing online?

I know of lots of Muslim women are or were married to non-Muslim men. I was born Muslim and Arab and was married to a Christian man for close to 30 years. Frankly, most Muslim women who wouldn't marry a non-Muslim man wouldn't want one who would marry a non-Muslim woman.

Sofiyya,

I can see that - makes sense in a way. Just curious (you don't have to share if you don't want, of course) if you had to deal with attitude for marrying a Christian. I heard that's strongly discouraged for Muslim women (not the men, though).

One reason this interests me is that my sister married a "black" man, and got some attitude about it from "black" women, who were upset about her (we're "white") taking one of 'their' men.

I think it's sad that so many people have the "us" and "them" mentality. We're all just humans, regardless of all those things that seem to worry so many of us (race, religion, looks, background, culture, whatever). It always bothered me how it's handled, but even more so now that I'm in what many would label a "mixed marriage". All the things that some feel will be the downfall of our marriage (I'm European white, raised Christian; he's a Muslim Arab, and looks 'darker') have not in the least affected our relationship negatively. Like many, we've had our adjustment issues, but they've been due to a new country for him - new way of life, new 'rules'.

Peace to all.

Thank you, everyone - I got lots of good ideas. We'll have to try them out now.

I wasn't planning to pay again to have his resume done - that was a waste of money, and (more than a year later) hasn't resulted in even one call. I think cover letters are a really good thing to mention - I was making the same mistake recently when trying for a job. I wasn't getting any responses until I started adding cover letters (it's easy to forget that when you're applying online).

Maybe the difficult job search is to "make up for" the relatively quick and pain free visa/green card process? just kidding

His English is really good, and he does have his GED and DL. I did find a place nearby that might be able to help him with this process. I just didn't realize how much was out there! I also found a volunteer job that he might be interested in. A paycheck would be really nice, but getting work experience is even more important right now. I never knew about apprenticeship programs - great idea! Also about putting "Mr." to indicate gender.

Temp agencies, job centers, etc - lots of good ideas. I will let everyone know how it works out for us. I hope all of this information helps the others who are in the same situation. Maybe we can all keep each other updated on our progress, and let everyone know what does and does not work.

Good luck to all!

Oh, and to the people who made jokes about it - thank you for taking away the edge to it. I really mean it - it's easier to deal with BS when we mock it! I hope it helped some people not take it seriously. I'm pretty emotional anyway, but when I was pregnant, it was even worse.

The only thing is, now some people (Charles! heehee) here have made me want to go make and eat some popcorn... and I really had enough to eat today. Plus, I should get to bed soon - hubby's up there waiting, and I have to get up relatively early tomorrow....

maybe just a little popcorn....

Peace to all....

http://www.***removed***/2006/05/fjordman...fine-print.html

yh good luck on saying no.

http://www.***removed***/2006/05/fjordman...fine-print.html

yh good luck on saying no.

Is Jihadwatch your source of knowledge about Islam?

oldahmed,

Now, there's a scary thought... I think believing what you read on that link is about the same as believing that all Muslims are terrorists, which you can see on other mindless ranting websites. I'm not Muslim, but I've been incensed by some of the ####### out there I see people posting about Muslims. Geez, I'm sure SOME Muslims are like the ones described there (you'll find scary people in every group), but I seriously doubt it's very many. My husband doesn't come even vaguely close to what I read on jihadwatch.

I was wondering, when reading through it, if it was actually written by a Muslim woman who has a problem with the fact that some Muslim men marry non-Muslim women (nothing against Muslim women - the ones I've met or talked to are very nice, just wondering about the person who wrote that link). Since they can't marry non-Muslim men, I imagine some would get really upset that the pool of possible husbands was being de-populated - what better way to put an end to it than to scare the ####### outta people. It's more likely it was written by someone who just hates Muslims, though. It's a shame it was posted here. And I hope that it didn't do any damage to anyone, other than the outrage that I know I felt. I really hope it didn't affect any of the non-Muslim spouses out there - esp pregnant ones - and/or the relationships any of them are in.

Sorry if I offended anyone - I didn't mean to. I think the people here are sweet and wonderful, helpful and supportive, almost without exception. Sometimes things don't come across the way I intend. I just get upset when I read ###### like that.

Sigh...

I really love my husband. Alot. I want to help him, but don't know how. He wants to find a job, but hasn't had any luck. He's been looking for a long time. What worries me is that he seems to think his name is the main reason no one is calling him for an interview. Yes, I'm sure it doesn't help having a "non-American" name, but I think his lack of education and work experience (here) is a big part of it as well. He doesn't seem to want to go to school. He's talked about it several times, but hasn't gone. He did get his GED, which helps, but it's really only a first step. I think he's worried he won't do well, and has also mentioned about the cost. I tried to explain that whatever is spent on education is made up with a decent job. He wants to open a store and sell things, but it takes money to do that, and we don't have 'extra'. I think he'd take a job if one was offered him. One problem is that I'm not up on the process - I'm not the person to go to if you need advice on how to write a resume, interview, or even where to look for jobs. I'm trying to learn. I just think, even if I knew more about the whole process, that it's not going to be easy for him to get a job, considering the economy, his lack of education, and his lack of experience. I've seen threads about where people first worked when they got here. He's applied "everywhere", and I think he's just doing something wrong - missing something or whatever. Oh, and we even went last year and paid to have a professional resume done for him. I think the guy who did it didn't do the best job, though - it seems too ... flowery or something.

