chaishai

Sometimes when you see the tight=clothes hijab combo its being worn more out of a cultural instinct rather than a religious one. the girls might not even have been practicing muslims. Just like sometimes you see women drape a pretty scarf over their hair as a fashion statement not a religious practice. I'm not making excuses or anything just saying its always a possibility. now if they were in bikinis and hijab that might be a different story there's no excuse for that haha

I actually disagree that the girls in morocco with tight jeans and head scarfs are likely wearing it for cultural reasons vs. religious. They were likely raised wearing scarves, want to be fashionable and they could be very religious in their hearts.

In israel you will see young orthodox girls/women who cover their elbows and wear skirts but all of it is very fashionable and tight, and consider themselves very orthodox but they just push the envelope and try to keep up with modern fashion.

A multivitamin/mineral supplement with a tall glass of water before going to sleep.

The thing in Galt's header. or "Berocca" tablets from the UK.

my husband goes back to syria all the time without me. its only for a few weeks as he never had alot of vacation time so he needed to get back here.

there are alot of men that do go home for a month at a time. its a long trip so they save up all their vacation for that.

i think your over reacting. how on earth did you manage without his paychecks?

It sounds like overreacting to me as well, or control issues. How can you afford for both of you to go in a few months but he cant just go now? If he wants to do it on credit, have him do it on his credit alone and let him do it but I dont see it as marriage ending.

My day is very very long. My husband woke me at 4am doubled over in pain. We were in the ER all day. Please say a prayer for my Ibrahim, he is very sick.

Jax

i hope he is OK!!!!

I could see a 10 year age gap working - lets say the guy is 27 and the woman is 37 but the they are compatible, of same education level give or take and if the guy has had experienced. For the life of me I cannot understand how a male virgin who has never kissed anyone else before can marry a woman has been with one or many men and pushed out a bunch of kids. I just see no way that could be a real relationship. Anything is possible, but I dont think that the majority would be genuine. Especially if she can no longer have kids, then isnt the dynamic in some circumstances that the husband would become another one of the kids? If the cultural norm is for the man to wear the pants in the family yet the wife has had the most experience, how does that work?

Update:

He has flown 2766 miles. He has 3480 more to go. Flying at 518 mph at 36,000 feet~~soon to be approaching Iceland (wait til he hits Chicago-land, he will feel like he's in Iceland ..lol)

Jackie is there a site where you can track flights live that you are seeing this? If so can you share the link, that is neat!

While maybe not necessary, I think it's very considerate and respectful of your son that you thought to have your SO live elsewhere for a couple of months before moving in. I've never thought much of it before, but it must be quite strange for some kids to have a man they've never met move into their home. JMHO.

This is a really good idea and most likely what I would do if I were in that situation. My kids would freak otherwise!

that cat actually looks like jack nicholson!

10 years this august.... So old!!!

I need some opinions please...

I try to be a good wife and respect my husband to the fullest, just as he respects me. However, we are having a horrible disagreement as of late. We have two kids together, the oldest has been to his home country (when a baby) and met all his family...however I was with the child at the time when we went for a visit. But now we have another child, 7 months old, and he wants this child to go visit his family as well. Without me. I've said to him not without me because the child is still a baby, needs mommy, I will miss all the firsts! He says I am being selfish and his family deserves to see the child and spend time with it. I agree they do...but only if I come too, and money right now is very tight, there's no way we can afford for all 4 of us to go. He is insisting I make the passport and I am refusing.

I know it is killing his mom to not see our newest addition, but I can't bear the thought of parting with my baby for a month or more! He thinks I am refusing because I think they are going to try to keep the kids there. I know his mother would never do that to me, so this isn't even an issue, I just really and truthfully don't want to be apart from my baby.

Does anyone have suggestions for me? I really need some advice, should I let the baby go? Should I stand my ground and refuse? Have any of you let your husbands take the kids overseas without you?

I appreciate any advice, but please be gentle (but firm) with me, this is really a sensitive matter for me.

Hope you all have a good day!

I have been with my husband for 12 years, he is a great dad, I know his family well, all 8 of his brothers and sisters plus parents live in Israel, my kids are not babies anymore and I still would absolutely never let my kids travel without me anywhere out of the country, or probably anywhere else for that matter. Because G-d forbid something happened to them while I was not there to protect them, I would never live with myself. I cant imagine taking a baby. I cant imagine a middle eastern family expecting a baby to come without their mother.

