xoxo77

Maybe you can also ask other husbands who are married to women where your wife is from. That will help a lot. Try to join organizations in your area that will make her more comfortable and feel a little more at home. There has to be a reason why she's acting as such.

Wow! Sorry to read about your anguish over 'inter-racial marriage' dude! I'd say it's really very hard to adjust. First of all, everything is just DIFFERENT. From culture, to language, educational and family background, weather, food, lifestyle, even religion or sometimes if not your case-- BIG AGE difference and so on and so forth. I don't blame you. I myself is having a hard time adjusting to an American husband, pretty much having a hard time adjusting to a progressive society. It's very hard. He get's impatient, frustrated,annoyed, grouchy, disappointed, lost and confused lol name all those negative feelings you feel right now and that's what he had to experience with me times 5 coz we've been married for 5 years now.lol =)

The scariest story I can tell you was when we had this crazy disagreement I walked out of the house to avoid him and the next thing had happened was there were ambulance, firetruck and cop cars. Yes, I wreck. I thought I died. That was my turning point. It was his too. My husband isn't the softy teary sensitive guy. Although he's not showy, I feel that he cared and was scared to lose me.

I couldn't afford to lose this battle. I refuse to give up on him. Sure he's not perfect, and Im not either. Tell me who is? Ask yourself..WHAT's your priority in life dude? If your priorities aren't well established then you need to. You don't have a LIFETIME to keep repeating same old mistake like what others did.

Marriage is not about whirlwind romance. It's building a relationship over time. It's what defines you and builds your character being the man and husband in the house. It's about accountability & responsibility to be the head in the household.

Don't blame each other. Just talk and be open to one another. What needs & wants arent met. Learn to be patient. Like us, we still have disagreements here and there. God healed our emotional vulnerabilities. Im thankful for that.

Love and get hurt, get hurt and learn, learn and let go, let go and grow, grow and love each other again. That's my motto.

God bless you brother. I'll pray for you.

mavie_77

I751: 08/19/08

NOA1: 08/26/08

BIOMETRICs: 09/16/08

Immigrant spouse and American spouses, It all depends on your surroundings, what kind of people you meet and interact with, I have no complain against american women, I dated in the past and could have marry any one of them it just was not meant to be faith had it otherwise. Lot of misconception regarding foreign spouses, I've been to India several times and was in charge of some outsourcing software project there, so i became very familiar with the people, the culture, that's how I met my wife, She wanted me to move and live there, was not too kin to leave her friends, family and surrounding, but when we look at what's best for both of us, We realized it's best if she moved here instead of me staying in India. People have lost of misconception, and even foreigners also, they think american women are easy, not faithful, play around, lot of negativity, my folks were married for 30years, most of my relatives been married for generation and specially i have one of my dear friends was still a virgin at the age of 30, she's smart, gorgeous, educated, the perfect southern creole belle from St Rose New Orleans, but at the time I could never see myself in a long distance relationship miles away but in the same country little did I know that a few years later my fiance would be waters away to a dfiferent, country land, time zone.

Thanks for expounding this topic sir. The 'people i meet and interact with' arent the same that I interacted with before. I work with Americanos men and women when i was still back in the country of origin, and they are all pleasant and friendly. Dear hubby's she-friends made me cry blood....that's how I describe my situation here sir. My message was about how I was treated and it wasnt about American women in general. Probably Ms. Kentucky jst didnt seem to understand my english composition. Cant blame her, I talk and write english but I will never be 100% accurate in expressing my thoughts.

Met dear hubby through a credit card issuing institution that outsourced customer service support. Started out as friends ...Dear hubby is an existing customer and I used to be the QA officer..aihihihi. Although I've had a profile made by a good friend of mine in match.com I couldnt use it anyway unless I pay thru a credit card, I didnt have one . God bless to you all.

Filipinas have this glowing womanhood image of frugality, faithfulness, sensitivity, patience, perseverance, thoughtfulness and diligence. We appreciate hard work and do not believe in divorce, we are willing understand and do extra sacrifices. If this isn't true, then why does USCIS marriage statisitics report that " marriages from foreign spouses have lower divorce rate than the nation as a whole?" …"fully 80% of these marriages having lasted over the years for which reports are available. This isn't a just a word of mouth, It's somehow true.

