Hot Vit Lon

My wife just got her interview on the 14th. She's got pink. Interview was hard that's what she said. Consulate ask nothing about my personal life info. Consulate was questioning her mostly about the du hoc visa that she applied back in 08'. Interview 6 times for du hoc but did not pass. They keep on saying they don't believe that our relationship is genuine (6 years relationship). I had tons of evidence but they did not even look at any except the pictures that I first met my wife back in 2005 and my first email that I sent to my wife in 2005. My wife keep on arguing back that if you don't believe then you can go investigate our relationship. The consulate keep on putting words in her mouth saying that she said this and she said that but she never did. They were trying to play her mind to see if she would react to those accusations. I was waiting for her from 8am to 12 pm. Appointment was at 8 but she didn't get interview til' 12. She ask if the consulate would like to speak to me but the consulate said no need. In the end the consulate said "I don't really believe that your relationship is 6 years long, but I will pass you anyways" thank god. Weird that the consulate said he don't believe, then why did he pass my wife. Well I am very happy right now and waiting to pickup her visa next week then book a flight so I can fly back to US with her. Anyone have any questions for me, feel free to ask.

If at first you failed, try til' you pass. Fraud or not, I've got to admire her persistence. Success at last................and it's FREE too.

Well, it certainly wasn't because she thought the property ownership laws in the US were much more fair than the property ownership laws in Vietnam. In fact, she doesn't know a damn thing about the property ownership laws in the US, and she really doesn't care. She's not a crusader of any sort. She came to the US to marry me and live with me. We both chose the US over Vietnam because I have a successful career here and could provide for both of us comfortably, but we were both willing to stay in Vietnam if that's how it would have worked out at the consulate. We discussed all of the possible options before we started down this road.

That doesn't mean it was a slam dunk decision. She gave up a lot to come here. She had to sell her home because none of her family wanted to leave the village and live in Hue City, and she was afraid the government would seize her house if nobody lived there. She had to sell it well below market value because of the f'ing red book. That was a bitter pill to swallow because she worked her butt off for 10 years to get that house. She also gave up her career as a school teacher, and now she's looking at the daunting task of going back to school for years to get a teaching certificate so she can teach in the US. By the time she does that she'll be in her 50's. In the meantime, she's watching her granddaughter grow up on a webcam, and she's relying on her brother (who isn't the sharpest tool in the shed) to take care of her 70+ year old mother. There were and still are a lot of sacrifices. As unbelievable as this might be to you, many people are actually happy living in Vietnam, and many aren't strongly attracted by the lure of a better standard of living in the US if it means giving up the things in life that make them happy. Maybe you're not old enough to understand this yet.

Can someone please hand me a tissue? I'm crying.....hu ...hu....hu reading the "sacrifice" she gave up for Jim!

Jim, you're right that I'm not that old to "understand" a thing about Vietcong. That's why I take the words from the "older" generations, folks who lived and dealed with Vietcong and know the famous saying (which you said it yourself before on VJ)" Dung nghe nhung gi Cong san noi, ma hay nhin nhung gi Cong san lam" (Don't listen to what commies say, but rather watch what they do)

Do a Google search on "eminent domain". You own property in the US as long as the government doesn't have any interest in taking it away from you. However, if the government decides your property would serve the public good better if it were part of a new shopping center then you're going to lose your home, and there is very little you can do to stop it.

I recently saw the city council in my town clear out an entire neighborhood using eminent domain. They wanted to build an office park, supposedly to attract businesses to the city "for the public good". The investor backed out after they'd already condemned all of the homes, so they sold the property to another investor who just leveled the homes and built new ones that sold for twice as much as the original homes. Some of the original homeowners sued the city trying to get their properties back for the paltry sum the city originally paid them. They lost.

Then why did your wife come to the US? What for? To re-write the existing "eminent domain" laws in the US? I can't wait til she's successful doing that.

Read again what JimVaPhuong said about eminent domain.

You can also do some research into banks foreclosing on houses that they know they don't own. Usually some kind of clerical error gets a house the bank doesn't own in the foreclosure process. The bank reviews the paperwork, discovers they don't actually own the mortgage for the house, but they proceed on foreclosing the house anyway and the government allows this. A license to steal basically.

There is also a tax lien if you don't pay your taxes. This gives the government the right to property you currently own, as well as all property that you acquire after the lien is placed. (There is a statute of limitations on a property lien which spans a 10 year period.)

There is also a judgment lien which can be placed on your property if you don't pay some kinds of debts. Whether your house is forclosed upon depends on the lien holder.

