K1 visa or ??? not sure Want to marry cuban girlfriend.

[NikLR 13,220]

4 minutes ago, awakendabeast said:

I met her 1 year ago and we started emailing each other everyday then calling on the phone but that can get expensive and so we started free video chat on IMO about once a week. I started sending her money for this or that and now what i thought was just to help is now like a little rent each month. I dont mind because i care for her. I visited her twice this year once for 7 days and the second time for 11 days. I have only met her aunt because she lives on the outskirts of Holguin. I was initially really ready to get married but lately i thought what if the only reason she speaks to me is for that little rent i give her? Because there is money involved validity of my relationship might be completely false. My plan was to hold off a bit and go stay in cuba for 1 month in her home town see if her family embraces me and see if there is no boyfriend anywhere in the shadows. This is cuba and it has a really bad rap as to people scamming and that couples encourage each other to scam tourist. It feels real to me. 

Like another poster suggested, you can suggest moving to Cuba instead.  If she says OMG NO or balks at the idea of both of you happily settling down in Cuba you may have your answer. 

[Chocobo 196]

18 minutes ago, awakendabeast said:

I met her 1 year ago and we started emailing each other everyday then calling on the phone but that can get expensive and so we started free video chat on IMO about once a week. I started sending her money for this or that and now what i thought was just to help is now like a little rent each month. I dont mind because i care for her. I visited her twice this year once for 7 days and the second time for 11 days. I have only met her aunt because she lives on the outskirts of Holguin. I was initially really ready to get married but lately i thought what if the only reason she speaks to me is for that little rent i give her? Because there is money involved validity of my relationship might be completely false. My plan was to hold off a bit and go stay in cuba for 1 month in her home town see if her family embraces me and see if there is no boyfriend anywhere in the shadows. This is cuba and it has a really bad rap as to people scamming and that couples encourage each other to scam tourist. It feels real to me. 

Please slow things down and take more time to ponder this.  Marriage is tough, and divorce is hell.  Toss immigration stuff into it... nightmare.  I agree w/the pp's - talk about maybe living in Cuba or just not the US and see her reaction.  The money is a potential red flag, especially if you're sending it regularly now.  

 

Something in your gut has raised these doubts.  Listen to your gut and give this relationship more time before looking into marriage and immigration.  (Just my opinion.)

[Kowatti 189]

Oh, Oh!  I see a red flag.  You have been helping her financially, I am assuming it was voluntary on your part.  Now the amount you are being asked to send is increasing.  I met my fiancé online, however I decided to visit & stay for a little over one month.  I observed everything.  It took me an additional 1 year of communicating back & forth before I decided to file for K1.  I am not judging.  When it comes to matters of the heart, we can get blinded by the moment.  My friend, please take your time & I know that you will make the right decision for yourself.

[Roel 7,191]

How about stop giving her money and see if she still 'likes you".

 

 

I can't even imagine asking my husband - when we were still dating - to help me out or send me money.

[NikLR 13,220]

10 minutes ago, Roel said:

How about stop giving her money and see if she still 'likes you".

 

 

I can't even imagine asking my husband - when we were still dating - to help me out or send me money.

My husband offered quite a bit, even before marriage, because that's in his character to do so.  But likely he also knew that I'd turn him down and do it on my own being independent. 

[Jaquelly 1,647]

11 minutes ago, Roel said:

How about stop giving her money and see if she still 'likes you".

 

 

I can't even imagine asking my husband - when we were still dating - to help me out or send me money.

I think Andy sent me money once - my dog got really sick and I needed the help. I paid him back like three days later via wire transfer.

If you are giving this woman money, of COURSE that's a red flag.

[Roel 7,191]

My husband offered me money once and I refused. Just because it didnt feel right to accept anything valuable until we get married. 

[tlatrice70 23]

18 hours ago, Umka36 said:

People who are ready for marriage don't typically talk about/worry, "Someone said if you can marry abroad but if i go that route it will cost less but if the marriage dissolves i am responsible for her for many years." Can't read the OP's mind, just what is posted.

