No_one

@ Darnell, Im in California.:-)

@ NigeriaorBust ,and who said I want to date?It would be best sometimes to think before you have those fingers typing.Just sayin.

She can go to Hotel Soriente ,they have a computer there and they print.its just a block away from SLMC where she will have her medical exam.Make sure she has the right photos before she enters SLMC.Goodluck!

Just wonderin...Im separated and it would be nice to know someone of the same situation.A filipina here in states,37 yrs old.Let me know if youre interested :-)

Be sure you get that CFO certificate stamped on your passport or you wont be able to board your plane out of the Phils.

Kudos!wish you all the best!

That must be so hard on you because you have reached the point where hes hurting you physically.You have to leave that man.Iam in the same situation as yours but i think mine is worst although he doesnt hurt me physically its still kinda like it everytime I discover that hes going out with other women each time im at work.

Be strong.And do whats best for yourself.This man doesnt care about you at all.Im leaving my husband pretty soon and i cant wait to do that.

Its sad that these things has happened to you but look on the brighter side AT LEAST YOU ARE NOT MARRIED TO HER.They are right when they said:

1. Dont see her anymore (just curious ,have you ever spend time with her when she "arrived" here in the States?)

2. Inform the authorities that are in charge with immigration matters.

3. If you communicate with her on email or phone have it all documented.

She thinks that she outsmarted you but she didnt.Shes only good here for 90 days and after that shed be in real trouble.I really feel for you but be strong things happen for a reason.She chose the path where she is right now so thats her call.Be happy that she has set you free for the supposed long time misery if she could have stayed with you with no love at all.Take care of yourself,no one could love you better but YOU.

I am so sorry this happen to you. It is true not all american man is like that. My wife is filipina and I love her so much. I would NEVER, NEVER, do anything like that to hurt my asawa. You deserve so much better than that man. I truly wish you the best and your friends here in VisaJourney are here to listen to you and help with your decision...

Thomas & Cleofe

So am I.You got that right.Not all people are like that.Thats what i understand about

Loving someone ,when you love someone so much and invested a lot in them you would never do a thing that would hurt her/him and risk the relationship.thanks a lot!Wish you both the best also.

I would leave him girl... even if he was on a "business trip", he should have told you. Any man that is going to remind you constantly about the money he spends on you is not worth the time. I know some women whose husbands count every penny used out of their pocket and try to make them feel guilty for even the food they buy for the groceries! This man is totally not worth it.

Even worse, he cheats on you and shows no remorse. It has been going on this long and he doesn't seem to care so I would apply for a divorce ASAP and use one of the options listed by Cino. Then start over with your life and find a man who deserves you and treats you as you should be treated!

Thanks for this!

i would divorce him first, and with the proof you have that he cheated i would make sure he pays alimony for the rest of his miserable life!

then i agree with what Cino said. but divorce him first!

good luck!

You really made me laugh.Ill be fine without his alimony.I just want him to be happy also,thanks for taking your time.

If you have your 10 year GC already, then I guess there is no rush for you to divorce. Do it when you are emotionally ready to do it. GOod luck. I wish you the best.

Thanks a lot! It makes me feel better just bein here with you guys.

There are 2 ways you can guide yourself, the way you choose is all up to you, you have to decide.

1- Get divorced & go back to your old country & start a new life. You don't have to do anything when you don't apply for ROC on time, your permanent residency will be automatically revoked.

2- Get divorced & as soon as you get a divorce decree apply ROC with a waiver. You can stay in US & get the permanent GC by proving your marriage was originally entered in a good faith but did not work later on.

Good luck on your decision !... please keep us posted.

Been married for almost 4 years when i got here in the States so i got my 10 yr GC a few weeks after i arrived here.do i need to do more regarding the GC?thank you so much.

aw sad to hear that .. hard to find good guys this days .. they are one in a million, maybe move on ?? there are lots of guys out there that can treat you right (I'm pretty sure of that). We can't called it marriage anymore 'coz of how he treated you.., if you don't care about your GC anymore or being there..,I think for me (since I'm filipina too) you can go back here in philippines, find a good job to make you busy and start a new life without him., I mean surely you can start a new life without him.. and yeah I agree with RICKJOVI that not all Americans are like that surely in right time you'll find "the good guy" for you, who deserve you I'm sorry sis .. I feel for you .. (cheater will always be a cheater --> I AGREE DEFINITELY)

I dont care really about the greencard.I cared about him thats why im here but the GC will make my stay here legit.So i need it.I cant just go back to Phils and cry about what happen.I have to be strong not just for me but for my kids.I was prepared by my husband for almost 6 years for the life here in the States.If he has wasted the relationship i cant just simply throw it all away.So its best i think that i stay here and work and get myself busy.Started workin a month after i got here.thanks for sharing your thoughts.

