Villanelle

@EmptySeats 
 
What valid documents do you currently have? I think the part you are getting stuck on is the fact that certain things are only valid for certain period of times. So whats true one day (when something is valid) can be impossible the next day when the doc is no longer valid.
 
A few things to consider. Each state handles their DMV stuff their own way. Every DMV (or BMV or MVC or whatever they call it in that state) but every one in the state should follow the same guidelines. Some offices are better at understanding the guidelines and more helpful then others. There is also something known as Real ID. Thats a federal program thanks to Homeland Security thats been around since early 2000s I think. I believe they are pushing to have Real ID required for everyone in every state by the end of 2021. The 'Real ID' has stricter universal guidelines of what you need to show to get one issued and eventually you are suppose to be required to have one to fly domestically. Some states are doing Real IDs only. Some do a combo of Real ID and regular drivers licenses and are campaigning to encourage those with standard licenses to switch to Real ID. Other states like CA have additional programs for those with no status to get DLs! 
 
I believe NJ does both Real IDs and standard DLs.  Its common for those w/o GCs (but have status) to get limited term DLs. The expiration on the DL is usually matched to the dates on your valid status. So in the scenario you described above (getting the DL or permit with the K) would have allowed them to issue her a DL/permit but it would have expired when the i94 did. Some states do not issue limited term DLs if you have 6 months or less of time left, some do. 
 
Your problem right now is similar to those who didnt get their SSN issued before the i94 expires. Its related to the SAVE system. The SAVE system is what agencies use to verify ones immigration status. When you come on the K you get the i94 for 90 days. For those 90 days you are valid in the SAVE system. Once your i94 expires you are NOT. You are considered to be in a 'period of auth stay' which is not a legal status. Its a limbo period in which you have petitions to adjust status pending so they allow you to stay but they dont give you any kind of status. Its an awkward situation and no one really cares enough to change it because it doesnt impact enough people to matter to most. 
 
Once you submit your AOS package you get the NOA. Some agencies will accept the NOA but most will not because as I said the NOA does not 'activate you' in the SAVE system. When your EAD is issued you are updated in the SAVE system. If your wife filled out her AOS package using your last name as her new name her EAD will be issued in the new name and entered into the SAVE system. She can bring her EAD and use that to get the DL. (the petition for the EAD is the 765, the actual EAD card is the 766 so when you look at the requirements keep that in mind. EAD card=766, GC=551) Her DL expiration term may be linked to her EAD validity so 1 year. If she does not have her GC by then she can renew her DL with the EAD extension.  
 
I know I wrote a lot of stuff that is just general information for context- the main point is as a K one has valid status from when they enter until the i94 expires. They then are in a period of auth stay (no official status), and then once the EAD is issued they are considered to have valid status (EAD holder) and will be active in the SAVE system as such. And then when the GC is finally issued they will be considered to have active valid status in the SAVE system as a 551 GC holder. 
 

So the first thing you want to do is sit down and write out everything you can remember being asked and the answers given. Have your wife do the same separately so you don't influence each others recollection. Do this asap as memories fade and can be unreliable in general. You can make notes as well as to the tone or attitude you perceived as well. 
 
Now regarding the waiver it's not as big a deal as it seems. It's just costly as you need an attorney to prepare it. I know it may seem overwhelming to establish 'hardship' when its Canada but most waivers are approved IF the attorney or self preparer knows how and what to write.  Yes, it can be a hardship if you have 2 USC children and a stay at home wife. An experienced attorney can make it work. 
 
I would also suggest reading through some of the guidelines for drug use and inadmissibility. Some resources online are long winded policy and others are reader friendly blog type explanations by attorneys or legal groups.
 
Now a few things you seem to be confused about. There is no sworn statement about not using drugs, that's not how it works. You can also find information about drugs in the medical guidance from CDC. 
 
When it comes to drugs it's a 2 fold issue. One is the criminal aspect the other is a health aspect. 
 
Only the panel physician/ civil surgeon can make the determination if you are a drug user (which makes you medically ineligible).  They do this by asking questions in the medical and if needed sending you for drug testing and or a psych evaluation. 
 
