RosaMystica7

Ah William33 is a name that I recognized right away! I'm happy to see that you're a moderator now. The last Frenchie was just commenting on how hard living with a French can be, I believe. But yeah, my old username was aselano. We had been talking about how, when we got our religious wedding, we'd combine our last names into one new one and that was going to be it. Ah well.

Yes, being married to a French is very hard. I didn't think it would be, because Europeans and Americans have so much in common. But yes he had a very different mentality, which in time turned into a very condescending one. I heard a lot about "you stupid Americans" after he settled in. I'm not patriotic but I don't appreciate being called stupid or having my country that just welcomed him bashed, either. And just... so many things about his culture that he was SO SURE were right in his and SO SURE were wrong in mine, and I was like well can't we just respect each other's cultures and agree that we do things differently? We don't need right and wrong and blame and finger-pointing here. But no I always had to be wrong. Bah, anyway.

It'd be great if the sponsorship were void! My mom, the co-sponsor, would be relieved too. I didn't think it'd be over until his 2-year greencard expired, because with his greencard comes the ability to re-enter the country? It should be expiring in a few months, I think. Hmm. Maybe I should just write a letter stating that he left the country on such-and-such date with no intention to return and we're pending a divorce once I can afford to pay for it, and include the change of address just in case? Cover all my bases. I dunno.

Thanks for moving this Krikit, I've never been very good at forum placement here since I always just hung around in the K-1 section, occasionally hopping over to the France/America couples hang-out.

I'm glad to see a few people remember me! Haha. *waves*

Well, we did try. I pushed on for a year and a half. I kept trying to get him to go to counseling, he kept promising he would and not going. And I don't want to give too many details but... you know... sometimes you just need to realize that you married the wrong person, the marriage is only getting worse and worse, and even in some sad cases you need to realize that the marriage is dangerous and be honest with yourself about that. I was so hard on myself after I stepped up and broke off the marriage, but it was what needed to be done, and I know I've learned a lot for the next guy.

Anyway! Thanks for giving me the link to the I-865. I'm so nervous about filling it out, every single time I ever have, I've been months late. Now here I am 7 months late! My memory just sucks.

I have to forward my ex's tax info to him anyways, so if I'm supposed to let him know about some change of address that he's supposed to do, I'll tell him then. I mean, I don't want to be unfair, getting him into any government trouble or anything. Granted, it should be him that does his own research but hey, I was always the one doing the immigration research and telling him what we needed to get done so I may as well be that way til the absolute end.

I just wanted to poke my head in and say hello, and see if any of my old friends are still here. I'm curious to see how everyone turned out, how many are still together, how they're doing. Does anyone still remember me?

In case anyone does... well, lol I remember saying I wouldn't leave VJ after my then-fiance got here but it just didn't work out that way. Life got so hectic once he was here, not only cuz of his arrival and getting used to living together and getting married, but because my dad died and then our financial situation got rocky, as did our marriage. Then we ended up moving from NY to FL, which made it even rockier. I won't get into details but it just got beyond the point of repair and we broke up in August, we'll get the divorce when I can afford to pay for it. I guess, stress tests a bond, and ours failed that test royally. LOL.

But yeah, in the hecticness, I AGAIN forgot to fill out my... dang I don't even remember what it's called... sponsor change of address thingy? It's like 7 months late! I've been late every single freakin time I've needed to fill that thing out. Anyone wanna re-assure me that they won't show up at my doorstep with a fine or handcuffs when I fill it out this time? Thanks.

And too, was my ex required to fill out a change of address when he left the country? What happens if I fill out my change of address and he doesn't?

Anyway... that was a mix of a... hello, introduction, seeking old friends, update, and question all in one shot. So. Kinda weird way to crash back into the forum but... I guess it works, lol.

I was just poking my head in to say hello... and wow, I'm happy to see that this post is still here after all this time. Well, my Frenchie and I have been separated since August, will be divorced when I can afford it. I hope all of you have happier stories than I did. Anyone here still from my time on VJ that remembers me? I'm kinda curious.

Thank you!

Hiya, I wasn't sure where to put this... sorry if this is the wrong place. My husband and I have decided to seperate, and he went back to France. How long can he be out of the country before his 2-year greencard is no longer valid? I just want to know how long we have to fix things up and make a decision on if we're getting back together or not. >.<

Thanks! I can't believe we've been married a year already, it went SO FAST!

And aww Nico, I know what you mean. VJ was my main source of support during our time apart because, while others tried to understand, only the people I met on VJ totally understood. After someone posted something similar to what I just did, I kept reminding both him and I, "once we get through this it'll be like a nightmare in the past and it won't be so bad" and it helped strengthen us to push through. I have to admit, a big part of me doubted what I was saying, I figured that was the experience of some people and wouldn't be the experience that we had. It's pretty funny to be the one saying it now!

Humm, how we made it through our 15 months... he bought 2 webcams and mailed me one, so that we could see each other. He'd leave it on when he went to bed so he could see me til he fell asleep. His lunch break happened to be when I was waking up with the time difference, so he was my alarm clock, and we'd talk for a while when I woke up. Then my lunch break was when he'd just gotten home from work so I'd call him... and then we'd put on the webcams when I got home, which was usually around midnight for him. Some nights, too, instead of the webcam we'd talk on the phone til we both fell asleep. He had a plan where he could call unlimited anywhere in France and North America, so leaving the phone on the entire night til one of us rolled onto it and it shut off wasn't an issue.

I'm a creative type so, for special days, I'd make a scrapbook page and mail it to him. I also scrapbooked photos of his 2 visits, and momentos that I saved from them. Any jokes we made up online or on the phone I'd scrapbook sometimes too. Then when he was missing me he'd look through it... sometimes when he missed me he needed to distract himself, sometimes he needed his fill of good memories instead.

