Bert&Jie Lin

Thanks, everybody! Once last question: for the W7, I must have a copy of my wife's passport notarized. I will be with her shortly in China. I would like to have it done there. I've heard that the IRS will and will not accept a copy notarized by the embassy. Anybody have the hard facts?

There's a lot of great information here on the subject and I want to make sure that I understand everything correctly.

My then fiancee came over on a fiancee visa in July, 2009. We were married nearly 3 months later. A little over a month after we were married, she had to make an emergency return to her home country. She is still there and won't likely return anytime soon as I will be joining her there. She has no income for 2009.

It appears that we can file jointly, but we must submit a letter signed by both of us saying that we wish her to be treated as a resident for tax purposes. We will have to apply for an ITIN (never got a SSN as part of the fiancee visa). Does that sound correct? I'm using TurboTax. It asks about residency for a full or partial year. Should I say it was for a full year or a partial year? I know the answer seems obvious, but I am never sure with the IRS.

TIA

In hindsight, I wish my then fiancee would have gotten her SSN right away. It wasn't required to marry, so she didn't get it. You never know what life is going to throw at you. She ended up returning to her country for medical reason before the AOS was completed. Now I have to go through the hassle of getting an ITIN in order to file taxes jointly. My advice is to get the SSN right away.

I bought clear plastic photo albums from Walmart for $1. Each will hold about 40 4x6 photos. This should be easy to slide through the slot in the window. I just want her to take one or two, but my fiancee wants to take the whole 250+ collection with her.

Funny stuff. Hope Obama doesn't hurt himself.

Whether he has helped or hurt the Republican party is irrelevant. He has helped the country by speaking out. I give our president credit for reversing his policies. Cheney paid no small part in that reversal, and America is safer for it.

He could always bring her over again, then at the end of 90 days, send her packing, telling her he found a younger, prettier, sexier woman to marry. That might be an important lesson for her.

Hey everyone:) Just a quick question. In the trip I'm planning to the Philippines, me and my fiancee at that time, are planning on "Hooking up", if you know what I mbean. Unfortunitly, one of our concerns is her getting pregnant. As this is a risk when we adults play around What can we expect should this happen? Can it actually speed up the process of fiancee visa? Can it slow the process? Thanks for all your advice and imput

DON"T get her buntis! Some stupid people do and end up with a mess. It may slow things down as the airlines won't let pregnant ladys fly after 7 months. Also bad for kids to fly until they are over 1 month. Also you may have to go thru the cost and hassel of doing a CRBA.

I have heard of one case in China where a couple was placed before others so the mother could receive medical services and have the child in the US, but I wouldn't count on that happening again. Failure to plan on your part doesn't necessary constitute an emergency on the part of the consulate. If you get lucky, someone might take up your case. I wouldn't risk it.

So, how do the Chinese national men react when they see foreign men in their country with their women?

I have never had anyone say anything to me or otherwise indicate there was an issue, but my experience is in Shanghai. Her parents aren't thrill that she is marrying a foreign devil, but that is another issue. There is an abundance of available women in Shanghai. Many women from other parts of China come to Shanghai. If a Chinese man wants to find a women, he need only to go to Shanghai, but there is one hitch; the women in Shanghai rule quite literally. Also, the gender bias is much less there and is likely the same in other major cities.

There Will Be Blood tops my list. I had to watch it 3 times. I thought the movie would never end.

Ah, ok. IMO, no matter how different of a culture a foreign spouse comes from, they'll become more and more americanized as they are more acclimated to our culture and our customs. It's inevitable.

That reminds me of when I went to Japan. We had a Japanese host from the US that took care of us after work. One night at the restaurant, he starts pounding the table and starts repeating, "Asia is a man's world!". I thought he was drinking iced water, but he was getting hammered with sake over ice. The problem was his wife. He had come back to Japan a year or so earlier and picked out a wife and took her back to the US. Turns out she was adapting the American ways and was starting to express her opinions and telling him what to do.

Women with polarised personalities are capable of extreme love and devotion, as well as occasional rage. The trick is finding one that has a reasonable balance. This is a part of the chinese character that in USA would be regarded as problematic. Consider me acculturated.

I love how you describe these things in the manner of someone shopping for fresh produce.

Ah...the complexities of a Chinese woman...something to be savored liked a fine wine...something few men outside of China will ever experience. There's nothing wrong in knowing what you appreciate about a woman. It only takes a small sip to know the bottle is good. It is better that walking around clueless about what attracts one to a woman. I certainly appreciate the "extreme love and devotion, as well as occasional rage". It makes life interesting, and, for sure, one lives an interesting life with a Chinese woman. She wasn't on my shopping list, but rather we found each other.

A once a dated a woman from China and I would never ever get it in my mind that that experience makes me understand all Chinese women. Some of you guys are hee-larious with your delusions of grandeur.

I don't understand the one I have, much less all.

Women with polarised personalities are capable of extreme love and devotion, as well as occasional rage. The trick is finding one that has a reasonable balance. This is a part of the chinese character that in USA would be regarded as problematic. Consider me acculturated.

