Teffah

They will not let you in with the cell phone and the american citizen will not be permitted to go in either. I had to sit across the street in a cafe and wait for 3 hours while the interview was being conducted. I held my fiances cell phone for him until he came out. This was our experience in Casablanca.

Your wife having a new job does not seem like a legitimatereason to not help with your case. You should not be doing it all. If there isa will, on her part, there is a way. She CAN help. I, in fact, did most of thework for my husband’s case or we did it together. I wouldn't have trusted himto do it all by himself! When workingwith the consulate they want to see exacts, but not memorization. Morocco is arough consulate. I also had chat logs but I only submitted a few pages fromeach month that we chatted along with a few pictures. Like another poster said,you have a lot of red flags but anything is possible. First and foremost youmust get your wife active in your case. Good luck and contnue to ask questions, there are many indivduals with VJ with outstanding information and experience.

Your wife having a new job does not seem like a legitimatereason to not help with your case. You should not be doing it all. If there isa will, on her part, there is a way. She CAN help. I, in fact, did most of thework for my husband’s case or we did it together. I wouldn't have trusted himto do it all by himself! When workingwith the consulate they want to see exacts, but not memorization. Morocco is arough consulate. I also had chat logs but I only submitted a few pages fromeach month that we chatted along with a few pictures. Like another poster said,you have a lot of red flags but anything is possible. First and foremost youmust get your wife active in your case. Good luck and contnue to ask questions, there are many indivduals with VJ with outstanding information and experience.

Your wife having a new job does not seem like a legitimatereason to not help with your case. You should not be doing it all. If there isa will, on her part, there is a way. She CAN help. I, in fact, did most of thework for my husband’s case or we did it together. I wouldn't have trusted himto do it all by himself! When workingwith the consulate they want to see exacts, but not memorization. Morocco is arough consulate. I also had chat logs but I only submitted a few pages fromeach month that we chatted along with a few pictures. Like another poster said,you have a lot of red flags but anything is possible. First and foremost youmust get your wife active in your case. Good luck and contnue to ask questions, there are many indivduals with VJ with outstanding information and experience.

Visitor's visa from Morocco is very difficult to get. With an American wife...impossible.

From what I have heard from other members more experienced than me, the K3 visa is now obsolete. It was created when a CR1/IR1 visa used to take well over a year to be issued. It would have gotten your husband to you in about 8 months. Ever since the changes made the CR1/IR1 now takes 9-10 months to be issued, K3 is no longer worth it.

Cancel the satellite service; use the money to hire a maid !

If he is close to the consulate, just take it there and insist on a new envelope--worse case they tape it !!

I would not make arrangements until you have the visa in hand! Even if you are approved it can take weeks or months to get your visa! Everyone's case is different... my husband got his visa within a week after his interview, but others have been approved and were still placed in AP and waited months.

Ai, why would you want to be married to an a*hole?

No, Resha, not every man is an "a-hole." My husband, my father, my brothers, my husband's father and brothers, and so many more - none of them are "a-holes." It makes me sad to think about what kind of experiences in your life could have led you to such a conclusion. And it disturbs me that you would want to remain married to a man that you describe in this way.
Anyway - as I said before - no one can decide how you will accept being treated except you. I don't believe that anyone here wishes you any ill or any more pain - I think we all wish you and your daughter a happy and safe life. You said you are in counseling, which is a very good start. But please remember that it takes two to make a marriage work, no matter how hard one person may try. Your husband needs counseling as well. He (and you !) have to do a lot more than just be willing to change - you both have to make the effort to actually change.
Treating each other with respect is the foundation of a successful marriage, and it's a two-way street. If you really think your marriage can be repaired, remember that referring to your husband in terms like "a-hole" is not respectful - even if it wasn't said to his face, or only said in anger and frustration.
I do wish you and your family the best.

Resha, my prayers are with you. Please seek help for the two of you. You deserve a life filled with peace and grace. God bless your little family.

You'd be surprised.

Maybe he found out it will be easier to remove conditions if he sticks it out with her....I don't think I trust this guy. What he said to you was degrading IMO....do what you need to do....but I would still document anything just in case...