So question 1- did you disclose at the medical the drug use? If so and your medical was approved it was determined you have no drug issue preventing you from receiving the visa. If you can't remember you can attempt to contact whoever did your medical. Im not sure if they would give you a copy of it but they may be able to give you information contained in it in some fashion.  If you didn't disclose the drug use in the medical that could be the issue now. 
 
Another thing that stands out in your post is how you said "I admitted to marijuana use and being arrested once for assault, all in my home country." It is not clear if you disclosed (admitted) to drug use or a drug charge/crime. You said you paid a 70$ fine which means criminal element was involved, different from admitting to simply using it. This could be the issue as well. 
 
Both of these scenarios should be able to be handled by an attorney with experience but in different specific ways. So yes, it is going to be important to have an attorney with you who has an understanding of the overall situation and can make sure you don't put your foot in your mouth answering questions making things worse. Or possibly clarify something you might have said already that triggered you down this path providing that's what happened. 
 
You also mentioned the last time you used marijuana was 2006 2007. That's not 20 years ago. You also said I have no drug related charges which umm isn't a ticket for 70$ a drug charge? It wasn't 70$ for littering because you tossed the stub on the floor when you were done right? 
 
They also may ask for an updated medical which you shouldn't have any issue getting. This is another cost to you though. 
 
If you have to do the waiver it can take 6months to a year for it to be processed. The only good news is most likely you will be past 2 years of marriage by the time the GC is approved so no ROC. You will definitely spend more money on waiver fees then ROC would've cost but it does help offset the total cost. You also will have a longer wait for Naturalization as you need to be a GC holder for 3yrs and that clock doesn't start until the card is actually issued.  
 
Make sure to submit your EAD renewal as early as you can as you probably will be needing it for a while if this isn't resolved in the upcoming interview with the attorney. 
 
You can use your states bar association website to find an attorney. You want one who is familiar with inadmissibility/waivers and Canada specifically. 

Do you have any idea why? Still married? Difficult interview? Fraud suspicion? Background checks? Etc
 
WOM (writ of mamandus) is something to discuss with an attorney familiar with your case. It doesn't automatically force an approval just a decision.  
 
 

FYI - ICE does not handle single marriage fraud issues. They do handle  marriage fraud rings. This is not to say ICE wouldn't be involved just that suggesting the OPs fraud report would result in an armed raid is a bit fear mongering. 
 
Investigations into singular marriage fraud cases are done by the FDNS officers. You can send a letter attn FDNS via local office. A copy should also be sent to the service center. 

This ^^ this is how the family court typically views it. A parent can be a criminal yet family court still takes the position that nothing is more important than the parental relationship. If the parent is a violent offender the visits may be supervised. Visitation typically remains until a child becomes old enough (14 or so) to express their wishes for consideration. 
 
The OP can bring the matter up in family court but I would recommend using an attorney to do so and keeping expectations low. Best outcome would be along the lines of supervised limited visitation and perhaps changing custody order to remove moms ability to make decisions (physical custody is difficult than decision making rights).
 
OP can also report the fraud to the local office by sending a letter to them (attn FDNS) and a copy to the service center.  
Yes and no. Mom is behaving badly. Of course you should protect your children but that doesn't necessarily mean a total disconnect. Supervised interactions. Allow the relationship, just ensure it's proper. 