I love how you describe these things in the manner of someone shopping for fresh produce.

Ah...the complexities of a Chinese woman...something to be savored liked a fine wine...something few men outside of China will ever experience. There's nothing wrong in knowing what you appreciate about a woman. It only takes a small sip to know the bottle is good. It is better that walking around clueless about what attracts one to a woman. I certainly appreciate the "extreme love and devotion, as well as occasional rage". It makes life interesting, and, for sure, one lives an interesting life with a Chinese woman. She wasn't on my shopping list, but rather we found each other.

Why shouldn't we all stand like pigs at a trough slurping up the government handouts? It's free money right? Well, somebody's got to pay for it, and we will all pay much more than face value. I know; you won't have to pay for it. Someone else will. Our president says he will just squeeze more out of the rich. Does anyone really believe that? It reminds me of Stalin's attack on the "rich". Hoards of neighbors would go out into the night would go out and raid the property of the "rich". It wasn't long before any family with a cow was classed as rich. Stalin finally succeeded when it got to the point when while one group of neighbors was out raiding the property of the "rich", their property was being raided by another group. I heard a senator discussing on a news program one day (seems like it was Bird) that gave his definition of rich. It was anyone that could survive more than a couple of weeks without government benefits after losing a job. We are nearly at the point where half the people don't pay taxes, creating a permanent voting class that relishes in living off other people's money. I am not proud to say that we are now more communist than China.

We will pay for it, either through higher taxes or hyper inflation or a bad economy. Some believe it is better to be equally poor than to have disparities. We may test that theory.

Maybe it doesn't matter in the end; SC will go to hell in a hand basket with the rest of the nation. If we had more politicians stand up for what is right rather that what lined their pocket, we could actually solve the problems of the nation. I salute our fine governor.

True...until the money runs out or the guy finds a younger, hotter model. But I guess they deserve each other and it's their problem to sort. I just think it's a bit sad to be so superficial and materialistic. I was actually reading an article recently about the effects of the economy on Trophy Wives. One guy mentioned he had asked his trophy wife before if she'd still be with him if he didn't have any money. She said, "**, no!" He thought it was funny at the time. Then later, when he lost his job she found another sugardaddy within months and he was heartbroken. That's the downside to being shallow. But again, not my problem so as long as everyone's an adult, to each their own.

It is also sad to people automatically assume a young lady married to an older guy is a gold digger. A woman can love a rich/poor man as well as she can love a(n) younger/older man. It's ok for a good looking young couple marry, but when there is an age difference, somehow it becomes a problem. Jealousy maybe?

I had never heard of it until yesterday. I called my fiancee. She asked me date. She then asked, "Doesn't that mean something to you?" It was too soon for any anniversary. I couldn't think of anything, which is usually bad news for a guy. She told me it was International Woman's Day, like she expected me to know. She was disappointed when I told her I had never heard of it. Apparently, it is a big deal in China.

I couldn't imagine marrying an American woman with such an age difference. We just wouldn't have anything in common. I also couldn't imagine waking up beside an old woman every morning the same age as me. Having a younger woman helps keep me young. I might even live a little longer. I would like to see the statistics on that. We also have similar interest without all the hangups. I think a lot of Western women have an issue with age difference. It used to be the norm. Too bad times have changed. I see too many young people marrying right out of high school or college. They have a child and two years later they are divorced. The guy is still in party mode while the woman wants to settle down. Stability is not a bad thing. The way I look at it, we both benefit. I will have a beautiful young wife whose primary goal to take care of me and our family. When I am gone, she will be able to start the next stage of her life a little better off and will be able to take care of her parents as they get old.

I suspect many of these extreme age marriages fail but for those who come to it for the right reasons, they can and do last as some of us have seen.

It may be counter-intuitive, but I would speculate just the opposite. The marriage has less time to fail; therefore, the probability should be less.

My parents passed away many years ago, but my sisters have been supportive. However, my fiancee's parents aren't taking it so well. They are very conservative and traditional. They wanted her to marry someone from the same region. They tried to pressure her by inviting her not to come back home, so we he had to get another apartment. I don't think that is what they wanted or expected to happen, but they forced my fiancee to make a decision. If she went home, she would "never" be allowed out the house again, even to work. I am sure they would not have done that, but they were trying their best to split us. It backfired. I haven't met her parents because her father wanted to beat me. With the passage of time, her parents now accept that we will get married. They both agree now, but her father still isn't happy. Her father no longer wants to beat me, so that's progress. She's now spending time with her parents. With time, I think they will happy when they see that she is happy.

One more problem is that I have no phone records (we were communicating over the skype). And I have no letters (c'mon, it's 21st century now! it takes 1 month for regular letter to reach recipient! we use email). But we do have tons of emails.

Skype, at least the version I have, records the history of conversions, including the date, time, and duration of the call. Just select the contact and then "Show Messages from:" "From Beginning". I cut and pasted and put into an Excel Spreadsheet.