B&Gie

Hmmm. I just got a pin and called the embassy. They received our case May 20, but 19 days later they are still checking the papers so we are not eligible to schedule an interview yet. Oh well, guess I'll have to be patient. Thanks for the info. I guess we can get the medical done at least. Looks like that department of state number doesn't know if your papers have arrived at the embassy, only (I assume) if they have arrived and been fully processed.

I've been searching the archives to figure out the process in Manila and how to avoid delays, and I'd appreciate if someone could verify what I think I've learned. My NOA2 was may 13 and NVC (603-334-0700) sent the docs to Manila May 18 and gave me my case number. However, the Department of State(202-663-1225) says the docs have not arrived in Manila yet. My finance and I are already collecting all the necessary paperwork, but I'm looking to avoid delays on the medical an interview.

The medical can be done at any time, no appointment needed as long as you have a MNL case number from the NVC right?

I can schedule the interview as soon as our case papers arrive the embassy and are processed right?. Do they send any electronic notification of this or is it just the the papers sent to the beneficiary? Is it just a link to http://manila.usembassy.gov/wwwfk1en.pdf or is there more to it?

The earliest interview date they will normally give is about a month after I call right? But if the medical is done and I call again they might make it sooner?

If anyone can answer/confirm/deny any of that I'd appreciate it. I know I should probably just be patient, but, well, I'm not doing so good with that Thanks.

Definitely I learned mahal kita first. Seems like every time there was cute girl in the area, her friends all tried to teach me to say mahal kita. The other things I picked up early were salamat and gwapo

I hear you on the tourist part. My favorite place in Thailand is Chiang Mai, and it is where I bought a couple of Town Houses (through my wife, of course!) and plan on retiring. The number of tourists, especially the Eurotrash, can be a pain in the A$$! I have spent a lot of time in the Philippines, and traveled extensively there as well. The deciding factor for me between PI and Thailand is religion. I am not a Christian, and I have very strong view concerning Catholicism, which as you know, is so dominant in the Philippines. I prefer the Buddhist way of life, and the easy going lifestyle of the Thai people.

Good luck to both of us!

Man do I hear you on the Christianity thing! It was funny when I told people in the PI that I was atheist and often they would ask "But you still believe in God right?" I'm about as atheist as they come, so the idea of marrying a practicing Catholic had just never occurred to me...and it took some getting used to. However, most of my family are practicing catholics, occasional catholics, or former catholics, so I tolerate it fairly well. I'm also fortunate that my finacee, while steeped in that culture, is really more spiritual than by the book catholic. She's also had some major disappointments with the church recently, as well as some exposure to crazy heathen foreigners...who have treated her better than her own people and posed some enlightening questions and ideas about the church. I just hope her family doesn't realize I'm leading her down the path to eternal damnation. Actually they seem fairly tolerant. Chiang Mai was a nice place....and almost free of Eurotrash compared to the south. If only we could mix and match the best features of 2 or 3 countries. Heck I'd just be happy with a decent job in someplace I'd actually like to live.

Ouch, what a mess. From reading your account I get a confrontational, controlling, paranoid vibe. I'm not saying you necessarily are like that, but that's the impression I get from reading your story. Now that may just be you writing style, and after what's happened you clearly do have some reason to be angry and suspicious.

The wife sounds like (1) a gold digging green card scammer or (2) a dumb slu.....person of limited intelligence and unrestrained relations, who genuinely doesn't realize that seeing her boyfriend(s) and funding them with your money is going to cause problems. I suppose it could also be (3) a decent girl who was driven away by an angry paranoid husband. I haven't the foggiest idea which it really is, though I'm lean toward 1 or 2.