Liens are a bit fairer, but they still give the government or somebody the right to your property if you owe them money.

Please see my above post as my reply to you.

You think you really own land in the USA? I challenge you to buy a house or property and not pay your property taxes or HOA fees and then see who the true owner is.

You're not even close to compare apple to apple.

In VN, when you already paid your dues and own outright your properties, the gov't can change the law(s) any time it sees fit and take away your properties or limit your ability to sell them. (ask your wife how the gov't can hold your house hostage and make you pay dearly for that "red book")

Here, if you've paid your mortgage on time and all of your dues (mind you, if noone wanna paid property taxes and HOA dues, who will provide services like police, garbage collection, fire, public school, etc???) noone will take away your properties.

Bottom line, if you feel your money will serve you better in VN, please, feel free.

Just remember one thing, 35 years after the war ended, VN is still NOWHERE compared to other Asian countries. It's still among the poorest in the world. South Korea prospers and North Korea is.......?

See the common bond here?

One more thing and this issue is about my wife. She loves to "price match" here in the US and use coupons for grocery shopping. I personally love the "easy" return policy of most retailers in the US.

Is there such a thing in VN? I wouldn't think so. Have you shopped at the Hong Kong Market on Bellaire Blvd? Have you seen how people behave at the seafood counter? (they just don't care to wait in line for their turn) You want that kinda lifestyle (prob 10 times worse) in VN?

For me, a big No thanks.

Wow.. my response was because I am White? You have a seriously misguided & narrow perception of people of other races as well as VN... Peoples comfort as well as their desire to go to VN has nothing to do with their race. based on the bolded above, you are not going to the right places... I have worked in Vn for many years and the climate is much the same as Florida or Texas... The cleanliness, safety and noise would depend on where you are.. It is far from being everywhere. When it gets too hot, we take a nap, then we wake up and go swim in the lake for a bit... VN may seem chaotic, but it's people are actually more relaxed and laid back that the in US... VN drivers are far more attentive than US drivers... You won't see someone driving down the road in VN putting on makeup or reading a newspaper...

I've seen drivers in the US texting while doing an 80mph on freeway. I even had nightmare about it one night. Just scary to think about the bad consequences those nutty drivers can create.

After visting Vietnam in the last few years, I throughly enjoy it.

The culture and the people...you got the goods and the bads.

Have any you consider buying house in Vietnam after retirement?

Dat Lat is a great place to retire in.

My wife definitely wants a house in Vietnam when we retire. I like to spend 6 months of summer in Dat Lat and 6 months of winter in good old Houston.

Pros: Cost of living is low, people in Vietnam are easy going, wife would be really happy, less stress, time to see all of Vietnam and surrounding countries.

Cons: Hot and humid (Houston is a worser Hell if you look at it this way...it hotter and more humid in Houston than Vietnam), cost of travelling back and forth and travel time

If someone else pays for the house, sure, I'll buy it.

If I have to cough up with MY OWN money, no thanks. Why? I'm from that country and I know how the laws in that country function. I'm not STUPID to bring my money to a place full of bribery and the law got bent to whatever angle the gov't officials see fit. Are you kidding me? After I was able to get out of that hell hole, I consider myself reborn for the second time this lifetime. Why on earth would I wanna move back there?(that's just my own opinion)

Now if your family or hers get some kinda connection with the gov't over there, then by all means, enjoy the wonderful life.

OP, you forgot one important fact about Vietnam, they prefer to use the US dollars. No other country in the world (yes, even the poorest country in Africa) would have a currency exchange rate of $1 USD to $20,000 Dong. There must be a reason for it right? I'm no economist but I can tell you that's not a society I myself wanna live in nor for my children.

The US is not the best in the world but given 2 choices you asked, for me, it's a clear and easy pick.

Edit to add: Yes, Houston is HOT but when was the last time your electricity got cut off due to lack of resources? In Saigon and almost elsewhere in VN, "Cup dien" is as often as sun sets and sun rises. No thanks.

.......................and some people desire to move back and live in that society................................yawning...................................good luck and wish ya the best trying not to be killed in traffic and no one cares (literally since in that society it's much cheaper to kill an injured person than keeping that person alive)

Hello all,

Long story short: I met my fiancé 1st trip, and recently came back for 2nd trip. I’m going back in 6 months with my parents to do the ceremony. Should I go ahead and file the K1 paperwork now? Or wait after the ceremony? Any thoughts would be appreciated.

vyx

The way you rushed telling your "love story", I can tell the ingenuity of it.

How long in between the 2 trips so far? It'd be no good if the first was back in July, then came back the following month (August) and then next month for the Engagement.