This is a complicated issue policy wise which is why you are not getting very many responses back on that, just responses back based on the personal relationship but its very much intertwined.
Policy wise there are a few memos about ROC and divorce/separation- I can dig up the links but they are so wordy most people read them and are still left confused. There have been various couples throughout the forums that have been in different situations where the memos applied (filed jointly- then separated- went to interview together, went alone) I mean just so many variables.
No ones ever presented a situation like this. But using the memos, the how the actual couples above played out, some common sense about the process I can give you my best educated guess of how I think they would apply policy to your situation and view it...
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First the ROC is based on the entire marriage, not just from when you got the GC until you divorced. You stated in your other post that you were married for a long time before getting the card and then something like a few months after you separated/divorced. It does look suspicious when you seperate soon after getting the card, as if you only stayed for the card. A clearer timeline would be helpful. Something like we were married for a year before applying for the visa, the process took 9 months when I entered and got the conditional card, 7 months later we separated. (thats different then a quick marriage, quick entry, quick divorce). So you want to submit evidence from the whole marriage.
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Why your lawyer wants you to wait to file? I dont know. Is it an immigration lawyer? Sometimes they recommend waiting if you have weak evidence because the older it gets, well in some ways the better it gets. Its harder for them to track people down that mightve known you as a couple. Things become outdated etc./
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This is an odd question. First if you get married at any point between submitting your ROC and it getting approved they will probably find out - especially if you get called for an interview. So rephrasing it to remarried after 10yr card received- she can help with your waiver filing by writing a letter. No special form is needed, she can have it notarized if she wants. But you need to be careful when submitting something like that. It all comes down to trust.
When YOU submit something from somebody with your ROC packet like that you are giving them authorization to contact the person to verify the contents. They can contact them by phone, inperson, call them in for an interview. If you dont trust her- you dont know what she can say- that you forced her to write it? that it was all a scam? She can make a lot of trouble for you.
Of course they can contact people on their own, but in your other thread someone mentioned credible evidence and the weight different things are given. Its a totally different ball game when you offer something up to them. If you have doubts about the person you should not offer them up.
If she has documents that can help you- sure great. Paperwork you dont have that you can use- ask for it and use it in your packet if it fits in.
Honestly and this is a tricky one. I believe even if you dont marry again you could file jointly. I say this based on the couples who were in separation and filed jointly and were allowed to let the joint petition stand because both parties supported it. But again this comes down to trust. Youve mentioned repeatedly you have no trust in her.
Would it effect the petition if you divorced and then remarried right before ROC. IMO YES a big fat YES. It would look like you guys dont understand immigration law and thought you needed to be married for you to keep the card so you did. You would have a big hurdle to face to show that you are married in good faith both times. You would have a tough interview. And again a lot of trust in her to get through it, which you do not have.
The waiver tic box is there for a reason. Its for people who are divorced so they can file on their own with out the support of the USC because they are divorced and dont have the support of the USC any more. Even in an amicable divorce I would not recommend some one to joint file because it looks suspicious like the USC is trying to help them gain benefits.
The few people that did do that were in situations where the ROC was happening and they were making immediate life choices separate- stay together- I dont know what we should do, and filed together. They were honest and filed jointly and honest at the interview and it worked out. Thats not you.
You need to explain to her that you need to complete the ROC process on your own now that you are divorced. Period. You cant remarry while its pending. Period. If she doesnt like it- oh well. She initiated the divorce, these are the consequences. You guys can date during it- thats it.
Dont take a chance messing up your future to bow to her whims. Unless of course you have tons of money and are prepared to go through denials and long battles in immigration appeals courts for the next several years. Or you are interested in returning to Australia and she would like to join you there.

Okay- so you are right, if there is NO DIVORCE and you refuse to sign the forms she doesnt qualify (she doesnt meet VAWA, hardship etc)
However the part you are missing which several people have expressed (not directly) is the following:
Divorce can be initiated by EITHER party in the marriage. There is no such thing as one spouse stating I dont want it so its not going to happen. No one is required to be married to someone they dont wish to be. It doesnt matter if both parties agree to the divorce, once it is initiated (by either spouse) it is going to happen.
So if you do not initiate the divorce- what will happen is once your spouse realizes you wont be filing for removal jointly (signing the forms) she will be forced to initiate the divorce (if she wants to ROC). USCIS has procedures for situations like this. She will file for divorce and submit them proof the divorce is pending but not approved yet. Basically they will accept that proof and delay making a decision on her ROC until the divorce is final. She may end up going to Immigration court to ask for such an extension. Its complicated but there are provisions for it.
There is nothing you can do to stop her from initiating the divorce nor stop the divorce from happening. Period.
On a side note I believe in PA there is a mandatory 12 month separation period before a divorce can occur. Your choice is whether you want to initiate divorce proceedings NOW (because you know the marriage is over) OR wait for her. She will then decide to initiate them so she can ROC or she may decide she doesnt want to be an LPR anymore and still file for divorce but leave the country rather then applying. The decision to apply or leave is going to be up to her. There is nothing you can do to affect this beyond having conversations and stressing to her your desire to have her leave and the pros of a pro/con list of doing so.

