Erick and Marj

3 hours ago, aquila said:

Congrats and wishing you all the best in life. ✌ 

Thank you!!!

Hello everyone,

Sorry for not being very present here. School and work take up most of my time leaving me with the little I have left to spend with my wife. I just wanted to post here and update that my wife who filed back at the end of July, finally received her approval notice today, with no interview. We should receive a notification of the green card being mailed soon I think. If I'm not mistaken, our next step after she gets her green card is to get her SSN Card updated to remove the conditions off of it. Other than that, I think it is moving on with life and not forgetting to renew the green card in a few years. It has been a great help to have support from the people on this forum and I wish the best for everyone else. I will try to poke my nose in from time to time and offer my own contributions to help others as well. 

My wife's combo card arrived yesterday!!! She wants to get back to having a normal life and working again. I'm happy that she is no longer restricted.

Hello everyone.

I didn't realized there was a group for this and just discovered it. My wife and I filed her AOS packet at the end of July and received her NOA in the early part of August. Just this last week her EAD and AP were approved on Wednesday the 12th. Still no word on her AOS and her case number is still coming up as not a valid case. I am aware that there is time to wait still. Generally how long before the case number is in their system?

Everyone has their own situation. I am sorry to hear that you are away from home most of the day. That is a problem in itself for any marriage. My personal opinion is 7 weeks is too long. 2-3 weeks max. There is a ton of things she needs to be doing. English lessons maybe? Job resume and searches? Learn the transportation systems and local places? Does she have a driver's license? You guys can share the domestic duties but being home allows her to do an item or 2 a day just to help out. Do some charity work. Check out the ethnic communities and support groups. However, hanging out with the family is just going to cause you a ton of problems. Does she think family comes first before you? Is her family now your family and you're expected to support her support them? Is age a factor where emotional maturity makes her want to spend more time in the comfort of her own family. Check out the Philippine forum. I bet there a lot of threads with similar themes. A word of warning. 2 items. 1) Don't get trapped into financial supporting her family. 2) Don't let her take a job that belongs to a family member or family friend. You are part of a 2 person relationship. Boundaries and lines sometimes have to be drawn for the heath of the relationship. You are trying to cater to her feelings. What? You don't have feelings in this? If she is not at least considering your feelings than she is being a bit selfish.Yes, she uprooted herself but she should have been prepared knowing the situation. Right now what you describe your life as is an extended vacation for the two of you.

Thank you for your response. There are some hang ups, and I'll share them for context, but don't want to be ridiculed. Our situation is a bit more complicated. I'm completing my 2nd college degree. This is my final year. As it is right now, I am student teaching to become an elementary school teacher. The college made arrangements for me to teach near my parents' home so that we would be able to live somewhere rent-free and they can provide for her basic needs until I finish in December and am back to work again. By then, she will also be working. I have an apartment in the city where the college is located and we'll be moving in at the end of December. Part of her concerns isn't just lonliness, but also being a distraction to me from what she acknowledges as very important not just to me, but also for both of our future. She is doing her best to not be a distraction to me, which, admittedly, I would agree along with her, can be the case, though I believe, now, after getting into my 3rd week, I can handle the double responsibility of giving her time as well as completing my requirements to successfully pass my professional semester. With that said, I have enough money saved up to pay expenses through December, but not extra for her to do a lot of other things. This also is the reason why I haven't pushed her to a drivers license because then I would have the added expense of high insurance for a new driver in the U.S. Yes, I do have other money set aside. I won't be broke, but that other money is intentionally invested for me to put a down payment on our own house in the future, so I'm not about to resorting to using that money unless it is critical for me to do so. Transportation options are somewhat limited. I have family that all live in walking distance, but let's face it, spending everyday with the in-law's family can get really tough, really fast. She's not really comfortable with going around the house and touching things, even though she has been given full privilege and access to use or do whatever she wants to in the house.

