It's over...Preparing for the Next Steps!

[JayMar2019 2,741]

Good Afternoon,

 

I'll try to be brief, if I can. Quick timeline:

• I am the Petitioner/USC
• Met in Jamaica on a girls' trip in March 2016
• Filed K1 Visa May 2017
• Husband (Beneficiary) came to the US June 2018
• Married July 2018
• Got Pregnant with our son October 2018
• Husband received GC June 2019
• Son born July 2019

 

Within this timeline, there has been infidelity/adultery on my husband's behalf I have hardcopy paper proof:

• bank statements showing a purchase at a Days Inn Hotel on Feb. 2019 in a completely different state where the hotel is over a hour away from where we live
• bank statements showing him sending money via cashapp to other women
• several screenshots and pictures of him talking to other women on facebook
• In Nov 2018, he actually ADMITTED TO ME that he had sex with another woman in Jamaica while waiting for our K1 VISA interview and the ONLY reason he told me was because we found out I was pregnant with our son and when I told him I would be tested for STDs and other lab work he had to tell me because he was told during his medical exam that he had an STD which he had to go back to the medical center to take the pill (2 days before our K1 VISA interview), and only told me in case I come back positive with something.
• 4-5 weeks of son's life found out he was talking to and video chatting with women through a sex social media site - I actually saw the notifications he was receiving
• And finally yesterday, by accident (or maybe it was God's will), I sat down on the couch and accidently sat on his battery cord which came out of is phone. His screen lit up and I saw a notification with a woman's picture and her message saying "I care deeply for you" TO MY HUSBAND.

 

I have tried, and tried, and tried, etc., to move on and put these indiscretions in the pass, mainly for the sake of our now 9 month old son, but I can no longer do this and will no longer do this because it is affecting my happiness, my sanity, and I have a 17 year old (from a prior relationship) that this is also affecting because of him witnessing the disrespect I am taking. Since Dec/Jan., he will "selectively" help pay the bills that I allotted him to pay (he clearly doesn't make as much as I do but he needs to be held accountable), and at this point, I feel like I've been used and still being used for the purpose of shelter and to have access to his son at HIS convenience.

 

He's not on the lease (never added him), and due to a car accident and a speeding ticket he got in his car, I removed him off of my car insurance and he has his own. I have removed him off of my card credits as authorized users, he actually has his own health insurance his job automatically enrolled him after his 90 day probation. The only thing we have left joint is this bank account that I am about to close since he has his own account and I barely use it. I already filed our taxes this year but I'm hoping that by starting the process of divorce at the very least, I can file as married filed-separately if we are not done finalizing our divorce.

 

Here in Delaware, I have to give him 30 day notice which I plan on mailing a certified letter to him so that this way he cannot say he was never provided proper notice and if he doesn't vacate after 30 days, I can call the police to have him removed. We have to be separated 6 months and/or not have sex for 6 months before the divorce can be final and do a parent class. The divorce part I plan on filing under adultery and adding all the proof that I have.

 

So my question is...his GC expires 6/18/2021. I know that I don't have to be present in order for him to apply and interview at the ROC. But will USCIS contact me to come to the interview? Can I provide this proof to the IO for his interview to show he did not enter this marriage in "good faith"? I know he will have to provide a divorce decree but other than me not signing the petition and signing an affidavit confirming the validity of our marriage, is there anything else that I can do to show that he basically used me or the very least, that the marriage ended due to his fault?

 

Thank you for reading and thanks for your advice!

Edited April 29, 2020 by JayMar2019

[JeanneAdil 6,187]

Others will answer the immigration and AOS part but i will ask 1st,  was he married to this woman before he left his country (or does she just call him "her husband")?   that is important as if he was,  he was not free to marry you at all and would be guilty of fraud 

[JayMar2019 2,741]

1 minute ago, JeanneAdil said:

Others will answer the immigration and AOS part but i will ask 1st,  was he married to this woman before he left his country (or does she just call him "her husband")?   that is important as if he was,  he was not free to marry you at all and would be guilty of fraud 

That was me referring to the fact that another women told MY HUSBAND that she "cares deeply for him". He was not married prior.

 

He has been cheating and talking with other women during our marriage.

[arken 4,197]

Once you two are divorced he can do ROC on his own with the divorce waiver option. They don’t need your signed petition or signed affidavit for validity of marriage. You vouched for him during K1 and during AOS and he got GC based on that. As long as there is some concrete evidence that he planned all this out to get GC, USCIS usually doesn’t care and they are highly not likely to investigate on such stuffs.

Post marriage anything can happen and people can separate/divorce and usually doesn’t impact ROC.

 

If you truly believe he used you to get GC, one way to screw him up is don’t divorce and keep separated. His ROC will likely be denied based on no good evidences of marital relationship.

