Olomi_811

My comment was not to place blame nor was it to pinpoint Nigeria. Fact, your ex husband is Nigerian. Fact, You are remarried. Fact, you are still entertaining what takes place with your ex husband. Fact, you allow your friends to drop knowledge about him at your door so you can keep tabs. Fact, if you only wanted to clear your name you could have written immigration or gotten a lawyer to contact immigration. Fact, not everyone here is going to agree with your thoughts and as long as no one is violating VJ terms each is entitled to their thoughts and opinions and allowed to express them on YOUR VERSION OF THE FACTS.
Appreciate what you have and stop resenting the circumstances that brought you there.

There is ALWAYS another angle to any given story. It's been 5years... Let's move along people.
Galatian 6 vs 7 Be Not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man sows, that shall he also reap.

SD, what I have gotten out of this is that the OP has found out thru friends of the Nigeria community that her ex has a green card. She has narrowed it down to the fact that the only way he could have obtained it was by filing VAWA. Since as his sponsor and wife she did not file AOS for him.
Now all of the other pieces regarding, revenge and kamar are just discussion. I truly think she is over looking her blessing, because in this short period of time she has already found someone whom she consider to be better than what she lost.
Good luck to the OP going forward.

He has rights as a father, US and Jamaica have reciprocity rights toward custody and childsupport within some states in the US. I really doesn't matter where he lives he has rights as a father.
He has the father has done no know harm toward the child, the parents are at conflict, not child and parent.
As the parent of the child she may have to deal with him for the next 18 years, if ther was no child she could leave him in the wind and hve no follow up. Since there will be a child between the two, they will have to deal with each other.

What has your current husband said about the energy you've devoted to this?

From your lips to God's ears...

Is that a question you ask yourself often since you are older and he is younger ? Or what makes you feel you have the recipe for success and others don't ? Are you so insecure about your own age to mention age so often here ? Is your marriage a happy one or do you feel scammed as well because you are older.
Nigeria is the culture of this and that but within the culture are individual people with individual thinking that deviate from rigid cultural norm. I am not following my German culture as well, as I am a free thinker and I extend that same intelligence to Nigerian men to decide what part of his culture he wants to follow and what he wants to change.
I am curious why every topic has to turn around to end up with comments of scamming and older women.

why do you need advice to tell the truth?

You can have your husband email them requesting that you be the choice agent using the name that you filed under. Follow the thread for AUGUST NVC peeps and you will get the format for the email. Then when you get notification of AOS write a cover letter stating your name change and send copies of your new SS card and state id. Include it when you send your I864.

At the root of it, they don't care what kind of ceremony you have (church or court), they only care about the legitimacy of the relationship.

There are no set rules for Lagos. What worked for one couple, may not for another. Some have made several trips before marriage/filing and were denied, while others married on the first trip and filed right away and got approved. You have to do what you feel is best for you and your fiance`. As I can only speak for us and our experience as my husband and I married on the first trip (7/2008), and unfortunately I haven't been back since due to finances. In the same instance, it also took me almost 2 years to finally start the process (again due to finances). There were plenty of red flags (age difference for one, not returning to Nigeria came up briefly). I can only contribute our Visa approval the first time out to God. I did front load the I-130 with EVERYTHING we had.
God bless on your journey!

I generally do not post often here because of the amount of attacks one receives for giving their opinion but I figured I'd stick my neck out for you just to share MY experience which then influences my opinion. My husband and I were married during my first visit. I returned home, front loaded my I-130 and sent in the petition. I visited him three more times after submitting my petition, sent more evidence during the NVC stage of my visits after our wedding and guess what? My husband has been home with me for the past seven months. My opinion is if you are intending on visiting him after your initial visit while the petition is being processed you should be fine. My advice is to front load you petition and send whatever evidence you have at the NVC stage and it should go a long way. I pray you have a blessed and wonderful wedding, God bless you in your future endeavors.

