TBoneTX

Thrilling Friday GS/ES/MS report, see man: The MS was a joke, drive right by we man. The ESs and the church GS yielded the take, see man: -- full bottle Acure conditioner, thick warshcloth, pocket comb = $1, steal man -- 2 bath-towels, 1 hand-towel (matching), pants for Mini-B., small picture frame = $Many ($2+1), steal man -- onecan tuna, onecan pork & beans, onecan pinto beans, onecan carrots = $2, steal man Total = $Many ($2+2+2) We also espied a Manygonal ([2+2+2]gonal) coffee table that we hope will still be at the last ES when things go to Many% ([2x2x2x2 + 2x2x2 +1]%) off on Saturday, hope we man.

9 Beauty Tips For Making Yourself Totally Irresistible To Men Ladies, we know you want us. Who wouldn't? Every woman wants a guy who spends all his time talking about Tolkien and Star Wars and playing Zelda, but how can you attract one? It's an age-old question, but thankfully, there are very simple answers. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/9-beauty-tips-for-making-yourself-more-attractive-to-men

Mayorkas Testifies Before Congress That He Is Not Bald WASHINGTON, D.C. — The U.S. Secretary of Homeland Security Alejandro Mayorkas was summoned to Capitol Hill today to give testimony before a congressional committee that he is not, in fact, bald. Mayorkas stood by his previous claims that he is not bald even after photographic and video evidence otherwise was made public. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/mayorkas-testifies-before-congress-that-he-is-not-bald

McConnell Suffers Stroke, Surges To Lead In Democratic Primary WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an unexpected turn of events, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell has rocketed to the top of polls for the 2024 Democratic Party nomination for president after suffering what appeared to be a stroke in the middle of a press conference yesterday. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/mcconnell-suffers-stroke-surges-to-lead-in-democratic-primary

Oh No: Your Wife Has Sent You Several 'Funny' Videos And She Expects You To Watch Them U.S. — According to the results of a survey conducted among married women, over 100% of wives are waiting for feedback about the funny videos they sent their husbands at any given time. Statisticians posit that any husband reading this article, therefore, should check his phone immediately. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/oh-no-your-wife-has-sent-you-several-funny-videos-and-she-expects-you-to-watch-them

Senators Excited Thursday's Lunch Will Now Include Pudding With Their Strained Peas WASHINGTON, D.C. — Members of the Upper House shuffled excitedly down the hall on their way to lunch Thursday after hearing Congressional chefs were prepping something special in addition to their usual meal of strained peas and blended cube steak. [...] https://babylonbee.com/news/senators-excited-thursdays-lunch-will-now-include-pudding-with-their-strained-peas

Fynd enny mispelings or gramaticul errurs?

The security footage is his own private property. And yes, the country was really endangered by moving documents internally under 24/7 Secret Service protection.

Scintillating Thursday repartee, yawn man. ------- Thrilling Thursday report, see man: Mini-B. accepted our invitation to breakfast out, accepting wee man. However, he insisted on McDonald's, no coupons man. We paid over double what we'd have paid at BK WUOC, man. We have some financial edjm'caytin' to do with our offspring, man. We consumed "McGriddle" meals, inge$t Two Guy$ man. Lunch for Mini-B. was 2 PB&J sandwiches, ingest wee man. We were still full from breakfast and certainly still in financial shock, ingest nothing we man. Din-din was a first-time concoction, clever we man. Mini-B. minimally helped, distracted wee man. It was weenies & beans, Two Guys din-din man. We nuked all Many (2x2x2) -- si man, all Many (2x2x2) -- wieners in a wiener pack, nuke we man. We & Mini-B. sliced them, mostly we man. We opened one large can of baked beans, maple/bacon-flavored man. We opened one small can of regular baked beans, no particular flavor man. We dumped the equivalent of Many (2x2) sliced wieners into each of 2 bowls, take a dump we man. We dumped half the aggregated beans into each bowl, take another dump we man. We nuked each for warmth, warm concoction man. The initially dubious Mini-B. up-gobbled his, ingest wee man. We up-gobbled ours, ingest we man. We high-Many'd (high-[2+2+1]'d) afterward, superb Two Guys din-din man. Movie night was Smokey & the Bandit, outstanding man. Many (2+2+1) bowls of Costco popcorn were consumed, ingest Two Guys man. It was a great Two Guys day, satisfied Two Guys man. After Mini-B. zzz's, party with the rubias, cavort we man. We have itineraried 2 ESs, an MS, and a large church GS for Friday, itinerary we man. We can probably do this without offending Mini-B., predict we man.