Like on of the earlier posters said, taking her passport was a HUGE mistake, and you might loose just based on that. I'll elaborate a bit on the why of that. I totally understand why you did it, it's not that unreasonable, and it doesn't make you a bad person. However, in the eyes of the law it is a very serious transgression and puts you in company with some very nasty criminals. Pimps take the IDs of their hos. Brothels/dodgey massage shops take the IDs of their illegal workers. Drug dealers and loan sharks take the IDs of people who owe them money. Factory owners who use debt-bonded(slave) workers take their IDs to keep them from escaping. You took her passport to stop her from leaving. Withholding someone's ID, especially a female immigrant, is associated with the worst kinds of human trafficking. The laws are written for that and unfortunately it sounds like you violated those laws. I know you're not like them and didn't have bad intentions when you did it, but boy her lawyer will have a field day with that one. Since you DID violate those laws the burden of proof is probably going to be on you to show that it was not malicious and hope they are feeling nice. Google is failing to give me the pertinent laws but if she presses charges I'm pretty sure there's a chance you could do some serious jail time. In some ways if might be better if you had smacked her around. Assault is only a misdemeanor, while the passport thing gets into shades of bondage/trafficking in persons so it might well be a felony. I'd say you need a good lawyer ASAP. Hopefully you won't get burned too bad by any of this, but if this was chess you just lost your queen a few turns into the game...you might still win but you're gonna have to be careful and play a heck of a game.

It just seemed you were really judging the OP and to an extent, Thailand. I have been both places as well, and had both Pinay and Thai girlfriends, and I must say, I'm much happier with Thailand and my Thai wife. Not everyone is the same, and not everyone met their SO in the same manner, or for the same length of time, yet many relationships work out, if they are meant to be. It's always better, IMHO, to be more supportive, rather than negative.

Well I can certainly see why you thought I was a bit too strident and critical in my original warning, but on the chance that the OP really was clueless I wanted to be quite clear and emphatic. Thailand is just not a good/safe place for those who are particularly naive, impulsive, or lacking in common sense. It's like alcohol, cars, and teenagers. None of them are bad in and of themselves, but put them together and the likelihood of idiocy and disaster goes way up. Man now I sound like someone's grandfather. "You kids ought to stop drinking and partying and carrying on or you'll come to no good end I tell ya!"

I certainly didn't mean to disparage Thailand. It has its problems, but so does every country. I'd much rather live in Thailand than here in New England. Darn frozen wasteland it is here. I do prefer the Philippines by a small margin. The deciding factors for me are lack of tourists, and tons of great shore diving/snorkeling . I just wish I could have visited Thailand 20 or 30 years ago before it got popular. That must have really been incredible. As it is I'm going to have to teach my Pinay how to cook Thai food. Ironic that, but what can you do? Now if only I could have found a half Thai half Indian girl, then I'd be all set.

He was NOT scammed; he is merely experiencing "buyers remorse".

Was he scammed? I'm not 100% sure since I don't have a recording of the whole incident, but I would bet he was. It sure sounds like the guy told him it was 1800 Bhat. If the guy told him 1800 USD and he said OK then no it wasn't a scam it was just him being stupid. If that's the case then he now how has buyers remorse and he should just suck it up and accept his losses. However it sounds to me like the guy was being deceptive on the price. When the taxi driver doesn't turn the meter on and then tries to charge you $500 for a $5 ride, do you pay it? After all you got into the taxi knowing you were going to have to pay for the ride right? Of course you don't pay it. You hand him a reasonable ammount and when he asks for more you tell him to get stuffed. Of course you should alwaysbe 100% clear on price first, but if you don't and the guy charges you several orders of magnitude more than the going rate, that's fraud. If you go to the cops they will tell him to get stuffed or even arrest him. Some cities have taxi fraud units with undercover cops posing as"foreigners" at the airports to catch these guys just like they do sting operations with fake undercover hookers and drug dealers. The visa scam agency is the same thing. Sure he is a dumbass for trusting that guy. Sure he is a dumass for not being 100% sure what the price is and exactly what services are to be rendered. I would even say he is a dumbass for giving his credit card to a Thai national he just met on the street....always pay cash. I'm not sure that the Thai tourist police would back him up, but by the American standards of the credit card company, IF they told him it was 1800 Bhat then it is clearly fraud.

B&Gie... would it have been better if he went to the PI to be scammed? I mean after all... there are absolutely NO scams in the Philippines, right?!

