LostinTranslation

Hi Idocare,
I am sorry to hear of your misfortune with your Nigerian lover/husband/scammer. I too feel as if I was a victim but in a different way. There was a post similar to my story can’t remember who the poster was. He didn’t need a green card; he was a fortunate winner of the DV Lottery. Here is my story regarding my first and last encounter with a Nigerian man. I met this young man through a mutual friend. I found him to be intriguing, intelligent and first and foremost his fear of God and love for God. Well, he became my main focus and I became his (I thought). After many flights back and forth between the two of us, we decided to cohabitate. Because we were in love, this is when I got LOST IN TRANSLATION. I started assisting him with applications for jobs, passing his resume to girlfriends that are recruiters’ , taking time off to take him to interviews, open house, paying for his medicals expenses, medication and by the Grace of God he became employed. I started going to work late, leaving early so that he would have a way to and from work. Then he became very distance, too tired for sex (not such a big issue, he was lousy in bed), always on the cell phone. I noticed that he was using an 800 number immediately after I left for work (before he became employed). I have Comcast digital voice which records all incoming and outgoing calls. I called the number and it was for VIP Communication. Asked around and it is used to call international. I became suspicious and I installed the software that another poster used. WOW! Found he too is married. All along he was assuring that he wanted to marry me. So you can imagine my hurt when I found out he was already married. He was using me to get a job and to save to get his wife and three children here. I could not believe what I read. I was so into this man, I was trying so hard to make this work. I started learning Yoruba and cooking African dishes to please this man. I started snooping, found birth certificate with the woman name as the mother with his last name. I emailed her and told her the entire story; she simply clicked forward and sent the email to him. I simply deleted the email out of his account (I have access to his email account). That didn’t make a difference because on his daily calls to her, she told him. That’s when I knew it was time to let him know what I knew. He said, that they were not married it’s considered a traditional marriage; don’t know what that mean but I wasn’t falling for it. No more “lost in translation”. I began collecting information I needed to sue him for money invested, receipts, credit card bills, etc. I have his alien number, driver’s license, social security and immigration number. Before I put my Timberlands on and kicked him to the curb, I gave him an invoice of all expenses incurred. He laughed and told me that I was careless, I turned that laugh upside down when I starting calling off all those numbers from memory. To let him know he is more careless than I will ever be. You see, it was a joke and all for own personal gain or should I say selfish gain. I drew up a promissory note for him to sign stating what he owed, when payments should be made each month. The promissory note was in conjunction with the invoice. He stated, that not a court in the US would make him re-pay me for expenses incurred, well for one week he was homeless, he and his luggage were placed on the stairway. Do I regret it, never? He been gone now for one month today and told me yesterday that his time with me was wasted. I laughed because I have something he need and he’s not getting it. Someone on the other post said that the wife may not care as long as she can come to America. Well she didn’t.
My story is different from Idocare but similar. I cared deeply for this man but his motive was to get my friends and myself to help him get a “good” job, so that he could bring his family over. Could never figure out why her name was not on his application or the children for the DV lottery. I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about people doing anything to get a green card but this man has his green card. Yet he is a lying, cheating scoundrel. My daily calls from him are so amusing now. He tells me that I tried to destroy him, what? Guess he said that because I emailed the “misses”. Shouldn’t be cheating. He called me one day, 15 times on my job. The last voicemail was a threat, had to get the police involved although he’s more than 1500 miles from me now, you never know. . The next day after the threat, he called begging me to forgive him that he was annoyed. Now that I don’t answer his call, he leaves a voicemail asking why I won’t talk to him, what’s wrong with me (why something has to be wrong with me)? Not once has the man recognized the pain I am feeling or felt it was all about him. He even stated that I shouldn’t ask him for reimbursement of the expenses because we are friends. No, we were friends is what I told him. Is this man crazy or am I missing something. He also wrote in one of his email to his brother, that “Americans are good if you can handle them”. Guess he couldn’t handle me. Think about that statements lady, “We are good if they can handle us”. You know I am beet red, from even repeating what he wrote. The poster that recommended that software was on the money, I didn’t invoice him for the software that one was on me. I am open for questions, I am sure there will be some from reading all the other information posted on the website. I never went through the process of petitioning for anyone and for what I’ve read and experienced first hand I won’t. I am basically a positive person and I am not trying to discourage you ladies from your journey. Just be careful please. I’ve met a wonderful man from Paris (has dual citizenship) and I don’t have to petition for him. But I will have both eyes open. Limit yourself on what you say regarding your personal life, all personal information place under lock and key. Not to say don’t trust, just be cautious. My so-called friend could quote the Bible and kneel to pray at the drop of a dime but would get on the internet and email his wife, get in the bed with me and try to “sex me up”. I am weary when a man can kneel to pray and then get up and pecker is hard as Japanese arithmetic. Gotta close ladies, I do pray that the men you have chosen are also the men that God has chosen for you. Keep God closer. Please excuse any errors, I am human.