Then the C/O would think you're a bunny on Super Viagra.

Slow down buddy and don't let her rush you on your "Bachelor" game. Wait at least 1.5 years from start (initial meeting) to finish (filing the petition).

If you speak Vnese, "tu tu de cho tinh yeu len men mot chut da"!!!!!

so how much does it cost to get all this done by yourself? Will it be around $200-$400 USD or less because Service (Dịch vụ) charge around that to do get the công hàm độc thân

Does it matter to you how much "time" is worth in terms of money? Some people believe "time is money", and some don't. Which one are you?

Baiting post.

And this situation will eventually apply to you as well, once her 3-year waiting period is up and she's got her citizenship. I don't care to bait/[whatever word you care to insert here] anyone. It's the fact. You're the one who bear the responsibility and burden[/b]. I'm just the one to bring you back to reality. If you think that's the cause to celebrate, your choice. I'd be careless.

Expect to "sponsor" someone else in her family in the future. It's that simple.

Just wanted everyone to know my wife passed her Citizenship Test

It was a long journey, but finally the end has come. So happy right now!!!!!!

Not really. Be prepared, financially and emotionally. She's now legal to submit her petition for one or more of her immediate relative(s) in VN. Your headache (new) just got started!

Anh Map is correct, of course that you need to treat getting your US Visa like a full-time job for success, but that is dealing with the US and I 100% agree. For those who went through K1 or K3 and didn't have to file your marriage in the VN system, the rules are different and I will leave it at that.

However, once you have your VN marriage certificate the hard work begins and Anh Map's advice kicks in, and I reiterate it in a full-throated fashion.

He (the OP) already got 2 jobs (assuming he's telling the truth). Her job is to make sure she knows what it takes to fulfill the legal requirement and then fruit the labor til the marriage is final. After all, she's the ONE that will benefit from the marriage the most.

Another member in here, with the name starting with "K" went through all the trouble to get married, brought her here, and got the boot once she achieved what she wanted. Not everyone will be the same but try not to be laughed at like such case.

I bet lots of people keep saying "I'm so busy and I have no time to do any research on this and that subject."

And they do have time to chit chat for hours EVERYDAY and able to produce "tons" of chat logs at the interview.

Hey guys I need some please. I need to know what is the process of getting married in Vietnam? What do I need to do first? What paper/document do I need to get? Where do I get it from? Before I go back to Vietnam for the wedding and getting the Certificate of Marriage. I know a lot of you folk have gone through this and have experienced, so if you don't mind helping a newcomer that would be great. If you tell me to do some reading or search the forum. Well honestly I don't have the time to read every single thread/topic. I'm working 2 jobs so my time is very limited, so I'm sorry if I'm being rude or you could called it lazy but still it not going to kill you to just take a little time like what 5-10min to shared your experienced or if you know a link for this. While you guys taking your precious time to help me, I will however try my best in my busy busy scheduled to search the forum on this topic. Once again thank you in advanced for taking the time to me out. God Bless You All!

With 2 jobs, how will you find spare time to take vacation(s) in VN? Please! If you're too lazy to do the search on this marriage subject yourself, which were already discussed in details so many times in here, how will you pass the Visa application process later on?

You do realize that the marriage is only the first small step? You have to pay many more trips after the marriage in hope your petition will be successful? Stop wasting your own and our time!

Question/Curiosity - Why would the denial for her mother's tourist visa as well as the OP's fiance's prior student visa request be a red flag? These visas are not considered to be immigration visas unless the intent was to immigrate to the US.

For Vietnam in particular, once a person has shown his/her interest to enter the US by whatever means, student, tourist Visa, and got denied in the past, any other attempt for other type of Visa in the future will be flagged down as an attempt to commit immigration fraud. Vietnam is a poor country and its people will do whatever necessary to flee the country.

Its people used to pay ($25K to $35K) to achieve that purpose and nowadays they get smart and learn how to use their "love" to manipulate "suckers". And there's the saying "There's a sucker born every minute".

Well to answer some of the questions. I have known the family member 10 years.

Her mom was actually approved for a green card to come to the US some years ago after being sponsored by her relative in the US. Her mom refused to move to the US. Her mom doesn't want to leave Vietnam. In fact, her mom actually hates Americans. The only reason I was able to meet her was because of my friend's introduction. He actually had to argue with her because I am an American. So I'm pretty certain it's not because they want to move to the US. She had a chance and didn't want to. Contrary to what the US consulate in HCMC thinks, not everybody wants to live in the USA.