Yes it's alway better to be scammed in the Philippines.

Look, I'm not bashing Thailand. For the most part I love Thailand. My bigest problem with Thailand is that I have to share it with so many darn farrang. However, one of the (few) things I don't like about Thailand is that everyone and his brother is trying to scam you, at least in Bangkok. Even some of the farrang are trying to scam you. Actually it dosn't bother me much because I'm reasonably informed and suspicious and it's a lot less of an issue outside the capitol. Listening to all the slick scam artists trying to talk you out of your money can actually be kinda fun. It is almost as much a part of the BKK experience as tuktuk rides and playing spot the ladyboy. I think someone earlier said BKK is the scam capitol of the world, and I have to agree. I hadn't been out of my room more than 15 minutes before I had the first scammer approach for the clasic free tuktuk tour...of suit factories, jewelery shops, etc, etc.. By contrast I saw very few street level scam artists in the Philippines. Online dating scams yes....internet cafes could be...ammusing, but street level con artists, not so much. I'd guess that's mostly because of the relative lack of tourists. There's just not enough rich suckers walking around to support many scam artist in the Philippines. I'd bet there's a lot more scammers in BKK than there are tourists in all of the Philippines. Of course in the Philippines I'd say you're a lot more likely to get pick-pocketed, robbed at knife/gunpoint , or kidnapped, so don't think I'm playing favorites. And you're way more likely to be blown up by dynamite fishermen in the Philippines. That was an... interesting... experience.

How did you decide to marry a Pinay? Are you some expert on Asia? What kind of questions are you asking?

I don't claim to be an expert on asia. I spent about 15 months traveling south east asia and I saw a few things and drew a few conclusions. I'm marrying a Pinay because one of her coworkers introduced us, she was quiting her sales job which she hated, she was willing to travel with me, and she had a hot @$$. After several months of traveling together and even more months of corresponding I came to the (somewhat grudging) conclusion that she really was a smart, hardworking, humble, fun, cheerful, and a tremendously good caring warm hearted person who is genuinely head over heels in love with me. I didn't really feel ready to be married yet, but I've never been this happy with anyone else, so I'm going with it. That's why I'm marrying a Pinay. I still half think its crazy, and it sure is a pain in the rear marrying a foreigner, but at least I'm satisfied that I've done my due diligence. Maybe I've been scammed...but if I have, I'll take her to Hollywood and with acting skills like that she's sure to be a star.

Your visions are wrong, and you need to save them for yourself. Are you somehow better?

Anyway, like I said I don't know the guy's history. I'm not claiming to have any prophetic visions of the future, or be better than anyone. Maybe it will all work out great...I certainly hope it will. However this story just makes me cringe. It would make me cringe if it was on thorntree and he was just on vacation, but it really makes me cringe knowing that he's there to get married. There's the potential for a bigger mistake, and he has already shows that he might have poor judgement or be uninformed. Maybe he just had a bad day. Maybe his honey just needs to give him some pointers on street smarts in Thailand. But for me it's a warning flag that maybe he ought to just double check that he's done his due diligence and really knows what he's getting into. I don't know whether he just picked her picture a few weeks ago on HotThaiBrides4NaiveDorks.com or whether he's an expat who speaks fluent Thai and they have been living together for years. Probably it's somewhere between those extremes, but I don't know so I'm not qualified to judge. However, I'd rather give him a reality check he doesn't need than not give him one that could potentially stop him from walking blindly into a lot of trouble. he can always ignore me. I don't mean to say anything bad about Thailand or his fiancee or even him. I'm just asking whether he has really sat down and thought about it and informed himself like he should have. I'm not claiming he hasn't. I don't really want to know whether he has, or hasn't. I'm just saying that if he hasn't then he might want to 'cause it could potentially save him a lot of trouble down the road. I don't know how naive he is so it's better to warn him just in case. If his encounter with the visa agency scam is any indication it's not unreasonable to think that some introspection and education might help make life easier for him and his fiancee.