Edited April 29, 2020 by arken

[JayMar2019 2,741]

8 minutes ago, arken said:

Once you two are divorced he can do ROC on his own with the divorce waiver option. They don’t need your signed petition or signed affidavit for validity of marriage. You vouched for him during K1 and during AOS and he got GC based on that. As long as there is some concrete evidence that he planned all this out to get GC, USCIS usually doesn’t care and they are highly not likely to investigate on such stuffs.

Post marriage anything can happen and people can separate/divorce and usually doesn’t impact ROC.

 

If you truly believe he used you to get GC, one way to screw him up is don’t divorce and keep separated. His ROC will likely be denied based on no good evidences of marital relationship.

But wouldn't he get denied for no good evidences of marital relationship if we have nothing joint anymore but I still file the divorce?

 

I do feel in my gut I was used for the GC....I mean 2 days before his K1 interview he was at the medical center getting a pill to take to get rid of the STD, while I'm waiting at his mom's house for him to come back because he lied saying the forgot to get give him a required vaccine. He put my life at jepoardy because I didn't know he had a STD until after we got married and when I found out I was pregnant. And he had no intentions on telling me this, me becoming pregnant is why he told me.

 

Either way, I want him out of my life...granted, we have our son to co-parent so he will still be in my life at some type of capacity. But I guess my question is...if he files ROC with the waiver and they a ask him to provide proof of why the marriage is over which they would be requesting the divorce petition, they will have all the attachments that I would attaching as proof of adultery.

 

So basically....as long as he can show a few pictures of us together he pretty much will get approved for ROC? Regardless if I have proof showing his true intentions?

 

Edited April 29, 2020 by JayMar2019

[Pinkrlion 2,607]

In a divorce waiver, he only has to provide proof of bonafide marriage.  Don't provide him the evidence.  He can file and provide divorce decree, but it is more than that to be approved.  Don't focus on his immigration, focus on freeing yourself.

[JayMar2019 2,741]

1 minute ago, Pinkrlion said:

In a divorce waiver, he only has to provide proof of bonafide marriage.  Don't provide him the evidence.  He can file and provide divorce decree, but it is more than that to be approved.  Don't focus on his immigration, focus on freeing yourself.

Well I'm currently drafting a 30 day notice to vacate letter now so that I can have it mailed to him certified.

 

The divorce part I know will take care of itself - other than our son, we have nothing else to sort out in court. I just have to hope that the divorce will be finalized under adultery. Either way, I'm gonna free myself.

 

I guess right now, knowing all I know and have endured, I really didn't foresee me going through this. And while I'm not trying to be spiteful, I would think that since our marriage will be ending at fault of his own, based on what research I've done, USCIS would inquire about the "fault" part and since we have nothing together anymore that proof of ongoing marriage would be difficult.

 

Someone suggested I walk to start the divorce which would provide even less proof of evidence? Is it wise to do or pointless?

[Crazy Cat 39,151]

1 hour ago, JayMar2019 said:

Good Afternoon,

 

I'll try to be brief, if I can. Quick timeline:

• I am the Petitioner/USC
• Met in Jamaica on a girls' trip in March 2016
• Filed K1 Visa May 2017
• Husband (Beneficiary) came to the US June 2018
• Married July 2018
• Got Pregnant with our son October 2018
• Husband received GC June 2019
• Son born July 2019

 

Within this timeline, there has been infidelity/adultery on my husband's behalf I have hardcopy paper proof:

• bank statements showing a purchase at a Days Inn Hotel on Feb. 2019 in a completely different state where the hotel is over a hour away from where we live
• bank statements showing him sending money via cashapp to other women
• several screenshots and pictures of him talking to other women on facebook
• In Nov 2018, he actually ADMITTED TO ME that he had sex with another woman in Jamaica while waiting for our K1 VISA interview and the ONLY reason he told me was because we found out I was pregnant with our son and when I told him I would be tested for STDs and other lab work he had to tell me because he was told during his medical exam that he had an STD which he had to go back to the medical center to take the pill (2 days before our K1 VISA interview), and only told me in case I come back positive with something.
• 4-5 weeks of son's life found out he was talking to and video chatting with women through a sex social media site - I actually saw the notifications he was receiving
• And finally yesterday, by accident (or maybe it was God's will), I sat down on the couch and accidently sat on his battery cord which came out of is phone. His screen lit up and I saw a notification with a woman's picture and her message saying "I care deeply for you" TO MY HUSBAND.

 

I have tried, and tried, and tried, etc., to move on and put these indiscretions in the pass, mainly for the sake of our now 9 month old son, but I can no longer do this and will no longer do this because it is affecting my happiness, my sanity, and I have a 17 year old (from a prior relationship) that this is also affecting because of him witnessing the disrespect I am taking. Since Dec/Jan., he will "selectively" help pay the bills that I allotted him to pay (he clearly doesn't make as much as I do but he needs to be held accountable), and at this point, I feel like I've been used and still being used for the purpose of shelter and to have access to his son at HIS convenience.

