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duckhunter1

Broken hearted

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The relationship I had with my PH fiancé ended last night after I finally reached her by phone. We met in Dec. 2014 online and I visited her in May/June 2015. We got engaged and filed out the K-1 application diligently together. She left her home and went to Pampanga for a job there and virtually disappeared on me. She said she was still interested in coming here but that she wanted me to come get her sometime in 2016. This Visa in on the way to Manila right now. I felt she was stringing me along and could hear hesitation in her voice. I ended it. So sad after all this traveling, time commitment, K-1 diligence and financial investment. Why do girls change their mind so abruptly I will never know the answer to this question. Certainly isn't the first time this has happened to me but this is the most advance relationship with marriage intentions that I've had with a PH. I caution guys trying to accomplish this virtually impossible task.

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The reality may have hit her that she would be leaving everything she knows behind. Might be that it's not as easy to do as she thought. Could be that she has heard horror stories about making it to the U.S., only to end up being treated as a maid,..., or worse. Could be the family interfering too. The fear of the unknown can be a powerful thing. Hearing stories from friends already here in the U.S. about dealing with in laws and exes and past children and all the stress that goes with.

You two know what's best for your relationship, and what is the best for you two, same as any couple.

Point is, the culture shock/reality of the situation could take a while to set in. When it does, it takes some understanding and patience to work through it together if you really want to make a life together. It takes teamwork and effort, and lots of reassurance to get over some of these fears.

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Sorry to hear about this duckhunter it's so heartbreaking to breakup after a serious commitment, but look on the brighter side and be glad it happened now than later when u guys are together and have started your lives together,if she can't cross hurdles now with u then she won't be able to do it later too,divorce is much more devastating.you will find someone soon who is Godsent, just hold on and don't give up...God bless u dear

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I'm really sorry to hear about your break up. One thing you might consider is giving any relationship, but especially an international relationship, more time. Get to know her better online, and take more trips to visit her. The more time you give it, the more both of you will be sure it's real. With international relationships you both need to understand each other's cultures, and taking your time will allow this to happen. And finally, one other thing... consider marrying in her country and applying for a CR-1 visa instead of K-1 fiancee visa. Again, it takes about an extra 6 months but you're waiting with a much deeper commitment. Good luck in whatever you choose to do.


Marriage: 2014-02-23
CR1 started : 2014-06-06
CR1 completed/POE : 2015-07-13
ROC started : 2017-04-14 - CSC

ROC interview/completed: 2018-08-16 - Albuquerque

N400 started: 2018-04-24

N400 interview: 2018-08-16 - Albuquerque

Oath ceremony: 2018-09-24 - Santa Fe

 

April 2017 I-751 Filers Spreadsheet

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1t335PrkwxPk7sRryv02NH3vrWHy0vlkBxjmPy5VYJO8/edit#gid=0

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The relationship I had with my PH fiancé ended last night after I finally reached her by phone. We met in Dec. 2014 online and I visited her in May/June 2015. We got engaged and filed out the K-1 application diligently together. She left her home and went to Pampanga for a job there and virtually disappeared on me. She said she was still interested in coming here but that she wanted me to come get her sometime in 2016. This Visa in on the way to Manila right now. I felt she was stringing me along and could hear hesitation in her voice. I ended it. So sad after all this traveling, time commitment, K-1 diligence and financial investment. Why do girls change their mind so abruptly I will never know the answer to this question. Certainly isn't the first time this has happened to me but this is the most advance relationship with marriage intentions that I've had with a PH. I caution guys trying to accomplish this virtually impossible task.

It's better to find out now then later but that is the reality. Yes, a long distance relationship is difficult at best. My wife and I talked for hours a day on the MJphone/skype and every day she was there, same time same place. I never had my doubts about her. We spent 2 years talking even before I scheduled a trip. Once I made the trip then I knew that she was for me. I proposed and we began the process of getting her papers in order. Then I returned back for the interview with her as support, and I was curious how this all worked at the Embassy. To this day she appreciated everything I did for her and her children to get them to the US and into a better life. I truly love her and I am glad she is with me. We just became Lola and Lolo's last week as her daughter gave birth to a 7lb boy.

Anyway, I digressed. Don't give up on the Philippines as the people are truly wonderful. But, keep in mind that you have to take your time.