I'm surprised no one else has brought this up. The fact that you were scammed so easily and so seriously, and even worse that you came here to ask if you really were scammed makes me very, very concerned about your plan to marry a Thai girl. Now I haven't spent a whole lot of time in Thailand but I knew before I even arrived there to be darn careful of both the girls and the scam artists. Thailand is an amazing place and most Thais are lovely people, but you really need to be on your toes there. You need to be street smart and always a bit suspicious. It sounds to me like you may have jumped in way over your head. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe there is more history here than I know, but darn is that a BIG warning flag. How do you decide to marry a Thai girl while still being such a naive Thailand newbie that you fall for a scam like this....and not even be sure in hindsight that it was a scam. I truly don't intend to be mean or disrespectful, but if you were one of my friends or family members I would be VERY concerned for you right now. I'm having visions of train wrecks. Anyway that's what I'm thinking. Take it or leave it as you see fit.

About your money: Yes you were scammed. You agreed to the service but the description of the service and the price were fraudulent. 1800 Bhat (what he told you the price was) for a Thai guy to help you with papers for 2 hours is good money there, but reasonable. $1800 USD for the same thing is fraud. That's over half a year's pay there. If it was like $15000 here in the US would you fight it? Even a immigration attorney in the US wouldn't charge $1800 for just some help with the initial forms. Granted they wouldn't do a whole lot more in most cases, but they would at least handle a lot of the interaction with the government so it at least looked like they were really working on it even if it was mostly just forwarding documents around. Just because you were scammed by a business doesn't mean it wasn't a scam or that it wasn't fraud. It just means it'll be harder to see justice done. Call your credit card and fight it. It might not work but you are in the right and it is worth at least trying. Tell them you're happy to pay the 1800 bhat which is what they guy told you and what is a reasonable, even generous payment for the service rendered.

I gotta thank all those who said "Not us" to all the tantrums, threats, and running away stuff. It would be really worrying if that was the norm. If that happens with my fiancee and I that would be a deal breaker. To me that means that, as much as I love her, either she isn't ready for marriage or we're not right for each other. We've been through a lot together, and I think she's too mature for all that. I've seen some of the minor cultural stuff in our 4 months together, but I can't even imagine some of the more severe stuff. I sure hope I'm not wrong.

...any decision to abort is an incredibly emotionally complex one and relate to real lives, with real people making real decisions for incredibly individual reasons.

incredibly emotionally complex. That's the phrase I wanted and couldn't think of.

Definitely, a for Olivia.

"when the the study doesn't actually show that. "

Can we get that in flashy, bright neon?

I looked but I can't find a neon sign font

Far2Long: That's a very melancholy and insightful story.

Haha, I've actually been dragged up on stage with a live band to sing the refrain of Nosi Balasi. When I was still in the RP I had the numbers of House of the Rising Sun and Hotel California memorized for when it was my turn at the mic. Actually singing tagalog songs was kinda fun too, though I could only even attempt very slow ones. gave everyone a good laugh. She still laughs at my pronunciation every time I try to say something new in Visaya. I'm sure we'll have to get some sort of videoke when she get here. She loves it and has a wonderful voice I could listen to all day.

yea, I'm not saying that abortion is great(it's a miserable experience), or that it never contributes to mental health disorders(I'm sure it does in some cases). However, it burns me to see fearmongers distort and misrepresent a legitimate scientific study to give the impression that having an abortion is likely to cause mental health problems, when the the study doesn't actually show that.

Hehe this is like the telephone game where it gets distorted with every telling. Next step will be that abortion causes schizophrenia.

The study found a relationship between abortion and mental health disorders. No surprise there. I'm sure there's a strong association between dysfunctional relationships, unwanted pregnancy, and mental health disorders. That's blindingly obvious.

There is nothing in that article to say that the scientific study conducted in the UK pointed to a causal relationship. That press release came from The Family Research Council, which is a US based Christian fundamentalist think tank. Certainly they think the relationship is causal, and they are trying hard to make it look like the evidence fits their beliefs. However, if you read the article carefully you'll find that the relationship part comes from the study and the alleged causality comes from the church people. The part talking about the British study says nothing about causality. Very sneaky.