I don't blame dear hubby's she-friends criticizing him about our relationship.. that's all they are-- closed-minded, hypocrite, arrogant, ignorant, brat and rude. I'm not saying this to offend all American women, this is based according to my personal encounter and experiences with dear hubby's she-friends. They're dying from envy..lol.

It isn't about wanting a wife to be a slave. It isn't about marrying someone submissive and weak. It's about building a lasting relationship, it's about reality and the truth is that American men found that relationship from a foreign spouse, a seasoned rock in a foreign land. .

This has nothing to do with "Filipinas" specifically. Take note there are many a foreign man married to an American woman on just this board alone.

My husband had every English woman in town tossing a hissy fit when they found out he had met and was marrying an American woman. I was nit picked with a fine tooth comb for any possible flaw they could find!

I am faithfull, thoughtful, patient, sensitive and want a lasting relatioship with my husband as well.........does that make me a filipina?

Every time this topic comes up I want to scream...THERE ARE GOOD MEN AND WOMEN FROM ANY COUNTRY IN THE WORLD.

So you got one bad apple and have to travel thousands of miles to find a spouse? This still doesn't make sense. My personal story I did not go looking for a foreign spouse, it just happened we met and fell in love. To each his own but I would not go in search of a spouse anywhere in the world, it just seems like desperation to me.

Many post in the forum for life in America after arrival, that have a fiancee running off a moment after she arrives are typically from one specific country. What if all of us American women started jumping on that and saying how much better we are than that particular group? It is hogwash just because 8 of the 10 post my fiancee/wife ran off with another man once she arrived in the states, does not make every woman from that region a money grubbing, ho-bag that wanted a green card and free trip to the states. So I wish some would lay off the whole "I am better than you.........because" rubbish!

This is my personal opinion about the topic madame, it's my point of view and by any means not harsh to anyone reading it unless you are affected and hurt because it's true to you and by any means you are entitled to your own defensive opinion. That's why I said: I'm not saying this to offend all American women, this is based according to my personal encounter and experiences with dear hubby's she-friends. comprende??? And about the ho-bag, gold digger filipina..oh yeah we did condemn that lesbo madame, and we feel sorry for the Amerikano about it. God bless your heart ma'am and your briton hubby. There's no reason for you to be angry, because you aren't like them are you?? PEACE.

I Had my interview yesterday and got approved i was lucky to have a nice filipino interviewer very approachable but when i saw my final interviewer i thought i'm goin had an heart attact if my guess was right based on his features described by people whom he put in AR i told to myself how lucky iam...good thing i was really prepared all my documents was in order and very organized, even he had lots of question i think i stayed in his cubicle for 15mins he was nice enough for me. i will tell more about my interview experience some other time...for now let me say thank you very much to all of you...vj is a great help for me thru direct or by reading others experiences shared by members.

I just checked delbros and this is what i found?

INFO DATE INFO DESCRIPTION

5/9/2007 5:11:26 PM SHIPMENT RECEIVED AT DISTRIBUTION CENTER

5/9/2007 5:05:24 PM SHIPMENT IN PROCESS

5/9/2007 11:12:01 AM SHIPMENT RELEASED BY THE EMBASSY

5/8/2007 2:55:56 PM SHIPMENT PROCESS IN THE EMBASSY

is this mean that they already relesead my visa? my interview was only yesterday the 8th.

CONTRATULATIONS

I was in class last week discussing political views on our immigration system here in the U.S., with men and women petitioning relatives especially fiancees to enter the U.S. Some of the outspoken opinions were very mannerable and calm, while majority of the others were choatic and harsh. For example, one woman stated that, "men should not be able to bring a woman in from another country because all they want is slaves, the 60's and 50's are long gone!" So to get our mines off our fiancees for a little bit if we can, lol, I welcome your insight on this particular view?

Thanks,

Austin

There is a time for everything. A time to forgive and a time to forget the painful relationships in the past. A time to pick up the the broken pieces and start a new life. A time find a real woman who will stick by your side rain or shine.

