I Feel Personally Judged by J. Lo’s Body

[laylalex 7,293]

Quote

 

Women watch a 15-minute show featuring elite entertainers and, in some cases, end up feeling bad about ourselves.

Men, meanwhile, watch a three-hour game, played by elite athletes with single-digit body fat, and most won’t feel a single twinge of self-doubt, or miss a single chip from the nacho platter.

Women see inspiration or goals we’ve failed to attain or a pretty stick to beat ourselves up with. We hear a voice (sponsored by Weight Watchers and Revlon and Planet Fitness and Jenny Craig) whispering This can be yours, if you just work hard enough. Men see entertainment, athletes who exist on a different plane than mere mortals. Their inner voice whispers, Are there any more nachos? I don’t even think it would occur to them to feel bad, or try to emulate what they saw.

 

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/04/opinion/jlo-superbowl-performance.html

 

I'm 34, so I'm still (I think) on the right side of the "You Must Be This Hot in Order to Participate" sign (that's what the author calls it, not me!), but I do agree that a lot of the comparison-making that's being done is by women comparing themselves to other women. I take care of myself in my body and my mind, and don't intend to give up on either as I get older. My mom is almost 65 and has been a great role model for this. She looked great at 50 but she wasn't poledancing -- she prefers the treadmill and Pilates. (Agree with her on the Pilates.) But if I get to 50 and I'm a little saggy despite all the care I'm putting in, I'm going to try to be easy on myself. Maybe I'll even let my inner voice whisper, Are there any more nachos?

[Boiler 45,658]

 

Probably says it better than I can put it into words.

[laylalex 7,293]

If you ever wanted to know what going out for the evening is like with my sister, you can just refer to this clip. (Although she usually makes sure someone gets her on the list before going to avoid having to be reminded that she's old.)

[Boiler 45,658]

So who is the pregnant one? I always found it goes in stages, with a slump, sometimes associated with a slight recovery. Very very few have good enough genes to noticeably stop the trend despite all the lotions, 

 

You tend to think of those who try too hard or are too desperate and you wonder if they have no friends to tell them to ease off. Meg Ryan comes to mind.

 

Anyway supports a Billion Dollar industry. And it is not as if most people do not have an issue.

 

 

[Neonred 3,575]

35 minutes ago, Boiler said:

 

Probably says it better than I can put it into words.

Is that a family friendly clip?  LOL

 

At least those were not your words!

Edited February 4, 2020 by Neonred

[Boiler 45,658]

Hmm, well they were not happy and to be honest I just remembered the clip and not the verbiage.

[laylalex 7,293]

35 minutes ago, Boiler said:

So who is the pregnant one? I always found it goes in stages, with a slump, sometimes associated with a slight recovery. Very very few have good enough genes to noticeably stop the trend despite all the lotions, 

 

You tend to think of those who try too hard or are too desperate and you wonder if they have no friends to tell them to ease off. Meg Ryan comes to mind.

 

Anyway supports a Billion Dollar industry. And it is not as if most people do not have an issue.

Neither of us are the pregnant one. She says wants a baby but no marriage, and I want a marriage but (probably) no baby. Maybe she should marry Alex and I should marry her boyfriend? Actually, scratch that, I think she'd like that. She hit on Al at my first wedding. (I have never forgotten this.)

 

Meg Ryan - what a shame what she did to her face. Just totally unnecessary. There are so many others -- all I have to do is walk out my door and I see evidence of it in "normal" women just walking around here. Why make your lips look like that? Why make your boobies so large? It all looks fake, not beautiful.  

[Boiler 45,658]

Even blokes notice, well if it is very obvious. I remember talking to a lady in the Brew Pub, caked on, always wondered what she looked like underneath all that, if I would even recognise her.

[Neonred 3,575]

9 minutes ago, laylalex said:

 

Meg Ryan - what a shame what she did to her face. Just totally unnecessary. There are so many others -- all I have to do is walk out my door and I see evidence of it in "normal" women just walking around here. Why make your lips look like that? Why make your boobies so large? It all looks fake, not beautiful.  

Yes.  I do some Botox and fillers for select patients and friends, but it always disturbs me to see "duck lips" on some people, especially celebs.

 

I always thought that a really good result is one that was not so noticable.   Maybe I'm wrong.