Now I'm not saying that abortion is for everyone. If you are strongly fundamentalist and really believe that abortion is a mortal sin which will see you burning in hell for eternity, then I wouldn't recommend it to you. Yea, it might even cause some mental health disorders if you had one. But don't try to convince the rest of us who don't share your beliefs that having an abortion will somehow make us nuts.

There is also a pretty strong connection between having kids too young and low quality of life. Likewise between preventing access to abortions and women dying in botched back alley abortions. Granted I can't quote a study off the top of my head to back those up but I'm sure there are some there if anyone cares to look. Anyway i just hate to see research misused and distorted.

OK I asked an OBGYN about how they can tell if someone has had an abortion or miscarriage.

If a pelvic exam is done, a doctor will know that some type of procedure was done, as her cervix will look differently, and not like the way a cervix would look if you have never given birth or never had a procedure done. So if a doctor sees the cervix, he/she will know that some type of procedure was done by the way the cervix looks.

So an external exam won't tell anything but an internal exam will tell she had an abortion or miscarriage due to the shape of the cervix? About how many weeks does the pregnancy have to go to make a noticeable change?

This is correct- if she has a pelvic exam and the cervix is looked at, they will notice that something was done. Cervical changes happen at the beginning of pregnancy.

So then the question is whether they just do an external exam only or whether they do a full internal pelvic exam. I seem to remember reading on another post that it is external only. Can anyone confirm that?

Actually I just noticed that jom and vsmtghdy replied while I was typing this. Jom seems to indicate that the exam is external only and a never pregnant answer is pretty safe especially for the OP.

vsmtghdy: My fiance's abortion was closer to 4 months, and it will be probably 8 or 9 months between the abortion and the medical exam. The OP was 2 months and unknown time between. What's your opinion on those situations? If they don't do an internal exam the changes to the cervix and uterus should be undetectable I'd think. I know the breasts get larger but was unaware of any other visible changes. Can a doctor who has never seen them before the pregnancy tell the difference with any degree of reliability?

For that matter a good beating by a gang of thugs might also do the trick

That sound like a good idea of starting of new business in RP.....giving a little extra encouragement..LOL

Actually it's a very old business called extortion. Gangs have been doing it for hundreds of years, and before them warlords and kings were doinig it for thousands of years and calling it tribute. It's a tried and true method of extracting wealth from anyone who is tied to a business/property and don't have as tough a gang of friends as you do. It's a bit risky but it works. Of course normally there isn't any legitimate claim to the cash, but that's the only reason I was willing to suggest it now, because it's justified.

Panel Physician will not be able to determine if she had abortion, they can however determine if an individual had been pregnant.

How the heck do they tell if she has EVER been pregnant?????? Especially if it was a really early termination. How reliable is this and how long does the pregnancy have to go to leave permanent signs? Any doctors here?

So it sounds from those of you who have actually finished this step in the process that there are two questions. Have you been pregnant? Have you had an abortion and/or miscarriage? And it sounds like that last one comes as one question which can be answered with simply a yes/no. That implies that you never have to tell the doctor whether it was an abortion or a miscarriage. It also implies that a miscarriage would cause mandatory psyche screening. Am i getting this right?

Has anyone here actually gone through this psyche process for a miscarriage or abortion? I'd LOVE to hear from anyone who's actually done it, though I'm happy with any scrap of reliable info anyone can come up with.

To the OP: I'm guessing that an early drug based abortion is pretty undetectable. How long between the abortion and the medical? I'm guessing that "I don't know" might even be a plausible answer. Having an early miscarriage could be pretty similar to simply missing a period and the lady in question might not even be sure whether she was pregnant or not if she didn't do a test. At least that could be plausible deniability if she says she was never pregnant and they somehow (unlikely) can tell that she was.

Exterminate a baby, then back it up with a lie. Good start to a meaningful relationship.

Good point. That's a shaky basis for a relationship. I've always thought a shared self-righteous and intolerance are a much firmer foundation for a relationship and life in general.