Dear hubby has never been so proud than being married to a foreign spouse. Let me tell you why according to my personal opinion. I am inside out every inch a foreign spouse and a Filipina. And the reason why dear hubby chose to travel 11,000 miles away from where he lives is because he was looking for a gem. Not all that glitters in your own backyard are gems, if you all know what I’m trying to mean.

Filipinas have this glowing womanhood image of frugality, faithfulness, sensitivity, patience, perseverance, thoughtfulness and diligence. We appreciate hard work and do not believe in divorce, we are willing understand and do extra sacrifices. If this isn’t true, then why does USCIS marriage statisitics report that “ marriages from foreign spouses have lower divorce rate than the nation as a whole?” …”fully 80% of these marriages having lasted over the years for which reports are available. This isn’t a just a word of mouth, It’s somehow true.

I don’t blame dear hubby’s she-friends criticizing him about our relationship.. that’s all they are-- closed-minded, hypocrite, arrogant, ignorant, brat and rude. I’m not saying this to offend all American women, this is based according to my personal encounter and experiences with dear hubby’s she-friends. They're dying from envy..lol.

It isn’t about wanting a wife to be a slave. It isn’t about marrying someone submissive and weak. It’s about building a lasting relationship, it’s about reality and the truth is that American men found that relationship from a foreign spouse, a seasoned rock in a foreign land. .

HI, BESIDES WESTERN UNION, DOES ANY ONE KNOW HOW TO SEND MONEY OVERSEAS AND THE MONEY GO DIRECTLY INTO MY FIANCEE'S BANK ACCOUNT.

THANKS IN ADVANCE

OPEN ANOTHER

*CHECK CARD OR

* DEBIT CARD OR

*ATM CARD

IN YOUR EXISTING CREDIT UNION OR BANK.

THEN MAIL THE CARD THRU

*UPS OR

*DHL OR

* FEDEX.

THERE WILL BE NO FEE FOR WIRING A MONEY. NO HASSLE NO WORRIES.

THIS CARD SOULD WORK IN THE PHILIPPINES AS LONG AS YOU SEE A

*VISA OR

*CIRRUS OR

*PLUS OR

*STAR LOGO ON IT

XOOM/ LBC PADALA/ WU IS OK BUT WHY WOULD YOU PAY FOR WIRING A MONEY IF YOU DONT REALLY HAVE TO. YOU CAN DO THIS THRU YOUR BANK OR CREDIT UNION. THEY'D BE GLAD TO ASSIST YOU OPEN ONE.GO FOR IT, SOME DONT EVEN HAVE A MAINTAINING BALANCE.

THE BOTTOM LINE IS IT'S FREE TO WIRE THE MONEY.THAT'S IT.

I think the US should try out a points-based system; seems to work well for Canada and Australia...and they should target workers with skills that are necessary to the US economy. This will allow highly-qualified workers from around the world to come to the US to work. I would still favor a cap and quotas for this category, but I think it would make things easier for everyone.

I'm in favor of family-based immigration when it comes to spouses and minor children of both USCs and LPRs...I look less favorably on some of the other categories. I'm not prepared to actively push to ban those categories, but I won't be upset if they get rid of them either.

I agree with your idea about point-based system. Surely mother dear is an extremely highly skilled individual. But the thing about the US immigration in Manila, is they're pretty strict when it comes to tourist visa. Dont quite get it. Even if the motives are true and genuine, still most tourist visas are usually denied in the Philippines. For some ungodly reason CO's don't run out of excuses rationalizing that ALL folks who come to see their sons and/or daughters arent coming back to their country of origin. Although there is a hint of truth there, a few others are still faithful doing it the legal way. So therefore the best way to come the United States is to utilize family-based immigration.

I think it's kind of stupid that they won't give them a tourist visa because they're afraid they'll immigrate...but they'll give them an immigrant visa. It's completely retarded. I don't doubt that some people from countries like Mexico and the Philippines immigrate because it's easier than getting a tourist visa.

There are plenty of reasons why folks migrate from our country to this country. But the very obvious reason is seeking for greener pastures. Like for instance a medical doctor in our country, earns annually probably a month's salary of a nurse here. These folks are highly educated indiviuals who qualify to immigrate anyway. Winner situation for uncle sam in economy and work force in healthcare industry. The very valuable asset of our country are the highlyl skilled/professional folks like architects,engineers,nurses,physicians etc... and they are being driven away. Patriotism is fine alright but hello which would you choose, Patriotism or food for the table???