Yes. There are some issues with the living arrangement, and I don't like it just as much as I'm sure plenty of you are cringing while reading this. We both agreed that this would be how we would get by until December and it was this or wait another year before she came to get married. Neither of us wanted to spend another whole year being separated. I thought I could handle 6 weeks or so, but as it turns out, going into week 3, I'm missing her terribly. I'm trying to do the best I can to support her needs to adjust to a new country and culture and that's what has brought me here is to find out if I'm in trouble for giving her that time to go spend with some relatives or if I'm risking our ability to stay together in the U.S. by allowing her to be away for that long of a time. For me, I also feel like 3 weeks should be enough, but I also know that right now, she isn't sitting around with nothing to do because her cousin is teaching her how to cook for me and keeping her distracted from the time where she isn't able to be employed.

I sent her a long message and told her that I understand her needs and respect the fact that she gave up living near her parents and siblings to be with me, but I love her and would very much like for her to come back home next weekend.

Don't worry about the supporting family business. I haven't sent a penny overseas since she arrived and it's not that I'm opposed to helping them out from time to time. I'm fine with that, but I won't be their income and she knows that. Part of the reason was okay with making this decision is because she was the breadwinner for her family and she wanted to encourage her sisters to take some responsibility in providing for their own families so now with her gone, they have no choice but to do that. One sister has gotten a job overseas to send money home to help for her child. (Not the best idea, but it was her choice and I pray all goes well for her.) The other sister is completing college and will be expected to get a job after graduation so she can start to hold her own weight. In the mean time she is getting some support form her relatives here in the U.S. to get her through college.

Each to their own, solo Honeymoon?

We went on a getaway. Not really feeling like calling it a honeymoon because we want to have a longer trip further away so we are saving up money for that. We did spend 10 days away on a trip together starting the day after the wedding. We have taken multiple other day trips to different local events or attractions as well. Other time was consumed with wedding thank yous, completing the AOS packet, going to Philippines events held locally.

I sent her a message. She is out having dinner with her family right now. I would personally prefer that she comes home. Yeah. I sympathize with her. I didn't bring her here to be my in-house maid. I don't expect her to clean the house and cook by herself. I'd prefer we do those things together. I just don't want her to get into a depression out of lonliness from being home by herself all day while I am gone. Once she can start working, then she will be busy for 6-8 hours of the day that I am gone and that will make her time pass much more quickly, however it is until that work authorization comes that she feels like she's sitting on her hands with nowhere to go and nothing to do.

During the first few months of your marriage?

We spent the first 2 months together, travelling, going to events and meeting friends and family.

She knew this going in.

No one said she used you... you did.

Fair enough. Greg said if it was his wife, not mine. What is your recommendation for what I should do with her upon bring her promptly back to be with me? What should she do with her time while she waits another month and a half to get her authorization to work? I can't take her with me to work. I have to leave her home alone until I get back.

I understand that, however I'm not home, so we can't spend the time together. I leave at 6 am and don't get home some nights until 9 or 10 pm. Which means she is home by herself the entire day. If I wasn't away so long, then she wouldn't take such a long trip. I'm sure a lot of people have their impressions and would like to stereotype my wife as a woman that used me to get into the country and is now looking to run away, but she isn't that type. I'm not looking for judgments on her or my character, but wanting to know if it i a problem for us to stay together her in the U.S. by us being apart for this long?

Hello. My wife is from the Philippines. We just got married in the beginning of July. Less than 2 weeks ago, my wife left on a trip to New York and I started student teaching. My schedule is very full so we figured this was a good time for her to go visit her cousin, aunt, and uncle that she hasn't seen since she was a child. She wants to begin working, but until then, she's bored so she's happy to have people she knows around to keep her busy and occupy her time as she waits. Based on the average timelines that I see, it seems that we may not be seeing a work authorization until the beginning of November. She is thinking she would like to stay in New York until the last week of October so that she doesn't have to sit here and be bored. I understand her concerns and want to accommodate her needs as much as possible. I'm concerned about the length of time. Will she be fine to stay away for 7 weeks with us not living together? She left most of her possessions here, taking only what she would need for her temporary visit. We are doing this with all of the best of intentions and I only want to be sure that her needs are met. Should I be concerned about her being gone that long?

