disillusioned

Conveniently, I can't afford a lawyer right now, so if I'm asked why I haven't filed I can truthfully say I can't afford to, and I've applied for a loan.

Thanks for all of your help.

I haven't filed the divorce. Right now he has no legal rights to the baby because the baby was born before we married and my ex was not in the country, so he is not on the birth certificate. He is definitely the father though. He is abusive, so I don't want him getting rights to the baby. If I file for divorce, per multiple lawyers, I have to address custody and visitation. If I do nothing, he doesn't see the baby unless he initiates a paternity proceeding. He won't do that.

There are financial risks to staying married to him. And that stinks. But the custody issues are way more important. I have to protect the baby. So I am not going to initiate anything that ends up with him having time with the baby and maybe stealing him back to his country. It is very, very hard in this state to deny visitation. I don't want to go down that road.

I also can't get a protective order unless he credibly threatens me, which he hasn't done.

I don't trust the family court system as far as I can spit. Right now I have 100% control of the baby - I won't give it up voluntarily...

I'm glad I have the date - I can take some time to think about this. I believe they'll deny him whether I go or not. I have reason to believe he may become vindictive if I'm too aggressive against him. If he will be denied without my doing anything further then I may leave it alone. They have 3 letters from me in the local office already. It may be like poking a stick at a cobra to do any more.

I suppose if I provoke him into any kind of documented strike against me then he'll be likely to be deported. But I have a small child, I don't know whether I want to invite an attack.

Just got a notification they scheduled an interview for the middle of next month. I have the exact date. So I can make an infopass any time prior to that.

But if he goes and I'm not there, won't they deny him anyway?...

as I understand 'the basis of filing' here -

IMO it's best that you show up at the interview and give over YET another withdrawal letter.

USCIS is slow sometimes, but for an interview for a green card, the federal workers pay attention, for about 10 minutes, on that life-event (scheduled interview date/time) .

Sure, yer 'spouse' might show up also, but in the same breath - if USCIS failed to get the withdrawal letter into the casefile , prior, well - this is the time, this is the day, to make it happen.

I was thinking of going to the local office prior to the date - this would mean they have the case file in the building, right?...

Thank you everyone. At the second infopass I got a receipt for all three different letters that I wrote, I got the agent (past the screening window). The agent said she would send them to the officer with the file. That was 2.5 weeks ago. She said I may get a letter from NBC that they got my letter, or I may get nothing. So far nothing.

Also - I have to make a confession - I reversed genders on my post because I was sure my spouse would look here to see if I were pulling the I-864. I am the wife / USC, he is the husband. The rest is true - he is gone, he is living in the local community from his culture.

I got a notification from uscis this week that they scheduled an interview at the local office. Is that normal? I guess they don't just deny because I withdrew the I-864, they want to talk to him? But when I am not there with him, they won't put him through unless he tries VAWA, right?

Thank you all...

Also - I don't know if he changed his address with them, I know they won't tell me that either. But he did forward his mail from my apartment. So when they send him the interview date, I won't see anything. We are not in contact (even though we have a baby). That is fine with me. I don't know whether he is going to try to get me to come with him to his interview and fake it. I won't do it, no way.

perhaps is a nomenclature issue?

What you are withdrawing, is the I-864, Affadavit of Support, that you signed.

Yes, that is what I told her. The I-864. She says you can't withdraw that. So I read her the rule and she says well I can't help you go to the office. I made an appointment for Monday.

Ok I am making another infopass appointment I sent the second letter it was delivered yesterday the customer service line tells me the same thing - you can't withdraw. I ask for a supervisor. Again - you can't withdraw. I read her the policy from uscis site that says yes I can. she says there is nothing she can do make an infopass. So now another day off from work to go again to the infopass. Where they told me they won't take the letter and I should mail and then call.

This is getting ridiculous. I am very disgusted.

That's what I thought.

They called me back. This time it's a lady she says that I can't say just "I want to withdraw I-864" I have to give them a reason. I made sure she knows the card is not issued yet. She tells me I have to mail another letter that says I am filing for divorce. The first letter just says effective immediately I withdraw I-864, I talked to a lawyer he said just put that. So they have that letter already. This lady says put another one saying I'm getting a divorce and I don't have to notarize it. Ok so I already wrote another letter tomorrow is Saturday I will mail it in the regular mail because I can't go to the post office tomorrow. Then Monday I will mail another copy but that one I will get notarized and mail it certified because Monday I can do that. Then they will have three different notifications so they better not screw it up. And this lady also told me go to local office - who told me they can't do anything, go to National Benefits Center. It seems they are a mess.

Thanks

Thank you everyone for the replies. I mailed letters Monday to Chicago and National Benefits Center. Certified mail. They were delivered yesterday. I called the customer service today to confirm they got it and did it and the agent said I can't withdraw the I-864 form. I said I think I can withdraw because the card isn't issued yet. He said no he just asked that is wrong I can't withdraw it the only thing he can do is give me the supervisor. I said ok then they transferred me it said the wait was 128 minutes and they can call back if you want. So I said ok to that and I am waiting for a call.

Also I made Infopass for last Monday and the agent I saw there said they don't take the letter at the local office because the case is at National Benefits Center. He said it looks like it would be 4 to 6 weeks before it would get looked at there. But he would not take a copy just said to put it in the mail.

This is hard and they always make everything even harder.

Thank you.

Ok, thank you.

I have the address in Chicago that I sent I-485. Also I have NOA1 for AOS with an address for National Benefits center. I will use both plus Infopass.

Thank you.

Best in this case to send it too many places than not enough. I would hit USCIS, the service center processing the application, make an infopass and submit there also. Maybe even contact ICE. The letter should be notarized. Better to send everywhere you can think of because she came on a K-1 and it is likely there will be no interview.

Can she change address with them? Won't it come to my house that is the address on all the forms.

What address for USCIS if you know?

Thank you.

Wow sorry to hear that. There is no specific address in the rule. It has been recommended to sent a notarized letter withdrawing the affidavit and explaining why the affidavit is withdrawn with as much information on the immigrant as possible to the address where the I485 was filed AND scheduling an infopass appointment to put the letter directly into the hands of an immigration officer.

Once you do this then it is recommended that all contact with the immigrant be broken off completely. You do not want to do anything that may be interpreted as mental or physical abuse.

Once you withdraw your affidavit your obligation is over and the immigrant is on their own. Good luck!

Thank you. I made an appointment. I don't know where she is and we are not talking. I got the address from my copy of the I-485.

Thanks.

Hello what address do I use to withdraw I-864 form? I need to notarize it? Do I send anything else?

I am waiting for adjustment of status for my wife she came on K1 now she went off with people from her country.

Please help me on how to stop it thank you.