We had our interview for my Adjustment of Status last August 30, 2006. And up to now I am still waiting for my green card. We did the fiancee visa.

I had a major problem though on how I used my name here after my husband and I got married.

In the Philippines when u get married there. Our surname becomes our middle name and our husband’s surname is our new surname.

So I followed that rule then when the guy was interviewing me, he told me that I should still use my maiden name when I was still single and choose if I will drop my dad’s surname and change it to my husband’s surname.

I said to him, Nope I don’t want to drop my dad’s surname so he then told me that I will need to use both. So my name is so long now. I already have 2 names as my first name then my middle name plus now 2 surnames.

He also told me though that I could change my name the way I wanted it to be after I get my citizenship, Hello it is still a long way to go since I arrived here as K1.

Anyone here who had a problem like that?? THANKS!!!

I have the same issue about middle names. Americanos always had middle names. And it's not the way we Pinoys do it. lol. And I'm glad you posted this issue because I thought dear husband is nuts...well obviously its DH and CO who are the nuts..lol just kidding.

I now understood what my hubby was trying to explain. I still feel bad about dropping my father's surname but not anymore that I read this. COnsidering that we did not have a personal appearance for AOS interview. Dear hubby is very well calibrated with Consulate officer's rule of thumb about middle name dropping, huh?cool!

I think the US should try out a points-based system; seems to work well for Canada and Australia...and they should target workers with skills that are necessary to the US economy. This will allow highly-qualified workers from around the world to come to the US to work. I would still favor a cap and quotas for this category, but I think it would make things easier for everyone.

I'm in favor of family-based immigration when it comes to spouses and minor children of both USCs and LPRs...I look less favorably on some of the other categories. I'm not prepared to actively push to ban those categories, but I won't be upset if they get rid of them either.

I agree with your idea about point-based system. Surely mother dear is an extremely highly skilled individual. But the thing about the US immigration in Manila, is they're pretty strict when it comes to tourist visa. Dont quite get it. Even if the motives are true and genuine, still most tourist visas are usually denied in the Philippines. For some ungodly reason CO's don't run out of excuses rationalizing that ALL folks who come to see their sons and/or daughters arent coming back to their country of origin. Although there is a hint of truth there, a few others are still faithful doing it the legal way. So therefore the best way to come the United States is to utilize family-based immigration.

Hi everyone,

I was wondering what the process is for me to get my parents and brother(unmarried over 25) a GC

I'm from Canada, Married a US born citizen. I just recieved my GC- do i have to wait until i get my US citizenship? or can my husband file for them?

Then it'll be grandma Josephine and grandpa Mark, followed by cousins Rita, Jay, Fernando, Lucca, Pete, Stephanie and Dave, with uncle Jedd, uncle Rob, aunt Fay and aunt Anne right behind them, etc.

Before your husband knows it, he'll have your whole family living in the backyard!

I just hope your husband knew he'd end up sponsoring your whole family beforehand.

IT'S THE COUPLE'S CHOICE, WHETHER THEY WILL SPONSOR THE WHOLE CLAN OR NOT. TO BE QUITE FRANK WITH YOU---IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS SIR.

Besides, you don't know the couple, do you? I'm positive it will be their best of interest to sponsor the brother and the mom/dad, not yours.

In our culture we treat elderlies with love and respect, and we do not deprive them from enjoying their last golden days. .

Hi everyone,

I was wondering what the process is for me to get my parents and brother(unmarried over 25) a GC

I'm from Canada, Married a US born citizen. I just recieved my GC- do i have to wait until i get my US citizenship? or can my husband file for them?