There is nothing wrong in staying in touch with her and giving her some space. 2016 is not that far away. Who knows, another trip and more time it may work. Good Luck.


Spoiler

Adjustment of Status

AOS March 5, 2014 Submitted AOS with EAD/AP package to Chicago USICS

Delivered March 8, 2014 AOS packaged delivered to USCIS drop box

Accepted March 19, 2014 Text message with receipt numbers

Biometrics April 16, 2014 Biometrics completed

EAD May 23, 2014 Employment Authorization Document approved and went to card production

TD May 23, 2014 Travel Document approved and went for card production

Receipt EAD/AP May 30, 2014 Received combo card EAD/AP

Green Card Approved July 11, 2014 Approved, no interview. Went to card production.

Green Card received July 17, 2014 GC received without interview

Removal of Conditions

Mailed I-751 Dec 16, 2015 Submitted ROC (removal of conditions)

Received Dec 18, 2015 USPS notification of successful delivery

Check Cashed Dec 21, 2015 Check was cashed

NOA-1 Issued Dec 21, 2015 NOA-1 for ROC issued

NOA-1 Issued Dec 26, 2015 NOA-1 Received

Biometrics Appt. Jan 29, 2016 Biometrics Appointment Scheduled [Completed]

 

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Better it happened now than later when she was already here in the US.

Don't give up on romance. You have more wisdom now and have a much better chance of finding someone who is right for you.

Good luck!


K-1 Visa

**AOS**

09/03/2014 AOS packet (I-485, I-765, I-131) delivered to Chicago lockbox

09/08/2014 NOA1 received for AOS, EAD, AP

10/01/2014 Biometrics

11/04/2014 I-485: Status changed to Testing and Interview

11/12/2014 EAD & AP Approved, combo card in production

11/22/2014 EAD/AP Combo card received

02/04/2015 AOS Interview - approved! Card in production

02/12/2015 Card received!

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Like all others I'm sorry to hear this outcome for your relationship. You are in a small minority to the best of my knowledge of relationships that don't work out .

I don't want to meddle at all so There is no need to answer if you prefer not to, but do you know what city she found employment in Pampanga?


IR-1/CR-1 Visa
Service Center : Vermont Service Center
Consulate : Manila, Philippines
Marriage (if applicable): 2014-05-17
I-130 Sent : 2014-06-23
I-130 NOA1 : 2014-06-25
I-130 RFE : 2014-08-11 (Wanted NSO Marriage Certificate, not LCR)
I-130 RFE Sent : 2014-08-14
I-130 Approved : 2014-08-27
NVC Received : 2014-09-15
Received DS-261 / AOS Bill : 2014-09-17
Pay AOS Bill : 2014-09-17
Submit DS-261 : 2014-09-17
Send AOS Package : 2014-09-19
Receive IV Bill : 2014-10-03
Pay IV Bill : 2014-10-03
Received Interview Letter by E-mail: 2015-03-20 (May 5, 2015)
SLEC completed: 2015-04-22
Visa Approved: 2015-05-05
Visa Issued: 2015-05-15 (221g for no CENOMAR!)

Visa Received: 2015-05-21

POE: Chicago 2015-09-14

GC Received: 2015-11-17

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Im so sorry this happened to you, not all of us are like that. You will find the right girl for you sooner or later (or it will just come along). Not all Long distance relationships end like that. Almost 7 years of LDR for me and im happy to be with him now.


   

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I feel sorry that this happened to you but everything happens for a reason. We all deserve to be happy.

I agree, it must be that it was too fast for her and the seeing herself moving from Masbate to the US is very vague in a span of less than a year. Yes it will be pretty scary is she haven't expanded her world from Masbate.

I hope you will not generalize us Philippine ladies with this experience.

I don't want to meddle at all so There is no need to answer if you prefer not to, but do you know what city she found employment in Pampanga?

I really hope and pray she is not working in Angeles City, Pampanga now.


AOS/ AED/ AP:

(California Service Center, Chula Vista, San Diego, CA)

Filed: Aug 29

Receipt Date: Sept 2

NOA 1 Date: Sept 12 (received text/email)

NOA 1 copy rcvd: Sept 16

Biometrics Notice Date: Sept 17, received Sept 24

Biometrics Sched: Oct 5

Successful walk-in: Sept 26

Oct 13- Case ready to be scheduled for interview

EAD/AP approved - Nov. 1/2 / Received EAD/ AP Combo Card- Nov. 15

50days from NOA1/ 64 days from receipt date.

