Hokie97

Why were you going to pay his immigration expenses? i think you spoilled him and he got used to you paying his stuffs. My wife (USC) paid fees for the '' K1 '' and when i came here i have been paying fees for AOS, ROC and now N400, and i am sooo ok with that because it's my responsability to pay for those things as i am the beneficiary. Anyway, i hope you will get stronger and move on, you will find someone else and there are plenty of kids that need someone to love them.

He didn't have any money. I immigrated to England first and had to pay my own expenses for that. Then when we decided to move to the US, either I had to pay to get the family here or we had to stay there, and we thought that the kids being educated in the US would be better for them. He only found part time work here, as he had no particular job skills (had been on single parent benefits in England for 6 years after his first wife died). In order to keep them in the US next summer, I'd have had to pay for their 10 year greencards. It was a fact of life that I was willing to do because I loved them so much.

I did spoil him. I sacrificed a lot myself and I was happy to because I enjoyed making them happy. Now I am learning to spoil myself again, and it's actually a hard habit to break, the "I don't need that" mindset, and buying something or doing something just because I want to. I do believe that I will find love again. But if I don't, I guess I am okay with that too. I was happy before I met him, and I'll be happy again. I will always consider the children "mine." They still call me mom and talk non stop about coming to visit me in the spring. My daughter and I talk for hours once or more times a week. I won't ditch them just because he's ditched me. His new girl is paying his way for everything now, from moving them across country to I can only assume his green card next summer, as he seems to be off work more than he's at work some weeks. But that's not my problem to worry about now.

I am wondering about this situation and the green card.

Usually a conditional permanent resident status needs to be reviewed in 2 years or so. That is how it is in our situation. That being the case, if conditions are not met or if the resident does not attend the required meeting, seems to me that the card would not be renewed and perhaps the visa process cancelled? Just thinking out loud here perhaps someone else knows more?

Damon

From all that I have read online on message boards and the official sites, they rarely refuse anyone a 10 year greencard. In England, you have to prove at 24 months that you're still married or you're out, because you're there on a visa. But in the US, the visa only gets you in the door, and your greencard keeps you here. It's more complicated than that, but after too many hours researching, I have come to terms with the fact that my husband might never have cared about me.

Our divorce should be final in the next month or so, and I am pretty sure he's going to be married by the time his greencard expires to the girl who took him in and has been supporting him since he left me. I have had to deal with a lot of sorrow these last 8 months, but the small things to be grateful for are, at least he left before I paid for his 10 year green card next summer and his citizenship the following summer. For him and my step kids. I'd have done anything for the children. We still talk a couple times a week and they'll be spending next summer with me. They call me mom and I consider them my children. Let her pay all their expenses. She deserves to lose everything just like I have.

Looks like he can prove the marriage was entered on good faith, unless you know more info then you are divulging here, most likely he will be able to ROC, if needed.

Please remember - he only needs to prove it was "entered" on good faith - there are no requirements to have a happy marriage, or stay together for the period.

Like others mentioned, if he pulls means tested benifits, the US/State/Local governement may come after you/Dad for re-payment.

Does he still pull the widow pay from the UK? If he does, that will count as income, and if the above rare thing happens, would be deducted from any total amount. (again - very rare, you can count the cases on your hands).

I understand that about entering and I know a lot of marriages do fail. I am just shell shocked and having trouble sorting through things right now.

It seems that there should be some sort of out for the support. I know there isn't, but I dragged my family into this "in good faith" because I thought we were going to be together forever. The only one being punished in this circumstance is me (financially and emotionally) and the children (emotionally).

He does not still get pay from the UK.

I will keep all of this in mind. Thank you very much for your input.

It's until HE has worked 40 quarters, or you or he dies, or he (and the kids) become USCs, or he leaves the US and gives up his GC (kids as well).

