
NoWayBack
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Posts posted by NoWayBack
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No one here has offered you sympathy, only how to get out of a bad situation. If that's not what you want to hear, then don't waste everyone's time with bad mouthing other people's advice. You can't make up your mind, you called her a psycho and a fraud in your posts and now you don't know if you love her. You tell us a sob story but you were a party to fraud and someone should have told you never to lie, least of all to the USCIS. You have never said what happened, only that you're a victim. The assumption people have made is that you're insensitive dolt and so far you've proven that to be true....thank you
Obviously you don't really read what am saying and just trying to make me the liar , your very defensive for some reason which i don't know what and obviously you don't see your self like someone who likes to attack , as i mentioned before i said i think she is a psycho , i never confirmed that she was psycho , and before she does that to me yeah i loved her more than anyone could ever imagine so really you need to just stop trying to twist everything and being so defensive and i think thats because of something in your past ...and who said that we lied to the USCIS , she was a fraud of something else entirly ...nothing that involves me....and 1 last thing , if you would want a proof of me telling the truth , you would never get one because of your way of talking...Thanks
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Being a father entails more than being a sperm donor.
Clearly, if your wife does not want you to be in her child's life, does not want you to be his father, and you live 8,000 (or so) miles away on a foreign continent in a completely different culture and for all practical purposes world and have no way of traveling to America, or even make contact with the child who may or may not move many times until he's grown up enough to realize that whatever his mom told him why his dad isn't in his life must be the way it is, then you got handed a very bad set of cards. You can spend silly money in trying to interfere with your wife's plans, or you can accept the message Allah has sent you and move on with your life.
Perhaps getting some distance from this maybe a good first step.
Thank you a lot and i have already accepted the message of Allah.
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This is what I thought. If you have emails where she discussed this with you as proof and you didn't stop it and allowed it to go on makes you an accomplice and guilty of fraud too. If you try to get even with her and send this proof in to get her in trouble than you will also get in trouble. More than likely you will get a permanent ban for life.
You don't have a lot of options here. To gain joint custody you will have to get a lawyer. The courts will want to see proof you are indeed the father. You will need to go through the courts where she resides. This costs a lot of money. There is no international courts you can go to for custody hearings. You can go through your courts there but it is useless unless she travels back there to enforce anything your courts will rule on.
Well am sorry to tell you tat your wrong there...first of all i know it and telling them would be trying to stop her ALSO i have no word on her because she is a free woman and am not the law so its not my place to allow it or not ....and lemme tell you something ...am not worried about the premanent ban or anything except for my child but if i live with my child , i don't really need the US in anything.
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If you aren't happy with the advice given then don't get upset when someone asks you a few, very logical questions. Investigation requires careful examination of the evidence, maybe if you had done some investigation of your own, then you wouldn't be in this jam in the first place. You say that she's a psycho, etc., then why would you believe anything that she says? Just because she had a test that proved that she was pregnant doesn't mean that it's your kid. An HCG test is not the same as a DNA test. Not even close. Wake up and smell the coffee and don't waste everyone's time with your rude and obnoxious comments, maybe that's the real reason why this "really stand by woman" doesn't want you around the kid. You say she was with you for 3 months. How do you know she wasn't sleeping with anyone else at that time ? She showed you the baby on cam , but considering how many times you said she committed fraud, what makes you believe that this is your child ? According to you, you married someone you didn't know very well, someone you describe as not being very sexy and then suddenly you are upset when she does this. Seriously, you expect sympathy ?
Well, No one is perfect and you wouldn't investigate someone you didn't doubt in so much and you loved and i never said i was sure she was a psycho , i said i think she is one , My wife was staying in my house so i know for sure that its my son , she doesn't know anyone here but me and my family and there is no males except my father and the whole family was always home , i aint that dumb , so you wake up and stop being so attacking in your way of talking , it will get you no good and if you feed your time is wasted then you shouldn't be posting here, and your wife might not be sexy her self or your husband , that doesn't mean you don't love him/her , and you don't know me well and don't know how iam with her or with her kids , so you don't need to make assumptions ..thank you...n btw i don't need your sympathy
Look, let's be reasonable about this. Until you get a DNA test then you know nothing about this woman or the kid. Have you considered that? Scandal gave you great advice, I'd follow it. If you have some way to PROVE it's your kid, then things change. How are you going to get that proof?
Well , that would be just to prove to my self that am the father but im sure than iam the father so i have np with that but if your talking about the legal side , well my name is on his BC , so i have np with that.
Habitual residence issues attach, however the father could still make a petition either to be allowed into the US on humanitarian grounds. It is pretty dicey, though, it depends on why he was refused admission.
How could i do that ?
