jaystone

congrats !!!

Hello Everyone,

After filing in late June, my fiancee had her interview yesterday and she was approved!! I want to thank everyone here at VJ! I have been a follower on this site for almost two years and all the information here was a HUGE help getting us through the visa process. We filed a K1 fiance visa and it has been one heck of a journey. The plan is to have her here by either December 22 or the 2nd week of January.

Thanks again!!

Jaystone

Have you thought about moving to San Francisco?

I did think about it, Laser1, but right now the cost of living is too high right now for me.

I appreciate the thought!

Jaystone

I believe you have to do the K2 within a year, seems I have read that a few times. Clock is ticking.

That is the plan. We hope to have her here by the fall of 2013.

Jaystone

I see. So two things going on, but one of them is definitely them being bigots about people from other countries. One bit of advice: never let them put you on the defensive and try to justify your relationship with another because ultimately it is nobody's business.

You can tell them "this is what I am doing." That's the end of it. Whenever someone tries to get you to justify, you can't win with them because there will be another attack, and another, and another, and another. You end that cycle by either not responding or asking them to explain who made them the Queen. What right do they have to make you justify who you are with.

Never be surprised how insane bigotry, jealousy, and envy can be. We actually had malicious internet stalkers make complaints not only to USCIS, but various government agencies, posing themselves as "protecting" my child bride against me, sold by her parents against her will. Just insane, delusional stuff. See how they are posing as "helping" you? This is called playing the servant role in manipulative literature: causing harm to you but under the pretense of helping.

So you distance yourself from them, as you have done, but leave the door open for them being reasonable. There cannot be anything more important than your wife, and you must not let them ever come between you.

I did have one friend and business associate that was completely out of his mind about this until the day he met her. Then suddenly she was a beautiful, charming young lady because he was no longer operating under this weird racist view. It started with him saying I had "given up". I was baffled by what he meant and I kept asking him to say ####### he meant by "giving up". I had selected the most beautiful girl on earth and was on cloud 9, so I had no idea what he meant. After a long, bizarre argument it finally dawned on me - she wasn't white. He just couldn't bring himself to say that.

You defeat that kind of racism by just doing it and going about your business. Once I brought her by, in under one minute it was over.

Thanks for all the advice..I really appreciate it! I am just going just what you suggest! One thing I found about myself in all this is that I was worried about what everybody else would think. Not any more! It is on my family on whether or not they accept her, not me. I am going to enjoy my life with my soon-to-be wife to the fullest and if they ever come around, it will be great. If not, is their loss!

Jaystone

Did you list the daughter on your petition for K2?

Sorry for the delay in getting back to you, Hank...yes I did do a K2

Jaystone

I would like to thank everyone for thier input...I really appreciate it!

I will be the first to admit I made a lot of mistakes with this whole situation:

I should have told the family earlier. In my previous relationships and marriage...everyone told me the person I was with was wrong for me and they were ultimately right. I was very nervous on how they would react to me having a relationship with a filipina. I did tell everyone about her after my first trip and it went very badly, and everytime I would bring up the subject it would end up with an argument...so I stopped talking about it. I was tired of fighting and every argument would become worse. As a matter of fact, the last argument ended up with everyone giving me an "intervention"...saying I needed therapy!!! I was livid!! They acted as though I was a drug addict!! My brother actually told me in so many words I could not see his kids again unless I saw a therapist!! Oh my God.....I realize they are in their own way trying to look out for me, but they are really going about it the wrong way. We seemed to be getting along better when I did not talk about it, so for the sake of getting along I stopped talking abut it...I knew I would have to bring it up and they knew a year ago she was coming to the US this year so I hoped over time at least they would be willing to meet her. Not the case. It is still pretty obvious they have an issue with my marrying someone outside the country.

I really messed up with the kids. I have apologized to my brother and his wife over this I don't think they ever got over it. I am not a parent, but I still should have known better..sometimes when I am every happy or excited,logic goes out te window and I was so excited about my fiancee! I had not been this happy in years...if they do wish to forgive me, fine. But my thing is...don't villainize my fiancee for my mistakes, and I believe that is what happened. Fortunately, I am still involved with the kids and I will continue to be in thier lives. Also it is also obvious to me they have an issue with my fiancee being from another country.

I realize now I cannot force them to meet her and get to know her, so I am not going to try....I already let them know she is coming and my door will always be open if they ever wish to visit. I will let them know when the wedding is, and if the wish to come, great, if not, that is on them. Until they accept her, I will not be involved in any more family functions...if she is not welcomed, neither am I. Fortunately, some of my family are happy for me so I will still be involved with them. My father was finally warming up to my fiancee but unfortunately he died before he got a chance to meet her....but my mom and one of my sisters are happy so I glad for that. Going forward, I am just going to concentrate on my immediate family...my fiancee also has a daugther but she will not be here for another year, so my focus going forward will be making things great for us and be involved with people who are happy for us. It is also a big plus she has a sister with her own family in California so that is a huge plus. When other family members are ready to finally ready to meet her, we will welcome them with open arms.

