khengool

thought i posted in here already, but my AP ended on october 20th or so and my wife (fiancee) got her visa on the 20th of November, 2008.

POE was in december.

khengool--what is happening with the visa? Anything?

Call the CDC and ask questions.

Trust me.

You will be surprised.

i called the mean asian lady a c*nt.

That might have had something to do with it.

maybe she didn't hear me though. I dunno.

Isn't this how a lot of marriages of convenience end up working out?

This is why meeting the man of your dreams on Yahoo Messenger who will whisk you away to America and help your impoverished family back home is a bad idea.

This is the converse of the case where the little MENA guy who is HALF the petitioner's weight and age treats her like ####### and demands a divorce after POE.

Seriously people, if your story is anything like these, do everyone (yourself included) a favor and abandon/cancel your petition. You're only clogging up the system for everyone else.

helloo guys

iam stuck in AP its going to be three months since my interview i called the DOS many times still in AP and one month ago the embassy in islamabad called me and asked me about my travels just a few question and i call to DOS any time they say did they call u and always my answer is yes they called me then they say its in processing call the embassy and i cant get anyone on the phone here in islamabad its always busy i e mailed them many times

AP started: may 20th, 2008

Security Clearance: November 4th, 2008

Congratulations! Have a safe trip to the U.S.!

Hello,

Thanks for your kind words.

My fiancee's AP seems to be completed, but I will believe when we've got the visa in hand.

We are leaving for Ankara in a week or so.

I hope everyone else is through with theirs ASAP. It is a horrible thing to go through. I wish they would just remove the uncertainty and give people more information on the status of their cases. it would make things easier on everyone and the number of emails the consulate receives would certainly decrease.

good luck to you all.

helloo guys

iam stuck in AP its going to be three months since my interview i called the DOS many times still in AP and one month ago the embassy in islamabad called me and asked me about my travels just a few question and i call to DOS any time they say did they call u and always my answer is yes they called me then they say its in processing call the embassy and i cant get anyone on the phone here in islamabad its always busy i e mailed them many times

AP started: may 20th, 2008

Security Clearance: November 4th, 2008

the doctors in that office are corrupt

• they definitely give kickbacks to the consulate (why else would they be the only doctors in ALLLLLL of Ankara that get to work with the US Embassy?)
• they harass people who have never used recreational/illicit drugs in the hopes of getting them to admit drug use (falsely) and bribe the doctors to sign off on their medical
• they often "accidentally walk in" on young female patients while they are getting dressed (example: more than a few women who had been told to change back into their regular clothes have reported that the medical "professional" came right back without knocking after telling them they were leaving and leaving the door ajar on purpose

Khengool and fiancee: AP since May 20th, 2008

Eff the consulates and eff the DOS. they are all a bunch of tossers and don't deserve the minimum wage they are paid. Their jobs should all be outsourced to India or China or wherever people get mad about having their jobs outsourced to. The best part is that every time I call DOS or USCIS or wherever they are immigrants themselves! You'd think they'd be a little more sensitive!

A few questions:

If the chick loved the guy, but not the American economy, why didn't she just ask him to live in her home country?

Might that have something to do with the guy not knowing anything about the home country aside from his contact with her?

Are his ancestors from that country?

Does he speak her mother tongue?

Does he know her family?

Did he ever live in that country previously?

Did they meet in a chat room, or in person?

Did they get engaged after him visiting her for a week?

Sometimes when I read about people's visa journeys I wonder what these peeps are smokin'.

solid relationships require some things that are overlooked very often:

1. Transparency: if she doesn't tell you what you want to know when you want to know it, then RUN!
2. Trust: if you have the slightest touch of doubt about whether she still likes her ex, then RUN!
3. Communication: If you don't speak one of her languages, and she doesn't speak one of yours, RUN!
4. Rationality: If you can't get a girl that hot in the U.S., you may just be renting the one you're getting overseas, so RUN!
5. Family compatibility: If her family is uncomfortably poor, uneducated, and downtrodden and you're not, then RUN!

Tina! The best part of ur message was the wacko face! Yes I certainly feel sometimes but ONE good thing happened within the past week which is I got the courage to ask them to do an inquiry. Yes, finally I got the "yes I can do that" by the DOS operator. Before I never got that so I am very thankful to God.

