This story starts out in July of 2007. I had been getting feelings or gut instincts that I had to fly to visit Italy. I tried to ignore my feelings to go because I have never been out of the US before. I also had a fear of flying. This feeling was so strong that I bought a round trip ticket to Italy. I went by myself not knowing anyone there. I stayed in the center of Napoli near the Mediteranean sea. I enjoyed sites and spent my time near the sea on the rocks most days. While there I met some people from Morocco who lived there. I never heard of Morocco before. While getting to know my new found friends they told me they were muslim. I did not understand what a muslim was or what it meant. Which I am happy about because if I would have listened to the views some people have in America against a muslim, my view might have been different. They could not explain to me well enough because of their english. I was able to communicate to them through speaking some english, spanish and italian.
I was very curious about this so when I got back home to US I started to look up Muslim and Islam. I became very intrigued and just kept researching. You see I come from a family that is not religious and I was one who always felt there is more to this life and there is a God. So I was looking before for the "correct" religion. I had become a christian, thinking it was the last religion. I did love my church and the people that go there, but I always had questions that seemed to not be answered. When I prayed, I would pray to God not to Jesus P.B.U.H. . I always felt even before I became a christian that Jesus was not God but his messenger. So while researching Islam I realized this was what I believed because all my unanswered questions were right in front of me and also muslims believe that Jesus P.B.U.H. is a messenger. So I convereted to Islam by stating my declaration of faith. I then was trying to find other muslims on the internet to talk to about Islam. I kept going to sites that had people from Morocco to speak with. I feel that Allah S.W.T. was guiding my heart to find Islam and then guided me to my husband.
I was a member of a music sharing site called Bear Share. You can have a profile sort of like Myspace has. I spoke to a few members there about Islam. One in particular led me to my husband Tariq. Hassan and I were having difficulties communicating at times because he could only speak french and arabic. I was using the google translator alot. One day Hassan says let me ask my friend who is also here in the cyber at the moment to help us translate because he speaks english. I told him ok. Tariq came to his computer and started to type to me and told me hello in the web cam. I felt something come over my body. A fluttery feeling. A feeling I still get to this day with him. I felt very shy to him because of this feeling. But I had stuff I wanted to say to him from that moment on. I kept my feelings inside because I felt it would be inappropriate. After Tariq had left the cyber that day to go to the mosque to pray. I asked if Tariq is usually at the cyber to help us talk. But really I was just trying to find a reason to speak to him again. He told me that Tariq does not usually come to the cyber. He just comes to listen to music and visit with his friends that are at the cyber. I felt instantly depressed and I wondered if I would see him again soon or ever again.
I found myself logging into Bearshare more and more. I would literally just leave my computer on that site just to wait for Hassans name to show up hoping Tariq would be there to translate something for us. The next time I seen Hassan on the site Tariq was there with him. We sat up chatting between the 3 of us about islam, music, and other miscelaneous things. I had the most wonderful time of my life talking with Tariq and he made me smile the whole time. Tariq started to come to the cyber with Hassan everyday. My feelings for Tariq kept getting stronger and stronger. I knew I was in love with him. I still was to shy to say something. I just kept it in. I knew he was so far away and maybe he did not feel the same way. Maybe I would ruin our friendship by saying something. A few months pass and one day Tariq was not at the cyber with Hassan. He told me Tariq was sick at home. I felt awful for him. I wanted to be there to take care of him. I took this time to ask Hassan a few questions about Tariq. I knew Tariq pretty well by this time but I still never asked him for a email address. Hassan told me Tariq did not have one. I then just wanted to cry. I wanted his email address so I could write to him and finally tell Tariq how I felt about him.
On December 19th I had a message in my Bearshare from someone I did not recognise. I opened the message and It was asking for my email address so he could speak to me. I then realised this is Tariq and he must have opened a Bearshare account just to get a message to me. I felt so excited. I sent a email back saying Tariq is this you? I had a reply back from him the next day when I came home. He gave me his email address and asked if I could log into messenger tonight to talk with him. I logged onto messenger to find Tariq also logged on. He started to send me songs. I listened to them and then I had to ask him, "Tariq are you trying to tell me something?" He replied back with a YES and told me he was in love with me. I too of course felt this way so I replied back I love you too Tariq. We both realized then that we both were in love with each other and both were to shy to say anything. I married Tariq on May 2nd 2008 and we had a beautiful reception on may 28th 2008 in his city of Morocco. Those two days were some of the happiest times of my life. I smiled non stop on these days and he still keeps me smiling to this day.