I can not believe how this thread has progressed. I feel like I should apologize to the OP for the unacceptable tone in this thread and am considering advising her to post in the VAWA megathread, even though she is not a VAWA case. But it appears to be the only place on VJ that is moderated to support victims of abuse rather than interrogate them.
 
Again there is nothing in the law that states she was required to come to the US to be with the husband. And before everyone tears apart that awkwardly worded sentence- the ir visa requires you to first have the US citizen or LPR file the 130 establishing the relationship. There is then the interview at the Embassy in which a decision is made and the visa issued.  Thats it. There is no follow-up determination. There are no requirements to live with your spouse. 
 
For the CR one would have to file ROC. But as we all know divorce is not a reason for ROC denial, hence the routinely approved divorce waiver filings. 
 
People here are getting caught up in the idea that her entering on the visa, which was properly approved and issued, must be wrong because morally they disagree with it. 
 
Again the visa was issued properly. There no fine print stating what you must do afterwards. It doesn't get revoked if things changed between it being issued or endorsed at POE. It can be stopped during that period if the petitioner requested such, but it wasn't. The relationship does NOT need to still be intact at POE. Im sorry if people disagree with such but thats how it is. 
 
I understand people think they are trying to help by connecting dots in a devils advocate fashion to show how a case 'could be' brought against her. But thats not how it works. The 'dots' being used are N/A. And then the comments suggesting she better not get involved in a new relationship! Wow.
 
Dig through the forums and find the postings by the user kkk1. He had a very similar story. He entered on an IR. Never lived with his spouse. Has since remarried and obtained citizenship with zero issue. He still checks in with the forums with updates and to express his gratitude for the support he received,  although under a new user name. 
 
This whole idea that the OP has done something wrong is very disheartening to read. Things change. She didn't obtain the visa under false pretenses. And this whole idea that well we don't know that, and it looks suspicious is nonsense.  Separation or divorce after the benefit was issued can be an indicator of bad intentions but it is not enough on it's own.  You all know this. So what else is there that could be considered 'a dot' to connect. 
 
She seems to have ample evidence of it being an unhealthy relationship. And this thread reads as people saying well you knew it was bad so you must have intentionally stayed for the benefits. Textbook victim blaming.  Its appalling.  

File for divorce asap and seek a separate restraining order for the harassment if he continues it. 

There are many threads I can point you to if needed.  Filing a fraud complaint is incredibly difficult, even for those who are legitimate victims of fraud. USCIS is well aware of 'bitter ex spouse syndrome'. They don't even pretend to entertain it. But lets say some how he comes up with an incredible story (and it has to be more than just my spouse left me, we're talking hard evidences of criminal behavior). They will investigate. Thoroughly.  A case would have to be presented to an immigration judge. The process with the court would take years. You would have numerous opportunities to defend yourself.  
 
He should be more scared of you actually. You are entitled to sue him based on the 864 he signed. He would be ordered to pay you apx 1k per month to keep you above the poverty guidelines perhaps indefinitely if you don't become a citizen. 

He can complain all he wants. USCIS has a special filing location for such complaints, its called the trash. 
 
Unless you actually committed fraud you have nothing to worry about. 

Okay so 'fair to him to walk away from the situation'... but the way Im reading it he didnt walk away. He said 'You should have seen her look when she opened her letter last night' and referenced the children crying.
That to me reads as if they are all still living together... I mean is it just me or am I inferring too much?
So thats not walking away. Thats not finding out you were the victim of a scam and closing the chapter and moving on/filing for divorce etc. Thats him taking a passive aggressive approach. Thats him basically saying I choose to stand here and do nothing and let things fall apart/play out all around me. My unsolicited advice- drop the passive part.

Hmm well I kinda agree with some of what @Jesserose24 is saying (or trying to say). I get the outrage many have expressed here, but it's not that hard to imagine a conversation where they determined she didn't have immigrant intent at the present time of entry.
 
Yes absolutely you are allowed to 'tie up loose ends' after you enter and activate the visa. But there's a difference between tying loose ends and not being ready to move.
 
It seems there was discussion about going to look at properties for the couple to move into together. So if the questioning went along the lines of where are you going to be living (in the US) and the response was Im not,  we are going to be looking for houses the next few weeks because we are not ready, and I still have my job and stuff to deal with in Canada- then yeah she shouldn't enter on the IR visa. 
 