He can't deport you, but to remove your conditions once you are divorce, if you choose to go that route, you will have to prove that you married in good faith;, i.e., picutres of your wedding, statements from friends that obseved you as a married couple, bills with both your names on it, etc.... THe evidence you found in his e-amil will not be admissable as it was obtained illegally and he can actually sue you for invasion of his privacy. A case like that is goin gon i the state of Michigan. I feel for you, you deserve better, but gather what ever legal evidence you can obtain and the documents that you need to prove a marriage of good faith. From what I understand, once you are divorced and have the paperwork in hand, you should be able to submit a waiver for ROC and then you may be able tto get your 10 year GC. Good luck. People like him cause good people like me to look bad. Remember all Americans are not like him, as with Filipinas, all are not good also. Each has good and bad it is just a matter of finding the good ones with the right intentions. I was hurt by a Filipina who used me for her GC and I obtained pictures of her with another man while we were still married. Less than 3 weeks of leaving me. I found another Filipina from a personal reference and I am so much ahppier now. We are waiting for our K1 petition to be approved by hopefully the end of April. Take care and God Bless.

I already have my GC a few weeks after i got here in the States.We have been married for almost 4 years when i got here.I dont need to divorce him for i wont be getting into anymore relationship anyway.This relationship has burnt me.I thought he was the perfect guy but i was so wrong.

I know that there are so many good people out there.Thank you for your time.really appreciate it.

I feel so sorry about this is happening to you, and to your marriage. I don't understand why people spending money, time and effort if his or her is not serious about the commitment.

if i am in your shoes i will definitely leave my husband. His not only hurting you but also suffering all his stupid doin. I cant stand seeing people hurting because of irresponsible partner and immorality.

I know you can get alot of advice here from visajourney members. i am sorry i cant help you and give you advice about your marriage:-(

Just take care yourself always. i am also a filipina, i want you to be happy.

Good bless you and guide you always.

Anne

Thats what i dont understand.He has spent too much on our relationship.He has put me through school again with a nursing degree before i got here.thanks for droppin by on my case

Arrived here in the States over 2 months ago.My husband went to the Phils last February to bring me here.The first time I saw him again at the airport he looks different,a look that hasnt been on a long flight.That made me suspicious.To my knowledge that time he was only there for 2 days until I saw his passport when we were in the States already.He was there in the Phils for a week without me knowing it.I confronted him and he said he was there on a business trip.Answered him back that "why would you be there for a week without me knowing it and he replied it doesnt matter because you were not responsible for the expense.I paid everything for it.And he told me "You cant put me on the stand here coz i ran this show".Out of self pity and being a stranger to this country i just cried and got rid of the arguement.Each arguement he would always tell me the amount that he has spent on me. And that he had clothe me and etc.

To go straight to the point ,I got through his email and there i discovered that he had planned the trip to meet a woman in the Philippines and at the same time bring me here to the States.I found and saved all the evidences of his affair including pictures of them together,his tickets and the copy of his passport.I also found out that he has an account that has all the women's names there.But he has spent sometime with this particular woman in the province of visayas.this woman works at a prestigious computer company as a call center agent.she sent my husband photos of her with and without clothes.Sweet emails.Emails that tells that theres sometime goin on aside from the sexual thing.Anyway,i sent the photo of the woman that has the frontal nudity at her work email using my email and told her in a very calm way and i wrote it this way "if you really love my husband and if he thinks he loves you also why dont you convince him to divorce me?When the woman received my email she told me husband through text i guess that i sent an "inappropriate email to her work" so my husband confronted me and told me that she can sue me and the company where she works for(its US company domiciled in the Phils).Got so insulted so i answered him back which made him so angry and i said "Inappropriate email?if that was inappropriate why would she send a naked photo to a married man and be with a married man?No company will get into personal affairs esp when their employee is involved in an extra marital affairs.He was so mad he told me he would deport me ,that was before i got my GC.I told him i will go home if you want to but you cant deport me because i came here legally.We had a huge fight that time and every now and then.I know and I feel that they are still communicating.I want to leave the marriage coz iam not happy anymore.He is a womanizer.I caught him several times while we were still dating but i gave it a chance thinking he would change but i guess the saying is true that a cheater will always be a cheater.Please help me with your words.

Ours was bookbinded.Everything was there including the photos.People at the embassy were awed of the very detailed information.

just an update, my ex filed a divorce and they said the processing is 6-8 weeks the the divorce decree will be sent to us. But the 90days window to adjust my status starts on April 1,2011 because my GC expires on June 28,2011. Should I wait for the divorve decree to file the ROC? Someone advised me to get a ROC with a waiver, I don't know where to get the divorce waiver, or is that the same as the divorce decree? I wanna start to do it on April 1 but I don't know where to start. Please help me.

Hi Maybelle!are you still here in vj?Im afraid im going through a situation similar to yours with your first husband.And funny the girl is also from Cebu and she knows that my husband is married.I will share my story in a bit so some people here with good heart can help me through this.I just got here in the states last month using the IR1 visa.Looking forward to hearing from you and the people here.

Regards,

Lia

Its not your loss ,its his.I know and I understand because I feel pain also being in this relationship that I have right now.At least you ar out of it already,physically.Iwill share my story in another topic.Grieve then let it go.There's more to life.