I'm going to be filing for adjustment of status very soon and I want to be sure I understand correctly. My current income does not meet the 125% poverty requirements so my mother who works full time with the same employer for over 15 years is going to co sponsor my fiancee. I want to be sure I understand correctly. I am submitting an I-864 for myself, an I-864 for my mother as the co-sponsor, and an I-864a for my mother because I already have income that she will be adding to. Is that correct?

I have flown China Airlines (not Air China which is a different airline) several times. China Airlines is based in Taiwan, not mainland China. Their service (including the food) has been good, flights were always on time, and they have the best schedules from the west coast (not sure about from MN). I would recommend them.

I have never flown Air China, too many horror stories from others about them. Long flight delays, passengers are totally on their own, never given any information about how long the delay is, or worse yet left stranded when flights are canceled and passengers are not rebooked on any other flight. But again, I have never personally flown on Air China so that is only what I have heard not experienced.

Yeah, that's exactly my concerns. I want her to fly through Tokyo. I have been in both major Tokyo airports more than a half a dozen times and I find the airport to be very easy to navigate, the people are friendly and trained in English, and overall, the experience is very good. Plus, having an option to fly her direct to minneapolis from Tokyo is a huge plus. It means I can meet her right on the other side of immigration and she doesn't have to worry about transferring baggage at the airport after clearing customs.

You can book before CFO. I did. Just schedule the seminar at least 2 weeks before departure.

That isn't a problem. She'll be going for the CFO in 2 weeks, but won't be coming here until middle of May. I will book the flight next week after my credit card billing cycle starts a new one. I just don't want the price of this flight to go up. I doubt it will considering how many seats are empty and how far out we are, but who knows. Would actually be nice if the price dropped in the next few days. LOL Would be super awesome if it would go down to $1000 or less. Wishful thinking for such a good flight I suppose.

Thanks. I checked over a dozen different flight search options and The cheap end flights were all with either 1 or more ridiculously short or long layovers. The only one I found that was moderately balanced was with China Air, and honestly, it's a personal thing, I just don't trust the Chinese airline companies. With that said, I found a spectacular flight with Delta, just as you had mentioned. It has a very comfortable 4 hour layover in Tokyo, and then a straight shot to Minnesota. The total travel time is only 18.5 hours. I really like that flight arrangement. The catch is the price is steeper. It is $1200. I'm willing to pay that price for better comfort for her and more piece of mind for me. I am not sure if I should book yet. She still has to complete her CFO in 2 weeks. I feel like I should be waiting until after her CFO.

Erik on a side note and maybe you mentioned this before but why a 3 month hole in your timeline?

After our petition arrived in Manila, I did not have the money saved up to afford her interview and medical exam. I sunk it all into tuition. While I was home for a month, I was able to get full time hours in and I made enough to pay for all of that, plus my tuition is lower 2nd semester, I got a bunch of financial aid, and I will be working a 3rd job so I can put more money away in the bank since my tuition is covered completely for the semester now. As for the gap to when we get married, also because of school. Better to get married in the summer when I can spend more time and focus on her without studies so we scheduled a July wedding. The summer weather will be more comfortable for her to start out in. In the grand scheme of things, it's hard to wait longer, but it is the best thing to do in the interest of starting out our marriage and her life here in the U.S.

My fiancee was approved for her visa today. Now I need to book her flight to the U.S. I have to get her to Minnesota. What airlines is the most reliable. I was suggested to check out St. Raphael Travel and Tours to book the flight on a discount. I am not familiar with the airlines available and I am pretty sure I have read some scary stories about flights before. What advice and feedback does anyone have for me to get her hear safely and on time with all of her luggage, while also being able to be somewhat conscious of a tight budget?

Hello everyone! I know I haven't been around much. School keeps me super busy. I just wanted to stop and say thank you to all of you for your support. Marjorie had her interview today and she passed it!!! My beautiful bride-to-be will be coming to the United States and never again will we need to be apart from each other.

Interview was super easy she said. They didn't ask for any supporting documents at all. Only chatted for 2 minutes. They asked 4 questions. Who is your petitioner, what is your fiance's address, if I had been married before, and there was one more but I'm so overwhelmed right now I simply can't remember what it was. Her CFO is in 2 weeks but I have been told it is a piece of cake and she will pass with no trouble at all. Her expected arrival is May 16th right after I get done with exams and our wedding date is July 9th.