Whether he used you or not is something only you can really know. How was he when you moved to the UK? Were you the person driving your immigration there? You weren't there very long so why did you move back to the US so quick? If his goal was to really move to the US why did you go to the UK first and him not come to the US? Did his kids need to really get to know you first? You said he wasn't working when you moved there BUT he was getting money from the government. I don't know how much that was but do you feel like it's enough that he would have survived well on it? I get the feeling you were the driving force behind the relationship and he just doesn't care enough about you. I'm not sure if you were "used" per se, but it certainly does look like he figured "what the hell, I like her so may as well move to the US while I can". I doubt there was any malicious intent (yet!) but I just don't think he loved you and instead just went with the flow.

Thank you for explaining the 40 quarters. I did not understand all of that before.

We thought it would be good for the children for us not to uproot their lives so much right off the bat, which was one of the main reasons I moved there. Also, we had dreams of traveling while I was there. Our original plan was to stay for four years. I would get my citizenship in three, and we'd move the next year. But there was a math error in how old the children would be, and it made financial and educational sense to move. I was the only one of us who did not want to move sooner rather than later, but I agreed to it. I did all of the immigration work in both directions.

He had not been working since 2001 when he became a full time single parent, but with the age of his son, he was going to have to start working based on the benefits rules in place, so his life was going to change and he was going to have to start working whether in the US or UK.

We talked a long time the day I posted in this thread. He has explained a lot of things to me. At this time, I do not think that he used me, but I did find out about some things he lied about. Despite those lies, I love him and still want to spend the rest of my life with him. But I understand that is not only up to me. But he's pretty sure he's going to move across the country to live with the only other person he knows in the US - a woman - and they only met once at our wedding. I am so worried about my children (step-children). It is not fair that I have no say in their lives because we moved before I could adopt them.

I have recently also found out that he has been talking to other women even before he left my home. I am so conflicted on what to do. I know my head tells me to turn hm in and divorce him but my heart wont let me. I am so stupid I have now let him back in my home again. I wish I was stronger. I hope that you make the right choices and that all will be well with you soon. I'm a friend if you need one..............

I found out last night that my husband has been texting a girl he knew before me (also a USC) since December. She was making inappropriate comments to him (how she loved him with all her heart and he was her best friend in the world) after we got married and it nearly broke us up then. My friends tell me I am strong, but I feel so weak and I love him so much that I would take him back. Of course, then he might just leave again and where would I be? But I miss my children. He said last night his only option is to move across the country because she has offered him a place to stay because where he is now he cannot stay past May 1st. Worse than losing him is losing access to my children because they are my step children and I have no legal right to them in the US. In England I had a parental responsibility order, but we did not have time for me to adopt them. I am kicking myself for not making it work so that I would be able to share their lives.

I don't have a clue whether or not your husband used you to get a Green Card, but I wonder how you came up with those 9 more years thingi?

Unless he works full time, you'll support him and the children until the day they die, get deported, or become US citizens. I don't know how you can assign the number 9 to that?

I thought I remembered the form for support being for 10 years. But it has been a while since I filled it out.

This is really hard to put into words, but I have been reading post after post that are several years old and I just need some clarification.

My husband and I got married in Feb 2009 and I immigrated to the UK because that would be easier for his two children. We decided to move to the US and they immigrated with CR-2/CR-1 visas and we settled here June 2010. My father and I co-sponsored their visas with Affidavit of Supports.

Now my husband has said he does not want to live the rest of his life with me and has moved out with his children. After living two years with them, they feel as much like my children as birth children could. I am heartbroken, as I never saw this happening.

My husband did not work in the UK (he was a widow and his benefits paid for him to stay home with the children while they were growing up), so he does not have a skill set or degree. And with two children to care for, I am worried about us having to support him for the next 9 years.

I know that he can remove his conditions himself if he can prove that he married me in good faith, and he could probably get a couple of people to say that he did. At the time I thought that he did too. But he is not giving me a reason for walking out, and it is making me doubt our entire three year relationship. I paid to go visit him in England. I paid for him to come to the US for our wedding. I paid for our wedding and "honeymoon." I paid for my immigration to the UK, I transferred my money to England to purchase new appliances (even before we were married) and I helped support us when his benefits did not cover all of our expenses. I paid for their immigration to the US and I paid off his credit card debt that he had prior to our marriage before we moved. When we got the US, I paid for us to live until we found work.

