litlmina

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

I'm sure everyone can distinguish your words and my words (on style and grammar alone), especially in the context of a message board. That's what the "quote" feature does - it means everything in the green box was written by the username at the top.
Your caricature of women as attention-seeking flirts is insulting, and claiming that is their "nature" perpetuates a standard that has been used to discriminate against women for ages. I've barely touched on the fact that you are insinuating that victims of domestic violence are in that position because they didn't "do a good enough job" of bending to the whims of their abusers. His jealousy = his problem. Victim blaming is EXTREMELY detrimental, and if you want to call that "bashing," then, yes, you have "bashed" a group of people who have been abused and terrorized.
The OP was verbally abused. How badly, we don't know. But when she finally stood up to him, you accused her of not being "dependable."
Some people's opinions are racist. Some are homophobic. And some are mysoginistic, whether they are followed with the "IMHO" qualifier or not.

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

I'm sure everyone can distinguish your words and my words (on style and grammar alone), especially in the context of a message board. That's what the "quote" feature does - it means everything in the green box was written by the username at the top.
Your caricature of women as attention-seeking flirts is insulting, and claiming that is their "nature" perpetuates a standard that has been used to discriminate against women for ages. I've barely touched on the fact that you are insinuating that victims of domestic violence are in that position because they didn't "do a good enough job" of bending to the whims of their abusers. His jealousy = his problem. Victim blaming is EXTREMELY detrimental, and if you want to call that "bashing," then, yes, you have "bashed" a group of people who have been abused and terrorized.
The OP was verbally abused. How badly, we don't know. But when she finally stood up to him, you accused her of not being "dependable."
Some people's opinions are racist. Some are homophobic. And some are mysoginistic, whether they are followed with the "IMHO" qualifier or not.

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

I'm sure everyone can distinguish your words and my words (on style and grammar alone), especially in the context of a message board. That's what the "quote" feature does - it means everything in the green box was written by the username at the top.
Your caricature of women as attention-seeking flirts is insulting, and claiming that is their "nature" perpetuates a standard that has been used to discriminate against women for ages. I've barely touched on the fact that you are insinuating that victims of domestic violence are in that position because they didn't "do a good enough job" of bending to the whims of their abusers. His jealousy = his problem. Victim blaming is EXTREMELY detrimental, and if you want to call that "bashing," then, yes, you have "bashed" a group of people who have been abused and terrorized.
The OP was verbally abused. How badly, we don't know. But when she finally stood up to him, you accused her of not being "dependable."
Some people's opinions are racist. Some are homophobic. And some are mysoginistic, whether they are followed with the "IMHO" qualifier or not.

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

I'm sure everyone can distinguish your words and my words (on style and grammar alone), especially in the context of a message board. That's what the "quote" feature does - it means everything in the green box was written by the username at the top.
Your caricature of women as attention-seeking flirts is insulting, and claiming that is their "nature" perpetuates a standard that has been used to discriminate against women for ages. I've barely touched on the fact that you are insinuating that victims of domestic violence are in that position because they didn't "do a good enough job" of bending to the whims of their abusers. His jealousy = his problem. Victim blaming is EXTREMELY detrimental, and if you want to call that "bashing," then, yes, you have "bashed" a group of people who have been abused and terrorized.
The OP was verbally abused. How badly, we don't know. But when she finally stood up to him, you accused her of not being "dependable."
Some people's opinions are racist. Some are homophobic. And some are mysoginistic, whether they are followed with the "IMHO" qualifier or not.

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

This kind of "woman blaming" is part of what reinforces the gender inequality we see in our society AND Latin cultures.
HUMANS are naturally flirty creatures. HUMANS seek attention. The MEN in Latin cultures are usually the initiators of flirting, especially in the OP's experience (catcalling on the street). Regardless, flirting usually goes both ways. To label women as seductive temptresses is offensive and mysoginistic.
OP, it sounds like you have been a victim of abuse. This is how things start - overly "jealous" men who like to control the women they are with. He was trying to CONTROL your actions - first, through his words, and once that failed, maybe through his actions.
I applaud you for being brave enough to buy him a ticket home, and I'm aghast that people fault you for getting out of a bad situation. The minute my partner abuses me in ANY way in my home, that ceases to be his home. Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to "victim blame" in our society, ie, "her skirt was so short, she was asking for it."
My own heritage is not American, and I am familiar with multiple cultures. It is not okay, in any culture, or any country, for your partner to control you and verbally abuse you. My heart goes out to you, and please know that you deserve a relationship built on mutual respect and TRUST.
Of course, you can't just turn off your love for him like a lightswitch, and it must be difficult to be alone after being together for so long. I hope that when (if) he comes back to the States, he will stick with the counseling. It sounds like you need a little time apart, and when (if) you start talking about him coming back again, you will see a change in him and will set firm boundaries. We don't know all the details of your relationship and if things crossed a line or not, but hopefully by making a commitment to work things out with a third party you can enjoy the happiness you felt in the beginning of your marriage.