[laylalex 7,293]

2 minutes ago, Neonred said:

Yes.  I do some Botox and fillers for select patients and friends, but it always disturbs me to see "duck lips" on some people, especially celebs.

 

I always thought that a really good result is one that was not so noticable.   Maybe I'm wrong.

I absolutely agree with you that a little filler here and there that is done sensitively and a light hand is not a bad thing at all. My mom has had some Juvederm and Botox and she looks fresh and rested and age-appropriate. My sister has had some small tweaks on her lips (she finally admitted it) but again, not obvious. They look plush as opposed to Donatella Versace level of big.

[yuna628 9,680]

I don't care one bit about JLO's body and don't feel the slightest bit disturbed that she is by all accounts more fit than me. The girl can climb a pole, but hey so could the big girl dancers at Lizzo concerts so good on her. How is she hanging on, my husband asked? Very strong thighs, I said. And to be fair, back in the day before my body crapped out, I probably could of hung onto a pole too. Once had a MMA fighter try and leg wrestle me, and though I didn't win I did give him a fight. Yoga helps and knowing some martial arts.

 

But sure, there's a huge pressure on women and girls to look a certain way.. and mostly the way is not that beautiful. To be fair, guys get a similar treatment. We shouldn't live in fear of age and sag or try and turn ourselves into something we're not. Going gray? Who cares. Going bald? It's beautiful. Honestly wish people could work more on their empathy and kindness rather than appearances.

[Cyberfx1024 7,980]

2 hours ago, laylalex said:

1 hour ago, Boiler said:

Even blokes notice, well if it is very obvious. I remember talking to a lady in the Brew Pub, caked on, always wondered what she looked like underneath all that, if I would even recognise her.

Meg Ryan - what a shame what she did to her face. Just totally unnecessary. There are so many others -- all I have to do is walk out my door and I see evidence of it in "normal" women just walking around here. Why make your lips look like that? Why make your boobies so large? It all looks fake, not beautiful.  

This is a big problem in the Philippines because of you can afford it then the woman will have some type of whitening cream on their face and their arms. They are sincerely trying to become as white as possible when all the white women are trying to become tan like them. I had a pretty woman hit on me in the market in my wife's hometown. She was honestly very pretty but had that cream literally caked on her face and arms it was sad. 

 

BTW good luck trying to find sun cream under SPF50 without skin whitening.

[Steeleballz 7,550]

3 hours ago, yuna628 said:

I don't care one bit about JLO's body and don't feel the slightest bit disturbed that she is by all accounts more fit than me. The girl can climb a pole, but hey so could the big girl dancers at Lizzo concerts so good on her. How is she hanging on, my husband asked? Very strong thighs, I said. And to be fair, back in the day before my body crapped out, I probably could of hung onto a pole too. Once had a MMA fighter try and leg wrestle me, and though I didn't win I did give him a fight. Yoga helps and knowing some martial arts.

 

But sure, there's a huge pressure on women and girls to look a certain way.. and mostly the way is not that beautiful. To be fair, guys get a similar treatment. We shouldn't live in fear of age and sag or try and turn ourselves into something we're not. Going gray? Who cares. Going bald? It's beautiful. Honestly wish people could work more on their empathy and kindness rather than appearances.

 

     On the bright side, once you go bald, you stop worrying about going gray.

[Ban Hammer 13,400]

5 hours ago, laylalex said:

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/04/opinion/jlo-superbowl-performance.html

 

I'm 34, so I'm still (I think) on the right side of the "You Must Be This Hot in Order to Participate" sign (that's what the author calls it, not me!), but I do agree that a lot of the comparison-making that's being done is by women comparing themselves to other women. I take care of myself in my body and my mind, and don't intend to give up on either as I get older. My mom is almost 65 and has been a great role model for this. She looked great at 50 but she wasn't poledancing -- she prefers the treadmill and Pilates. (Agree with her on the Pilates.) But if I get to 50 and I'm a little saggy despite all the care I'm putting in, I'm going to try to be easy on myself. Maybe I'll even let my inner voice whisper, Are there any more nachos?

this is why it is important to hone your sammich making skills at an early age.

[Voice of Reason 10,298]

Anyone who feels "judged" or "shamed" by another person's body is weak and is doomed to suffer.