He needs to prove that he did marry me in good faith, but do I have the right/ability to refute it?

At the time I did not mind spending money on our family, but if I was being manipulated, that just adds insult to injury. My husband has always been vocal about wanting to live in the US since he was a child, and I have it written in emails to me when we first met. He has completely barricaded the children away from me at this point and they are living with a friend. I can hardly function on a day to day basis.

I have spent $20,000 on us and our relationship in the last three years and to be tied to him financially for another 9 years (and to have my father be as well) is adding insult to injury. This isn't me being bitter or angry, because I am not. I would take him back in a heartbeat, but he says he does not want to try and that is all he will tell me. The children's lives (15yo&13yo now) were much better here in the US, but with him not having many prospects, I feel that they would be better off back in the UK where their grandparents could help support them. They were concerned about us moving here, and it is doubtful they'd send him money to support the three of them here.

Our story is a bit more complicated than this, but I think this should be enough without writing a book.

Thank you in advance for any suggestions or input you may have.

I am so sorry this is happening to you. My husband (UK Citizen) just walked out on my and my two step children, after being in the US less than 1 year. I am just now looking into the consequences of this just like you are.

Just thought I'd post here about a confusion I've overcome...

I was fairly sure that I was expected to fill in both parts of the DS230 and send it back to the VISA branch, then at a later date submit the ds2001 and await an interview. The instructions sent to me however suggest that I fill everything in, collect all the documents and only send the DS2001 back.

I got into trouble with this as well. I had all the forms and filled them in, but only sent the ds2001 in. 30 days later I got the letter saying they needed ds230 pt1 for each of my family members. 30 days after that I got my interview date. I could've had the interview and been done with the waiting if not for me messing it up. I felt so bad having to explain to my husband why we were delayed.

Thank you for the very useful and comprehensive info Well, I'll be at home a lot of the time until I can get a job, so of course I'm going to have to keep myself occupied (After I've done the housework, mind...)

The Wii is 230v I think - can't remember off the top of my head. However I remember that it isn't variable. So it sounds like I'll need a converter. I'll start looking into that.

You're welcome. I've learned so much on these boards, I love being able to give back something.

When i go the states i just use a plug adapter to charge my nintendo ds it works fine. I use it for my fone an everythin

Thanks for the info. The back of the DS only says something like amps (can't remember right now) so I wasn't sure, and the manual wasn't terribly helpful.

Well... I know that my camera will charge up ok. I'll have to check my Wii but as far I know it will be fine. Hey, I've got my Sega Genesis in the loft, and my N64... and my Gamecube console. (The GC games are coming with me as they are forwards compatible with the Wii.)

Hmm. I will have to double check. If it works, I won't be able to play US games on it, but I've got a lot of games for my GC/Wii, so to me it's worth it.

230v~50hz, says on the power pack. I guess I'll need to get an adapter for it.

There are power plug adapters, which are under $10 and they just allow you to plug one type of plug into the other. That's what I use for my US laptop here in England. It was a multi switch so we also used it in Sweden for my husband's UK cell phone. You can use a plug adapter if the voltage is 110-230. We'll use it for the UK laptop when we move back to the US.

If the voltage is just 230, then you need a step down converter (converts 240 to 110). Those can be quite expensive. I learned a lot from this website: http://www.voltageconverters.com/ I emailed them about the converter, and they explained that all I needed was a plug adapter because of the variable voltage. I did not end up buying from them because it was $3.xx and shipping was $8, but the same thing was at Walmart for $8. If your game says 230v on the back, I think you'll need a converter. You're likely to get your money's worth out of the converter, because you'll probably play more than my son. My son has a nintendo ds-lite, and he says he only needs a plug adapter, but I haven't been able to corroborate that in the manual. I guess we'll see when the fuse blows (or the ds). But either way, we are not buying a $60 converter for it.