I will admit that I tend to be on the paranoid side, it's just my peronsality. I've gotten a lot of good advice from this forum which I have followed. I would have never saved my boarding passes, phone records, taken a change of clothing for each day, etc. without it. But it seems like HCMC is always changing the rules.

I actually have thought this though. My plan was never to file a K1. I was planning to eventually do the CR-1 route. If failed, I might fight it. But considering I already have a strong desire to leave the USA, I might just use it as an excuse to leave and be done with this country. I would not mind moving to Vietnam once I have saved up enough money. Maybe I subconsciously want her to fail the interview so I can use it as an excuse to leave the USA!

I need to think this through some more. Thanks for your advice guys and gals.

Yeah right! and she was refused the Tourist Visa and her daughter's Student Visa got denied. Yawning! "Ngheo` ma` doi` an xoi gac'"

I just laugh whenever people say this "I'm filthy rich in VN! I never care to move to the US." And many moons later, they're lining up outside the US CO waiting for their interview.

I'm trying to get some photos of my gf and her family. Her parents in any photos do not look like they want to be in them. They are actually good to me outside of the camera. But they really hate photos for superstitious reasons. In the photos her parents are in with us they really look like they do not want to be in them.

Among other red flags, I was introduced by a family member of hers in the US who I work with. Age difference is 12 years. She failed a student visa once. Mom failed a tourist visa once because she didn't get evidence for her house and bank account.

In light of the red flags combined with her parent's unwillingness to smile in photos or even look at the camera, I am serious considering ending this relationship because I fear even if I go the CR-1 route, it will be denied for lack of family photos and the way her parents look like they don't want to be in the photos.

Am I justified in this fear?

Even if they smiled like they just won the jackpot lottery in their photos, your case will most likely get denied due to the bold highlight I quoted.

[start of "Dr Phil" amateur advice]...............Are you still sure they're NOT trying to use you to get their feet in the US? (Since they failed on their own attempt)..............And you realize the US C/O would NOT fail to notice this fact right?

What you're doing right now is very similar to taking your whole month of salary to Vegas and "hope" your luck will take care of the next 3-month mortgage payments! Sure, it can happen, but what's your odd? [End of "Dr Phil" amateur advice]

If you're about to eat something, please stop reading my post below...........................Fair warning.................

Imagine if some food (Mam Tom is one of them) smell that bad "outside" your digestive tracks, how much worse could them be "inside" there? And wouldn't you think that horrid smell would cause some of the "good" bacterias in there to take a good vacation in order to avoid those nasty food?

Instead of consuming good food with "good bacteria", ie. yogurt, people choose to do otherwise. Sad.

Lots of Vnese love eating salty, high saturated fat food (well seasoned with MSG) combined with lots of smoking.

End of smelly whining, without cheese.

Edit to add: I used to work at a "Pho" (noodle house) restaurant. I can tell you, eat whatever else, cereal, a banana, whatever than a bowl of Pho. You're doing your body a big favor! Once you've seen what's going on inside the kitchen, "throw up" is too nice of a word to describe afterwards. Some people think that hot soup (nuoc leo`) would kill any harmful organism in there. Big laugh!

It looks like you have managed to attain the point of harmony in the daily life of your mixed culture family. I can't even imagine a completely Vietnamese family that will be able to make it a day with each other if they're the same as yours (kids from previous marriages of both of you, your mom and you two all living together). I think the key is the acknowledgement and respect for each other's differences, and it's something I want to achieve for my own family.

For better or worse, I am extremely adaptable, plus we'd been living together for a year when we got married (very un-Vietnamese, I know) so pretty much no adjustment was needed afterwards. Nowadays we could pass for a normal American couple, unless someone asks me where I am from, for as it happens I speak English with a perfect standard American accent, and we've only lived in culturally diverse cities in the US where Asian-Caucasian relationships are sometimes the majority of what you see. It made things easy for us, but it could also make my husband let his guards down and become unaware that living with my parents/family can require a lot more adjustment/compromise than living with me (on a side note, my husband enjoys "mam tom," so maybe durian will be okay for him, while I can't stand it myself, ironically. I also think dried squid + Siriracha is delicious, and I'm going to steal the toaster oven idea from your stepson )

One thing I notice that could cause problem for us later on is that personal space/boundary is an almost nonexistent concept in a Vietnamese family. My parents might find it hard to accept that we sometimes will want to make important decisions without their input, or as mentioned in previous replies, that we might want to do our own things once in a while or even live in our separate space across the yard from theirs. Autonomy is something I have come to appreciate about living in America, so if my parents are unwilling to compromise on that,it might probably be the most contentious aspect of living together. Other than that, I can see many positive things about a mixed culture family. For one, it will be a unique, ever changing experience where everyone gets to learn something new everyday

From your recommendations, I think I will get Rosetta Stone for my husband to help him get a head start on the language. It's funny because even though I, like most ESL people, struggled as first with English, now that I have become fluent I realized that it is probably the easiest second language to learn. Vietnamese is not monstrously difficult like some other languages, but it is quite challenging because of the lack of well-defined structures and the abundance of hidden nuances. I do appreciate my husband's eagerness to learn it, and will do my best to help him. Thanks for your recommendations, and good luck with tackling it yourself.