I know everyone is telling you to leave him, but I also know that until you believe that, it won't do much to hear other people talk ###### about him.
So, my loving, supportive advice to you is the following: take care of yourself and your daughter right now. You might not be at the point where you can leave him, and that decision needs to be a decision that you make yourself and an empowering step for you.
Do what it takes to do what is right for the two of you. Take a vacation with her, stay with a friend... treat yourself to a spa night... write down all the things that you deserve as a human being and a bright, strong woman. Write down what you need to be happy and whole, and ask yourself what steps you can and are willing to take to get there or at what point you are willing to leave.
People can tell you left and right to leave him, but it's meaningless unless you get to that point and believe it is the right thing.
What do you need to be in a healthy relationship? Are you in one now? Do you think you deserve to be in a healthy relationship? Do you think your daughter deserves to be in a healthy and functioning family?
What have you already given up of yourself? You say you have already begun to lose yourself-- how much more of you can you afford to lose while still being a mother to your daughter? How much of you are you willing to give up? Are you able to put your foot down and stand up for your own self worth and needs as a partner, mother, wife, and individual?
It's hard to leave someone you love. It sounds like you still love him, and that is understandable. Don't get mad at yourself for caring about him-- that's normal. You invested years of your life to build something together with him. You share a child. You shared yourself, you gave, you sacrificed, and you gave yourself to your relationship. If it was easy to leave him or to stop loving him, it means that you didn't have anything in the first place. It's not something you can just walk away from.
But it sounds like you need to take steps to take care of yourself and your daughter. You are in an unacceptable situation right now, and it is YOUR responsibility to take care of yourself and her. Nobody else can do that for you, nobody else can make that decision for you. And no matter what those steps are, my wish and hope for you is that you, maybe with the help of a counselor or therapist can do the following:
- Accept that you and your daughter are people who deserve respect, who are worthy of love and support, and who are doing the best that you can. Accept that you do not deserve to be treated badly. You deserve better.
- Accept that it is your responsibility to make a plan, whatever that plan may be, to get yourselves out of this painful situation. Take whatever energy you have to follow the plan. If it means trying to make things better, then fine... but know you have to be firm and set ground rules and you cannot allow things to get back to how they are now. If it means a plan to eventually leave, or take a break, or have a trial separation, then you do what you have to do, you set deadlines for things, and you do it. Nobody else can do this step for you or make you do it. It is your responsibility.
- Put all of the energy that you have into yourself and your daughter and taking care of yourselves. Again-- whether it's a spa night, moving in with a friend for awhile, a mini-vacation, a shopping spree, girls' nights in...whatever it takes and whatever you have the resources and time and energy for, you need to take care of yourselves.
- Allow yourself to grieve, to suffer, to cry, and to think that life isn't fair. Don't beat yourself up for being upset. You gave yourself to make something work that isn't working. You gave your love to someone who is unable right now to give it back. You have given a piece of yourself and lost it. You have lost a lover and a friend and it sounds like a relationship. You don't have to accept it and be strong and move on-- the fact that you gave so much means that you have a RIGHT to grieve it. It means that it was and is worth something. It shows that you care. You have a right to cry, a right to be angry, a right to let some things that aren't important in the long run go (as long as you and your daughters' needs are met), and by all means, the right to express things.
And if you can't stand up for yourself right now, then use your daughter and draw strength from her-- from you as a mother protecting and standing up for your child.
I hope that this doesn't come across condescending or harmful. I have been reading this thread for the last few days and my heart aches every time I read it. I say this to you with all of the good wishes and love that an internet stranger can give, and I truly wish you and your daughter peace in your process, wherever it takes you.

You don't really love him; you love what you want him to be. But, that's not who he is, and you need to accept that. This is not only about what he does or doesn't do. It's also about what you do or don't do. You can't make him treat you well,but you can treat yourself well, but that won't happen as long as you have him believing that you're not willing to make his life at least as hard as he's making yours.
Since he's so happy hanging out with his cousin, and not with you and your daughter, thrill him to no end by making that arrangement permanent asap.

Fill out your time-line!!