As an aside, once I did let my husband travel to Israel with my son before I arrived a few days later, as I took a different flight because of business. He traveled alone with my oldest son on the flight. The plane ride with the then 9mo old was so horrific he said he would never do it again! So maybe you should tell him the horror stories of traveling alone with babies!

Awww, thanks for everyone's replies. I feel for those in the same position. My mom would probably commit a felony to stop our wedding. I agree with Jenn. My mom does not have to like my fiance but at least respect him and don't be rude! When we get married I think things will get slightly better although that is wishful thinking. My mom is pretty tough.

Maybe you're right...when we have kids? Maybe? Little Moroccan grandchildren? Haha, I could visualize my mom's disgusted face now!

How could your mom be disgusted by her grandchildren. That wont happen. My mom and I have different tastes in what we find attractive, but she thinks her little moroccan/tunisian/american grandkids are adorable.

At first he was willing to go on Friday, but then he realized that Friday is Eid and said no, they can come to us on our holiday. I told him that was stupid, why would they come to us if we don't go to them. We got into it last night again cause I told him he's making it all too hard and just about rules and how HE interprets them. I'm really frustrated! I don't think of it as a religious holiday either, nor does anyone I've talked to. But I can't get that through his thick Egyptian head! I told him at one point, I'll go alone. He put his foot down and said no, it's not your holiday, you can't. Last I checked I'm still American, so it IS my holiday. And I know plenty of Muslims who are "celebrating" it. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Im not muslim, but I converted to judaism and I went through/go through similar stuff from time to time. We are not religious, but we do not have any christian holidays in our house. We go to my sisters for xmas dinner, but its always the same argument every year. Its not that he really worries that hes doing something wrong, he is just trying to control the situation and ensure that his family and his children will not by any chance become anything but jewish. I had to explain also years ago about thanksgiving but he got it. Also even the chassidic jews around here do thanksgiving so that helps. In fact, I have to host thanksgiving to make xmas easier, otherwise its "they never come to us". But I predict once again I will struggle around going to my sisters for xmas like i do every year. I even had him call a chassidic rabbi to get advice and he was told to go, but not eat (yeah right) and not to sit around singing carols lol.

Anyway again, not muslim but can relate. If I were you I would hold your ground.

My 21 yo Nathan became very ill suddenly ! He was diagnosed with H1N1 and Pneumonia. I am actually more concerned with the Pneumonia bc of all the media hype and false positives over the flu virus. His temp has been running really high and I just returned home with the antibiotics. The doc said if he doesn't start to improve in the next 24-48 hours, he may end up in the hospital. I pray that is not the outcome and he will be feeling much better soon

not to be alarmist but if I were in that situation i would take him to the emergency room and insist that he be checked in.

you want two daughters both named aminah?

I know it sounds silly, but my mother in law is sooooo sweet, i love her so much. my mother in law is basically my new mom, and I would love to honor her that way.

My own mother doesn't even speak to me anymore (2 years now) because I'm muslim (by my father's side of the family) and I'm remarried......imagine your own mom not wanting to speak to you or even allow you in her house anymore........but I've made peace with it for my own sanity. My father passed away 14 years ago before all of this, but i know he would NEVER treat me like that, I was a daddy's girl all the way.

My father side is partly Muslim, but my father was not observant, so basically, I had to teach myself over many years about Islam and being observant. My mom took great offense to this many years ago.........but that's her choice to reject me as her daughter.........it's a great lesson of how i DON't want to treat my own children

I don't think the 2 Aminah's would mind, since they have different fathers. I would hope they understand my reasons

hey if its good enough for george foreman!

I talked to Asad this morning, he said they took the tube out of her and shes awake. This afternoon he said shes doing even better and shes talking. Im so happy!

just reading all of this and glad that she is getting better!

Hi everyone! I just wanted to share the good news with all of you that our little boy, Adam, arrived on 10/15 - 8 lbs 2 oz. and 20". Wadi and I are so happy and so in love with him. Here are a couple of pics:

he is adorable!!!!!!!

