I usually don't respond to this type of topic, because what goes on someone's heart is very unique and we dont and we will never live their lives and feel their feelings, but I have to respond to this one...
I think some people here took it, I would say not personally, but as a "nationality" problem.. come on people, how old are yall?
No one here is saying that people from this or that country are this and this and that... bla bla bla... just a bunch of bla bla bla!!! This topic is not to prove who yall are, how good or bad people from yalls country are from, this is a topic made to give opinions about what some HUMAN BEING is feeling. This is not about YOU. Its about her. Go prove your husband or wife who you are. No one here pays your bills but them. Or wipe your @ss, as it was said... who gives a $#@%#$ to who wipes your #### or do whatever to you? I dont care. But it is a womans heart out there needing some advice. She doesnt want to know who cleans your bathroom or your $%#$!!
About God.... Does God want us to be unhappy? Does God want (really) us to be in a marriage that we are not happy? Does God want us, woman or man, to be hurt inside just to make someone satisfied? What about our satisfaction? God doesnt think about our satisfaction? HE DOES! He wants us to be happy... all of us. It does not depend of country of origin or religion, God is one, and he wants all of us to be happy. Does God wants a woman or a man to submit to their loved ones, when the "loved" one treats them like #######?? We are not playing God here... Let God decide what he wants, you dont have the power to decide what God wants.
This is about her heart, and what she feels, we will never understand. People feel different. People are brought to different cultures and were raised different. My mother wakes up everyday at 5am to go to work and comes back at 8pm, and my dad washes clothes, washes the dishes, takes care of my sister because he works less than her. And she does help him when she can help him. Some man would never do it. Some woman would never work as hard as my mom does, because we all are different.
The answer to your question, is inside your heart. What I can say is what I would do, but different things work for different people. I love my dog as she was my own daughter, and I say that she just didnt came out of me (and some of yall might think I am retarted). I would never accept someone that would threaten her. I am not the type of woman that will sit at home and clean the whole day. I need to do other things, and it doesnt mean that i am a pig... I clean my house, do my stuff but sometimes i dont want to clean dishes... does it make me less of a woman than those that dont clean and do nothing all day while I work from 7 to 7 and get home tired as hell?
I am the better wife i can be. And you are too, on your own way, i am sure of that. But you have to ask yourself if you are ready to give up on some little things for someone. If the answer is "no", I would re-think about the marriage. Are you willling to put up with some of his habits, and try to understand his reasons to do somw of the things he does? If you have doubt of it, I would again, re-think the whole marriage thing. You are not gonna go to hell if you get divorced, and I am sure God wants you to be happy... married to him or not.
But about the sex thing... this is very personal. He needs to understand that you might not want anything at that time... And remember those who said that you have to "do it" as many times as he wants - in heaven there is no sex... you are a human being that wants things or not, and those are your feelings. So he needs to respect that. you are not a sex machine. But everybody will have different views of the same thing. You, in the other hand has to respect his wishes also, and find a gap where yall can work it out and make it good for both.
From the bottom of my heart, I hope you can figure out what to do and go for your happiness. Yourt happiness is not in anyones hand ot in any marriage or anything. Whatever works out for you, whatever makes you happy, do it. Life is just too short to be losing time.
If you decide to leave him, take all these things you learned and make it better, make it as a lesson that you have learned and use when you have to.
No women and no men should "submitt" theirselves to anyone. You can be married, but you are one person, he is another. You see with your eyes and breathe with your own lungs and at some point yall decided to be together and do things as one, feel as one, and live as one... but you guys are still different, have independent thoughts and that doesnt mean that you love more or less, or your marriage is better or worse than any other person here.
I respect my husband as one individual and also does he. I know we wont agree in some things, will think different about other things, and that doesnt mean we hate each other or we are not like husband and wife should be. It means that we respect each others differences because we chose to live as one, but we are still individuals.
Now, talk to your heart. Thats what I would do. Think of all the possibilities and opportunities that you might have in your life, with him and without him. See whats best for you, what excites you more about the future. Then decide. Ask God to talk to your heart. He wants you to be happy and so does some of the people here.
As this other ones here that are talking about submission, or "you got married now live with it"... they just made one more person in this world laugh about them, and think that they are so funny, that its not even funny... One more person thinks that you, person, that says that you have to submit as a robot and do whatever your man says and be unhappy and all those things that makes no sense, is very very .... yeah... I wont even say anything. It doesnt deserve a comment.
And yes, YALL dont mess with texas!
Wish you guys all the best, always. And I am sorry for the "bible". Too long, but I hope someone can find something in my words withmy poor english... In the end, we are all the same to God and I really wish all of you here the best.
From my brazilian heart....
Hugs!!
(and i am sorry of i wrote too many things wrong)
Ana Paula got a reaction from user19000 in want to send her home while i can