January 30-  USCIS Ap update, Interview sched on March 3, 2017

Jan 31 - received USCIS letter/ Notice for interview 

March 3- Interview, approved on the Spot

March 8 - received GC

Dec 2018 - To file ROC

 

My Blogs:

I-129F Petition Process

Medical Requirements

Medical Exam Experience

US Embassy Manila K1/K2 Interview Preparation Requirements and Instructions

Interview (K1 with 2 K2s)

CFO Guidance and Counseling (applicable to applicant from Philippines only)

My K1 Visa Journey

8 August 2015 - Sent I-129F Packet thru USPS

17 August 2015 - I -797C Notice date

20 August 2015 - Received printed copy of NOA1 dated Aug 17.

2 September 2015 - APPROVED! (14 working days from receipt date)

Dec. 21-22 - Medical DONE!

Jan 11, 2016 - Interview- APPROVED!

Jan 15 - Visa ISSUED!

Jan 21 - VISA ON HAND! (8 working days from interview)

March 21 - CFO / PDOS for K2s

June 1, 2016 - POE

July 18, 2016 - Married

I am his and he is mine from this day until the end of my days..

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Im so sorry this happened to you, not all of us are like that. You will find the right girl for you sooner or later (or it will just come along). Not all Long distance relationships end like that. Almost 7 years of LDR for me and im happy to be with him now.

Off topic..... But only 6 months for a CR1 visa! That's REALLY fast.


IR-1/CR-1 Visa
Service Center : Vermont Service Center
Consulate : Manila, Philippines
Marriage (if applicable): 2014-05-17
I-130 Sent : 2014-06-23
I-130 NOA1 : 2014-06-25
I-130 RFE : 2014-08-11 (Wanted NSO Marriage Certificate, not LCR)
I-130 RFE Sent : 2014-08-14
I-130 Approved : 2014-08-27
NVC Received : 2014-09-15
Received DS-261 / AOS Bill : 2014-09-17
Pay AOS Bill : 2014-09-17
Submit DS-261 : 2014-09-17
Send AOS Package : 2014-09-19
Receive IV Bill : 2014-10-03
Pay IV Bill : 2014-10-03
Received Interview Letter by E-mail: 2015-03-20 (May 5, 2015)
SLEC completed: 2015-04-22
Visa Approved: 2015-05-05
Visa Issued: 2015-05-15 (221g for no CENOMAR!)

Visa Received: 2015-05-21

POE: Chicago 2015-09-14

GC Received: 2015-11-17

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I really hope and pray she is not working in Angeles City, Pampanga now.

That's what I wanted to know without directly asking. If so, then making the relationship work over time will be much more challenging for each of them for many reasons. Not saying they still can't make it work, just more difficult.


IR-1/CR-1 Visa
Service Center : Vermont Service Center
Consulate : Manila, Philippines
Marriage (if applicable): 2014-05-17
I-130 Sent : 2014-06-23
I-130 NOA1 : 2014-06-25
I-130 RFE : 2014-08-11 (Wanted NSO Marriage Certificate, not LCR)
I-130 RFE Sent : 2014-08-14
I-130 Approved : 2014-08-27
NVC Received : 2014-09-15
Received DS-261 / AOS Bill : 2014-09-17
Pay AOS Bill : 2014-09-17
Submit DS-261 : 2014-09-17
Send AOS Package : 2014-09-19
Receive IV Bill : 2014-10-03
Pay IV Bill : 2014-10-03
Received Interview Letter by E-mail: 2015-03-20 (May 5, 2015)
SLEC completed: 2015-04-22
Visa Approved: 2015-05-05
Visa Issued: 2015-05-15 (221g for no CENOMAR!)

Visa Received: 2015-05-21

POE: Chicago 2015-09-14

GC Received: 2015-11-17

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Like all others I'm sorry to hear this outcome for your relationship. You are in a small minority to the best of my knowledge of relationships that don't work out .

I don't want to meddle at all so There is no need to answer if you prefer not to, but do you know what city she found employment in Pampanga?

She probably GRO

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