Where adultery is illegal?

In the US or RP?

Because if that is the case half the country will be in jail...already especially the US side..LOL

My understanding is that it is illegal in the RP and carries a not insignificant jail term. The laws and punishments there are hard core. Of course just because there are laws on the books doesn't mean the cops are in the habit of enforcing them. Prostitution and bribery are illegal too and we know how well that's enforced. However, with some connections or maybe a little of that (illegal) bribery to encourage the right people to just do their jobs, that enforcement is possible. There is at least one documented case of it.

Oh, and one or two other thoughts on leverage. Contacting(or saying you will) his family, friends, or coworkers back in the US and giving them the story might put some social pressure on him. Newspaper adds in a small (free?) local paper might work if he is from a small community. These ideas could be totally useless or perfect for you, depends on the guy.

I seem to remember reading a thread on this a while back. If neither she or the child are US citizens then the US government could care less and will not get involved. If he is in RP then the RP government can garnish his earnings and even have him jailed for non payment. Of course getting that to actually happen is easier said than done. If he leaves the country then no one can enforce it. Sorry to be a downer, though your chances are better than that thread where he was in the US and the child was out of wedlock.

If they're never married or divorced then good luck. If they're still married then maybe there are some other options. Now I'm not recommending any of these options but if he's as big a looser as he sounds then they might work for you. I seem to remember a story about a USC being blackmailed and jailed for adultery, which is a crime there. His girlfriend was getting an annulment but the ex wanted a large cash payoff or he would bring up adultery charges. The USC didn't pay and went to jail. He hardly deserved it, but it sounds like this guy might. And if he's in jail then he can't change his bank account Even short stint in jail might scare him into playing straight. For that matter a good beating by a gang of thugs might also do the trick, especially if the support is reasonable and he has local ties. You might also want to look into inheritance. This guy might be worth more dead than alive. Might be a better person that way too. Just a thought. Sorry if these suggestions are to non-conformist for you, but it sounds like this guy needs a little extra encouragement to behave like a decent human being.

I asked somewhat the same question about a month ago. I'll summarize what I've been able to find out.

They may be able to tell if she has had an abortion/miscarriage from the exam. I'm not sure if they can always tell but they can at least some of the time. It also depends on the doctor. Some don't even check, while others are religious zealots who feel it is their duty to find and punish the wicked. They can't tell if it is a miscarriage or an abortion. However any pregnant woman in the Philippines who looses a pregnancy is supposed to report it and get a certificate of fetal death. I have trouble imagining enforcement is strict especially if the abortion is early like in your case, but that is technically the law. Abortion is illegal there. However I don't think think they are generally in the habit of prosecuting, and I don't know that you can do jail time for it or have it go on your criminal record.

Many(most?) women don't admit to their abortion in the interview. If you get caught in that lie then you're finished, but if you're a half decent liar the chances of getting caught are slim. Some women have admitted it and ultimately been denied. They get labeled as mentally unstable and are permanently blacklisted. Other women have admitted it and had no trouble. If you admit to an abortion that is a red flag and requires mandatory psychiatric screening. the doctor can't deny you. It's the psychiatrist who makes that decision. The abortion by itself SHOULD NOT be grounds for rejection. If it is fairly justifiable abortion and you are mentally healthy then you SHOULD be OK. An abortion by a well educated girl at 20something with a steady boyfriend who had an accident can just tell the truth and she should be OK. On the other hand, an Angles city hooker who has had 2 or 3 abortions by age 20 had better be one heck of a good liar, cause that's her only chance. If you're somewhere in the middle, well then who knows?

So basically it's a really thorny problem. How "respectable" is your girl? How much do you trust your random doctor and shrink to be fair and liberal like they are technically supposed to be? Do you trust your government when it tells you to trust said doctors/shrinks? Do you trust your luck that day? Is your girl a good liar? Is she cool under interrogation? There is no good completely safe answer. You could be fine or get burned either way.

USCIS doesn't hate you because you're black. They hate you because you're racist and you don't understand the difference between a reason for suspicion and a reason for denial.