I don't really know exactly what my question is. I'm just sad that I can't do anything about it, and don't know if anyone has any advice or anything.

He will have to wait until he becomes a citizen before he can get an American Passport right? So that would be awhile, two years after he gets his 10 year card or am I wrong?

I'm not sure how long it will take to get his citizenship after getting his 10 year card. Depends on when his ROC gets approved (we're still waiting), etc. His 2 year card expired in July (he does have his extension letter).

However.....

His passport expires in a few months. Yes, he does have to wait until he gets citizenship to apply for a US passport, and he can't even apply for that until next year. Once he applies, I don't know how long it takes to get citizenship and do whatever else (?) needs to be done in order to apply for the US passport. Add on time waiting to actually get the passport after applying .... so yeah, it could easily be a year or even 2 total without a valid passport. I could understand him not wanting to bother if there was a chance he'd get the US passport before (or very shortly after) his Moroccan one expired, but it's not even close.

Nope it could be only a few months even. My husband actually got his 10 yr card in July but we can apply this month for citizenship. All depends on how long processing takes.

Good luck with citizenship!

Did you tell him that your concern was about a possible emergency in the future? Maybe he didn't think of that? Depending on how long he's been here, or his job status, maybe he doesn't have enough money and is ashamed to come out and say, "I can't afford it right now" - or maybe he feels that his money needs to go to more "useful" things. I'm not sure, but I think he will need a valid passport if he has to renew or extend his visa, etc. Maybe someone else knows better. Perhaps you can convince him by telling him that he needs to do it for USCIS????

I will definitely bring up the emergency angle. The money isn't really the issue, I don't think. Hard to say - sometimes he has no problems spending money, and other times, he gets all tight fisted about it. It might just be that I brought it up when he didn't want to talk about it.

Sigh.

Thanks to everyone for your advice. If I can convince him, I'll let everyone know!

We bought a ticket for my husband to go back to Morocco, then when we looked for his passport we couldn't find it. I can't tell you how stressful that was! We had a hard time finding the correct embassy that would help us, but my husband finally did contact the correct one (Washington? Can't remember now). First off we need to register him at the consulate. They never said anything about registering the marriage, and I don't see why that would matter since it is registered in Morocco. Second we needed to send in the necessary items for the passport. For us we needed a police report showing that the passport was lost (that was the difficult part), the fees, and a prepaid express mail envelope. Those were a bit pricey, and although we were able to send the registration and the passport renewal request together, we weren't sure if we had to send 2 prepaid envelopes. So to be on the safe side, since we were dealing with a time limit, we sent 2. We mailed the packet on Monday, and we had his registration and the passport by Friday. I was amazed and relieved!

It does seem rather odd that he doesn't want to renew it, but to be honest I wouldn't force the issue. He is a full grown man, and if by chance something happens that he needs it and doesn't have it then who will he have to blame? Sometimes we must let them take their hard knocks for them to understand.

Yikes! I couldn't imagine the stress of losing a passport! We make sure to keep ours in a safe, so I don't have to worry so much. Our marriage, as far as I know, isn't registered in Morocco, though - we were married here. I heard it's a good idea to register the marriage for when we travel in Morocco. There might have been other reasons I heard, but I don't remember them all right now.

Yes, I realize I need to stop trying to protect him. At the same time, his headaches often become mine (he gets moody, and my kids and I don't need that). Plus, if he waits and then needs to get it 'renewed' or whatever after it expires, I'm sure it will be more expensive - and the extra cost comes out of our money. Also, it will basically ruin all chances of going to visit him family any time soon. I would really like to go, and don't want to wait until he gets his American passport. I suppose I could go alone, but... well, there's the language barrier (I'm still learning the language, and he's the only one in his family who really knows English), and just my general nervousness about traveling alone. (yeah - weird - but it didn't feel like I'd be traveling alone when I went to see him before the visa).

Sigh... I'm just looking for something quick and easy to tell him to convince him that he wants to do it. Y'know - avoid the BS. There have been a few things in our lives that have already complicated things enough, and I'm looking for a few breaks. I don't want to go into it, but it mainly has to do with my ex complicating things - and the lawyers and related bills are a little overwhelming. I know you've gone through quite a bit of ####### yourself with immigration, which wasn't your fault, so you probably understand. I just want to make whatever I can as easy as I can. I have been learning to force myself to let him make some mistakes. This is just one I'd rather avoid. It's good to be reminded to let him fend for himself sometimes, though - so thank you for that!

it is a sweet thing that you are worried about the situation if he has leave urgently.but keep in mind leaving won,t be the issue comming back will, and he can always wait 2 to 3 months for his passport to be renewed in his home country to be able to come back.just tell him that and he will agree with you and renow it here. best of luck

Thank you - I will definitely bring that up!

