Iyawo_Omo_Yoruba

Our denial is simply a delay, we are already back at Lagos waiting for a second interview date. My husband and I believe that even though we werent prepared the first time, we simply need to continue waiting on God's time! A delay was in order for a reason, and who are we to question God's authority? Every step encountered has brought us both to different places within our lives together and separately. We understand that God is good all the time, and also that our mortal wants and needs do not necessarily line up with our Father's at the same time.
Many blessings and favor to you on this journey!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

This is quite the attack. Look, given the new laws you arent going to adjust, you will be sent back home and have to go through the process anyway. Our laws are in place to allow our country to do its best to keep fraudulent people out. Whether you think its crazy or not. For someone like myself who had to fight through 2 years in this system to get my husband home, it literally chaps my behind to hear someone wanting to come along and do things illegally. Do you think it was easy for US?? Nope! But we did it the way my country demands it be done, legally! And we went through a high fraud consulate! I hope you understand that you have put this on a website that immigration can and does check!

I want in on the Fajitas, but no pork though.

With all due respect you can't compare someone who can freely visit the US before and during the process with someone from Nigeria. We USC's married to nigerians its all on us to go there. And there are few very few countries they can go to without Visa so a 3rd country meet up is almost impoSsible.
It happens life happens.
I stayed with my husband 6 1/2 months my first and only visit. Its been now 17 months 16 days since I last saw him. But I am preparing to go now and will be there a few months before he moves.
Everybody doesn't have that luxury or leeway.
So don't judge or compare because when it comes to Nigeria there is no comparison.

1.) Get a bike. This can offer great exercise and freedom.
2.) Make maps of the neighborhood with places of interest indicated.
3.) Public transportation is available in most bigger cities--including Denver. I used it 20 years ago. Teach your partner-for-life how to use it and go visit a few key destinations in the first few weeks.
4.) Put together an information packet (similar to those in hotels) with how-to's for the remotes, washing machine, dates for trash day, rules for neighborhood, etc. Expect the functioning plumbing to be entirely new to anyone from outside Europe and North America,
Make an Information Packet for Your Home
5.) Get international calling on his cell phone. For us, Boost had the best deal with 50/month-ulimited text/data/talk and 10/month extra to call South America all he wants. (His phone works while he's in Mexico, too!)
6.) The dog idea is excellent. You can be social while still being shy. My husband wanted on so badly and we talked about it repeatedly but once he was here, he was happy only with our cat. He visits friends though and walks their dogs.
7.) Cooking, get him to gather up his family's favorite recipes to recreate here. Plan meals over Skype where y'all eat the same things while having nice dinner conversations.
8.) Fried chicken. I don't know about other countries, but for Peruvians, this is a big deal. Whatever typical comfort food he likes from here, you'd better (learn to) like it, too.
9.) Honey-do's. My husband was delighted to do some minor repairs and have his own furniture. His desk, office chair, and lamp are his own personal mini-man-cave and he LOVES them.
10.) Take video and pictures all the time. Your visa journey is NOT over. Be considering evidence to prove that you are married and legit here in the US. Compile the pictures/vid into a nice video for the holidays to send back home.
11.) If there is family of his (hers) already living in the US, plan to visit.
12.) Church. Get involved. This can be your best resource of friendship and information on everything from housing to jobs.

Obviously you were together recently and the baby you carry is proof. If they fight you over the fact that there is no proof on his end, you might want to consider DNA testing to prove your case. Yes, it's gonna cost money, but it also costs money to go through the process again.

OMG Now I get emails for about every new topic how in the world did this sneek by me. I am at my desk in tears. First LOLing at my VJ peeps. But so joyful in my heart that such wonderful people live in this big old world. You all have touched me deeply. I am so grateful.
And God I ask a special blessing on all who are here who wished me well and those on these very VJ walls, waiting for NOA2, accepted, case complete, Interviews and Visa aprrovals. We know you God as a way maker. We ask you make every crooked way straight and bless each of our homes, marriages, relationships. Bring familiescloser together, let that relative call thats been distance. fathers, daughters, children love ones we all come together in your might name we pray. amen
Thank you ya'll mmmmmmmwah big woop woop (L) (L) (L)
**Oh and I have a new age now I am thrity-twenty-five"** hehe

Way to get up and fight and honestly get your wife over there soonest. Tell her to request a second interview. It's a must she get there. No other evidence will matter with her making another visit unless there are other factors.

By all means do what you can to keep that petition in Lagos! Trust me, you do not want to wait the additional time frame. I have no other advice to give other than what others have mentioned. Feel for you, as we went down that road and waiting on our second interview almost a year later now.

