Bajih

It has been a while since I have been on Visa Journey, and I have to say that my kids had (and are having) a hard time adjusting. I am surprised that more people haven't had similar experiences, but maybe it is a taboo topic to admit things are not always peachy.My kids were 11 and 17 when my husband came to the US. They both knew of him for two years prior to that and have talked via Skype. (more my daughter than son). Things seemed like they would be okay....but i wasn't ready for the cultural shock and adjustment period we would all need. I kept that in mind that first year.. There were just so many things we had to learn from each other, being online is not living with someone day in and day out..no matter how well you know them. We are still learning and I think this is healthy for us. My daughter is in counseling and I hope she can work out her feelings there.. My husband and I are doing great...and I constantly keep the lines of communication open for my daughter and son to talk to me about anything. I think you have to keep it real.. There will be an adjustment period and this is not only okay, it is normal. It is okay if not everyone in the family is singing odes of joy to each other all of the time. Relationships take hard work. My kids know they are unconditionally loved . That, in itself, is the greatest gift I can give them. Freedom to be who they are and to feel what they do. Would I like them to eventually have a close relationship with my husband? Sure. But in their own time....and we have plenty of time....
Feels food to be back on Visa Journey and to hear all of your stories. It reminds me that I am not alone...
bajih

It has been a while since I have been on Visa Journey, and I have to say that my kids had (and are having) a hard time adjusting. I am surprised that more people haven't had similar experiences, but maybe it is a taboo topic to admit things are not always peachy.My kids were 11 and 17 when my husband came to the US. They both knew of him for two years prior to that and have talked via Skype. (more my daughter than son). Things seemed like they would be okay....but i wasn't ready for the cultural shock and adjustment period we would all need. I kept that in mind that first year.. There were just so many things we had to learn from each other, being online is not living with someone day in and day out..no matter how well you know them. We are still learning and I think this is healthy for us. My daughter is in counseling and I hope she can work out her feelings there.. My husband and I are doing great...and I constantly keep the lines of communication open for my daughter and son to talk to me about anything. I think you have to keep it real.. There will be an adjustment period and this is not only okay, it is normal. It is okay if not everyone in the family is singing odes of joy to each other all of the time. Relationships take hard work. My kids know they are unconditionally loved . That, in itself, is the greatest gift I can give them. Freedom to be who they are and to feel what they do. Would I like them to eventually have a close relationship with my husband? Sure. But in their own time....and we have plenty of time....
Feels food to be back on Visa Journey and to hear all of your stories. It reminds me that I am not alone...
bajih

It has been a while since I have been on Visa Journey, and I have to say that my kids had (and are having) a hard time adjusting. I am surprised that more people haven't had similar experiences, but maybe it is a taboo topic to admit things are not always peachy.My kids were 11 and 17 when my husband came to the US. They both knew of him for two years prior to that and have talked via Skype. (more my daughter than son). Things seemed like they would be okay....but i wasn't ready for the cultural shock and adjustment period we would all need. I kept that in mind that first year.. There were just so many things we had to learn from each other, being online is not living with someone day in and day out..no matter how well you know them. We are still learning and I think this is healthy for us. My daughter is in counseling and I hope she can work out her feelings there.. My husband and I are doing great...and I constantly keep the lines of communication open for my daughter and son to talk to me about anything. I think you have to keep it real.. There will be an adjustment period and this is not only okay, it is normal. It is okay if not everyone in the family is singing odes of joy to each other all of the time. Relationships take hard work. My kids know they are unconditionally loved . That, in itself, is the greatest gift I can give them. Freedom to be who they are and to feel what they do. Would I like them to eventually have a close relationship with my husband? Sure. But in their own time....and we have plenty of time....
Feels food to be back on Visa Journey and to hear all of your stories. It reminds me that I am not alone...
bajih

Hi! Our interview was at the end of July. I had prepared everything. I spent quite a lot of time getting it all together. I had to get my divorce papers certified; he had to get his birth certificate translated again; we had to make sure he was on everything we could get him on in terms of accounts and such...
Our interview took 5 minutes. In that time, the interviewer asked my husband a few general questions (military service and about his son). That was it. He did not ask us ANYTHING about us. He did not look at anything I brought in. (original documents and copies all orderly arranged in a folder) While I was excited that we passed and he said "congratulations", a little part of me questioned why I did all of this work and spent all of this money for nothing. I thought this "interview" was to verify OUR marriage and that it was a real marriage. Not one question about us. Go figure.
I put it all in my fire-proof vault to bring out when we apply for citizenship in 2 years.
Green card came in the mail 2 weeks later. Hurray! That is the important thing...
Baj