He can't get a visitor visa, that's the problem. if he can prove that the child is his, then he might be able to get a visa.
What visa would i get if i could prove that he is my child ?
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I am so sorry. I hope you can find some solutions.
I will inshallah.....I just will my son will grow up fast and hit 18 so he can find out for him self what she did and who should he be with...i really just wants to hold my child for once...i really miss him...he is so beautiful
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I don't know how to help you with this, but at least you can look at this site to get an idea of people facing situations somewhat like yours. My link
It is such a difficult thing because Egypt didn't sign the Hague Convention. I am sure that she is afraid that you would do the same thing that she is doing now. There is obviously a lack of trust in your relationship. If she's not being level-headed, you have to be.
I really just did everything i could for her....i mean it...everything...the most little to the biggest....even when she was craving mangos when she was preg...i made sure that i had many mangos in the fridge so she would eat all she wants when she come...imagine that....
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i believe the man told you wrong my sister is married to an Egyptian even her husband said your from the USA all you have to do is shout and the officer will arrest me not you USA persons married to Egyptian or not have more power then Egyptian in Egypt..her marriage contract also does not have that in it.....why would anyone agree to a marraige contract that has that? I'm Muslim and i would never agree to that
just my opinion
sara
Well, am sorry but your wrong there and he gave her a false info or not complete...i will tell you how it works....she has more right and power in 1 case only ...if she had a problem with someone in the street but not her HUSBAND ....if with her husband...she really can't do anything....but with any other person..she can screw him.
she should be honest with her husband with out honesty and trust what kind of marriage is it?
just my opinon
sara
Your right there
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yes but with the Kitab in the country it changes things... I am assuming she has become part of his family book etc. Us marriage is different then a Marriage in egypt (Us marriage alone actually isnt even recognized in egypt when it is with an egyptian man/woman) this is why in the ME you see alot of men marrying someone in the US and then marrying someone else in their home country with no problems...Unless you have our kitab/legal marriage in THAT country
Marrying at the Ministry of justice is the same as marrying by Maazon...my wife is american and my brothers wife is egyptian...he went and got a family background check for the army...then it was listed there that i was married...so trust me...your giving out a lot of wrong info..please stop it..and btw i live in Egypt and am muslim
So, it was written into your marriage contract that you were not free to travel? Is that what you're saying because mine says nothing of it.
Whatever.
What matters here is that you insist her husband can detain her. Color me silly, but I wouldn't take legal advice from a translator. I would, and have, listened carefully to every bit of advice the U.S. Embassy in Cairo had to offer.
SHE IS FREE TO LEAVE.
She is free to leave UNLESS he goes to the airport police or the place where he makes his passport and report that he doesn't want her to leave....
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Seriously... tell her not to tell him until she gets back here...she can get here and like a few weeks later call him up OMG 7abibi im pregnant blah blah...play it arab style tell him she doesnt feel well etc. she needs help yada yada....dont do it before you leave... its too much of a risk... because baby or not if she is his wife, legally in egypt (or islamically in that matter) he can call the airport and she cannot leave...embassy or no embassy they cant do anything for you...and im not some crazy american person with some type of Bias...I am Arab muslim etc. trust me it can happen, the rights of a man in a ME country are endless, and when his baby is involved its even worse
So she can take his child and run and use the baby as a weapon...come here or your not seeing your baby...really....your just saying that because you are a woman not more and your info is wrong ...actually if they got married in the US , he wont be able to do anything but if they got married here he will...so just stop being selfish and sexiest ...you don't know her or him...she might be a scared bad woman or a scared good woman....dunno....but u must put everything in mind ...
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You shoulda have figured it out ..its so simple...she would have the baby here and we would be applying for DCF together and would go back together ....well she would be a good person lol....but obviously she left because she is bad...what kinda question or what are u trying to get to ?
".anyone want to ask about anything..feel free to ask it.."
This is what you wrote. I asked you a question. Your post was ambiguous - it wasn't clear what you meant to say and you can't expect people to read your mind. I wanted to know how you would answer my question. No need to get abrasive and mean. I understand that you are angry about the situation, but it was unclear really why she left, especially when you said she knew you were going to leave her. If I was in another country, pregnant, and my husband planned on leaving me, sure I would get out of there quickly to a safe place for myself. Obviously there are a lot of dynamics going on here. I am sorry things aren't working out for you. That is a very tough situation to be in and I think you might need to contact some government authorities who can advise you on what to do.
I really didn't mean to be mean....it just seemed like many posters were doubting in me and attacking me but am srry if i sounded like that...well i never planned to leave her.....i just know how she thinks ...she knew she was doing a very bad things with me....so she knew what would the concequences be specially because am a straight guy ....so she knew i wouldn't afford that forever....but i never..not once told her that i was gonna leave or thought about it...she had always told me if i have someone else and doubted that am with someone else but i never betrayed her and never had anyone else...but she punished me by her mistake...she was doing the bad things and scaring her self and left me ...damn...i really think she is a psycho
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Is your name on the birth certificate?