Congratulations! You are almost there now!

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There have been when times in my life

when all seemed lost.

life just wasn't worth living through another day.

Then you need to remember things that are important to you.





For as low as we fall there is always something or someone, somewhere,

to help pull you back from the deep pits of darkness.

Once you feel yourself slipping grab on that something or someone.





We wonder why life has given us such a bad deal.

This is not to question.

Love, Hope and Faith will guide us.

Look around and find the things you need to live for.

If we look hard enough, we will find the place we need to be.





Hold on for your loved ones, hold on for yourself.

God will take you when he needs you.

Until then make the most that you can.

Love the best you can and never lose hope.





Each morning you wake up,

Thank God you are still alive to live another day to find your way.





Life is truly worth living for, if you look.

Find that place you need to be and just hold on.

First, God plays a huge role! Trusting in Him to lead this journey really helps! Secondly, don't stop living! Do the things you enjoy, hang out with friends, go out , or whatever it is that makes YOU happy. Make plans for the adjustment, places you wish to take him once he arrives, personally I love tackling a room at a time to get our house prepared for his arrival and also planning a traditional wedding which we missed out on. All because it makes me happy . Try not to focus on the hours, days, months etc. As it will really drag you down when you do so. Live in the moments of love and life! On hold doesn't mean stopping, it's simply a delay, nothing more, nothing less.

NorB, I won't give in to any more drama, yet must call you on what you term, helping Nigeria's image. What you are doing is NOT helping the image, you are simply generalizing and making deragatory comments about ALL the people, mostly men. We must call it as it is, women who get taken MUST and SHOULD own up to their part! There is more than enough media coverage regarding such things going on within the internet world. COME ON!! You seem to want to pin it all on the men and refer to women as being unintelligent. And if you wish to post on threads regarding husbands going missing, then lay it out there, within that topic. Or start your own topic, instead of going off topic on threads. Those who wish to listen to you will, while those of us who dont wont have be subjected to such hateful and ignorant things you speak of. Fine, its a free country, you are gonna do what you want, but I for one, will no longer partake nor reply to any negative thing you say after this posting. In fact, you should know that I am praying for you, because I can read between the lines. Friends or not, you are still a sister in Christ. May you find the happiness you are seeking. I am done, do not address me further, and do not be surprised if I do not respond back if you choose to do so anyway.

I am happy to say that I personally know more that have made it then that have failed. I know of several couples who have been married for 30, 20, and 10 years. I know MANY that are together well past the ROC. We all know some that have not made it, some that HAVE been scammed, but of the people I know personally the odds are in their favor.

Wow, I must have missed this somehow! I want to thank those of you who stood up for our Nigerian spouses in this thread!! I have often seen rude things being said on VJ, it's just sad that it is coming from "one of our own!" I am highly offended by comments made from extremely prejudice people! (they are not worth mentioning) I am very Proud of these people however!!
Dwheels76
Iyawo_Omo_Yoruba
Ebunoluwa
Jenkatx
LoveNigerMostyle
Thanks so much for telling them how it is, for real! I agree with you all 100%

We as women or men who are married, in a relationship with a Nigerian need to approach the whole VJ with an open mind, and based on the facts which surrounds being with a Nigerian or otherwise. A relationship is like a job, it needs work and continued effort whether it works or not it is based on many levels of complex issues which comes with "relationship" itself. Not so much on what the color of a person is, where he or she was born, what economic state they are in, how educated they are. It is based on finding what compliments one another and if the pros outweigh the cons.
In this day and age of technology, we are faced with an open forum to an endless opportunities to explore our options when it come to finding a mate. For years older men married much younger women and they were praised by other men and envied for it!
Now that women are marrying a younger men, most are jumping up and down screaming SCAM SCAM SCAM for many believe a younger man CAN'T find an older woman intellectually stimulating, mature, attractive,and worth loving. Or worth marrying for reasons other than for green card.
To each its own. We are humans. We are all unique and different,yet we are all on a quest to find happiness and a better life for ourselves. Whether we succeed or fail we would of learned a lesson. No one is perfect.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Best of luck to all of you VJers.

Opinions, facts, guidance, criticism and etc. can be done without being so negative or disrespectful. In every nationality, race, culture,and in each country there are the good and the bad and NOT only in Nigeria. One needs to approach this whole love and relationship path with anyone with open eyes, open mind and absorb the facts and advice presented here. All we need to do is be constructive support and not
Blessings to all of my VJ co-members.