Chantelle

I can't believe I am yet again forced to repeat myself. I am NOT complaining. I started a discussion because I was curious what people found in themselves after their SO arrived after all that time apart. If you all want to read more into it, that's fine. But my position remains, I simply wanted to discuss. But then again, its Thursday and time to wind up for the Friday night fights. I won't be participating in the usual rubbish.

Well I just want to Thank you for your post. I thought the point was to discuss emotional baggage that the process may have left you or your SO with or maybe just to vent...or express frustration at the whole process. I guess I expected that it would all be over once my sweetie was here but it just irritates me knowing I have to again go to an interview to prove my love to him. He is here. That is true that is all that matters and for those who's SO isn't here yet I think after that person arrives and they are in bliss they will understand...if they don't already how damn annoying it is when time starts ticking and the next step in the process is due..rudely interrupting the blissful happiness that Citizens of the same country who fall in love get to continue on without ever having to struggle with...I don't think your post was insensitive at all. But people will always have their own opinions. all I want to say is Thanks. I feel better having vented

This questions is aimed mostly at those who have reunited after a very long wait in the visa process, but not exclusively for obvious reasons. Did you discover you had developed emotional "baggage" as a result of the visa process and your temporary separation?

I have discovered a few very ugly little "bags" so I'm curious if its just my own insanity or if this is a common side effect.

I think the whole visa process was very stressful...the longing for eachother and the torture of being apart was really just HARD and stressful and now that I have got what I wanted I find myself thinking " we had to go through all that..to get this?" Not that I am not greatful because I am and he is wonderful but I just feel that they really put us through the ringer making us prove our love was real when even a blind person could have seen it because it shined so brightly to now making me feel just exhausted and pissed off at the fact that I will have to jump these hoops again for the adjustment of status paperwork. He feels bad for stressing me out and making things difficult with me having to take of work for our appt which is like in a different CITY. We don't blame eachother at all for things but I guess we just are tired of people poking in our business..we just want to be like any other couple in America...just let us love eachother and enjoy eachother..well I guess my emotional baggage is resentment about how difficult and time consuming the process is and relief to be together but stressed about the future things..I mean I am sure they will all get approved but enough is enough I feel. You know I served 4 years active Duty as a female Marine...I could have been in medical school then instead of getting my late start. I think the least my country could do is let me marry whoever the heck I want to marry from where ever they are from after the 4 years of service I have given to them...call me bitter..or maybe it's just cause I am young and unrealistic but it just doesn't seem fair. HOWEVER I have my sweetie here with me now and all is well so WHATEVER! but I really think this process is horrible and really needs to be reevaluated...Can you tell I just went to the social security office yesterday and had to deal with someone who had never even heard of a K1 while applying for his social with him..ha ha I guess she just irked me. I have had enough with government workers for now yet we still have a long way to go with them. I know they are just doing their job...and I should be greatful but I had to vent..excuse me all. I hope you can understand.

Hey everyone. I am the one American girl who went to another country and fell in love with an asian man! Just kidding ha ha..you often see Americans that are Men with asian females but hardly American females with asian men...but thereare some of us and I am one of them! Wasn't that K1 process hell? I really felt stressed and upset..I must have cried like 50 times..just being apart from him for so long and the seemingly endless waiting. BUT, alas we are together and it's all paid off..although I must admit I am now stressed by the work authorization thing we need to get and the SSN and the adjustment of status....Now I realize why there are so many illegal aliens...legally immigrating is tough and taxing...trying on your patience and emotions...I mean you have to really love someone to put up with the drama of dealing with government workers..lol... I told my husband in our next life we better be from the same country cause I don't think I can handle this again. LOL We fell in love....2 years ago...and I always went to see him in Korea.....cuz I have friends there and like many Korean singers and went to see concerts and stuff...but one time I could not take vacation from work...so I said "you should just come visit me here." So he bought a ticket and took vacation from work only to be turned away at his 1st US stop "Detroit" because they said "you are here to visit your fiance? then you need a fiance visa." I thought it was some kind of joke..who even knew there was such a thing? we were just two young kids in love who ddin't know the 1st thing about immigration. I mean when I went to korea they just let me in..they didn't ask me who, what, why, where, or anything!! So I thought that would be the samefor him coming here..since he had a round trip ticket and all. Well anyways you can imagine the borken hearts and tears when he was sent back home the next morning without me ever seeing him and we lost the plane ticket money too...which wasn't easy to save up..I felt like I would just Die...and I called in for my 1st ever sick day from work. CRUSHED emotionally beyond repair..or so I thought..but with help from my boss and a lawyer we applied for a K1 in May 2005 and I flew to Korea to be with my honey at his interview and they asked him like 20 questions...then me like 40 questions then him like 20 more questions and finally we got it. My baby and I arrived here together October 21st in the US. No trouble in Dallas our 1st US stop..just a nice big "welcome to America!" Thank god! His parents flew in for the wedding which happened Dec. 2nd in the middle of a snow storm lol but it happened and now we are Mr. and Mrs. Kim Happy days...however the whole next bunch of paperwork and fees is already taking it's toll on me mentally BUT most important is that my sweetie is here! Where we go from here can only be good since we are no longer going alone but together!