Yes it is definately due to the country where he is from, its basically Delhi with a few million less people but a few million more lazy officials. There was a great reform of the embassy a couple months back with taking people out who gave visas for bribe money and now lot of US officials are there and the check ups are more detailed. But what got to me was some people I know from there got their visas even with common names. (they are coming to the US next week) ..thats what frazzles me but I am feeling good that at least I was able to voice my concern for the delays.

Thanks for keepin contact, I do know that the prayers of good hearts always comes true.

May God help us all, through the visa journey and beyond.

Tammy

there's no rhyme or reason to it and that's why I feel as if my intelligence is being insulted on a daily basis.

With the recent AP inquires coming up, I thought it would be beneficial for you guys to read through this, it flushes out lot of the things that may make AP longer...I know how you all feel.

Tammy

bump for moral support.

Maybe i'm imagining things, but when we were in Essaouira in Al Maghreb, it seemed like cats were very well loved and appreciated by the local folks. I've seen cats wander into hotel restaurants at breakfast in Casablanca and no one even looked twice. When I've seen that happen in other places, people panic, throw shoes, yell obscenities, etc.

My question is, do Moroccans along the coast or any other specific groups in Al Maghreb have any special cultural feelings towards cats? It seemed that way. I never saw people shooing away cats or being to them like i have in other places, and it was very nice.

Stop the personal digs in this thread, please.

If anything I've typed is out of line, then please let me know via PM and I will prevent that type of language from being used. I have taken care not to type anything that violates the TOS, but if I have, please let me know. I'm new to the MENA section, so I don't know the written and unwritten rules here.

You know...I don't see how some of you ladies find it ok to call Khengool a nimwit and other put downs but when he fires back, all of a sudden its a violation of TOS. If you can dish it out, then you need to be prepared to take it.

Thanks JP.

There's a whole lotta typin' and very little reading and comprehending in many of the posts in this thread!

She's preggers and ur giving her this kind of advice!

Where is the tearing my hair out smilie? Nagi u LIED! He is not a nice person he is a jerk no a

hater

or something else not nice!

She should calm down a little because it's not good for relationships. Is that bad advice?

Really?

Well honey just give it right back to him that you're not going to live like that! Stand up for yourself and say, "This is my house, I am an American, things are different here, I get to do and say what I want pretty much and I'm not going to have my freedoms impeded on, I'm going to share my life with you and that doesn't mean you get control what I do or what I say because I can't live like that."

You most certainly did in the first place. But as we've learned it's not uncommon for mena males and females not to take responsibility for anything they did.

I see, me observing that some people were looking for trouble when there wasn't any was egg slinging.

Why am I not surprised by your comment about MENA people and your attitude?

I'll let you think about that one yourself.

I was born, raised, educated, and continue to live in the U.S. My household was more American and Christian influenced than Iranian and Muslim influenced because my parents moved here as teenagers. If anything, my behavior is more indicative of my American upbringing than my Iranian heritage. Imagine that. I'm just as American as you are, sister, but without the arrogance.

First , you are very arrogant yourself.

That's your opinion and you're entitled to it. It may or may not be correct, although many that aren't very bright often mistake a higher level of intelligence for being arrogant.

Second, stop insulting the people of this country and our personalities.

I was making another observation that seems to be right on.

I have met tons of Iranians here and they suffer from many of the same things Americans that are native to this country suffer from. Materialism, greed, cultural differences between parents and kids etc.

Is this meant to imply that I'm not an American native?

Sunni Islam and its practicioners practice a very very different islam from Shia ( Iranians) Your religion allows muta, marriage for one hour or one day or one week. The culture can be very different from some of our mena husbands( Iranian culture) I will tell you right now, You being being Iranian doesn't mean a damn thing to me as far as credibility or me listening to you or you telling me "how mena culture is or isnt" You are not even from the same ethnicity or religion or lifestyle as my husband . How you could come on here proclaiming any kind of expertise in MENA or arabs is beyond me because Farsi has no relationship with arabic and sunni islam has ABSOLUTELY no similarity with Shia in lifestyle, marriage or practice. If someone in Iran wants to marry, they can marry for 2 weeks and its completely ok.

Did i claim I knew anything about Arabic language? Did I claim I know anything about sunni islam? did i proclaim any kind of expertise in MENA or arabs?

Sunnis are alot more restricted in their lifestyle. If I was married to someone who could marry a hooker 3 blocks away, not tell me about it and then divorce her and then get another and then marry again and again all LEGALLY IN shia islam, I sure wouldnt worry about infidelity.

Is this relevant to anything I've typed at all?

