laylalex

Tomorrow we are supposed to have our children and their families here to our house for a gathering and dinner.
My wife's daughter and husband and their two sons, 4 and 6 years old.  Coming over from Parkland near Ft Lauderdale.
My son and his wife and their two daughters, 3 and 5 years old.  Coming down from Jacksonville FL.
My daughter and her husband and their newborn twin girls, 3 1/2 weeks old. They live just under 15 minutes away.
 
3, 4, 5, 6 years old and 2 newborns.  Think I'll start drinking early and often.

There have been a many threads over the years. These are my thoughts and what I've read on here over the years.
 
 
First your fiance was supposed to be sure before he uprooted and moved you to the US. He even made a statement of just that.
It is always possible that when  together full time that reality sets in and that is fine and dandy but you don't get to toy with someone life like that. You get honest with them and end the relationship and let them go home. 
 
You've been here a month and he already has changed his mind.  Sure he says he doesn't want to break up but not ready to marry. It's not a try before yo buy visa he knew this full well. He's already telling you that he doesn't think he can make-up his mind in 50 days. Well too bad buddy he had nearly 2 years to make-up his mind and now all of a sudden he doesn't know. I call baloney he knew full well long before you came and was too chicken to tell you. 
 
You asked about getting married in 6 months. Does he expect you to stay in the US without any type of status and hoping he will marry you one day? While you are waiting for him you put yourself at risk for losing ESTA, getting a ban and even deportation.  These are all real possibilities that can happen to you, not him but you. He has no worries at all, he doesn't even have to support you and can even toss you out to the road with no repercussions. The risk for you is too great, pack up and go home long before your 90 days are up. If you have to convince him it is not worth it. 
 
If you decide not to give up on this relationship, go home and really really work on your relationship with him. He is the one who needs to step up not you. Let him prove to you he is ready, but make sure he isn't doing it because you are pushing him. 
 
 
As for others stories like this, you can find many on here. The USC changes his mind, something is not ready, too much work, and many other excuses. Sometimes they do get married like day 95 then no big deal life moves forward, but the majority of those couples, the USC doesn't start off saying they don't want to get married. Something out of their control or an emergency. 
 
 
Now this is truly the worst of the worse that I have seen on here.
 USC convinces the foreign fiance to stay, while draining the fiance's savings dry, boots fiance to the road after, fiance now has a ban for overstaying. 
 the abuse starts (no i'm not saying this is going to happen to you) without marriage the fiance also has no case for VAWA so they stay until they can't take it anymore or stays illegal always worried. If they leave they have incurred a ban. 
plays house making babies but never marry, kicks the other parent out, ugly custody battle begins, most are not lucky enough to leave with their child(ren) and then can't get back to the US to visit. Thanks to overstaying the 90 days. At the whims of the USC to talk,video chat with their child(ren). 
 
 
I'm also going to guess you have your own doubts about him moving forward to marry or you would not have been on here asking others their thoughts. Please follow your gut, it never lies. 
I also want to add you cannot come back later on with ESTA or a visitor visa to get married once you leave with the intent to adjust it doesn't work like that. He will have to start all over again with the spousal visa, 
 
 
 

I was munching on some Twiglets tonight, standing in the kitchen while he was in the living room watching TV. Like any self-respecting man, as soon the show got a little quiet and he could hear the rustle of a snack bag, he came scurrying in to see what I was snacking on. Practically slid in the room in his stocking feet, only to discover it was Twiglets (alas) and not the very nice Walkers Cheese & Onion crisps. He called me a heartless tease.  

I was munching on some Twiglets tonight, standing in the kitchen while he was in the living room watching TV. Like any self-respecting man, as soon the show got a little quiet and he could hear the rustle of a snack bag, he came scurrying in to see what I was snacking on. Practically slid in the room in his stocking feet, only to discover it was Twiglets (alas) and not the very nice Walkers Cheese & Onion crisps. He called me a heartless tease.  