I am still wondering though, why filipinas? I am from Phil's neighbour country and I would say that some Southeast Asian countries' ladies are not that much different with Filipina's in terms of holding family orientation value. Let's say.. Thai, Indonesian, or Malaysian. I have had this question a long ago too, it's not answered yet

Good question. There are a ton of reasons but it all comes down to history, and how it has affected the culture, religion, and language in the Philippines. 300 years of Spanish rule and 100 years of American rule/influence has left the Philippines very westernized. They are Catholic, they speak English, and it's one of the few places where they actually LIKE Ammerica.(because we helped them kick out the Japanese who were brutal bastards in WW2)

The religion thing is huge. Two reasons here. First a LOT of ultra conservative christian guys head to the Philippines because there are a heck of a lot more conservative christian girls there than in the US and they're way easier to find. Even for non Christians this is a plus. For example I'm an atheist so I really would prefer another atheist. However part of my family is catholic, so I'm more comfortable marrying a catholic than say a Buddhist or especially a Muslim. Not that that would be a big issue for me personally, but it would for a lot of people. Haha, Grandma would flip if I brought home a Muslim wife. You have to remember that like 70 to 80% of the US is Christian of some sort, which makes Indonesia and Malaysia very low on the list of places Americans are going to look for a wife. My guess is over half the guys in America would refuse to marry a Muslim. No way no how. Buddhist is less of a problem. Only the conservative Christians(I'd guess 25%) would refuse to marry a Buddhist.

The other huge thing is the language. Most Pinays speak decent English, many of them very good english. They study it every year of school so your average 16 year old girl there has like 10 years of lessons and speaks English much better than her counterparts anywhere else in Asia , well except Singapore.

The culture thing is interesting too. The culture is much more similar to the US culture, so there is a lot less culture shock. The Philippines is also a much more international culture. They export workers and wives. Everyone there knows someone who works overseas or got married to a foreigner. That's where the money comes from. The foreign worker especially is officially considered to be a cultural hero. That's how you make it there....by getting out. Just remember to send back cash for those you left behind. I bet over 95% of the young women with even occasional internet access have a filipinaheart account. Heck, I've seen 10 year old girls chatting in the internet cafes with foreign guys just to practice and pass the time. The guys drink Tanduay rum, and the girls look for foreign boyfriends. Those are the national pastimes.

The other cultural thing is how warm the people are. I'm not saying anything bad about the rest of SE Asia...the cultural and language barriers make it a totally unfair comparison, but I've never been anywhere where the people are half as friendly as in the Philippines. The friendliness just immediately shines out of them. I've had a guy try to hand me a shot of rum through the window of a bus for the 2 seconds it stopped at a stop sign. That's the kind of friendliness I'm talking about, and it's the norm. Also there are hardly any foreigners there compared mainland SE Asia.

To answer the OP, i wasn't looking for a Filipina wife, and it took me a while to get used to the idea. I spent about half a year in the Philippines on vacation. As a young fairly good looking white guy, the girls were practically lining up to meet me even when I was just walking down the street. It was actually kind of freaky, like hay did I turn into Brad Pit overnight or something? It was like dong at least a years worth of dating each month. Anyway, that makes it really hard not to end up with a great girlfriend. My girl is one of the warmest, most kind-hearted, most cheerful people I have ever met. She is smart, hard working, and not materialistic or shallow. It's kind of funny to say but one of the things I love about her is that she is content with so little. As long as she has food, shelter, good health, and a loving relationship she is happy. She appreciates those simple, important things and just radiates happiness. That's an attitude that's hard to find here in the US. It's how I try to be myself, but to be honest she's a good deal better at it than I am. We're not perfect for each other in every way. However I could spend years in the bar scene and not find a better match, and I can't imagine there's another girl on the planet who could ever be more in love with me. Besides, I love the Philippines almost as much as I love my Filipina. If only there were jobs there.

yea like M&C said. Just find her a big old coat for the drive home, and then take her shopping ASAP.....in the kids department