( this is ABSOLUTELY NOT A DIG TO THE SISTERS MARRIED TO IRANIANS HERE>.. Its to make a point to this nitwit. You dont see any of the women married to Iranians trying to tell me about the lifestyle or culture of my husband because they know there are huge differences..... Iranian men can muta and legally and easily. Sunni men are bound by a heck of alot of laws that makes swapping out chicks pretty easy and legally.

Are you sure that's what you meant?

I just find you to be on here to show everyone YOUR ARROGANCE,,, not to provide support and care for the rest of us..

And frankly I need it from my friends here..

that's for sure!!!

Well honey just give it right back to him that you're not going to live like that! Stand up for yourself and say, "This is my house, I am an American, things are different here, I get to do and say what I want pretty much and I'm not going to have my freedoms impeded on, I'm going to share my life with you and that doesn't mean you get control what I do or what I say because I can't live like that."

You most certainly did in the first place. But as we've learned it's not uncommon for mena males and females not to take responsibility for anything they did.

I see, me observing that some people were looking for trouble when there wasn't any was egg slinging.

Why am I not surprised by your comment about MENA people and your attitude?

I'll let you think about that one yourself.

I was born, raised, educated, and continue to live in the U.S. My household was more American and Christian influenced than Iranian and Muslim influenced because my parents moved here as teenagers. If anything, my behavior is more indicative of my American upbringing than my Iranian heritage. Imagine that. I'm just as American as you are, sister, but without the arrogance.

First , you are very arrogant yourself. Second, stop insulting the people of this country and our personalities. I have met tons of Iranians here and they suffer from many of the same things Americans that are native to this country suffer from. Materialism, greed, cultural differences between parents and kids etc.

Sunni Islam and its practicioners practice a very very different islam from Shia ( Iranians) Your religion allows muta, marriage for one hour or one day or one week. The culture can be very different from some of our mena husbands( Iranian culture) I will tell you right now, You being being Iranian doesn't mean a damn thing to me as far as credibility or me listening to you or you telling me "how mena culture is or isnt" You are not even from the same ethnicity or religion or lifestyle as my husband . How you could come on here proclaiming any kind of expertise in MENA or arabs is beyond me because Farsi has no relationship with arabic and sunni islam has ABSOLUTELY no similarity with Shia in lifestyle, marriage or practice. If someone in Iran wants to marry, they can marry for 2 weeks and its completely ok.

Sunnis are alot more restricted in their lifestyle. If I was married to someone who could marry a hooker 3 blocks away, not tell me about it and then divorce her and then get another and then marry again and again all LEGALLY IN shia islam, I sure wouldnt worry about infidelity.

( this is ABSOLUTELY NOT A DIG TO THE SISTERS MARRIED TO IRANIANS HERE>.. Its to make a point to this nitwit. You dont see any of the women married to Iranians trying to tell me about the lifestyle or culture of my husband because they know there are huge differences..... Iranian men can muta and legally and easily. Sunni men are bound by a heck of alot of laws that makes swapping out chicks pretty easy and legally.

I just find you to be on here to show everyone YOUR ARROGANCE,,, not to provide support and care for the rest of us..

And frankly I need it from my friends here..

Dear H.I.T.,

I'm a little bit confused.

When did i ever say anything about the intricacies of our differing sects of religion?

From what I gather, you aren't too bright.

It's this impulsive e-behavior that may have gotten you here in the first place.

Please be mindful of the things you say, and be very sure to keep that quick temper laced with American entitlement that you have in check. Your husband's family and friends won't be very receptive to that. I've seen it before, and it's always the same story. If you act like that, then every time there is a non-married Arab woman around his friends and family will be saying "tsk tsk, what was wrong with Jamilah and the other girls around that Abdel couldn't marry one of them?" There's a woman in our family like that. I usually feel sorry for her... until she opens her big fat mouth and changes my mind EVERY SINGLE TIME.

Overreacting is the #1 cause of trouble in shaky relationships. You've done a fine job of showing that here. I'm sorry that things are difficult for you, but if you relax a bit and think before lashing out, then things on this website, at work, and at home will be much better for you.

regards,

khengool

Dear Khengool:

I am married to an Iranian Chemical Engineer. It took about 4 months for AP to clear.

So if your fiance is not a man and does not have a profession which could be considered "dual purpose" (ie used to harm USA) then I don't think you have to wait too long.

Be prepared that the Embassy will ask for a resume at the last minute. They did for us.