The request for certain things to establish her immigrant intent are specific to her based on what she said at POE (or what they interpreted it as) and should not be viewed as anything more.
 
I think the main takeaway here is words matter. It's not enough to simply know what to say but to understand why you need to say it a certain way. Some times people get so caught up in thinking they know the regulations so well that there's no way it could go wrong. I believe in the first post the OP said something where he called his wife stupid for not activating the visa immediately after getting it. So they obviously had different viewpoints on the matter and she probably presented herself in a 'not ready ' way because I think honestly she wasn't ready and was attempting to enter with it because the OP insisted she should as all the concerns she had about loose ends could have been handled by her as an LPR. 

USCIS doesn't make the laws, congress does. So why does Congress oppose it? Because it's not fair and yes, Congress does care about making laws that are fair and just and follow the concepts our nation was built upon as well as current POV of the general public.
 
The flow of immigration in and out of any nation is a complex topic that I'm sure you can find many published opinions on online if you are inclined.

Hmm well I kinda agree with some of what @Jesserose24 is saying (or trying to say). I get the outrage many have expressed here, but it's not that hard to imagine a conversation where they determined she didn't have immigrant intent at the present time of entry.
 
Yes absolutely you are allowed to 'tie up loose ends' after you enter and activate the visa. But there's a difference between tying loose ends and not being ready to move.
 
It seems there was discussion about going to look at properties for the couple to move into together. So if the questioning went along the lines of where are you going to be living (in the US) and the response was Im not,  we are going to be looking for houses the next few weeks because we are not ready, and I still have my job and stuff to deal with in Canada- then yeah she shouldn't enter on the IR visa. 
 
The request for certain things to establish her immigrant intent are specific to her based on what she said at POE (or what they interpreted it as) and should not be viewed as anything more.
 
I think the main takeaway here is words matter. It's not enough to simply know what to say but to understand why you need to say it a certain way. Some times people get so caught up in thinking they know the regulations so well that there's no way it could go wrong. I believe in the first post the OP said something where he called his wife stupid for not activating the visa immediately after getting it. So they obviously had different viewpoints on the matter and she probably presented herself in a 'not ready ' way because I think honestly she wasn't ready and was attempting to enter with it because the OP insisted she should as all the concerns she had about loose ends could have been handled by her as an LPR. 

https://www.uscis.gov/green-card/after-we-grant-your-green-card/conditional-permanent-residence/removing-conditions-on-permanent-residence-based-on-marriage
 
Click to expand the heading If you are in Divorce Proceedings but are not yet Divorced.
 
If you are still married, but legally separated and/or in pending divorce or annulment proceedings, and you filed a Form I-751 jointly, we will issue an RFE specifically asking for a copy of the final divorce decree or annulment and a statement that you would like to have your joint filing Form I-751 treated as a waiver.
 
 
How exactly do you think they would know divorce was officially filed or a couple chose to separate with out filing (moves out and in with new partners) except for the fact of you telling them? 
 
Side note the paragraph I quoted above is the second paragraph under the header. The first starts with if you are still married and divorce pending and you filed a waiver etc etc. 
 
So this idea that there is no guidance is not entirely accurate. I am also uncomfortable with the concept of avoiding difficult paths because as we all know everyones immigration path is different. Some are harder than others. Yes, advising them of the divorce would have caused them to RFE for the decree. You don't have it yet? IT'S OKAY, seriously its ok. They don't deny you then and there. 
 
The 751 form is unique and there are various steps to processing denials. The only swift removal of status occurs for those who fail to file as USCIS takes the position oh I guess you don't want your card anymore since you failed to file. 
 
So when the RFE comes back with a sorry I don't have the decree, you are scheduled for an interview.  Still don't have it? Well that's a shame but USCIS can't hold your case forever.  They have to deny it and send it to the court. Now theres a huge difference between a denial from USCIS for the 751 and an immigration judge ruling such.
 
Uscis denial is meaningless! They do not have the authority to strip your status. All their denial means is they couldn't adjudicate your form because you don't have the right paperwork. 
 