Good day ladies! Adam bought a 2 weeks supply of Nicotene patches. He said he wants to quit. I tell you, it is cheaper than 2 cartons of cigs thats for sure. Does anyone know if anyone had much luck with the nicorette patches??? I really REALLY hope that this will work for him and that he sticks with it until hes rid of it all.

people i know have had better luck with the gum. get the coated kind tho, the non coated tastes like cardboard

Honestly I wouldn't post that story. My husband isn't super super jealous but if he ever read something like that I think it would hurt his feelings. That's just my two cents though and just my thoughts but bear in mind I got rid of everything related to my ex's before he came here just to avoid any type of issues. I did that because more than a few mena members were talking about how upset their husbands got when they found pics, love letters, etc. about old boyfriends. What's funny though is that we've gone through my photo albums together a few times now and each time he asks me why I don't have pics of my old boyfriends. lol. I do still have my wedding album but I had explained beforehand that the kids wanted me to keep it and since he knows how much I hate my ex he doesn't have a problem with it.

this is going to have to be one of my top priorities when we get home. i wasn't expecting A to come home with us, so i still have a lotttttt of photos and stuff on my computer that needs to be deleted. not because i was sitting around reminiscing over them, just because i am busy and didn't have time to weed through years of photos

Well it depends on your husband, you know? My husband grew up in a very strict muslim neighborhood where no one dated so I think for him to see the pictures, etc. he really wouldn't understand. Maybe he would, now I'll never know, but I'm glad I got rid of the old stuff.

Im the reverse situation. I always got rid of my photos throughout the years - i tend to date similar type A "aggressive" types and the end to all prior relationships that i have had except for the superficial were BAD.... so i never wanted to remember and got rid of them. Meanwhile picture happy israelis chronicle every moment of their life so i have boxes and boxes of photos of my husbands life and i DO get jealous when i see his beautiful ex girlfriends! he dated some really gorgeous women. Not because he dated them, but because now I have no history of my ex boyfriends so share also!

I wish my ex had gotten rid of his love letters and photos. I guess my kids will never have to worry about love letters since no one sends snail mail love letters anymore. I can remember getting them in the mail and being so excited to read them. Waiting for the postman to come, etc. lol. Anyways I remember after I moved into his apt after we were married I stumbled upon "the drawer" that contained things from two of the love-of-his-life's. Well from that day forward I always compared myself to them. Drove me bonkers!

I love my blackberry facebook internet etc... but there is an interesting guy andrew something who writes about how social media is killing culture, and hes right! how awesome was it to smell the letter to see if it smelled like the guy!!! not going to happen anymore...

Honestly I wouldn't post that story. My husband isn't super super jealous but if he ever read something like that I think it would hurt his feelings. That's just my two cents though and just my thoughts but bear in mind I got rid of everything related to my ex's before he came here just to avoid any type of issues. I did that because more than a few mena members were talking about how upset their husbands got when they found pics, love letters, etc. about old boyfriends. What's funny though is that we've gone through my photo albums together a few times now and each time he asks me why I don't have pics of my old boyfriends. lol. I do still have my wedding album but I had explained beforehand that the kids wanted me to keep it and since he knows how much I hate my ex he doesn't have a problem with it.

this is going to have to be one of my top priorities when we get home. i wasn't expecting A to come home with us, so i still have a lotttttt of photos and stuff on my computer that needs to be deleted. not because i was sitting around reminiscing over them, just because i am busy and didn't have time to weed through years of photos

Well it depends on your husband, you know? My husband grew up in a very strict muslim neighborhood where no one dated so I think for him to see the pictures, etc. he really wouldn't understand. Maybe he would, now I'll never know, but I'm glad I got rid of the old stuff.

Im the reverse situation. I always got rid of my photos throughout the years - i tend to date similar type A "aggressive" types and the end to all prior relationships that i have had except for the superficial were BAD.... so i never wanted to remember and got rid of them. Meanwhile picture happy israelis chronicle every moment of their life so i have boxes and boxes of photos of my husbands life and i DO get jealous when i see his beautiful ex girlfriends! he dated some really gorgeous women. Not because he dated them, but because now I have no history of my ex boyfriends so share also!

Hey all! It's Friday - but a melancholy one at that. I really think that 9/11 should be a national holiday. It just feels wrong that it's so significant and yet now it seems like *poof* life goes on, which I don't think it should be so forgotten. Hmmmmm.