The only thing is it pretty much rules out going there to visit next summer, which I was really hoping to do... unless I can convince him to renew it. I imagine it's SO much easier to renew an UNEXPIRED passport!

You can register and renew your passport via mail with the Moroccan Consulate simultaneously. There is no need to register the marriage in order to renew the passport.

Good - as much as I'd like him to register the marriage, it's more important to renew the passport in my opinion. Also, if I let him know that, maybe he'll be more likely to renew...

Thank you!

Hi,

No, there is no need to have the foreign passport to be valid to get US citizenship, although it is certainly a good idea for any foreign national to have a valid passport when they are not in their home country. He does need to keep his expired passports, however, as they will show evidence of any travel out of the US, and this information is required for the citizenship process. You need to show evidence of any time spent out of the country on either short trips or longer visits that may impact residency eligibility, so keep the expired passports available. Not having a valid passport will definitely impact on any travel plans you might have, and if there is an emergency back home he would need to get some sort of an emergency passport from his home country's Embassy before he could travel.

No, there is no need for the GC holder to be employed, however he will be asked for an employment history. He can write 'none' or 'unemployed' if that is the case. The USC signed an affidavit of support which is no longer in effect when the GC holder becomes a citizen so you may need to address this. If the two of you have worked out an arrangement that works for you, and do not use means tested benefits there is no need for the GC holder to be employed in order to qualify for citizenship.

Hope this helps.

Thank you so much! Like I said, I couldn't find this information. I agree - he really should renew his passport. I'm trying to talk him into it and can't figure out why he doesn't want to do it. Sigh. He's really sweet and wonderful, but sometimes decides to be stubborn about something for some reason I can't fathom... and if I push, then forget about it. I figure if I can find out some reason he HAS to do it, then he will.

I wasn't sure what you meant when you wrote "The USC signed an affidavit of support which is no longer in effect when the GC holder becomes a citizen so you may need to address this." Address it with him, or with USCIS? We don't use any type of benefits, so that's not an issue. He did work for a short time, and has been trying to do something from home since he got here. He just hasn't turned a profit yet.

Again, thank you so much for the information!

Not sure why you have to hide your identity to ask those questions, anyway. here is what you need

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...alization_guide

I wanted to be anonymous because I don't want people who know me here under my usual name to think badly of my husband for not working. It bothers him alot that he can't find a job, and he also doesn't want people to know personal information about us. I don't really either, but figure it's not too bad if no one has a clue who we are.

Also, I did look through the guides - just didn't see anything about passports or employment. Either it's not in there, or I missed it somehow....

I don't want to fill in my timeline because I already did in my usual account - I figuring filling one in would make things inaccurate since I'd be doubly represented, and I'll make sure not to ask questions without providing any information necessary for answering them.

This is my account for asking questions without anyone knowing who I am...

Anyway, I was wondering about certain things in relation to naturalization. I read through the information provided, but still have some questions - didn't see these things addressed anywhere.

1 - Does the GC holder need a valid passport to apply for and/or be granted citizenship?

2 - Does the GC holder need to be employed? If the USC has a job or some kind of income, is that ok? Or does the GC holder need to show past and/or current U.S. employment at the time of applying or after applying/before the oath? I figure maybe the government might be hesitant to grant citizenship to someone who doesn't have a solid work history.

Sorry for the secrecy.

Hi everyone! I've been a member for a while, but opened a new account. I want the freedom to post questions without my SO knowing that it's me. I love him dearly, but... he's stubborn sometimes, and very sensitive.

Ok, I brought this up to him before, and he got upset about it (I have no idea why), and wouldn't discuss it with me. It's his passport - it's going to expire in a few months, and he doesn't want to renew it. He says he doesn't want to leave the country until he gets his 10 year card, which I understand - even though you can come back in with an expired card and an extension letter, he's nervous about doing so. The thing is, if he doesn't renew, he won't be able to leave the country (and return) until he gets an American passport, which will be a minimum of a year (and most likely longer). First of all, I was hoping to travel next summer. Second of all, you never know what could happen, and I'd hate for him not to be able to go see his family if (God forbid) there was some kind of emergency. Also, I wonder about things like getting a stamp in his passport if his letter expires, and does he need a valid passport for any reason for citizenship or anything like that? I mean, I just can't fathom why someone would willingly let themselves be without a valid passport - at least someone who came on a visa, anyway... I know people can forget, or maybe find themselves in a situation where they don't have the money or something - but to just decide you're not going to renew (and not even give a reason why) seems irresponsible.

The ONLY thing I can think of while racking my brain is that I remember a conversation I had with him about marrying Islamically and registering with the consulate here. I'm under the impression he needs to do that to renew - and he didn't seem interested in doing that for whatever reason.

I don't know. I love him, and he's wonderful. But every once in a while.... let's just say I get frustrated.

sigh