Can you afford to leave USA, your job (which may be the foundation of showing financial stability to sponsor your fiance) just to wait for a few months in Iran until the AP clears?

I, too, wanted to quit my job and go and wait with my husband. But I also knew I needed to be financialy stable here in the USA for the time when he came. To provide food and a place to live. So I hung in and waited for the AP to clear (but did get very depressed as others here would confirm). I am glad I did. It would have been much harder for my husband and I to come back at the same time. Then for me to look for work and an apartment while he could not (since he has to wait for his social security card).

Think about it before you do anything.

Tina

Thanks, Tina.

I have definitely thought about it quite a bit.

I went to Ankara with her a month ago and spent some time in Iran as well.

I almost did not come back at that time.

There is no way that once our non-legal wedding ceremony takes place that I will even think of leaving her alone again. It's not something that I can do as a husband. I'm not worried about the finances. I live comfortably in California, but I have no problem taking another job somewhere else where the income/housing ratio is better, if needed.

What would you do? Go back to Iran and live there for a few months and then come back with her together? Let's say you both come back together....you and her would both be at home, while you look for a job. Do you have enough savings to tide the both of you over for the time you are out of work? Is you house/apartment situation one where you can afford not to work for a few months? Does quiting your job, jeopardize your Affidavit of Support as sponsor?

Since you have recently spent time together in Ankara, try to not get so frustrated by this relatively short seperation period. In reality it is short time compared to others. Instead bide your time...Like I said, you may not have to wait endless months. Maybe a couple months only.

We have sufficient assets to remain in Iran for a year or two until she has a visa and I find work.

I've always wanted to live in iran for an extended period, the opportunity just never presented itself.

Not getting the visa in a timely manner is facilitating that dream of mine. There's always a silver lining if you look hard enough!

Well honey just give it right back to him that you're not going to live like that! Stand up for yourself and say, "This is my house, I am an American, things are different here, I get to do and say what I want pretty much and I'm not going to have my freedoms impeded on, I'm going to share my life with you and that doesn't mean you get control what I do or what I say because I can't live like that."

You most certainly did in the first place. But as we've learned it's not uncommon for mena males and females not to take responsibility for anything they did.

I see, me observing that some people were looking for trouble when there wasn't any was egg slinging.

Why am I not surprised by your comment about MENA people and your attitude?

I'll let you think about that one yourself.

I was born, raised, educated, and continue to live in the U.S. My household was more American and Christian influenced than Iranian and Muslim influenced because my parents moved here as teenagers. If anything, my behavior is more indicative of my American upbringing than my Iranian heritage. Imagine that. I'm just as American as you are, sister, but without the arrogance.

Thank you! Slings egg back at khengool!

Doesn't slinging an egg back at someone necessitate them slinging one in the first place? last I checked, I didn't.

I like how you implied something about hijabs on a PM but not on a public forum... gotta problem with hijabies?

yeah wool hijabs??

1. wife wears hijab
2. i was trying to help
3. merino wool is cooler than cotton.
4. why are you so combative?
5. i was replying to your post in another thread http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...5&start=435

i hate to be the one to pop ur little bubble there but i lived in pak in 130 degree summers COTTON works sure there is some wool that works but cotton for the most part works better than any wool out there.......even the men in pak dont use wool in the summer i dont know what ur summers are like in ur country but wool for the most part is NOT the answer but thank you very much for the post about it

Berbers seem to do fine in wool jelabas... the problem may be that lightweight merino stuff isn't readily available in the shapes and patterns that some of us need, so custom stuff may be needed.

I like how you implied something about hijabs on a PM but not on a public forum... gotta problem with hijabies?

yeah wool hijabs??

1. wife wears hijab
2. i was trying to help
3. merino wool is cooler than cotton.
4. why are you so combative?
5. i was replying to your post in another thread http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...5&start=435

If indeed you were trying to be helpful than I appreciate it. I apologize if I came off as combative... I am in a mood

no problem. i miss my wife today, just as you miss your husband.

Someone give me those eggs to sling!

some of you guys are so quick to type and so slow to read and comprehend.

thanks for paying attention, Julianna.

I like how you implied something about hijabs on a PM but not on a public forum... gotta problem with hijabies?

yeah wool hijabs??

1. wife wears hijab
2. i was trying to help
3. merino wool is cooler than cotton.
4. why are you so combative?
5. i was replying to your post in another thread http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...5&start=435