Kelly, why not get Sofyan a "Z" charm for his necklace (I think I saw him in one of your pics with one???) Correct? No? We gave my hubby's mom an E charm for Enzo. She loved it. That way it's a gift with a sentimental purpose too.

the problem with national holidays is people will use it as an excuse to drink beer and bbq vs. remember (not that there is anything wrong with beer and bbqs). in israel on their equivalent of memorial day the whole country observes a full few minutes i forget how many of silence. and people really do it, they pull over to the side of the road bow their heads and its just amazing. after that its back to work as normal vs. celebration. however its a little different when the country is the size of new jersey, i cant see something liek that happening all over the US>

Thanks LaL I'll have to look into the AOS forum. I've been updating my best friend and Mom almost daily and my best friend yelled over the phone the other day, "Geesh can he make up his mind!?"

Waleed and I spoke yesterday and he said he is thinking he would fly with his Sister to Baltimore and stay with her until Thanksgiving Break when he can catch me in Boise. I'm sorta sad I'll miss his first snow here and that he'll only have 3 weeks with me in Moscow on my campus when I get him. He'll be super cold too. His Sister said if her Husband isn't with her yet to take care of the kids she'll just have to take time off from her work and studies then. That her Husband can't give up the lawsuit now while he's already gone before the newspapers and television. Mom says if Waleed's going to go for a month that two months isn't going to make much more of a different anyways he might as well stay until December when my finals are over and meet us in Boise for Christmas to start our life. I haven't suggested that to him but I did go over that it's more reasonable for Mahmoud to keep the girls with him and have extended family help him while his Sister goes ahead. Waleed said they are nearly 2 and 5 and have never been separated from their Mom before and the Dad has never been a single parent before. My Mom agrees that no Mom is going to leave her little kids behind. I don't have kids so I don't really know but I'm still thinking to write the Sister and explain the stress and risks this is putting on my family and discuss their other options. Waleed wants to handle it himself.

Update: The visa says the same movement as yesterday. "Scheduled for delivery as agreed."

he probably wont be without you for his first snow, i doubt it will snow before thanksgiving in baltimore. im sure it has happened but it doesnt usually.

oh and i wouldnt write the sister to say that she is giving you stress, sounds like she is in stress herself, not good for family relations. i have a 2 and 6 year old and wouldnt leave them except in the case of urgent business for a couple of days.

Thanks LaL I'll have to look into the AOS forum. I've been updating my best friend and Mom almost daily and my best friend yelled over the phone the other day, "Geesh can he make up his mind!?"

Waleed and I spoke yesterday and he said he is thinking he would fly with his Sister to Baltimore and stay with her until Thanksgiving Break when he can catch me in Boise. I'm sorta sad I'll miss his first snow here and that he'll only have 3 weeks with me in Moscow on my campus when I get him. He'll be super cold too. His Sister said if her Husband isn't with her yet to take care of the kids she'll just have to take time off from her work and studies then. That her Husband can't give up the lawsuit now while he's already gone before the newspapers and television. Mom says if Waleed's going to go for a month that two months isn't going to make much more of a different anyways he might as well stay until December when my finals are over and meet us in Boise for Christmas to start our life. I haven't suggested that to him but I did go over that it's more reasonable for Mahmoud to keep the girls with him and have extended family help him while his Sister goes ahead. Waleed said they are nearly 2 and 5 and have never been separated from their Mom before and the Dad has never been a single parent before. My Mom agrees that no Mom is going to leave her little kids behind. I don't have kids so I don't really know but I'm still thinking to write the Sister and explain the stress and risks this is putting on my family and discuss their other options. Waleed wants to handle it himself.

Update: The visa says the same movement as yesterday. "Scheduled for delivery as agreed."

he probably wont be without you for his first snow, i doubt it will snow before thanksgiving in baltimore. im sure it has happened but it doesnt usually.

if you had a timeline i would guess that your ________ was touched by uscis? do i win a prize?

i was really hoping for something more interesting!

I need a nice homemade muhammara recipe... help a sistah here!

everytime i hear muhammara i think of that song from the muppet show. remember?!

been busy mowing the yard, running the lawn sweeper, burned off some brush, and even found time to swat bumblebees with a rake. so far about 12 dead bumblebees.

i keep finding dead bees on the floor of my house. do i have a hive?