Specifically in response to the bold part I highlighted, it's "un-American" (those that listen to Dr Laura Schlessinger and many other Christians) as well. But since you mentioned "un-Vnese", did you know that most Vnese parents will NEVER allow their daughters to live with their "future" husbands before the marriage vows? At least my own parents (and they have no daughters) and my in-laws and the majority (99%) of our relatives.

Not only they won't attend the wedding, they simply refuse to recognize the relationship.

And I can tell you it's NOT restricted to "old-fashioned/tradition" Vnese. According to Dave Ramsey, more than 90% of marriages in which folks live with each other before the vows will most likely end up in divorces later on. Dave Ramsey surely is NOT a VNese in any fashion.

Sometimes some people "think" they're living in progressive, modernized world. Are they?

I can tell you that this had happened to me. You did ask me about not getting stamped a while back.

My visa stamp was stapled into my passport. On the day of my departure they removed my visa stamp and handed my passport to me. When I got home and began working on my k-1 petition that is when I noticed there was no ink on any of my pages.

You didn't know that the very first thing one's supposed to do the next morning after arrival is to photocopy that Attached Visa with the VNese Custom Arrival stamp on it? Now you know. Hopefully others reading do as well!

Copies of trip ticket stubs/ boarding passes and similar items are meaningless to the C/O. Only copies of the Visa stamps and your credit card statements showing the transactions and dates count.

yes unfortunately this was the second they refused to accept the documents when my wife went to the consulate .. i was wondering if they picked on my wife intentionally? blue slip says we can drop off the documents, right? or did i misinterpret the meaning of it? please advice what i should do next. thanks all!

Re-read, then do that hundreds, thousands, millions of times.......................to bypass time til' the date shown on the blue slip instructing you to come back submitting the requested documents arrives???

Seriously, can you follow instructions?

A month of waiting is nothing. What if your case eventually falls into AR, then you two will have to wait indefinitely til the C/O is satisfied with his/her investigation. Sheese, by then you'd be thankful a month of waiting is peanuts!

Edit to add: Since you said in your very first post of this thread that you followed VJ's advice. Go back there (the CO) and tell them "Hey, I just followed VJ's advice. You should do the same too." See if that trick works!

Lots of folks that I know, including myself, do this to "satisfy" both sides, spouse and parents, choose a place to live close to where your/his parents live.

You shouldn't discuss such important and sensitive issue with anyone BUT your spouse. You're NOT that old-tradition btw (you already stepped outside the "norm" circle for deciding to marry someone outside your own race). So stop acting like you're a typical old-tradition Vnese lady, being loyal "co' hieu'" with your own parents. Please, save the drama.

http://www.dallasnews.com/news/community-news/grand-prairie/headlines/20110726-survivors-recall-grand-prairie-roller-rink-shootings-.ece

When you're married, learn to draw the line between responsibility to own-family and "new" family.

If your parents are more important to you, why bother getting married? Time to raise your own and direct 100% of your focus on that!

Edit to add: to all with Vnese spouses, one day she/he will ask you to send more and more and more money to her/his family in VN (like you must have that financial obligation to her/his family). You, on the other hand, wanna reserve that money for your own family here in the US. Time to decide whether she/he values which family is more important than which.

Hey, what do you want? A good advice or a bad advice? You want to spam this forum?

You should check the details carefully before you ask, and don't overuse the others' time and knowledge for such easy things.

This response is NOT a violation of the TOS? The MODS deleted my posts left and right because they "claimed" my posts violated the TOS (for attacking someone else). But this user is a female and it's OK huh? No wonder why most of you got that ***####### treatment from the US C/O in Saigon.

Opinions are like a***holes; everyone's got one. This just proves it.

My main concern is that although we're married officially and if her visa expired before she got the green card, so will she able to stay here?

How long it takes for someone to get the green card?

Thank you

You really need to do a little bit of reading/research on your own before asking this type of question. A Visa is used to "enter" the US, not determine the legal immigration status of a person.