If she's not seeking any child support from you, don't sweat anything. When and if she comes after you for child support then you can go about getting yourself some custody/visitation rights. In 18 years when the child is of age, they'll seek you out. What goes around comes around and she'll get hers in the end. SOME women use children as a weapon against fathers. They're the ultimate weapon to use against us, as the women who resort to this tactic don't have a motherly instinct or decent bone in their body. Father's who had the misfortune of breeding with this type of ilk have two options: simply walk away or fight for your rights with every available tool and asset at your disposal and still in a good majority of the cases you may not end up gaining anything and then you'll resort to option 1.
Thanks a lot for your advice but i wouldn't use option one that easy, i have to do everything to be with my child so i wouldn't be unfairing him...am his father and its my responsiblity and i wouldn't leave him live with a cruel stone hearted woman like that...i don't know how will she raise him or what will happen to his future ...he is a peice of me ...
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my memory might be really off today.......but wasn't there someone that came on here not to long ago that was asking questions about being pregnant and afraid to stay in Egypt because she thought the husband could refuse to allow her to leave Egypt?
could that be related to this?
sara
Well....am the Egyptian side and i would help her if you can give me the link to her topic...thanks
Yes, I looked that up, but it seemed the timing was a little different, and they had actually been living in the U.S. together, and went to Egypt for a visit and he wanted to stay there.
What Topic is that...i can really assure her that he can't do anything if the child has a US passport...gimme a link to the topic and i will help her.
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What documents were fraudulent and how were they fraudulent?
She made a US passports for her children ( my step children ) without their fathers permission , she frauded the consent letter and sent it in...and she was frauding documents to send it to her school because her and her daughter ( my step daughter ) have same first and last name ..except that her daughter has a maiden name ....so they were always playing around that...and i have the chat between me and her after she went there on how she sat up her ex husband and how stupid i was not to think of that.....i can screw her ###### life.
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I agree with this, Nagi. There must be more to this story.
To the OP: I can't give you any advice about how to get your rights as a father. It will be very difficult for you to do unless the child's mother wants to cooperate. That I know from my own experience. I too am a father in one country (US) with children in another country (Brazil). They live there with their mother. We have a divorce agreement from yet a third country which spells out my visitation rights, and rights to access via Skype, email, phone etc. She flaunts that agreement and has never respected it in 3 years since the divorce and they moved to her home country. Like you, I would need to hire lawyers to adjudicate the divorce agreement in Brazil and have it enforced by the local courts. All of this takes considerable time and money. There is really no other way in such an international disputed custody situation. Your situation is different in that you are not divorced and don't have any legal agreement to enforce, and in fact are not even sure the child is yours.
Good luck.
I thought about that. Maybe. Or maybe not.
I just answered nagi...read the posts i made...thanks for the advice...but i can't go to the US to hire a lawyer and enfore it...got it.
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If she treated you that badly then you should not have stayed with her. You should have not slept with her. You could not have been that blind. If your family saw something, then why did you not see it. You need to see a lawyer, pronto! Divorce her and fight for custody. Age isn't the issue. Maybe she's psycho, how well do you really know her?
Finally someone posted fairly , I will answer all your questions , my wife is this kind of woman whom does the bad thing n really cry hard to show how sorry she was for what she did and that she never meant it , i found out later that she was acting just to get her way or manipulate me .... my family was thinking with their mind more than their heart and i wont lie to you ..i thought more by my heart...so my family was wondering why would some woman in her age want to marry someone in my age? and why would she leave her kids to come here...and why didn't she want to have birth control when i and her talked about it...so basically they seen it as she just wanted to get pregnant to hold me to her....i seen it as in she wants to have a baby with someone she loves...so it was not bad...am not in the US to see a lawyer , and if i had a visa i would go there and fight it ...but am here and she is there and thats what she is using ...if i divorced her i will have no way to be with my child unless if am there....and as in for the psycho part...well ..she was to a therapy for 3 years...she never wanted to talk about it and when i ever started to ...she got mad and started destroying things.....you never know people well until your in a kinda situation
What if she had stayed to have the baby there? What would have happened then?
You shoulda have figured it out ..its so simple...she would have the baby here and we would be applying for DCF together and would go back together ....well she would be a good person lol....but obviously she left because she is bad...what kinda question or what are u trying to get to ?
Sounds like now someone is starving for attention created account to amuse themselves.