Thanks for your help.. good luck with your journeys:)

We share the same concern. I plan to do that also for my mom (a widow) and my big brother (single). I think they prioritize applications submitted by a US citizen. SO i figured I'll just have to wait till I get my citizenship.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF YOU WAS NOT ABLE TO FILE YOUR ADJUSTMENT OF STATUS AND YOUR K-1 EXPIRE ALREADY? YOU WILL BE DEPORTED? WHAT WILL HAPPEN? THANKS I WILL APPRECIATE YOUR REPLY

The K1 visa expires in 90 days. And even if you got married on the 90th day since it already satisfied the conditions that you should be married within 90 days then there's nothing to be worried about. We exhausted our 90 day period to get to know each other, learn for the very first time things I didnt know growing up from the Philippines. Coming from a different culture and background it's a MUST to be familiar and adjusted to the person and place where you will be staying for the rest of your life. I'm glad I did.

In our case we got married in Hawaii, it took 3 months after the wedding to get the marriage license and therefore no AOS application took place for 90 days. IT's not necessary for you to do the AOS right away, like us we waited for the marriage license to be mailed from Honolulu, HI. And it took 3 months, pretty long wait just for not getting married in the mainland. lol. Dont fret, you will not be deported.

God bless you.

So what happens after you send your AOS documents into the office and then in the meantime while you are waiting, your k1 visa expires, do they give you something to let you know that you can stay in the country?

The K1 visa expires in 90 days. And even if you got married on the 90th day since it already satisfied the conditions that you should be married within 90 days then there's nothing to be worried about. We exhausted our 90 day period to get to know each other, learn for the very first time things I didnt know growing up from the Philippines. Coming from a different culture and background it's a MUST to be familiar and adjusted to the person and place you will be staying for the rest of your life. I'm glad I did.

Good luck to you guys. God bless.[/b]

I am posting to update our situation. I flew over from Minnesota yesterday to be with my husband for the interview today. It took a little over 2 hours. Even with his 4 cautions for theft, 1 conviction for theft, 1 caution for fraud, and 1 caution for drunk and disorderly, he was APPROVED! I would like to note that the person that we handed all the paperwork to spent a long time looking over the UK police report and said "oh, they are just cautions"

I did have a short brief that Laurel Scott did for us, but they didn't even look at it.

All in all, a very pleasant morning!

congratulations

Hello everyone,

just thought I'd share the good news...woke up this morning to a beautiful email from USCIS...

My case was approved and my new card production was ordered yesterday!!!!

I went through Vermont, they received my petition on october, 5th 2006 and my extention letter was dated october, 18th. I was supposed to get my biometrics done back in november, but was only able to complete them at the end of march since I was in Europe from october, 3rd to march, 26th 2007.

I am applying for citizenship later on this year for the very next step! Although getting the 10 year GC pretty much make me feel as I am done.

Good luck to everyone who is still waiting for an approval, may it be as speedy as possible!!!

Have a nice day everyone! May it be one full of new approvals!!!!

whhoooaahhh! congratulations

They sent the welcome notice the 27th, we got it yesterday (the 30th) but I'm wondering how soon after the green card usually comes? (I'm already watching the mail like a hawk, but thought I might get a better time line here...and the people whose timelines I looked at had a two day lapse between the notice and green card production ordered so I'm not sure...)

Thank ya much!

During my time, I got it in 6 months. That includes everything start to finish. No more interview. Pretty cool! But then again each case varies.

We had our interview on Tuesday and my husband received the green card stamp in his passport! It wasn't bad at all, the interview was less than 20 minutes! So we are set for for the next 2 years and will enjoy the break from all of this government "madness"! Good luck to all of you in your journey...

Deb & Res

(L)

CONGRATULATIONS

The CO gave her a hard time maybe because you're not around in USembassy in manila?

I dont think that's the reason. Whether Doc May was there or not. During my time

beloved hubby wasnt there during my interview, I was so nervous then I finally talked to the CO. Goodness gracious it was super quick as if I was just putting my make up on. Im serious, it's that super quick. Our AOS was without an interview, i cant believe what's happening but I got my green card in 6 months. Praise be to GOD

DocMay,

I can see most of the VJers here are on AR. I understand the frustration, even we prepare all the documents they need according to their specification they still have job to do and double check or cross reference the papers we submitted. Let's just be more patience on dealing this.

As long as our intentions are good then there is nothing to be afraid of. Just pray more for His grace and guidance.