We make our own sausages because I just couldn't find any I liked here and on the back of that I make Scotch eggs and sausage rolls and everyone around here begs me to make more.
 
Twiglets are what all the best people eat 😁😁😁

Not SUPER lightweight, but lightweight enough - check out Crate & Barrel.  I have a somewhat mid mod inspired wire frame one that I paid I think $16 for.  Simple. No lights. Just a star.  

Find some sparkly paper, paste it to cardboard, and cut out a star, LL ma'am.
Or, take cardboard cut into star shape, coat with glue, and sprinkle glitter on it, LL ma'am.
Cheap, creative, and you can make exactly what you want, LL ma'am.

We put in our order with British Corner Shop just before Thanksgiving. I started this annual tradition when I was married to my ex, also a Brit, who taught me that it is Very Important to have proper Xmas things to eat for a proper Xmas. So this year we got: 

 
Umm, somehow we also put in another order which is arriving on Friday.

 
I will stress that the first order was not solely for us -- I ordered a few things for others who have gotten hooked on certain UK food stuffs. 
 
I have never seen anything disappear as quickly before my eyes as that bag of prawn crackers in my husband's hands. I looked away to mess with my phone and when I looked back poof! Gone. Magic.

British Marmite and Aussie Vegemite...not the same (yes, I have tried both), but I think this Canuck will stick to Kraft peanut butter.  

Marmite?
 
On toast, you have Avocados. Of course you need Christmas crackers and a Angel on top of the tree.

No almond cakes were available! Trust me, I looked....
 
I had to go back for the second order because (apparently) Xmas is not Xmas without Xmas crackers. 
The lack of cordials is a regular topic of discussion at home. I can find Ribena in the supermarket, but that's about it. The other delicacies needed (Irn Bru, Scotch eggs) must be acquired in a specialty shop in Santa Monica. And no, just a jar of Branston pickle. The Twiglets and Marmite are for me, because (I am told) I have no taste buds.

We put in our order with British Corner Shop just before Thanksgiving. I started this annual tradition when I was married to my ex, also a Brit, who taught me that it is Very Important to have proper Xmas things to eat for a proper Xmas. So this year we got: 

 
Umm, somehow we also put in another order which is arriving on Friday.

 
I will stress that the first order was not solely for us -- I ordered a few things for others who have gotten hooked on certain UK food stuffs. 
 
I have never seen anything disappear as quickly before my eyes as that bag of prawn crackers in my husband's hands. I looked away to mess with my phone and when I looked back poof! Gone. Magic.

I don't know about the lemon cordial.  I'd go straight to the limoncello.

In the states, cordials are considered alcoholic beverages or types of chocolates, but in the UK they are non-alcoholic - a syrupy fruit juice with sparkling added. Though you can make them alcoholic - like a Cider & Black (alcoholic cider + blackcurrant juice cordial) or a type of snakebite. My great grandma used to make cordials and they were added to alcohol like a sort of mixer at parties. I would often debate with my husband if Martinelli's Sparkling Cider or Welch's is considered a type of cordial rather than just a non-alcoholic cider or wine, but we couldn't get a definite answer. You can get non-alcoholic cordial in the US, but they are like mixers right?
 
Layla, you got the kiplings mince pies but not the almond cakes? Man... I could eat a whole box of those right now.

https://www.britishcornershop.co.uk/?i=336546
 
It is that time of year and I have been here long enough to let most things go, obviously not HP sauce and the odd jar of Branston, but somehow I am more inclined to stock up now, Christmas Pudding, Mince Pies etc, and some decent chocolate of course.
 
Now the prices make me wince, probably because I am remembering prices from years ago.
 
So the link is above to the one I use, is there anything other people feel the need to special order? 
 