Sounds like some people needs to work sometime and don't have time to stay infront of the pc to answer every post 24 houres...and Obviously there are some other people that can't live without trying to make other people bad some how even tho they aren't...but they just try to fullfill their desire ....
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Something doesn't add up. Have you been able to determine you are the biological father ? Have you had a DNA test to make sure ? Why wouldn't she show you the baby on cam ? Is there some reason why she would want to hold on to you ? Are you that special ? There is something missing from this equation because none of this makes sense.
She has stayed with me for 3 months , so yeah am sure am the father.she had the HCG test before she leave ....she wouldn't show me the boy on cam because of her obsession with controling when she feels like she can't control me , and as in for if am that special , well i can't answer that , you must know me your self so you can decide that and as in why she feels less or she could be left because of her bad actions , well she aint sexy but i married her because she was a really stand by woman and was kind but i didn't know her well till later....if you have any more doubt in me...i have no problem to answer all of your questions , and if your here to investigate and not help , then your not in the right topic...thanks for coming by
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This part bother me: "she knew eventually i was gonna leave her...so she basically came here to get pregnant so she could always keep me with her since we had a child together..." You basically admit that you were with her for fraudulent reasons... Maybe it's the English barrier but honestly without help I really don't know what you can do. Unfortunately it would require money.
Yea, she was playing head games and was being nasty so she knew i was gonna leave her if she continued doing it .... so she wanted to control me ...got it now...so please next time don't accuse people of bad things when you know nothing about them..thanks
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If you can't afford an American lawyer, then you need to contact your government.
Where to go , which department, which ministry , trust me i have asked and went to many places, they basically told me , get your child from her by her agreement or you wont see him again until you have a visa or an international lawyer....i really can't afford one..and my governmet can't even cover their own because of the revolution ...so trust me i have no chance here except if she was here and we went to the court...nothing more ..nothing less.
how long did ya'll know each other before ya'll got married?
you were 20/21 when that happen?
where did ya'll get married?
a year or so before we get married.
we got married in Egypt
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I would really help you if i was in the US but i really am not and i don't know how things work there, All i can do is pray for you .
Thank you a lot for offering the help ...I appreciate it....i don't know WHY ...How did she think she was gonna keep me this way , i will simply divorce her if there is no way i could be with my child .
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The police cannot do anything. You need an American family lawyer to fight for custody of your child.
That would cost me a leg and arm and i don't really have it and don't forget that currncy difference...1 dollar is for 6 L.E
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Sorry about your situation.
Contact your government and ask for help.
Find a family lawyer in the US and sue for custody of your son.
I live in Egypt..i have asked a lawyer about that...he said she is under the US law now and i have to be there if i wants to do something like that....and i don't have family in the US ....she is the only one that i knew and trusted....i really am sorry i ever loved or trusted her...i will always be sorry for that...i don't know if i called the police...would the police be able to get him to me or anything like that or what
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By the way ,I found out that i was denied because my wife gave me a frauded documents, and i know about things she frauded and i can get her arrested for.....i don't want to call the police and do that to her...and i don't want her to go to prison and my child to a faster care and then know nothing about him....i really need help...i don't know what to do...i never got to hold my child...please help me .
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Hello VJ
I don't know where to start but anyways this is my first time to post on VJ ..My wife( US citizen) and i have been married for 2 years now , she applied for immigration visa for me CR-1 and the case was sent back , anyways , my wife came here after then and stayed around 3 months with me then went back to the US when she was pregnant with my son, then she promised me that she were gonna deliver in my country so we both can see our child , then days passed and passed and she kept saying she had problems and i knew all that was excuses then finally i booked her a flight and then i found out that she never went to the airport and she told me that she couldn't make it in time ...anyways i knew it ...and it was the most depressing thing i had in my life ...then my wife just delivered there and i didn't get to see my son ...i applied for a tourist visa ...and got denied ...then my wife wouldn't open the cam for me for days and days then show me my son once then make me wait more days....till today ...she decided that i can't see my son anymore and hung up the cam on me and i did that to my self..well you all would be wondering what made her do that...well...am 23 and my wife is 40...my wife had put all her family above me and always put me down...she knew eventually i was gonna leave her...so she basically came here to get pregnant so she could always keep me with her since we had a child together...my family told me that but i didn't believe them and i trusted her...she came here to stay 6 months so we could apply by DCF but then she told me she had to leave as soon as she knew she was preg...i told her to take the pregnancy test and she wouldn't till i finally got her to do it and she was preg...she said CPS were gonna take her children and so on ....also her daughter was over 21 so basically she had np and nothing to worry about....anyways....now i can't see my son and i don't know what to do....anyone want to ask about anything..feel free to ask it..
Like Crazy
in Off Topic
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AWESOME...i MUST find it..Thanks for sharing