 

 

I agree. Even though a question was posed regarding the best Visa option, there is an underlying uncertainty on financial support and responsibility.

[thatguyuknow 147]

You've answered your own question 'Not sure if I want to get married' 

 

Dont be cray cray and stop sending her regular money. You've been physically with her for 18days. 

 

And talking on video chat once a week? eh? What? If i don't talk to my partner once a day I go nuts. 

 

Wait along as you need, you'll know when the time is right. Took us 4 years to get married. 

[awakendabeast 0]

I am in a relationship with a cuban woman whom i care for very much. If i get married in the future what exactly does being her sponsor mean? How much am i on the line for? 10 years? On my part i love her but there is apart of me that says what if it doesnt work out is my life gonna take a mayor ding because i fell in love and will have to support her in the usa? If anyone has had a failed marriage to a foreigner i would like to know worst case scenario. thank you

[Chris&Ale 153]

19 hours ago, awakendabeast said:

I met my girlfriend 1 year ago since then i have traveled to cuba twice and she is wonderful. I plan on going for a longer time probably 1 month and visit her in her home town as i have only met her in La Habana and only met her aunt who lives there. She is awesome but yes i have some reservations because it is a long distance relationship and because cuba has a really bad reputation for men and women scamming tourist and sometimes with there partners consent. It is very scary to think it could be false. thanks in advance for any and all advice really appreciate it.

True, you could be misled but at the same time, the same thing could happen to anyone here in the US, right? As for K1 vs. Spousal visa, as other shave said, spousal takes from 3-7 months longer but is otherwise much cheaper and easier in the end. My fiance and I selected fiance option because as a friend told me [with the current uncertainty around possible immigration rules] it's best to just get him here as quick as you can. Get him here on US soil and then worry about the rest later. 

 

Also, I would caution that depending on what area of the country in which you live, the wait time for the temporary green card for people who file AOS after coming here as a fiance can be nearly 2 years. It all depends on where you live. Here in South Florida, I have friends who have waited nearly 18 months for their temporary green cards with no appointment date. Meanwhile, someone in another area might only have to wait maybe 5-8 months for it. 

 

Lastly, the Spousal visa allows the beneficiary to get their work permit within just a couple of weeks upon arrival, whereas for K1s who get married, the wait time can be 5 months or so.

 

 

[Roel 7,191]

Dude, do you really need to start the second thread? You got soo many good advices and you can ask this question there.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/683588-k1-visa-or-not-sure-want-to-marry-cuban-girlfriend/?page=2&tab=comments#comment-9366523

 

You want my honest opinion? You already have doubts, you think she might be a scammer and you're already worried about being on a hook for affidavit of support. This is pretty bad foundation of relationship.  My advice - break up, look for a local women so you don't have to worry about possible scams.

Edited September 7, 2018 by Roel

[Going through 5,668]

31 minutes ago, awakendabeast said:

On my part i love her but there is apart of me that says what if it doesnt work out is my life gonna take a mayor ding because i fell in love and will have to support her in the usa?

Well think of it this way:

 

Let's say you married a USC, and it didn't work out----your life could take a major ding then too in terms of alimony/child support/etc.

 

Life happens, marriages break down.  

 

If you felt the need to start two threads about whether you're making the right decision marrying this girl, perhaps you shouldn't get married.

 

 

 

 

[debbiedoo 2,339]

See your previous thread for all the answers.

 

You will not get better answers by posting a duplicate thread.

[Ontarkie 13,915]

~~Related questions merged. Please do not start more than one thread for related questions.~~

 

Mod hat off

 

Spend some time reading in the Effects of Major Family Changes.

Short answer is if she gets a good lawyer she can take you to the cleaners just like any other women. You could be made to pay the full 125% of the poverty line. If she never wants to lift a finger and support herself (work) it will most definitely be more than 10yrs as she will never earn 40 quaters. It is rare for that to happen but as we have seen it in the Effects forum it has happened.