Incredible difficult Visa journey

[Darrinos 6]

4 minutes ago, Christy&J said:

your post really touched me, unfortunately I can't advise you anything that would help you to be with your love.

 

I wish you luck and we believe that love will win the fight.

 

 

Thank you very much for that. In my search to find a way to her, there are honestly times when I feel like I'm all out of options. But, something inside of me keeps telling me not to quit, not to give up. And your right... love will always win as long as we just don't give up.

[Darrinos 6]

4 hours ago, Going through said:

Is there anything preventing you from moving to her country?  Seems that would be the quick and easier solution to wanting to be together.

Well, the fact that they won't even let me in the country any more certainly prevents that. Last time I tried to go to Bali, I wasn't even allowed to enter the plane in HK to fly there! They stopped me before I even got to Indonesia! It's just crazy. I've never broken a law there or ever done anything wrong. It's a beautiful, fascinating country and I wouldn't mind living/working there, if even only for a few years, but have no way of getting there. I made a friend with the airport immigration there, and he guarantees that he can get me in (bribe money included), but I can't even get there these days. It's so hard to accept, but it's where we are for now.

[2far 185]

Honestly, I’m not quite sure what kind of response you are expecting from any of these government officials. You are inquiring about how you can be with a married woman. 

The first step would be for her to get a divorce. If she is unwilling to divorce (for whatever reason) then I don’t see much hope at all in your case. 

[Lemonslice 4,549]

1 hour ago, Darrinos said:

Well, the fact that they won't even let me in the country any more certainly prevents that. Last time I tried to go to Bali, I wasn't even allowed to enter the plane in HK to fly there! They stopped me before I even got to Indonesia! It's just crazy. I've never broken a law there or ever done anything wrong. It's a beautiful, fascinating country and I wouldn't mind living/working there, if even only for a few years, but have no way of getting there. I made a friend with the airport immigration there, and he guarantees that he can get me in (bribe money included), but I can't even get there these days. It's so hard to accept, but it's where we are for now.

Don't you think countries have the right, and the responsibility, to protect their people - how can they be sure you won't reoffend?  

[Darrinos 6]

Well, thank you for your reply.... but you are not exactly accurate. True, the end goal is to be together and that cannot happen until she is no longer married. But what I am trying to do at this point is find a way for her to get that divorce, whether it be here in the US or some other country. The real goal right now is to get her out of the country. To see it so black and white as you have done ignores the personal story, the judgment, the harassment and the difficulty that she would face in doing so in Indonesian society. Compassion tells me that it would be better and easier for her to start this process elsewhere. Not living in Indonesia as a Christian woman, neither you nor I can imagine the difficulties and challenges. If I can find a way for her to get out of a very painful situation, then that's my goal. In fact, whether I get to have her by my side is really secondary. Although we share a love, her best interests are my focus and she deserves to share a life with someone to love, just as the rest of us. But again, thanks for your honesty and reply.

[Darrinos 6]

4 minutes ago, Lemonslice said:

Don't you think countries have the right, and the responsibility, to protect their people - how can they be sure you won't reoffend?  

Sure, they absolutely have a right; in fact, a responsibility, to protect their citizens. No doubt. However, the truth of the matter (referring to multiple studies) is that "sex offenders" are among the lowest of "re-offenders". The media, by and large, do not report this. The fact is that many of the people who have committed other crimes are allowed into these countries and are far more likely to re-offend. That being said, I don't mind the idea that the countries investigate, as long as they look at true facts and not simply do what the US tells them to do. By pushing the IML (International Megan's Law) and the AWA, the US bypasses due process, a constitutional right, and this seriously affects my ability to see my fiance and find a way for us to be together through any type of legal immigration policy.

[Lemonslice 4,549]

6 minutes ago, Darrinos said:

Well, thank you for your reply.... but you are not exactly accurate. True, the end goal is to be together and that cannot happen until she is no longer married. But what I am trying to do at this point is find a way for her to get that divorce, whether it be here in the US or some other country. The real goal right now is to get her out of the country. To see it so black and white as you have done ignores the personal story, the judgment, the harassment and the difficulty that she would face in doing so in Indonesian society. Compassion tells me that it would be better and easier for her to start this process elsewhere. Not living in Indonesia as a Christian woman, neither you nor I can imagine the difficulties and challenges. If I can find a way for her to get out of a very painful situation, then that's my goal. In fact, whether I get to have her by my side is really secondary. Although we share a love, her best interests are my focus and she deserves to share a life with someone to love, just as the rest of us. But again, thanks for your honesty and reply.

I don't doubt your love, but you seem to be minimizing your responsibility in the current situation.

[Darrinos 6]

In what way? I admit completely to my poor behavior, my breaking the law, and my regret and shame for doing so. I have lived within the law since and have done all that was required. US law has certain processes and triggers that are supposed to be available to us all, and all I'm saying is that things like due process, equal protection, and protection against ex post facto laws (retro-active) are something we should all receive. If you do a crime, pay your debt, and then move on. That's all I'm trying to do. I'm not asking for special treatment, I simply want to be with the woman I love, or have a chance to do so one day. So, what is the responsibility that I seem to be minimizing? I appreciate the honest debate.

[Boiler 43,397]

To summarise:

 

She is married

She can not come to the US

You can not go to her country

 

Any third country options?

 

[NicoAndNelle 127]

I thought we had hiccups on our journey, but geez what a story...... seriously!!!! I wish I could help but I cant. Blessings to you both and to anyone going through such difficult circumstances to be together

[Darrinos 6]

Yes, and that's the plan I'm working on at the present. As I've said, I'm simply waiting for the door to open, wherever that may be.

[Darrinos 6]

1 minute ago, NicoAndNelle said:

I thought we had hiccups on our journey, but geez what a story...... seriously!!!! I wish I could help but I cant. Blessings to you both and to anyone going through such difficult circumstances to be together

True! It's crazy what love will make us do sometimes! I would not be so tenacious if I doubted the strength or depth of our love or commitment. I appreciate the kind thoughts, and yes... to all the others out there, just keep the faith. Love will find a way.

[Lemonslice 4,549]

8 minutes ago, Darrinos said:

In what way?

...

So, what is the responsibility's that I seem to be minimizing? I appreciate the honest debate.

This part:  I've never broken a law there or  ever done anything wrong.

[Darrinos 6]

1 minute ago, Lemonslice said:

This part:  I've never broken a law there or  ever done anything wrong.

Forgive me... I meant in Indonesia.

[aajj 1]

Since it's been 14 years, since there wasn't a victim ever, and this became a barrier of you to get to anywhere, have you ever considered remove this harmful record away for good? 

 

I happened to have a peek of my husband's mails, one of his college buddy has the same situation, and he is trying to fix it now. Here is part of his letter: 

To get you an update, my attorney just completed the application for clemency to submit to the governor office. After I sign it, he will submit it. Hopefully the application will be approved and I will be cleared from everything.

BTW, his record is 9 years ago, shorter than yours. If he can do it, why not give it a try?

 

Sorry I can't offer more details, and I feel bad to leak this already. Please forgive me, I just want to help.

 

Anyway, good luck!