I am a Nov 2021 filer who is also a data dude. When I filed, the estimate was 6-8 months so I share your pain. I have been monitoring both internally reported VJ data and data independently scanned from the USCIS site since the announcement in Mar. You are right. The processing time has continued to slip. In fact, current data show that the actual processing delay is just shy of 14.5 months. There has been a gradual trend up in the number of weekly cases processed but not enough to reverse the slide.
The hope some of us had was that after fiscal year end, resources might be shifted from visas that had yearly quotas to K1 and CR1 starting Oct 1 . It is still too early to notice a definitive shift but there have been a couple of days with a large number of processed cases reported; these might be a reporting anomaly since the day before was unusually low. They seem to be closing outstanding cases from previous months much faster than before. It is also encouraging that they started processing Aug well before Jul untouched cases had approached 500 which seemed to be the trigger previously for moving to next month. Interesting that they are processing across many data ranges in Aug, which would indicate they have distributed the work across many adjudicators in parallel. Cases are definitely not processed in strict numerical order as some folks seem to think is or should be the case. Don't know if this gives you hope but perhaps it provides a little transparency which USCUS seems to abhor.
Shifting to your initial topic, my fiancé and I are also a same sex couple. We actually could get married in his home country but chose to do it in Hawaii (we're romantic). There is one option that I learned about after I filed for K1: the Utah online marriage. During the pandemic Utah and a few other states permitted on line marriages. Of these, Utah continues to offer the service and since same sex marriage is recognized at the federal level, Utah support it in their online marriages. (Yes Utah!). You and your partner can each be in any location, inside or outside the US and even in separate countries. This is a legitimate marriage (marriage by proxy...I asked my lawyer) recognized by many governmental agencies, including the IRS so mind your taxes. The one catch is that for it to be recognized by USCIS you and your fiancé must meet once AFTER the wedding to consummate it, as opposed to meeting once BEFORE applying for the K1. Consummate in this context just means any in-person meeting, not in the biblical sense (It has been asked...on-line sex doesn't count for this purpose). If our K1 visa is denied for any reason, we will do this and immediately apply for CR1 since by then we will have been together more than 10 times.