Kim Tung

I AGREE

the CO cannot deny a visa but recommend it be return back to the states for denial..and yes, the CO has the authority to request more info. the guidelines are clear on this

Hi,

im new here and trying to fish some new info as im getting nervous about my interview...

this post caught my eyes, and wondering over and over what could be the reason for putting you on AR, i looked on your page and noticed but wasn't sure, it was on your page you were married or what? but it says something like;

Ana is the "marrow of my bones" and the "light of my life."

Witnessed by Ana's family and friends, the Baptist Minister with joy

Pronounced us to be Husband and Wife for the rest of our lives

In the eyes of God, I see Ana as my beautiful Princess and my Wife,

With all my love to Ana Mae Pon of Gingoog City, Philippines for life.

Joe

i was just curious because im having my upcoming interview in a few weeks from now, and age gap could also be scrutinized about our case which i really hope not im crossing fingers and praying until i walk out the embassy with flying colors.. i hope

So it could be it?? I don't know, maybe this ceremony wasn't legal.

I think you will be just all right. USCIS just wanted to make sure both parties are safe. The Amerikano and the Filipina.

Americano immigration is highly structured for security reasons. And it applies literally to everything all across the board.

ADMINISTRATIVE REVIEW

Ana had her Interview today on April 10 at 7:30AM as the first victim: I personally documented months of chats, e-mails, financial support, phone logs, etc which took me a number of hours to gather and print with color bindings with color photos. The Officer at Window #27, a black man, kept for review. He only asked to keep copies of my prior divorces and Affidavid of support. Ana was devastated at receiving the white slip.

Ana asked why A.R. but he would not say anything but he needed to review the documents. Personally, I think that he was jealous of my wages and assets. Maybe he was looking out for my best interests. He just looked at the document and said "FRAUD," which Ana did not understand the meaning. There is a large age gap between us, I am rather financial well off compared to some people, and Ana wanted a Prenuptial to prove to everyone that she was not marrying for money. HOW CAN THERE BE FRAUD? I had to laugh at Prenuptial Agreements, which are really worthless in the USA.

The black Officer at window #27 just told her that she would hear from the Embassy in two weeks. He did NOT return her passport and did NOT ask her to pay for the Delbros. Wondering is he plans to have another Interview or how will Ana get her passport returned to her? Anyone know how an Officer could allege FRAUD in a five minute Interview?

08/11/06 - Sent mail I-129F to CSC

08/18/06 - Receive NOA1

10/24/06 – Received crazy RFE of having filed multiple visa: LIAR.

11/02/06 - Returned RFE Refused to answer their silly questions: Approve or deny with threats to sue.

11/15/06 - NOA2 Approved, but CSC thought I was fooling: HaHa

LIARS - NVC received

LIARS - NVC sent case to the consulate MNL2006845138 (I am not paranoid about my number)

12/12/06 - Manila received the case? NOTE: NVC and two groups in Embassy do not know???

02/26/07 - Received Packet 4

04/03/07 - Medical

04/10/07 – Interview = A.R.

Most folks do not know me, but look up my name on Federal Reporter, where I have sued the Government. I have done this than most people know just for fun and test cases. I hate to do this as very time consuming. But, maybe there is a good reason for the AR by the Officer at Window #27. Or, maybe this was payback for my past irritations: :whistle:LOL

DocMay also known as Joseph A. May: Look me up Immigrations!

I think it's for the best interest of you two. A friend of mine got into this ordeal too. And the AR is in 6 weeks, He's already got her a plane ticket, too bad she wont be here in time because of that new regulation. I think Southeast Asia happens to be high in fraudulent cases.

Just relax sir. Everything happens for a reason.

God bless you all.

Hey fellow vjers my fionce just had her visa interview on the 2nd in mumbai. It was the 1st over here in america and the interview went well they only asked a few questions and they said you have been approved and your passport will come via courier. I was all excited at first, untill the next morning, i called the dept. of state and asked them for the status of my case. They said that its possible they need to run fingerprint checks with the fbi and it could take a while. has anybody ever heard of anythign like this. I am going into depression. NEED HELP

YOu don't have any reason to panic. US embassy will notify you by mail if they need something more. I noticed that during our immigration application galore, my husband got exactly the same document that I got. So i figured they definitely send the petitioner a documentation. Just relax.