For going the other way, there are step up converters that change 110 to 240.

Thanks for your reply elmcitymaven.

I printed it out and started to fill it in, but because he's on benefits we don't pay anything, it's paid for him. I didn't know if they'd hunt you down if you didn't fill it out. We will call them to let them know we are moving so the benefits stop, but like you and BT, I'm afraid if we tell them too soon they'll cut off benefits before we move, and that would be bad! They've currently screwed up and we haven't been paid on time the last three pay days.

We get a lot of telemarketers, and we let them go on and on with their spiel. Then we say we are moving, so we aren't interested. Then they offer to be our cable/phone/whatever provider where we move. It's fun to say, well, we're moving to America, can you help us there? They usually hang up. It's sad that it entertains us, but it does.

There is a P85 form here: http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/nonresidents/tmaleaving-the-uk.shtml

Im not sure how far it is, but my plan is to jump on the tube at kingcross station and get off at oxford circus and walk from there.. its probably a 15 min journey on the tube and about the same walking to the embassy from oxford circus.. i dont know the exact time.. google says walking time is 40mins..

You could change at oxford circus and get the tube to bond street which is about the closest tube station but its hardly worth bothering in my opinion..

We got took the circle line from kings cross to baker street then took something to bond street. It was a right pain!

We stayed at the Travelodge Kings Cross two weeks ago. It is nothing special, old and a little decrepit. However, it was clean! And the bed was comfortable enough. It was about a 5 minute walk, and that was mostly waiting to cross the roads. It took us longer than I thought it would to get to the Embassy, though. We left the hotel at 7:15 hoping to get to the embassy at 8 (we had to go to the pharmacy to drop off a phone and camera). We ended up getting in line at 8:20 for our 9 o'clock appointment. It's easily worth £50. I think our two nights were £69 and £85. We were quite limited in our choices though, because we have two teenagers and there do not seem to be a lot of family friendly hotels in our budget, and we could not afford to swing two rooms.

Hey everyone. We are in the process of booking our tickets to the US for June. Yay! But I want to make sure we do everything right before/during the move.

I know there is a form that my husband is suppose to fill out, but I printed it out and none of it applies to him. He's been on benefits since 2001, so he doesn't pay council tax or income tax or anything because he's been on housing benefit and single parent benefit. Until I got here and how he is on disability benefit. As soon as we book our tickets, he'll be calling all of those departments to inform them, but is there anything else we should be doing?

Also, has anyone had their mail forwarded to the US (or another country for that matter)? It's really expensive, and we don't get much anyway, but I didn't know if the UK Government and the utility people would allow us to have a US address for our last bills?

Hey Matt, I didn't get an alert that anyone had replied to this thread. As far as x-rays, that's x-ray plates, not x-rays. Once x-ray film has been developed radiation won't affect it. It's undeveloped film that will be affected.

With your electronics, will they even work in the US? My son is having to leave behind his playstation2 (we're in the dark ages) because it doesn't have variable current. I won't spend $60 on a step up converter for a game that old. According to the manual for his Nintendo DS lite we can just get a $5-10 plug adapter. That's what I use for my laptop, because it's variable power 110-240v.

It's not trivial to want to take some things with you. When I came to England last year I only brought my suitcases with clothes, a photo album and my laptop. It was really hard here initially, living in someone else's home (my husband's). I felt like a guest because the kids did their thing and spread all over the house, my husband had his desk all set up, and I didn't have a place of my own. The kid's computer was in his/our bedroom (it was his tv at night), but after about a month I asked him to move it into one of their rooms because I did not have a place to call my own (tiny house!). Whoever wasn't on the computer in our room was on the couch in the living room, so there was no where for me to go when I just needed some quiet time. It's hard, even though you'll be so happy to be together. But it is worth it.