Interesting. Comments? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Here's Why Joe Biden Can't Pardon His Son https://townhall.com/tipsheet/mattvespa/2023/07/27/bidens-in-case-of-fire-move-with-hunter-is-not-on-the-table-n2626319

I Couldn't Believe the Truth About Shoplifting It wasn't until just moments ago that I became aware of just how shockingly bad the shoplifting crime wave is — and I'm the former San Francisco resident who can't seem to stop writing about the city's long descent into criminality and accompanying economic decline. [...] https://pjmedia.com/vodkapundit/2023/07/27/i-couldnt-believe-the-truth-about-shoplifting-n1713826

Jill Biden's Ex-Husband Calls Joe Biden 'Very Dangerous,' Says the Biden Family Targeted Him On Wednesday, Bill Stevenson, the ex-husband of First Lady Jill Biden, blasted the "Biden crime family" and claimed that he and his family were targeted the same way Trump was. [...] https://pjmedia.com/uncategorized/matt-margolis/2023/07/27/jill-bidens-ex-husband-calls-joe-biden-very-dangerous-says-the-biden-family-targeted-him-n1714019

Captain Ewok said that he had a program to nuke them off the system. We'll have to revisit that.

Must be a function visible only to us highly paid Mods (annual salary = $0,000,000).

May they continue to bleed subscribers.

Speechless here. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WATCH: Whispering Aide Tells Sen. Dianne Feinstein to 'Just Say Aye' [...] This video of the event is unreal — almost beyond written description in its sinister creepiness. [...] https://pjmedia.com/news-and-politics/benbartee/2023/07/27/watch-whispering-aide-tells-sen-dianne-feinstein-to-just-say-aye-n1714063

San Francisco notices drugs are killing people Somebody tripped over one corpse too many, I guess, and decided it was time to talk a little tougher? [...] https://hotair.com/tree-hugging-sister/2023/07/27/san-francisco-notices-drugs-are-killing-people-n567524

Well this is embarrassing--Mexico warns citizens about DC crime It doesn't get much more embarrassing than this. The Mexican consulate is warning its citizens visiting Washington DC that crime has gotten so bad that they need to exercise special care. [...] https://hotair.com/david-strom/2023/07/27/well-this-is-embarrassing-mexico-warns-citizens-about-dc-crime-n567517

An overly confrontational post has been removed. Please temper the tendency to assault people who are under stress and post in this forum.

Flagged 70 (!). Gracias. As we see, they never posted and returned 1 time maximum, but not bad to flag. Could you see that a couple of them were already banned? Curious.

Did you read the article?

Mismanagement of upvote inventories/allocation! Reported!!!

If Yellow Freight goes under, it will be a sad loss. They've been around for so long and are familiar.

Far-Left Washington Post Set to Lose $100 Million This Year If that doesn't make your day, try this on for size: the far-left Washington Post has lost around 500,000 subscribers since 2020. That might sound too good to be true, but the news comes from another far-left propaganda outlet called the New York Times [...] https://www.breitbart.com/the-media/2023/07/26/nolte-far-left-washington-post-lose-100-million-this-year/

The Undumpable Biden Listening to Republican media pundits counting the days until the Dems abandon a scandal-ridden president, I have to wonder what kind of fantasy world these Pollyanna types inhabit. [...] https://amgreatness.com/2023/07/23/the-undumpable-biden/