I have no clue what you are going through, nor will I ask for personal details, as to that is not any of my business. I don't know how many people still use the VOWS in their weddings today, but unless there is adultry going on, or you or your kids are being beaten, I suggest the best advice of all..PRAYER..I will be praying for you as well. We must all remember the VOWS we say and take on that Special day. For richer or for poorer, in sickness and in good health, in the times of good and the times of bad, for all the days of our lives, until death due us part. Too many people are forgetting these vows nowadays. And I hate to say it, but America has the highest rate of divorces than any other countries. Its heartbreaking. Im not trying to tell you what to do..just giving advice as you asked. If you have never heard of it, there is a Great movie, titled Fireproof. If you can find it, watch it together, or watch it alone. Fireproof your marriage. Im not saying that there will never be hard times, or disagreements. Im only saying remember why you two got married. You stated you have 2 children, 3 stepchildren...You have five children who will be affected, majorly affected. Pray, as I will with you.
Mateo

Your petition likely won't stay at the NVC long enough to have any extra items matched to it. You will be better off sending it on to the beneficiary with your other documents (e.g. I-134, etc.).

For Nigerians, it's two forms. Go to the National Population Commission of Nigeria in Lagos. They'll tell you how to do it. An overview is that the mother of the child will give two passport photos and signs an affidavit of the child's birth. They also need a passport photo of the child. Then the National Population Commission will give you a birth attestation. The US consultant needs both of these forms. The NPC in Sululere. You don't ask for a "long form birth certificate." Tell them you need a birth certificate for the US consulate. It shouldn't be more than 5500N.

The instruction to me was to write the beneficiary's name, Date of Birth and NVC Case# at the back of the picture. Use black pen.

DON'T DO IT! Your friend has already shown that she has disregard for laws. Her husband's employability is unstable. If she divorces her husband and needs additional support while here YOU WILL BE ON THE HOOK FOR HER. If she ever gets public aid and it's found out you will be responsible for paying it back.
Why isn't he asking someone in his family to help sponsor her? DON'T DO IT! BIG RED FLAGS!!!

Life is a gamble. It doesnt matter whether you marry someone from here or there, you dont know the outcome. All you can do is pray for the best and have faith i your partner.

If your husband continues to communicate with you through email there is an IP address attached which could lead you to a physical address. I'm not suggesting that you show up there informing you of how to track his whereabouts.

A petitioner should treat this process as though there was not a "return to sender" option. It's not fair to look at your role in this journey from a position of leverage and power. People mention the heart of the USC; it's bad enough that USCIS paperwork refer to people as ALIENS (hubby really took offense to that), but to have the frame of mind that only the USC has a heart implies that you believe your worth is more.
When the relationship is USC & USC the issue of returning them is null. Can you truly say the hurt is greater when the person is from another country or is your mentality that you believe you've paid for this person so they owe you?

Translation for all the posters perceived as haters by the OP...
What they really meant to say was "Congratulations they hope you get exactly what you deserve!"

Translation for all the posters perceived as haters by the OP...
What they really meant to say was "Congratulations they hope you get exactly what you deserve!"

Translation for all the posters perceived as haters by the OP...
What they really meant to say was "Congratulations they hope you get exactly what you deserve!"

I don't normally go in this forum, but this thread showed up on the main page. I should probably set aside my personal feelings about the OP's use of words, language and overall arrogance about this topic, but wow...
First of all, the OP's user name looks like a first name and last initial. I bet it wouldn't be hard to figure out exactly who this person is if someone from the government really does read this forum, as speculated. What about the email address used to sign up for this site? Wouldn't she be afraid of the mods reporting her? Maybe there's a reason why these posts are never deleted and can only be edited after a short time.
If she's in a real, legitimate relationship, then she just got lucky. I wanted to ignore this thread, but this whole situation makes me sad when I think about all of the effort me and my guy have put in to do things right and legally - all the time we've had to spend apart. He's from the UK too and visited twice under the VWP and never overstayed. Everyone on this forum who has to deal with sacrifice... the OP's post is just a slap in the face.

Wowwww... Just wow. Nothing more to say about OP's post. Wonder if she got a state ID with a fake SS#... And on top of it all, every job application I filled out clearly asked if u can show proof of being able to work legally.