Thanks. I guess I just assumed regular taxis would be outrageous. I've contacted a few. A regular car to there is about £90, but because there are 4 of us and 6 suitcases plus carry ons we need a van and that's about £130. Still better than the train and dealing with getting from St. Pancras to Heathrow.

I am looking for recommendations of companies to use to drive us from Leicester to Heathrow.

We do not drive, and there are 4 of us, so I'd rather not take the bus or train as we'll have to deal with luggage and transfers and it just seems like a nightmare. I got a slip through the door the other week advertising long distance transport by van to the airport for "from £60". It sounds like it could be a good deal, but since they solicited us and there are numerous spelling mistakes on the ad, I am a hesitant to book with them. I am currently calling around to some local taxi companies, but I thought I would see if anyone else has gone this route. Thanks.

That's wonderful news Amy & Michael. You've got an extremely busy summer coming up!

Ah that clears it up thanks!

Im also assuming im going to have to fork out for the new visa fee ($350) rather than the old price, even through we started before they changed it? Oh, and can I take a book in with me to read while I wait.. they didn't mention it on the website lol

Thanks again

Congrats MJM!

I'm not sure about your price I had to pay $400x3 for a CR1 and two CR2s. It was painful to sign that credit card slip!

The website says no backpacks, but there were people there with them. I took a large purse type thing for my documents and snacks, my daughter took a fairly large purse. We all took books and sandwiches and snacks. I've heard that if you take drink in they ask you to drink some in the security booth before they let you in. We didn't want to be dealing with that (times the 4 of us), plus the extra weight on the underground, so I bought us all drinks in there. A bottle of water is £1. They have canned sodas for .80p I think. I've seen worse prices. They also have crisps and premade/prepackaged sandwiches.

Just received packet 4 / appointment date letter through the post and I was intending on taking my mum/stepdad (who's a U.S citizen) to the interview with me to keep me company, however on the letter it states - " if you need to bring a carer, translator or U.S Citizen spouse/fiance(e) to assist you during your time at the embassy, please send us their full names as soon as possible so that we may arrange their access to the embassy."

So does this apply to anyone I bring with me to the embassy, or just thoes that are involved with the visa application?

Thanks!

Anyone. That being said, I had written on the ds2001 (all three of them) that I was going to be there and had written it in the email when I changed my date. My name wasn't on either of our sets of appointment letters. Supposedly there is a list that anyone not being interviewed has to have their name on to get in. The people at the first check station verified my identity and wrote my name on one of the three letters to get me in. They didn't seem bothered, and they did not consult any list. They will both need to have their US passports with them.

This is my first time posting to this thread...but you can add us to the June interviews! June 8

Welcome. June 8th is the date we're probably moving. If I get on the ball and book our tickets!

Ok, visa arrived today after sending back extra docs. DONE!

Total time from start to finish: 8 months 20 days.

SunDrop you can update your timeline now too if you wish

Thanks to everyone on this forum for their support throughout this process.

Excellent!

Mine arrived this morning

Exciting for both of you. It's such a relief to be told yes, but having it in your hand is soooo much better!

jhphi - How strange about the tax forms. I had three years of tax transcripts and this 2009's hand written one. I was expecting to have the interview before my taxes were due this year, so I only had print outs of the W2s (my dad had scanned and emailed them to me). They didn't have a problem with that. I did have zeroxes of my dad's returns, as we don't have employment lined up when we move. She looked through your packet of domicile? My guy only needed one thing, though I handed over two and my letter of intent. I had dozens of documents, but he didn't want to see them.

I'm glad your day was so quick.

Hokie, did your package every arrive? I got an sms yesterday as well that the passport would arrive today. My wife took off work and waited at the house ALL day, with the door open, never leaving the house, and they didn't come, even though their website boldly claims "delivery attempted"!!!

They delivered about 10:30 on Wednesday. I stayed home from the kid's school review appointment while my husband went, and it's a good thing because it arrived right in the middle of when they were gone.

Have you gotten it re-delivered yet?