Yes that's correct. First name, maiden name, husband last name.

Yup. single - Mary Ann Brown married - Mary Brown Smith

Thanks, then that is how we will do everything. Her interview is in a couple of weeks. We are ready to finish this final stage in the visa process so we can relax a little bit until she arrives and then we start a whole new adventure.

That is the traditional name change for the Philippines; middle name is changed to their surname from when single. My wife did that.

Marriage certificate is signed in your maiden name if memory serves.

When you apply for the green card you use your NEW MARRIED NAME. S.S. may or may not give you issues, my wife had zero issues with S.S. (applied for her card two days after we were married) using her new married name, but we got lucky, most personal behind the counter seem to be borderline idiots at SSA. I read many times idiots at SSA not even letting a person use their married name UNTIL after then get their green card.

Rule #1: After you are married start to use your new married name for EVERYTHING. No special forms or documents required. (SSA may give you issues on this, but once you are done with your green card changing the SS card over to your married name is easy)

- side note. Not using the traditional married name can cause issues later with the Philippines government doing ROM, and passport renewal in the married name. Highly recommend using the traditional married name format.

So when you say traditional married name format, you are referring to how she changes her middle name to her maiden name and then takes her husband's last name, correct? Just want to be sure I understand correctly.

I know this is something that is still a little ways away for us, but the thought came to mind today so I just want to ask while I'm thinking about it.

After we get married, my fiancee wishes to change her middle name to her current last name and take my last name for her last name (vs. how we traditionally just change the last name in the U.S.) I understand this is a normal thing for Filipinas that get married. My question is what processes we must go through with the name change? She should sign the marriage certificate with her new full name right? When we apply for her green card and social security number, should she also use her new name? Do we need to do any specific paperwork related to her name changing from Marj A. N. to Marj N. S.? Thanks for any help.

Happy to share that our brief pause in our visa process has finally ended. I got Marjorie scheduled for her interview. Will be mailing documents probably right after the holiday next week. Praying for her to have confidence and a positive attitude at her interview. I'm sure we have this in the bag.

Is the Intended Point of Entry important? I obviously have not booked a flight since she does not have a visa yet, so it isn't certain where her point of entry will be. I would like for her to enter at Washington because I have had pleasant experiences with customs and immigration there in the past, but I don't know for sure that she will be connecting there. Does it matter if what I point doesn't end up being the POE for her in reality?

Thanks for sharing this. This really is a very reassuring message to read. I shared with my fiancee. We have missed each other so much. Been over 5 months since we last saw each other and yet another Christmas where we have to be apart. God willing, her interview will go as beautifully as yours did and she'll be nearly ready to jump on the plane. Can't wait to see my Mahal.

It's all explained here for you http://dennyeyberg.wix.com/filipino-am-visa#!manila-process-usem/c95x

You need to go online and print off a receipt for payment. Next she takes it to the bank. Once she has it returned to her from the bank paid then you can check your status to schedule your appointment. Give it about 8-12 hours after you make the payment. Watch out for the "gotchas" when paying your visa fee. You'll find those at my website.

Next after payment is complete your DS-160 and prepare for the medical and CFO. You'll need NBI and CENOMAR that are not older than 6 months at time of the interview. That's listed at the website too.

Good luck

Thanks. The steps are clear to me, I just wasn't sure if they were restricted to a specific order in which they must be completed. It does appear that there is a little flexibility in that the application can be started even before she has paid the fee. She will go next Monday after she receives the money and pay the fee, but I want to get started on her application ahead of time.

She just went this last week and took care of her NBI and CENOMAR. As soon as I confirm that we have all our ducks in order, I will schedule her interview and her medical exam in Manila. I'll get her documents mailed and lastly book her hotel and airfare.

You can do either ways.. Fill the DS-160 first or pay the fee, it doesn't matter. And yes you can schedule the interview without filling the DS-160 yet.

Thanks. That's what I thought. Going to send her the money today to pay her application fee. Will start to fill out her application as much as I can this week and then finish up with her and she will have to review and sign it. Then I can get her stuff mailed to her and we can schedule an interview!!!