The judge on the other hand has the opposite authority. The judge can remove your status but the judge can not adjudicate 751s! (crazy but true). The judge can and will hold your case until you get your decree (which if you are using the waiver you need), or you can be adjudicated on  a joint 751 if both you and your soon to be ex desire such. But if you were choosing to remain on the joint you would have advised them of such when they asked you for the decree. Circling us back to why they asked for the decree (cause you would have notified them of pending divorce) Notifying them of a divorce when a joint was filed does not automatically switch you to a waiver. One spouse requesting to be removed from the joint typically causes it to be switched but can also result in a denial instead if they are so inclined. 
 
In some places divorce can have a mandatory 1-2 yr separation period.  And not everyone wants to remain on a joint petition.
 
But like I said people shouldn't avoid a path simply because its more difficult. No where no when no how is it ever is it a good idea to 'keep quiet' regarding what you disclose to immigration. Sorry,  I just can't agree with that. Not that the OP or anyone specifically said such, its just some of this thread reads with that sentiment..
 
 
 
 

I am sorry this happened to you. You did the right thing by refusing to volunteer any information. Its very important to NEVER- NEVER EVER give someone calling you any personal info like confirming DOB or SSN or A#. Any one calling from a legitimate agency or office will give you their contact # (which you verify before dialing it back) and their ID#/ full name (which again you can verify when calling back). Unfortunately there are often data breaches in which scammers buy a list of names and phone numbers and then 'go fishing'. They either attempt to gather additional info from you like SSNs to then use for identity theft or fraud -or- the phone call suddenly turns into- 'I can make this go away if you pay a 'fine' of X dollars, give me your credit card number or even worse- buy a prepaid card and give me the numbers off it.' !!!! 🙄 It seems somehow you got on this list so I would suggest doing a basic security check - change passwords, scan your devices for malware, etc. You can also report the call to the FCC- https://www.fcc.gov/spoofing They also have general info on how to avoid being a victim of a spoofed call.

http://www.visajourney.com/examples/INS-Form-I-485.pdf

Doesn't apply. The FDCA fair debt collection act says no more than 25% aggregate disposable earnings.  Alimony-child support is 50 - 60 %. The 864 is technically neither. So its in a grey area, the wild west of no rules technically apply.  Most of the guidance for it is based on the precedents set as cases are ruled upon. And if that's not bad enough , the district courts that handle these cases at the federal level don't always agree. So where its filed can matter.  
 
One can find additional info online at 864.net or sound immigration has a few articles summarizing highlights. Its a rabbit hole you may regret going down. 
 
The 864 can be handled by the family court during divorce proceedings or if not handled by the federal court. Some family courts will not get involved with it as they don't really understand it. Which is why it's recommended to try to slip it into the divorce at family court. Theoretically will prevent the federal court from taking the case as it was ruled on already. 
 
Is that a sneaky underhanded way of dealing with it? Eh, IDK. I believe its best to have a fair divorce in which each side is left with enough footing to be able to move forward alone. If this means the primary earner has a few years of things being tight then so be it. Its only temporary. The 864 can be permanent. 
 
And man some of the court cases at the federal level are outrageous. Some districts don't require the immigrant to even seek work or make an attempt to get themselves above guidelines. Lots of people attempting to hide assets in order to keep collecting. Having a friend or family member provide support in a roundabout way so they can still collect from the sponsor.  Is that fair? Greed is a powerful emotion.  
 

You answered your own question. 
 
What does the g1145 enable you to do? The e-notification does not grant any type of status or benefit, rather it is provided as a convenience to customers.  
 
The online system is a courtesy and has various disclaimers about how its simply a courtesy, may be inaccurate, but most importantly does not grant any benefit. 

Typically people receive the NOA within 30 days. Yes, it says 10 days but read carefully. See how it says 'accepted'? Accepted doesn't mean when your package is delivered. You are not the only one sending mail to them. So your package will be received by the mail room and be processed. This means they check for things like signatures, all fields completed (not evaluating the content they are just the mail room-  but rather to ensure the Officers who ultimately get the package have an application they can adjudicate), they check for correct payment, etc. Think of it like a pre-screening.  Once they are done your package is either accepted and put in line to go to an Officer or rejected and sent back to you. The NOA will be sent with in 10 days and then it's in USPS hands.. Sometimes people have problems with the post office not delivering mail in a new name /person to their address. 
 