Really? Please stop attacking the OP for trying to be informed. Clearly this is not a person who is content to be ignorant about their responsibilities.
If you can't afford car insurance, you just don't drive a car. That's not a mandatory expense. It's not like you can stop living if you can't afford health insurance.
And if you can't afford food or housing, there are homeless shelters and food banks (among other options) - most of them are CHARITIES, and I don't see anyone calling those people parasites. That's extremely rude.

I'm not saying I don't WANT to obtain it, sheesh! I just can't afford it right now, and don't see that changing anytime soon! I'm trying to figure out just how this is supposed to be a benefit to us is all. If there IS an emergency, I CAN access help, that's not parasitical behaviour, it's called charity, and I would advise anyone in a situation where they find themselves unable to pay for healthcare themselves to seek help. What would you HAVE these parasites do, just suffer with the illness and injury lest they take on government services, god forbid?
I think that's per person, I was using the calculator for a family of three to obtain that figure

If you don't want this to be political, you may want to refer to it as the Affordable Healthcare Act.
These are great questions, and hopefully the media will be all over this in the coming weeks - running stories that answer these questions.
In the meantime, have you checked out http://www.healthcare.gov/law/information-for-you/index.html ? There's a lot of info on the site, and there's a "Find Insurance Options" section where I think you can look at plans and run some numbers.

Even CAPITAL ONE BANK would give u a card and YES i did it,, there is nothing illegal abt that, and yes u do have to answer a lot of security questions,,and as long as u r not committing fraud and it is ur own account there is nothing to yikes abt,its 100% legal.

wow Congrats
guess it was good idea you didnt listen to all the negative feedback you were getting

I just read back through all of your many threads on this topic, and all I saw was people being unfailingly helpful in trying to point out potential issues that may arise with the evidence you are planning to present in support of your case. I'm guessing this latest tirade from you is probably going to quash that helpfulness pretty effectively, though. Maybe it's time to take a breather from Teh Internetz if you're getting this worked up about what total strangers say to you in an online forum?
Remember, though: no matter how well or how badly you do at convincing people on VJ of whatever you are trying to prove, it won't make a whit of difference in your immigration process what people at VJ think.
All that matters is the evidence. No, it doesn't feel good to live your life being constantly aware of the necessity of creating evidence along the way for future immigration processes, but it's part of the reality of being in an international relationship, and most of us are used to it by now (or getting there).

I too never had a social security number until April of this year, but I still managed to get utilities in my name and open bank accounts when I was single-- otherwise I would have spent the entire first year of my life in the U.S. without electricity in my apartment
When I was married I got added to wife's bank account and added onto a family plan through Verizon without any issue and I still didn't have a SSN at that point. There are things you can to do without a SSN.
Now, so far you have:
-Marriage certificate.
-A few photos.
-Child's birth certificate.
-Mail with the same address.
The USCIS has very specific guidelines about what they want to see, we here on the forum do not make the rules, we only follow them and then share our knowledge of what we have learned throughout the process with others so that they can be better informed and have what is needed in order to have the best chance at being successful in their journey. Nobody here is trying to personally attack you and nor are we judging your marriage; that is the IO's job on the day of your interview, we are just trying to respectively let you know that through our collective experiences and from what we have learned from others on this forum that your evidence may not be enough to satisfy the interviewing officer.
I would look at trying to get yourself added to your lease or get your landlord to write a letter stating that three (you, your husband and child) of you are currently living together and have lived together for x number years. Since you now have a social, look at trying to get yourself added to utilities, you can also open up a joint *checking* account that has nothing to do with credit scores and will not affect your credit history. Do you have a state ID or DL that is in your married name? If not, I would look into getting that changed, the same with your passport and Social Security Card.

Just like previous people have said, we're trying to help you, not bash you.
And I'm going to say this and leave it alone: If you believe that having a child together and having a marriage certificate is enough evidence for USCIS, then by all means, take that, and only that to the interview and take your chances. The overwhelming majority of folks who have replied to your posts are telling you that's probably not going to be enough.
At the end of the day, we aren't the people you have to convince. You only have to convince one person; the USCIS employee who interviews you.
Good luck.

Thank you! I had the same disgusted feeling but was unable to articulate it as well as you have.
When one guy was dumped by a Filipino woman, one of the posts in response said, "Just go sit at an open air cafe, and you'll find another ONE in no time."
...
As if a woman were nothing more than a used car - interchangeable and disposable. And the poster was treated as if he (and all other American men wanting to marry Filipinos) were God's gift to women.

OP - It appears that Bob 4 Anna has access to USCIS files and can tell you that every I-765 petition takes 76 days to be approved. And we know that everyone's journey always follows the estimated times that are posted on the USCIS website. The people who had paperwork approved in less time must be lying to make the rest of us frustrated.
/sarcasm
Have you ever heard the saying about making assumptions?
Is there a way for her to work here legally on her K-1 visa? Yes, there is. Is it the most efficient way to obtain a work permit? No. None of us know the details of her situation, but the best way to find out is to ask.

Wow, talk about harsh.
If anyone here has read The Phantom Tollbooth, they would know how dangerous and unproductive it is to jump to conclusions.
Did she file for permission to work on her K-1 visa, or did she receive some kind of temporary work approval when she entered the country?