I want to thank everyone who gave me thier thoughts and suggestions....it has helped me get through this and I appreciate it! Wish us luck! Mira's interview is November 28th!

Jaystone

Hello Everyone,

I need some advice....I have been with my fiancee for two years and God Willing, she should be here by Christmas. Her embassy interview is next week. However, most of my family is not too keen on meeting her or wanting anything to her..some of it my own fault which I have been trying to fix.

After my first trip to meet my girl in January 2011...I came home and showed pictures of my trip to my brother, his wife and his three daughters...but, unknown to the parents, I asked the girls not to tell anyone that I was engaged.....the parents found out and they were livid!! They teach thier kids not to have secrets..and I had them talk to my girl on the phone....they were even more upset about that...they made it seem I was introducing them to a seriel killer! But never being a parent, I guess I did not know better...I have apologized and I thought they got over it....I don't think they have gotten over it..I have not mentioned her to anyone until now. What makes this even worse...is my family is dying out and there aren't many of us left...It is just my two older sisters, three younger brothers, a few cousins and three nieces...My mother and sisters and cousins are cool wit my engagement, but the rest are not....as a matter of fact, my brother in law said he felt pity for me....I was never so mad in my life! Anyway, it has been almost a year since I mentioned my fiancee to anyone, and everything seemed okay...last night I told the family she was coming next month, and to at least meet her before making any judgements, and for the most part the responded by saying don't expect us to meet her anytime soon...

I am at a loss....are family is dying out as it is and I am trying to hold things together, My fiancee will be isolated enough with just leaving her family to be with me....she is aware of the situation and still wants be with me no matter what...."us against the world". But I know it going to be tough....I will feel comfortable, being able to vist most of the family but being able to bring her or the family not visiting me because of my fiancee..most of the family not coming to t

the wedding or any family functions for that matter....I do not know what do...I do not want to force them to meet her, but I do want them to meet her sooner than later...

On the bright side of this, my financee has a sister and family in San Francisco(I am in Michigan) so It looks like I will spend the holiday there so she will be feel welcome...she will be in here hopefully December 22, so the plan is to meet her there with her with her family there and bring her to Michigan after the Holidays to begin our new life together.

As anyone else been in this situtuation? And if so, how did you deal with it?

Thanks in advance!

Jaystone

Thanks again for your help!

Mira passed her medical with flying colors! Her results will be at the embassy in time for her interview November 28th!!

Thanks again for your help!

Jaystone

I recommend that she start her Medical on Monday, November 26. If she arrives at St. Lukes early enough, she may be able to complete it in one day. It should not be a problem if she can not complete her medical on Monday. In that case, she can return on Tuesday, November 27 to finish up and get her immunizations.

Regardless of whether she finishes up on Monday or on Tuesday, she should inform St. Lukes that her interview is on Wednesday, November 28, and wants to make sure her medical results arrive at the Embassy in time for her interview. St. Lukes may even allow her to hand-carry her medical results to the Embassy due to the short amount of time between completing her medical and her interview.

The worst-case scenario is if she completes her medical on Tuesday and St. Lukes will not be able to deliver her medical results to the Embassy in time for her interview nor will St. Lukes allow her to hand-carry her medical results to her interview. Even in that case, she definitely should attend her interview. If the Embassy does not have her medical results available for her interview, they simply will issue her form MNL-IV-22 (221g), which will tell her that the Embassy needs to wait for her medical results. Then, when the Embassy receives her medical results, they will start processing her visa.

Thanks for your input...I really appreciate it! I will not cancel the interview.

Thanks again!

Jaystone

I wouldn't cancel/reschedule your interview unless she can't get her medical completed before the interview date. SLEC is pretty good about getting the medical file to USEM.

Thanks, Hank! that is encouraging.

Any more replies/opinions would be appreciated!

Jaystone

Hello Everyone,

I am a newbie here and I have a question.

My fiancee is scheduled for her embassy interview Novebember 28th. She will be in Manilla for her medical November 20th. The plan was to have her medical done on the 20th and the results to be at the embassy by her interview. However, we ran into a problem:

Her period normally is on the 10th-11th of every month, however it was late this month(of all months!!) so my question is, should I cancel the interview and reschedule for another time or should we proceed? Her period should be over by the 23rd so it would be 5 days before her interview.

Thanks for your help!

Jaystone