And yes, I thought it was pretty clear but @Lil bear said it better "No CBP/ICE Officer has a duty to “ look into the filing record of the detained person”. ".Again this can be a hard concept for citizens to grasp as we are accustomed to the burden being on 'them' to prove you are doing something wrong to prosecute you. Immigration is backwards. You must prove to them and they have no problem holding you until you do so. It's actually their job!! Aliens are specifically told they need to carry proof of status on them at all times to present upon demand. 

@lovinglive
 
I don't really understand your reluctance to answer questions users are asking. No one has asked for sensitive/extremely private information. There are ways to answer while still maintaining your privacy. And you can always ask the mods to edit out anything you may have posted if you later feel uncomfortable with how much you disclosed publicly. 
 
As others have explained often people ask questions with tunnel vision. They don't realize they are asking the wrong questions and specifics matter. One small detail can make a huge impact. 
 
But regardless,  you do realize there are a significant number of people w/o status in the US. Many can go for years,decades even never encountering issues. There are also people who aren't so lucky! The advice of plan for the worst case scenario is good advice. 
 
The worst case scenario here involves your partner being detained. This is not a clear cut users can walk you through step by step what would happen as yes, there is policy guidance but it also involves a lot of discretion by the Officers involved. It's almost like if you asked what happens if I am stopped by the cops for speeding? Will I get a ticket? Will I be able to get it reduced in court? No one can say. We can tell you the laws and what should happen but that doesn't mean it will play out that way..
 
Your partner is on a B visa. Until you marry your partner is an alien with no qualifying relatives (I assume unless she has other family here). An alien with no qualifying relatives on an expired B visa will have a variety problems if 'caught'. All can be generally resolved if you were to marry and file the appropriate paperwork but it will be costly and time consuming. Not really a path you should take. 
 
Once married the alien does have a qr (qualifying relative), but the marriage itself does not confer benefits . You must file the paperwork for such. So if the alien is 'caught' prior to it being filed there will be a variety of issues. Again they can all be resolved but your goal should be avoiding them. 
 
To avoid issues you need to file the AOS package (which you need to be married to do). Once it's accepted by USCIS the auth stay takes effect. However you will NOT have proof of such until you receive the NOA in the mail for it. This is where discretion comes in to play. The Officers can see what you filed but what most USCs have a hard time understanding is the immigration system has a guilty until proven innocent set up.  And its your burden not theirs! You should not expect them to look into the system and determine auth stay applies, because while they can they probably won't.  You claim to have auth stay you need to show them and the NOA is the documentation you need. 
 
Detention centers are not known for being pleasant rather the opposite. So if this urgent need for travel is because of a 'fun' trip that has already been planned and paid for (odd to have made such plans for a period of time they had no auth to be here for), well the fun trip will no longer be fun if detained and you will both be asking afterwards if it was worth it. Most likely it wasn't.  Or it can impact the relationship if the alien is uncomfortable but you pushed them because that's all they will be thinking about in detention. Traveling or remaining with no status or auth needs to be the aliens decision. 
 
There are a few posts from users who were detained on VJ you all can read through as well as on the internet in general. I would suggest you do such. 

For a Real ID - https://dmv.stg.colorado.gov/sites/dmv/files/DR2300A.pdf. You should be able to use passport under step 1, SS card as step 2, and whatever you have for step 3. In itself that appears to be enough to issue you the DL in your married name. But step 4 may be where they give you a hard time because you currently have a DL with another name, so you would need to do step 4- a court ordered name change. 
 
Typically that costs 200$ or less and is a rather quick process. You go down to the clerk and fill out a name change form, it gets published various places, and then the Judge will approve the name change. You are then issued a legal name change document which can be used at DMV/SSA/passports etc, although all you really need it for is DMV it seems.... https://www.courts.state.co.us/Forms/PDF/JDF 432 Instructions for Name Change - Adult.pdf Please make sure when applying for the name change this way they understand it is being done because you have a foreign marriage certificate- if you did not have a foreign marriage certificate then you wouldnt need to change your name this way- since you do- you do. You may be told at first you dont need to do this- again explain that you do as you have a foreign marriage certificate. 