 

There are so very many reasons, but I wanted to share this moment from today:
 
The phone rang this afternoon around 3, and I saw his name on the screen. I got a little nervous -- we don't usually speak during the day, just chat online on and off all day long -- but when I picked up the phone he said:
 
"Hello, my sweetest. Don't say a word -- I just wanted to tell you how much I love you, perfect girl. Now go back to work and make more money."
 
Then he hung up.
 
❤️ He's the best.

Sarper and Shakinah are now running a concierge service for people who want to get cosmetic surgery/dentistry done in Turkey. I mean... look. They are not exactly the best ambassadors for plastic surgery, but it's not a bad business idea. There are always going to be people who want to get work done there but feel overwhelmed or confused about how to do that, and having two people familiar with the process and all the various hoops lead the way seems like a useful service.
 
I mean, at least it's not OnlyFans!  

Sarper and Shakinah are now running a concierge service for people who want to get cosmetic surgery/dentistry done in Turkey. I mean... look. They are not exactly the best ambassadors for plastic surgery, but it's not a bad business idea. There are always going to be people who want to get work done there but feel overwhelmed or confused about how to do that, and having two people familiar with the process and all the various hoops lead the way seems like a useful service.
 
I mean, at least it's not OnlyFans!  

Sarper and Shakinah are now running a concierge service for people who want to get cosmetic surgery/dentistry done in Turkey. I mean... look. They are not exactly the best ambassadors for plastic surgery, but it's not a bad business idea. There are always going to be people who want to get work done there but feel overwhelmed or confused about how to do that, and having two people familiar with the process and all the various hoops lead the way seems like a useful service.
 
I mean, at least it's not OnlyFans!  

So apparently Sarper has a son that was conceived with a Russian woman when he was 19 years old and she was 34. Said woman told him she didn't expect anything from him and would raise the child. Well now Sarper wants to find his son, also he wants a baby with Shekinah.
I honestly think this twist in the plot of their storyline is just a way to keep it going. Because if he is searching for his son that means more screen time. In a couple other forms I've read people believe the same.
I have a really hard time looking at him, he seems so plastic and his eyes look kind of psychotic. Not to mention the shirt unbuttoned to the navel all the time 🤮

She said in the Last Resort that it really had been her father leaning on her to stay in the marriage. I wonder what Papa Kalani/Kolini will say about his son-in-law now. 
 
There have been some real winners on 90 Day: Geoffrey, now in prison for assault and kidnapping; Paul, whose depravity seems to know no bottom (p0rn with your brother-in-law??), and Karine hardly better; gross gross gross Mike who acted like he bought Ximena (who was not a winner either) and showed up with poop on his shoes, basically demanding sex from her; Pao, who has emotionally bullied Russ from day one; that Russian little person who turned out to be a racist and had her story ended early, leading to her being known online as "the littlest Klansman"... and those are just the most egregious ones. 
 
And I can't stop watching.  Just super excited for Closet Mom to finally show up tomorrow.

Everything you said here! One of the things not mentioned during the Last Resort by Kalani is something she dropped on her IG. (No, I don't follow her on there but I do read the subreddit for 90Day because... reasons.) TW for SA.
 
Kalani said Asuelu held her down and forced her to have sez. This assault, she says, resulted in her second child. This was not the only time he assaulted her. But I guess she felt she had to stay with him for the sake of the kids, even though he was an admitted cheater and (allegedly) assaulted her. Just papering over and papering over and hoping for the best in the face of absolute wretchedness.
 
I'm glad she got out. We can laugh at how ridiculous a lot of these people are, but some of them have real problems. I hope Kalani has fun with her boy toy and then takes some time to heal on her own. 

Wow that's very disturbing about Asuelo's behavior and supposed assault on Kalani more than once. No wonder Koloni couldn't stand him. 

Thanks for the heads up.

FYI beauty lovers -- the Sephora sale is over on Monday 11/6 so hurry up! Everyone gets at least 10% off, and if you are a pathetic beauty monster like me and are a Rouge member, 20%. 30% on all Sephora brand items too.