 

He's not on the lease (never added him), and due to a car accident and a speeding ticket he got in his car, I removed him off of my car insurance and he has his own. I have removed him off of my card credits as authorized users, he actually has his own health insurance his job automatically enrolled him after his 90 day probation. The only thing we have left joint is this bank account that I am about to close since he has his own account and I barely use it. I already filed our taxes this year but I'm hoping that by starting the process of divorce at the very least, I can file as married filed-separately if we are not done finalizing our divorce.

 

Here in Delaware, I have to give him 30 day notice which I plan on mailing a certified letter to him so that this way he cannot say he was never provided proper notice and if he doesn't vacate after 30 days, I can call the police to have him removed. We have to be separated 6 months and/or not have sex for 6 months before the divorce can be final and do a parent class. The divorce part I plan on filing under adultery and adding all the proof that I have.

 

So my question is...his GC expires 6/18/2021. I know that I don't have to be present in order for him to apply and interview at the ROC. But will USCIS contact me to come to the interview? Can I provide this proof to the IO for his interview to show he did not enter this marriage in "good faith"? I know he will have to provide a divorce decree but other than me not signing the petition and signing an affidavit confirming the validity of our marriage, is there anything else that I can do to show that he basically used me or the very least, that the marriage ended due to his fault?

 

Thank you for reading and thanks for your advice!

1.  Protect yourself physically and legally.

2.  Seek happiness for yourself.

3.  Let the immigration matters go.  You are not required to participate.  It is in his hands.

Edited April 29, 2020 by Lucky Cat

[Pinkrlion 2,607]

Immigration does not care about adultery.  They only care about marriage fraud.  Whom ever starts the divorce process is irrelevant.  I know that it is painful what you are going thorough, it will work in your favor by getting the divorce.  It will be up to him to prove bonafide/good faith marriage.

Edited April 29, 2020 by Pinkrlion

[JayMar2019 2,741]

4 minutes ago, Pinkrlion said:

Immigration does not care about adultery.  They only care about marriage fraud.  Whom ever starts the divorce process is irrelevant.  I know that it is painful what you are going thorough, it will work in your favor by getting the divorce.  It will be up to him to prove bonafide/good faith marriage.

Well, I guess I don't have enough for marriage fraud.

 

Yes it is painful because Lord knows I took my time and paid attention to every detail or "red flags" and just for things to be where they are and what I'm going through. Plus, this pandemic makes it unbearable to have to be confined in this apartment with him another minute let alone 30 days......I know I have to keep my composure for my kids and I keep telling myself that this too shall pass, but the pain and anger I feel right now.

 

Last question....I know I'm on the hook for 10 years based on the I-864. Is it based on the date I signed the I-864 or does the date go into effect from the date he initially got his 2-year GC?

[Crazy Cat 39,151]

16 minutes ago, JayMar2019 said:

I know I'm on the hook for 10 years based on the I-864.

 Could less than 10 years....or longer than 10 years.....you are obligated until one of the following occurs (from the time he became a legal resident (Green Card issued))

 

1.  Immigrant becomes US citizen

2.  Immigrant is credited with 40 quarters of work

3.  Immigrant  dies

4.  Immigrant ceases to be a lawful permanent resident and departs the United States

Edited April 29, 2020 by Lucky Cat

[JayMar2019 2,741]

4 minutes ago, Lucky Cat said:

 Could less than 10 years....or longer than 10 years.....you are obligated until one of the following occurs (from the time he became a legal resident (Green Card issued))

 

1.  Immigrant becomes US citizen

2.  Immigrant is credited with 40 quarters of work

3.  Immigrant  dies

4.  Immigrant ceases to be a lawful permanent resident and departs the United States

Well but the off chance that 1-4 do not occur, I would be on the hook after 10 years from his initial GC which was issued on 6/18/2018?

 

[Crazy Cat 39,151]

9 minutes ago, JayMar2019 said:

Well but the off chance that 1-4 do not occur, I would be on the hook after 10 years from his initial GC which was issued on 6/18/2018?

 

There is no time limit.....it would be indefinite....if none of the conditions occur.....

Edited April 29, 2020 by Lucky Cat

[OhioLovesUK 27]

On the hook ?  I'm interested what that actually means...  What exactly are you liable for after signing a  I-864?

[TBoneTX 43,002]

In theory, the government could ask you to reimburse it for means-tested benefits claimed by the immigrant.

This is why, in a failed relationship, the I-864 should be withdrawn before the immigrant has a green card.