The 751 is never irrelevant. Not sure where your immigration lawyer friend got his law degree but the laws are very clear that once someone obtains a conditional GC , conditions must be removed, theres no wiggle room, no bypassing it, no skipping it. The process must be completed no exceptions.
 
Also as you experienced they can't just conduct your 751 interview because you're there and they are there. They need your 751 filing. They need an appropriate amount of time scheduled. 
 
I understand your frustration. The only good news is maybe your 751 will be approved w/o needing an interview. I would suggest reaching out to your congressman for assistance. You can voice your complaints about the process and the failure to have a combo interview as well. 

You know many many years ago there was a similar post. The reactions to it was completely different, basically the OP in it had explained his spouse had ended their relationship, suddenly, without warning, and refused to speak with him. He was bombarded with comments about how it 'wasn't right' for him to come.  Arguments above 'family unity' and fraud/visa misuse etc.
 
And after much discussion it was established that it didn't matter what the users on VJ felt personally about the topic- it is covered in immigration policy.  Once the visa is issued the visa holder is able to use it regardless of any personal issues the couple may have. The visa can be canceled by the petitioner withdrawing prior to the entry trip (where it becomes used). 
 
So immigration law says if he is in possession of a valid visa he can use it. Im sorry if you disagree with the advice given but it is the correct advice from a legal standpoint. Whether he should come and fight for his marriage or if it's wise to do such I am going to refrain from commenting as too few details were provided despite repeated attempts by @family for a more complete story as to whats going on between them. 

@lovinglive
 
I don't really understand your reluctance to answer questions users are asking. No one has asked for sensitive/extremely private information. There are ways to answer while still maintaining your privacy. And you can always ask the mods to edit out anything you may have posted if you later feel uncomfortable with how much you disclosed publicly. 
 
As others have explained often people ask questions with tunnel vision. They don't realize they are asking the wrong questions and specifics matter. One small detail can make a huge impact. 
 
But regardless,  you do realize there are a significant number of people w/o status in the US. Many can go for years,decades even never encountering issues. There are also people who aren't so lucky! The advice of plan for the worst case scenario is good advice. 
 
The worst case scenario here involves your partner being detained. This is not a clear cut users can walk you through step by step what would happen as yes, there is policy guidance but it also involves a lot of discretion by the Officers involved. It's almost like if you asked what happens if I am stopped by the cops for speeding? Will I get a ticket? Will I be able to get it reduced in court? No one can say. We can tell you the laws and what should happen but that doesn't mean it will play out that way..
 
Your partner is on a B visa. Until you marry your partner is an alien with no qualifying relatives (I assume unless she has other family here). An alien with no qualifying relatives on an expired B visa will have a variety problems if 'caught'. All can be generally resolved if you were to marry and file the appropriate paperwork but it will be costly and time consuming. Not really a path you should take. 
 
Once married the alien does have a qr (qualifying relative), but the marriage itself does not confer benefits . You must file the paperwork for such. So if the alien is 'caught' prior to it being filed there will be a variety of issues. Again they can all be resolved but your goal should be avoiding them. 
 
To avoid issues you need to file the AOS package (which you need to be married to do). Once it's accepted by USCIS the auth stay takes effect. However you will NOT have proof of such until you receive the NOA in the mail for it. This is where discretion comes in to play. The Officers can see what you filed but what most USCs have a hard time understanding is the immigration system has a guilty until proven innocent set up.  And its your burden not theirs! You should not expect them to look into the system and determine auth stay applies, because while they can they probably won't.  You claim to have auth stay you need to show them and the NOA is the documentation you need. 
 
Detention centers are not known for being pleasant rather the opposite. So if this urgent need for travel is because of a 'fun' trip that has already been planned and paid for (odd to have made such plans for a period of time they had no auth to be here for), well the fun trip will no longer be fun if detained and you will both be asking afterwards if it was worth it. Most likely it wasn't.  Or it can impact the relationship if the alien is uncomfortable but you pushed them because that's all they will be thinking about in detention. Traveling or remaining with no status or auth needs to be the aliens decision. 
 
There are a few posts from users who were detained on VJ you all can read through as well as on the internet in general. I would suggest you do such.