US spouse has student debt. If I move there, am I liable?

[Jeanne Adil 1,651]

1 minute ago, SCOREAU said:

We have a house, I have a good job. I have no criminal record. I can retire early. We can have a good life here, and it all feels like a bad choice. Okay, her family are there but if it all goes tits up, they won't be helping.

Me personally,   i would stay in UK 

sounds like you would be giving a lot up to come to the US / for What????

she can visit her family anytime

[gregcrs2 1,777]

OP, I think some people may be responding based on some misconception.  To clarify, your family has been living in the UK with you for the past 10 years and they are still there with you?  Do either you or your spouse have any US assets such as house?  

[Jeanne Adil 1,651]

1 minute ago, gregcrs2 said:

OP, I think some people may be responding based on some misconception.  To clarify, your family has been living in the UK with you for the past 10 years and they are still there with you?  Do either you or your spouse have any US assets such as house?  

he already said she doesn't

[Boiler 43,396]

I think the OP has valid concerns, we always think of healthcare etc, it is a big ask.

[SCOREAU 36]

1 minute ago, gregcrs2 said:

OP, I think some people may be responding based on some misconception.  To clarify, your family has been living in the UK with you for the past 10 years and they are still there with you?  Do either you or your spouse have any US assets such as house?  

No. Nothing. It's all here. She came with nothing.

[gregcrs2 1,777]

Just now, SCOREAU said:

No. Nothing. It's all here. She came with nothing.

The choice seems pretty obvious to me.  I would be staying in the UK.  Too many expenses to move, finding another place to live, replacing furniture, extremely expensive health care, and you may not even be happy there.  Being at early retirement age, you'd be giving up the lifetime of relationships you've developed.  If the wife is homesick, I would just let her visit her family in the USA how often she wants.  It would be much easier and less expensive then moving.

[SCOREAU 36]

8 minutes ago, adil-rafa said:

Me personally,   i would stay in UK 

sounds like you would be giving a lot up to come to the US / for What????

she can visit her family anytime

That's what I'm thinking, but she's adamant about moving there, with or without me if I'm not keen. Great! So I'd have to get accommodation here and support her and my daughter. Back to square 1.

[SCOREAU 36]

1 minute ago, gregcrs2 said:

The choice seems pretty obvious to me.  I would be staying in the UK.  Too many expenses to move, finding another place to live, replacing furniture, extremely expensive health care, and you may not even be happy there.  Being at early retirement age, you'd be giving up the lifetime of relationships you've developed.  If the wife is homesick, I would just let her visit her family in the USA how often she wants.  It would be much easier and less expensive then moving.

Yes. It all makes sense. I'm made to feel guilty about her being away from her family.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

25 minutes ago, SCOREAU said:

It has everything to do with my retiring early, being free of debt, and providing for my wife and daughter, who is settled here anyway - and not moving to a country that, apart from having no public healthcare, would be our final life decision in terms of where we live. I'm through with debt. It's called being sensible.

She has nothing over there, apart from student debt and family.

You aren't free of debt if your spouse has debt. From a legal standpoint, it isn't your debt, but as a married couple, you guys need to get on that. I paid off my husband's loans when we got married (the interest rate on them was crazy). Now, we pay off my student debt together. Who knows whose money it is when it goes into the joint checking and it doesn't matter.

 

It is also our only debt and that doesn't bother me.

 

Just now, SCOREAU said:

That's what I'm thinking, but she's adamant about moving there, with or without me if I'm not keen. Great! So I'd have to get accommodation here and support her and my daughter. Back to square 1.

So, you are thinking about separating then?  Explains the lack of interest in paying for loans.

[SCOREAU 36]

13 minutes ago, gregcrs2 said:

OP, I think some people may be responding based on some misconception.  To clarify, your family has been living in the UK with you for the past 10 years and they are still there with you?  Do either you or your spouse have any US assets such as house?  

We are buying a cheap house off her brother, so we will have somewhere.

[Boiler 43,396]

Sounds like you really know the answer and are looking for confirmation, a not practical plan and you will be the one picking up the problems when it falls apart.

[SCOREAU 36]

Just now, N-o-l-a said:

You aren't free of debt if your spouse has debt. From a legal standpoint, it isn't your debt, but as a married couple, you guys need to get on that. I paid off my husband's loans when we got married (the interest rate on them was crazy). Now, we pay off my student debt together. Who knows whose money it is when it goes into the joint checking and it doesn't matter.

 

It is also our only debt and that doesn't bother me.

 

So, you are thinking about separating then?  Explains the lack of interest in paying for loans.

No. I'm not that sort of person. I'm just thinking about a quiet retirement, rather than being saddled with debt and more woes beyond the usual ones we all experience in life.

[Jeanne Adil 1,651]

3 minutes ago, SCOREAU said:

Yes. It all makes sense. I'm made to feel guilty about her being away from her family.

why?   and Don't

it was her decision to move there

women are good at making men feel guility and you guys are so gullible

 

you need health care here (expensive) 

think of all of this

 

and i would not let her take your daughter out of the UK

 

 

[gregcrs2 1,777]

3 minutes ago, SCOREAU said:

We are buying a cheap house off her brother, so we will have somewhere.

Hope you realize family and money usually don't mix well.  And "we" would not be buying a house, it would be you buying it.  I just see potential problems.  Maybe she should go live with her parents for a while.  I know that the more I see some of my relatives, the faster I want to run away from some of them.

[Amadia 711]

1 hour ago, Roel said:

you'd rather stay separately than move in and help her pay off her debt?

OP stated - In the process of applying to move to usa as the uk spouse of a us citizen who has been in uk for a decade.

So it was not a case of staying apart but rather staying in the UK as opposed to coming to the US.

 

My question tho, was student loan debt being paid in increments or not at all and was the US spouse hiding out in UK to avoid payments? 😕