For the times that I needed to distract myself, I have a stamp collection... thousands and thousands of stamps to be organized. Love it! I like making graphics online, too. Exercise is always good too, some form of that, maybe with some headphones and music to keep your mind from wandering. Basically find hobbies that fit you and that you can put all of yourself into, so that the next time you look up it's like oh wow that was two hours!

You'll get through it!

*phew* Thank you, I feel much better!

So we filed our taxes today, and a change of address was mentioned because one W2 was in New York and the other in Florida and then I remembered... ooooooh shoooooot... me (sponsor), my mom (co-sponsor), and I never did our change of address forms from when we moved... IN OCTOBER. Argh we completely forgot.

So I pulled up the I-865 and it asks the effective date of change of address. Uhm, the rule is don't lie to the government right, but... I'm going to put October there and admit that I'm 5 months late in filing this form? Is there a penalty for that? I feel so stupid.

(Oh and I'm sorry if this is the wrong section... I haven't been on VJ in, like, a year and was confused reading over the sections.)

Hi! I don't know how many people are still here that will remember me. Well, our first wedding anniversary is coming up and so I just remembered VJ and thought I should come back to encourage you all a little!

We spent 15 months apart while waiting for all the preparations to be ready for the K-1 and then the filing time and whatnot. People on VJ told me that, once they were together, it all felt like a distant nightmare and a different lifetime... and that made me feel better, even though I wasn't sure how true it'd be for us. Well it's true for us too. We've been married for a year but we feel like we can't remember one day without each other. Yes the 15 months apart was torture... there were so many days where we felt like we just couldn't do it anymore, but yet we knew it was worth it to push through. It might take forever, or it might just feel like it's taking forever... but it'll all be over, you'll be together, and then it'll just be a nightmare in your past. So no matter how long it takes, don't giveg up - you can get through it!

Looks like there aren't many people in here anymore after the GC.

I try to come on when I can, but unfortunately that's not often. We're moving to Florida in less than two weeks so things are insane, and it's a rather sad time in our lives so it's emotionally draining too.

Congrats to everyone who's gotten EADs and GCs, and a few kicks to MSC/CSC for those who are still waiting.

It's the same site. https://egov.uscis.gov/cris/jsps/index.jsp Go down to the bottom and click login.

I was out of work because my Dad was dying, and I wanted to spend as much time with him as I could before he passed. I had enough money saved up for my husband and I to get by frugally for a few months with no income, but not enough to qualify as his sponsor (I was his K-1 sponsor). My Dad wanted to sponsor my husband, but he died before he could, he told mom to sponsor my husband instead because he knew he wouldn't make it. He died just a few days before we filed for AOS.

it seems that all NY offices are back up with cases so far i dnt see any NYers getting their Interview dates .... oh no this waiting game is driving me crazy ... HELP!!!

Hey, I'm a New Yorker and our case got transferred to CSC and approved quickly. I believe I saw another New Yorker that got a CSC transfer too, I'm not sure who. So maybe NY being backed up with cases could work in your favor - maybe they'll dump some cases on CSC to clear out their workload, and one of them will be yours!

I'm not saying that I agree with the way they do things. But I've read about more people have NOT gone to their cancelled interviews and then been told that they're denied than I've read about people who have gone and been told that it's really cancelled. I even remember reading about a VJer who moved from CA to NY... they filed their change of address, called to confirm their change of address... an interview notice was sent to their CA address and, because they didn't show up in CA, they were denied. How stupid is that?

Yes, definitely go to the interview anyway. If they turn you down and tell you that your interview was really cancelled, then it was. But there have been a lot of cases on here where people didn't go to their cancelled interview and their case was denied!

Oops ok, I'll remove it, I'm sorry. My profile is set on private so I don't think the public can see it, but I don't know who would re-post it.

I posted it in my myspace, any publicity is better than none. I hope they find her.

Thanks!

I have an interesting subject for us to talk about... I didn't think it'd be one that we'd run up against. Predjudice against French. SC and I have had to deal with nasty remarks about French a few times lately. Like at a garage sale we ran at mom's house, one guy rambled on for about a good 20 minutes about how the French didn't help Americans in the war however many years ago and all these other reasons that he hates French people... AFTER SC told him that he's from France! And today while driving the car in front of us had a bumper sticker that said "Boycott France" with a French flag with a line through it. I thought the days of the "freedom fries" instead of "french fries" were over but I guess not. Has anyone else run into this?

Congrats ELW! (And anyone I've missed since I haven't been able to read much. )

Zoltan, it's been a while since we filled out packet 3... I'm not sure if anything changed, and honestly, it was such an adrenaline-rushing time period that I don't remember what he filled out/sent back and what he didn't! Sorry. Hopefully you got an answer by now, either on the K-1 forum or otherwise.

And just an update... we received my husband's greencard today! No more USCIS til 2009!

My husband's greencard arrived in the mail today. I just wanted to thank everyone for all the help... between the K-1 process and this, I wouldn't have even known what to do without VJ. We'll be moving to Florida October 19th, along with my mom, to start over after the loss of my Dad and to be closer to my family. This will definitely add to the start over, we'll finally be able to be a "normal" couple with him being able to work! He's thrilled about that, he's just itching to work, but right now his "work" is carrying and reaching all the stuff that my mom and I can't, he's stronger AND taller lol. He's been an amazing help with packing and getting ready to move.

I wish the best of luck to everyone still waiting, especially those of you stuck in namechecks.

Thanks again, everyone!

Oh cool, so we'll have two friends down there.

Speaking of greencard... WE GOT IT TODAY! Wow it's small, it's much easier for him to carry around than his passport.

We'll be in New Port Richey, Florida.